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Wow. thought Harry. ' This man, my Godfather can escape Azkaban sane. How amazing, iv never really thought about it before. It must take real strength, to push away insanity, to push away the need to give up and die, to ignore the pain and the sorrow. I imagine Sirius must have had plenty of bad memories to feed off of, his false imprisonment, the loss of my father etc. But he never gave in to them. I fainted when i saw a dementor for God sake. I have never considered how he must have felt, sitting there day after day, year after years untill the consept of time simply vanished. With nobody to talk to, nothing to do apart from sit and consider the horrifying thoughts you manage conjur up in your own mind. The mind can be a dangerous thing if let to sit and rot in a place of darkness for a long time. And that is what Azkaban is, its a place of total and utter terror. Not a nice palce to be inspecting the corners of your mind. Where even sane thoughts waver. For a person to ignore pain, to ignore everything that was thrown at him, for him to ignore the sheer nothingness of it all. I couldnt do it, with a mind like mine. Id die. But Sirius never gave in to death. Never, so here he is with me now.
So why, i ask myself, does he freak out when i tell him im gay? He can survive Azkaban but faints when i tell him iv been dating Draco Malfoy.
