Gwen stood in the window, staring out into the distance. She couldn't sleep. Her bed was cold and empty without Arthur. She had waited a month for his return, or for word from Merlin. Nothing had come. Nothing at all. She closed her eyes and felt the wind cold against the tears on her cheek. Tomorrow they would give up hope and Arthur would be declared dead. She would be Queen.
Merlin's horse slowed to a trot as Camelot came into view. In fifty years it had not changed. Memories tugged at Merlin's heart and fogged his eyes with tears. The sun was setting over the castle. He pulled his hood up over his greyed hair. His face had not aged a day, but his hair had slowly lost its colour. It had turned from jet black to a dirty grey. His eyes were as bright as ever, but looked heavy despite the youthfulness of his features.
Soon he was in the courtyard, dismounting as a boy with a mop of dark hair took his horse to the stable. Two guards approached. They looked him up and down, from his muddy boots to ragged cape.
"What is your business, boy?"
He knew he shouldn't have shaved his three-foot grey beard. Nobody called him boy when he was hidden by matted grey hair. But he smiled despite himself.
"I'm here on invitation of the Queen," he said and his eyes glowed golden for a fraction of a second.
The guards' pupils widened unnaturally.
"Right away, Sir", they sung sleepily in chorus.
Merlin followed the men through the keep.
Gwen tucked a white lock of hair behind her ear with a shaky hand as she read her book by the fire. Her fingers were arthritic and the skin across them wrinkled. The jewels in her wedding ring still shone bright, but it seemed a stranger's hand to her now.
There was a knock at the door of her chamber.
"Enter", she said in a shaky voice. She felt weak.
"Your Majesty, you have an urgent visitor," stuttered her guard.
"Who is it at this hour? They come unannounced."
"It is, err…" the guard looked suddenly very confused.
"Well, Patrick?"
The guard seemed to be going red with concentration.
"I…I can't actually recall, Your Majesty."
Gwen sighed at her guard's incompetence. Her brow furrowed.
"You are dismissed, Patrick, I do not wish to have counsel with a stranger at this hour. I will forgive your incompetence only once," she chastised sternly.
She returned to her book without waiting for a response. Patrick backed out of the room with a bow, his brow furrowed with worry.
"You have grown strict with your age", whispered a deep voice that sounded almost familiar.
Gwen gasped and dropped her book. She turned her head towards the figure standing in the corner of the room, his face in shadow.
"Who's there?" she asked, disgusted at the tremble in her voice.
"It has been a long time, Gwen," Merlin said as he took a step towards her.
Gwen was suddenly breathless, "Merlin?" she gasped.
Her face filled with a shocked sadness. Her voice caught in her throat.
Once Gwen would have cried openly, she would have spilt her feelings and her thoughts. Now her face only hardened suddenly, the lines around her eyes grew deeper shadows.
"Why have you come?" She said turning away from Merlin and towards the fire.
Merlin slowly moved towards the queen. He felt the warmth from the fire on his cheeks.
"I'm sorry, Gwen. I'm so sorry." He knelt by her chair and placed his hand on top of hers, it was cold to the touch. She didn't seem to react, but she was looking intently at his soft young hand on top of hers.
"You haven't changed," she whispered, her voice had softened slightly.
"Yes I have," Merlin returned darkly.
Gwen turned to him now, and looked him deeply in the eyes. He had become a legend in all this time, and a stranger. She moved her hand away from his.
"Why have you come?" She repeated, the accusation returning to her voice.
"To say goodbye."
"You never did. You never returned", sadness once more consumed her features, somehow softening her face.
Merlin shook his head sadly, and looked down ashamed.
"I'm sorry I couldn't save him, Gwen."
Gwen's face hardened again and she looked back towards the flames. Then Merlin whispered something in an ancient tongue and the fire exploded into golden cinders. They filled the centre of the room and Gwen gasped. As they fell they formed into the shape of a man she had not seen in half a century. Suddenly Arthur stood before them, created of golden, red, and amber cinders. He knelt before them on one knee and reached out to Gwen. Her eyes sparkled in his glowing light, filled with tears.
"He is the once and future King. He will return, Gwen. And until then I will wait," Merlin whispered.
The golden Arthur slowly disappeared from before them, and the hearth was left with a fine soot sprinkled over it. The light faded from Gwen's face, and she nodded her understanding.
"But not me, my part is done." She said, resignedly. Her breathing was laboured.
"You brought Arthur's peace to fruition, Gwen. Without you all that Arthur dreamed would have died with him."
"You are the legend, Merlin. Your magic you kept secret all those years," her breathing slowed, and her face softened into a smile. "We all thought you were so hopelessly courageous in Arthur's shadow. You never were the big muscly type," she quipped, remembering their first meeting.
Merlin laughed softly, noticing Gwen's breathing had slowed more and her eyes were heavy.
"I never forgot you. I was always watching, waiting. I'm sorry, Gwen."
"I forgive you, Merlin," her voice was raspy now, and Merlin stroked her cold hand.
"Goodbye, Guinevere," Merlin said softly, his eyes stinging.
Her eyes glazed over and her last breath left her body slowly. Merlin stood back, lifted his hood back over his head and left.
He was already outside the castle by the time the bells began to chime the Queen's death. Camelot, silhouetted against the moonlit sky, dropped out of view but he could still hear the bells tolling. He would hear them still years later.
