It had been a long day. The scorching sun and bad headlines brought the newsies back early that day, their faces red from the sun and their clothes drenched in sweat. The morning should have been a sign that the day would not go well. Another fight with the Delanceys had left Crutchie with a black eye and Dollface being held back by Jack. The rest of the day she couldn't get the image of them laughing and walking away out of her head. It had been a bad day for everyone, so they were relieved to go to bed and put the day to an end. Dollface had only been asleep for an hour or so when Racetrack shook her awake.
"Doll, wake up," he said, a panicked look on his face. "It's Crutchie." Those two words woke Dollface up like a bucket of cold water. She jumped down off her bed and saw everyone standing to the side of Crutchie's bed, Jack sitting next to him trying to wake him up. Crutchie was thrashing around in his sleep, mumbling incoherently and a terrified look on his face. Jack said nothing but merely got out of the way when he saw Dollface awake. She took Jack's place sitting next to Crutchie.
"Crutchie, wake up!" she shouted, shaking his shoulder. It did nothing as he ventured deeper into his nightmare. After shaking him another few seconds, she finally just slapped him, hard, across the face. He bolted upright, breathing heavily and looking around the room in a panic. Dollface grabbed his face and forced him to look at her. His eyes were wide in fear and his face covered in sweat.
"Crutch, it's me," she said quietly. "You's alright. You's here in the boardin house. It was a dream. Just a bad, bad dream." He looked around at everyone standing by them and slowly to the rest of the room. He began to calm down, seeing Dollface was telling the truth.
"But I wasn't... I couldn't... I don't know..." he stuttered, trying to form a sentence.
"Calm down ok," Dollface said soothingly. She began slowly combing her fingers through his hair. "You're safe. We's all right here. Kloppman's downstairs. You want me to get him?" Crutchie shook his head, still catching his breath. Dollface took the glass of water that Jack handed her and gave it to Crutchie.
"Drink a few sips," she told him. His shaky hand lifted the glass to his mouth as he swallowed two large gulps. Dollface took the glass from him and set it on the dresser. He still looked very nervous.
"What happened?" she asked. "Wanna talk about it?" He quickly shook his head.
"No, I'm fine," he said quietly, his eyes flicking up quickly to the boys that surrounded them. Dollface knew he wasn't going to say anything with everyone watching and gave Jack a look.
"Alright fellas let's get back to bed," Jack said, getting the idea. "Crutchie's good. We's all tired now let's just go back to sleep alright." Dollface looked carefully at Crutchie as he fixed his stare to a spot on his blanket.
"Crutchie, please tell me," Dollface said, the noise of everyone moving giving them a little more privacy. "It's just me here. I won't tell anyone."
"I don't wanna talk about it," he said again, shaking his head.
"I ain't neva seen you like that before, Crutch," Dollface said, as he reached for his glass of water. "It was scary. There's obviously something on your mind, something bad. I don't know what I can do to make it betta but talking would help a lot." Crutchie said nothing but merely took a small sip of water.
"Ok well how about this," she said, thinking of something. "I'll just ask you questions and you can just say yes or no." He shrugged so Dollface move to lie down next to him.
"Was it anything to do with us? One of the newsies?" she asked, watching his reaction. He shook his head.
"Ok what about our scum of a fatha?" Again, he shook his head.
"Was it about me?" Another no.
"Was it about the Delanceys?" He hesitated a moment before shaking his head. Dollface noticed as his hands began shaking slightly. She knew what it was.
"Was it the refuge, Crutch?" He didn't move but after a few moments, nodded his head, a slight blushing creeping upon his cheeks. Crutchie had not mentioned the refuge since the strike. Only once had he ever said anything about it and it was only that he was glad Governor Roosevelt closed it. He refused to answer any questions about his time there during the strike, a dark look appearing on his face anytime someone brought it up. So they stopped talking about it. It had been months since the strike and Crutchie was just as cheerful as ever. But now it was very clear the weight of his experience in the refuge sat too heavily upon his shoulders.
"Crutchie, it's ok to have a nightmare about the refuge," Dollface said, sitting up to face him. "It was a horrible, horrible place which is why they shut it down. You're safe here, you know that. But don't you think it would help to talk some about what happened there?"
"Nightmares," he said, looking into his glass of water.
"What?" Dollface asked, confused.
"You said 'a nightmare.' I've had these before," he explained. "Lots. Maybe one or two a week since I came back. No one ever noticed before though so I would just wake up, calm down, and go back to sleep. I didn't mean to make a fuss."
"You's been havin one or two nightmares a week?" Dollface repeated.
"I had 'em nearly every night for the first week or so after the strike," he said. "I just had a worse one tonight."
"Crutchie, I'm your sista," she said, almost pleadingly. "Talk to me about this. I don't wanna eva see you like that again. And the nightmares is only gonna get worse."
Crutchie said nothing but looked around at the room. It had been quiet for about a minute now as everyone was settled back in their beds. Suddenly he sat up, setting his water down and getting out of bed.
"Let's go to the roof," he said, grabbing his crutch. "It's too quiet here." Dollface quickly stood up, slipping on her boots, and followed Crutchie out of the room. They turned to the left, walking past the closet that held extra blankets, pillows, towels, and soap, and opened the door to the roof. Kloppman didn't like them going up there but had long ago given up keeping the door locked. Anytime he was sure it was locked and secure, they just found another way to pick the lock. But since Kloppman no longer forbid them from going on the roof, the rush of sneaking up in the middle of the night had disappeared. Only on nice nights would they go up to get some fresh air while playing games.
Dollface propped the door open so they wouldn't get locked out and turned back to Crutchie. He had his back to her and was looking out over the edge of the building leaning on the small wall. She walked over and stood next to him, looking out too. There wasn't anything specific he was looking at, Dollface knew that. They both stood there for a few minutes in silence, taking in the sights and sounds of the city in the middle of the night. Dollface felt a strange sort of comfort whenever there was a loud sound, as if they were being reminded they weren't the only ones still awake.
"You ready to talk?" Dollface finally asked, turning to Crutchie. He took one last glance at the city before him and faced her.
"Yeah," he said, exhaling deeply. "I'll tell you what happened at the refuge."
