Working Hard or Hardly Working?

To: the most stubborn man I've ever met

From: Your best friend of 10 years

Date Received: September 28, 2007

Dear Ron,

How are you? I haven't seen you in a week or so….still mad at me are you?

RESPOND YOU GIT

Love,

Hermione

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September 29, 2007

To: girl who ratted out her best friend to his mother

From: Still angry

Dear Hermione,

You deserve at least another week of the silent treatment. I mean yes technically I should have told my mother that I didn't appreciate the newest maroon sweater this Christmas. But seriously did you have to laugh after she asked me why I never wore it? Anyways I'll talk to you tomorrow you evil women.

Still Seeking Revenge,

Ron

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September 29, 2007

To: Big Scary Man

From: Oh I'm so scared

Ron,

Two words: BRING IT

-Hermione

Ps. Maroon is your color. Own it.

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September 30, 2007

To: Boy who never died

From: The Best looking of the trio

Harry,

Lets agree to no longer associate with Hermione. She insulted my manliness. Bah women.

Ron

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September 30, 2007

To: Less then a man

From: Your own personal advice columnist

Ron,

Angry that she exposed your hatred of maroon sweaters or are you just expressing your frustration that you still aren't manly enough to ask her out?

With All The Manly Love in the world,

Harry "The Man" Potter

PS. Quiditch Saturday? Fred, George, Bill, Charlie, Angelina, Katie, you and obviously me? Oh do you know if Ginny is coming?

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September 30, 2007

To: "The Man"

From: The better man

Harry,

Who said I was afraid to ask Hermione out? I just have chosen not to. For your information I like someone else. But because you are a git I won't tell you who. Ha!

Ron

PS. Saturday sounds good. And I believe Ginny will be there as long as she isn't sentenced to Azkaban first for killing Fleur….

PPS. We graduated Hogwarts exactly 3 years and 3 months ago. You're and auror and I'm a professional quiditch player. Shall we celebrate by getting drinks? Yes I believe we should. Invite Hermione she told me she is stopping by your office in an hour, meet up then?

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-Harry's office-

Hermione: I can't believe that my self centered arrogant prat of a boss just marched in there and told me he thought my report was rubbish. But I bet you anything it wasn't the report he didn't like, he just doesn't like me!

Harry: Hermione! Slow down…what happened?

Hermione: Today at work I had a very important meeting with my client, Mr. Whitlet, when my boss just strutted in to tell me my work was slipping and my latest status report was awful. Mr. Whitlet got up and left. Of course he didn't want a business associate whose work was slipping. So you know what I did? I quit!

Harry: WHAT? After one lost client you quit? That's completely irrational.

Hermione: BUT it wasn't the first client. It was the 6th. I've been losing clients all of this past month and I know its just because my boss hates me. And he only hates me because I wouldn't go out with him that arrogant selfish prick!

Harry: So you quit?

Hermione: Yeah

Harry: Without any other job options?

Hermione: Well yeah…

Harry: What are you going to do now?

Hermione: I don't know. I never really liked business very much there was never much time for any social life and I know my mother really wants me to start dating again. I'll explore my options I guess.

Harry: Dating? Do you have anyone in mind?

Hermione: Not yet but I'm looking….speaking of dating have you asked out Ginny yet?

Harry: Uh well no but its only because I doubt she will say yes

Hermione: Hmm

Harry: Do you know something?

Hermione: Well…..

Harry: HERMIONE!

Hermione: Here is the deal you set me up with someone and I'll tell you all about Ginny's love life. I just really need a date to get my parents off my back. Something about wanting grandchildren. Sheez you would think they could wait a little as I am only 21 but no they keep asking.

Harry: Fine. Deal.

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To: Red hair weasel king

From: Scar face

Ron,

You like someone other then Hermione? This is shocking? Who is it mate? Do I know them? Want me to set you up? Do you like Lavender? Parvati? Padma? Hannah? Susan? Luna? Milicent? Ew forget the last one. We need to discuss this.

Harry

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To: Gossip Girl

From: The only man in this conversation

Harry,

Lavender? Been there done that. Parvati? Too smart for me. Padma? Two words: Yule ball fiasco. Oh wait that was three. Hannah? Who? Susan? Quiet but deadly. Milicent? I vomited a little.

Ron

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To: Romeo

From: Cupid

Ron,

You forgot Luna. Hmm

Harry

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To: Freak

From: Romeo

Harry,

I didn't say anything!

Ron

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To: Draco Malfoy

From: Blaise Zabini

Draco,

You can come out of hiding now you're crazy ex-girlfriend has left her position of camping out in your apartment. I do need help though with these briefs so we need you back at the firm and stat. We lawyers can't function without our man whore boss.

Blaise

PS. Maybe if you stopped go out with every girl in London then you could walk freely without being attacked.

PPS. Congratz on winning Witch Weekly's Best Body for the 10th time in a row. I'm sure all those 12 year old girls are swooning over you somewhere.

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To: Blaise "Unattractive" Zabini

From: Draco "Best Bodied" Malfoy

Zabini,

I would take your advice but then again unlike you I like women. You see my dear friend we live two different life styles. Mine is fun yours is more…..well married.

Malfoy

PS. I have dated way more then the girls in London. Make it England.

PPS. Jealous?

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To: Ginny Weasley

From: Hermione Granger

Ginny,

Did you see witch weekly's new edition. Draco Malfoy (yes the very same egotistical arse) won England's best body. I laughed so hard. Apparently the evil rodent look is in. Ha!

XOXO,

Hermione

PS. A certain raven-haired man is interested in you. I know you want him should I arrange a date?

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To: Hermione

From: Ginny

Hermione,

As far as Draco Malfoy goes you can't deny he is attractive at least physically. Visually he is a god, personality wise you might as well throw him out of a moving bus.

Love,

Ginny

PS. I have no idea what you are talking about…..

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To: Blaise Zabini

From: Hermione Granger

Dear Mr. Zabini,

I recently came upon your job listing which entailed a open position for a financial consultant at your law firm. I would love to schedule an interview if possible. Please let me know.

Sincerely,

Hermione Granger

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To: Ginny, Harry and Ron

From: Hermione

I'VE GONE MAD. I APPLIED FOR A JOB APPLICATION AT A LAWFIRM. WHOSE LAWFIRM MIGHT YOU ASK. BLAISE ZABINI. Yes the former slytherin. But it seemed like the perfect job. Nice pay, perfect hours and a company car. Take away the conniving boss and you got yourself a job. Hmm am I crazy?

Confused,

Hermione

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To: Hermione

From: Harry

You don't mean the Blaise Zabini, do you? Because if you do you are in for a surprise. His partner at his law firm is none other than Malfoy. Yes scum of the earth Malfoy. That job is definitely not right for you.

Concerned,

Harry

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To: Harry

From: Hermione

WHAT? I just was offered the job and I took it. Oh god…..I'm in trouble now.

Hermione