Warning:Self mutilation, possible smut, incest in later chaps, swearing
Disclaimer: I don't own the Jonas Brothers or their TV show, I don't own The Cutter's Lullaby poem, I don't own anything except original characters.
None of them ever intended their solution to get so out of hand. Where had they gone wrong? When? The flashing red and bue lights, the agonizing cries from family and friends, shouts from paramedics as they pressed hard onto his chest trying to save him. The silver metal and brightly colored plastic stand out sharply against the deep red pool it lies in. As life slips from him his mind can't focus, his senses blur. His eyes attempt to focus on anything that moves; the pumping blood, the face of the EMTs, dust particles. Shooting stabs of pain and guilt and yes the familiar high he gets. Like a meth addict he need it, craves it, even in darkest hour, even if it's only for one single moment.
He wants to say something before he goes. Some sort of comforting goodbye in case he really doesn't make it.
All he can think of is the Cutter's Lullaby. He hums the words to the tune of one of his songs. His eyelids grow heavier and he really believes he might not be saved. That he's going to hell. And that's almost OK with him.
Author's Note: I wrote Frankie out of this fic. Instead there's a sister, older than Nick but younger than Joe. Reviews would be fantastic. And just so this can legally be on fanfic, their last names are Lucas.
