Author's Note: I suddenly had an idea, what if Susan actually remembered Narnia, before the train crash. Doesn't really explain anything, and honestly, not one of my best I think. Regardless, I hope that you'll read, review and enjoy.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Chronicles of Narnia nor its characters that you recognize. I do own the Hastings and perhaps even the flower 'Starshine'. Yeah, creative. That's what happens when I'm not C.S. Lewis, to whom everything belongs to.


Susan was rushing hurriedly through the Pevensies' home, making sure that everything was perfect for the arrival of their guests. Flying through the living room, she passed by Peter and Edmund fussing about their carefully combed hair and ties, grumbling and rolling their eyes at Susan's attempts to make them look 'presentable' for Mr. and Mrs. Hastings' visit. Susan had met the young Adeline Hastings while in America, and the rich British lady had taken quite a shine to the beautiful and well-mannered Susan. She was an important person in society and Susan was quite adamant that nothing would ruin her good impression and favour of Susan.

Ignoring them, Susan was all too aware of her little sister's absence. Sighing with exasperation, Susan headed straight out to the little garden in their home, for she was sure that Lucy would no doubt be day dreaming, yet again with absolutely no regard for proper decorum whatsoever.

Sure enough, she spied Lucy lying on the carefully trimmed lawn, arms spread out wide, staring at the clear, blue sky. Susan cringed to see that she was in her best dress which, most unfortunately, was white. No doubt it was already stained with mud and grass. Shaking her head, she walked to sit by her sister.

Lucy didn't give any indication that she was aware of Susan's presence. The two sisters didn't speak, letting silence wash over them as they felt the cool breeze caress their hair and faces. And for once, Susan didn't mind that the wind would mess up her carefully curled hair. The gentle wind almost made her remember who she really was.

'I miss Narnia.'

Susan didn't respond. How was she to reply to that? How was she to comfort her little sister on something she was unsure of? So she didn't speak, and Lucy took her silence as that of denial and reproach.

Sitting up in a huff, Lucy scrubbed hard at her eyes and Susan saw the tear tracks that marred her sister's freckled face. Gently -for was she not the Gentle Queen once?-, she took Lucy's hands in her own and took out a white little handkerchief. Wiping her sister's tear stained face, she gently admonished her, 'Don't scrub so hard Lu, you'll make your eyes look red and puffy.' Brushing Lucy's golden hair from her face lovingly, she smiled at Lucy's pout, marveling at how much her baby sister had grown. 'There, you look pretty darling.'

Lucy only stared sadly at Susan; were appearances and beauty all that mattered to her? Susan saw the accusing stare in her sister's eyes and sighed once more. She seemed to be doing that for quite a while with Lucy these days.

Silence ensued. But it was an awkward silence, where neither of them knew what to speak of to the other. Lucy couldn't stand it; she never could sit still in one place without speaking, after all. The words that had been bubbling and boiling within her burst forth, both desperate and hopeful at once.

'Oh Susan, what's happened to us? We were such good friends don't you remember? When you and I were both Queens and tall and beautiful? Remember when we rode to Tashbaan and Archenland and Calormen, just us two? Remember when we laughed over your ridiculous suitors and their silly attempts to make you wed them? Don't you remember anything from Narnia?'

Still, the once Gentle Queen remained silent. Lucy's heart broke. She couldn't believe that her sister could not, would not remember their dear home. Silent tears streamed down her face once more as she prayed with all her heart to Aslan that Susan would remember.

Susan stared at the ground, running her fingers through the grass. How different things are here in England, all hard and coarse and unfeeling. She knew Lucy was crying, crying at her constant denial that Narnia was just a game and they had to grow up and stop pretending. She hated making Lucy cry, but oh it just hurt so much to even think about the home she was banished from! It was so very easy for Lucy to hold on to Narnia; her faith made it easier for her to believe and never forget. But Susan didn't have that faith. She wasn't as strong as Lucy, to remember the joy and the pain at finding and losing Narnia all at once. Desperately, she silently screamed a prayer to dear Aslan, that He could show her the way.

A whisper of a roar sounded in her ears, and Susan's eyes filled with tears to hear that beloved voice purr her name with so much love. Susan, it whispered, and was no more. But that one simple word filled her heart with courage and indeed, she felt once again like the Queen that she once was.

Suddenly, Susan broke the thick silence between them. 'Do you remember Lu, those little, pale pink flowers that bloomed only in winter? What did Oreius call them again? Moonshine?'

Lucy whipped her head to stare at Susan, a smile slowly breaking out as she realized that Susan remembered. A full grin now on her lips, she answered promptly, 'It was Starshine Su, and you never could remember that name no matter how many times Pete and Ed and I tried to correct you. And it was pale yellow, not pink, silly.' Giggling, she gasped playfully as Susan nudged her, hard in the ribs. She laughed. 'Susan! Really! How unladylike of you! What would darling Adeline say if she saw you act this way?'

Susan threw her head back and laughed, raven black hair shining in the midafternoon sun. Lucy was overjoyed, she had not seen Susan laugh like that ever since she and Peter were forbidden to go back to Narnia. 'Oh bother what she thinks Lu! She's not here to see now isn't she? And honestly! Silly? Just because I was rather engaged with other matters and forgot the name and colour of one flower? I would think that you're the silly one, Lucy Goosey!'

Lucy leapt to her feet, mock offended. 'Su! How dare you call me that?' Grinning, Susan stood up gracefully, ruffling Lucy's neatly plaited hair. 'I just did Lucy! So there! And I am Queen Susan Lucy, you best well remember that!' Without warning, she tickled Lucy's side mercilessly, and Lucy was reduced to a laughing mess.

Tears in her eyes from laughing so hard, Lucy pleaded, 'Oh stop stop! Susan, please! I beg for your mercy O Royal Queen! I beg you; cease this endless torture at once!' Susan laughed, a tinkling, musical sound that the Narnians had lived for, and her suitors died for. Ignoring Lucy's shrieks, she continued tickling her sister, her squeals and pleas growing louder and more breathless.

Peter and Edmund were stunned to hear such loud laughter from the gardens. Rushing to see what was going on, they were shocked by the scene before them of Susan unwavering 'torture' of their baby sister. Susan hadn't played with Lucy like that for so long.

Lucy, seeing her brothers, cried out for their help. 'Pete! Ed! Susan's killing me! Oh, do stop her before I die from laughing!' The Pevensie brothers stared at each other before smirking. Perhaps the girls need some 'bonding time'. Bowing regally to Susan and motioning for her to continue, they left, whistling cheerfully as they reentered the house. Maybe there was hope for Susan yet.

Lucy yelled after her retreating brothers' back that she would exact revenge on them before finally collapsing onto the ground, exhausted from Susan's tickling attack. Susan too, flopped down next to Lucy, panting from laughing so hard. For once, she didn't care whether her dress would be wrinkled or stained or whether she was sweating or not. She had fun, and she was far happier than before.

As the sisters' breathing evened, Lucy turned over to face Susan, chin propped up on her hand. 'I thought you forgot about Narnia, Su.'

Looking upwards, Susan stared dreamily at a cloud that was shaped suspiciously like a dancing Faun. 'I didn't. I couldn't ever forget Narnia Lu, no matter how hard I tried.'

Lucy frowned, 'But why would you want to forget? Don't you love Narnia?'

Sighing, Susan looked at Lucy. How innocent she is. Tucking a stray golden hair behind Lucy's ear, she thought out her words carefully. 'Sometimes Lu, remembering is so much more difficult than forgetting. I thought that, if I forgot Narnia, I wouldn't have to remember that I couldn't go back anymore. I wouldn't have to remember everyone we left back home and what we lost.' Absent-mindedly straightening Lucy's collar, she continued, 'I wouldn't have to remember that we might never go back, ever. I don't have your faith Lu, if I did I wouldn't have a problem remembering. Sometimes I wonder if Narnia was ever a dream, a wonderful dream that never really happened.'

Seeing Lucy starting to protest, she gently shushed her. 'But every now and then, I'd catch a glimpse of something golden streaking by through the corner of my eye. I thought I was imagining it then, but then I started seeing it nearly every day, and I knew, somehow, that Aslan was telling me everything was real; that He was real. And everything started coming back. It was all just so fuzzy before; I wasn't sure that they were real. But then, I kept seeing flashes of our lives back there; the balls, the voyages, the battles. I could see us all grown up and regal and real, how could they be just a dream?'

Lucy smiled, understanding. Squeezing her sister's hands, she hugged Susan fiercely, and little tears squeezed through her closed eyelids when she felt her beloved sister hug her back just as fiercely. Finally letting go, she kissed Susan's head solemnly, as they blessed their loyal subjects when they were Kings and Queens. Slowly standing up and straightening her dress, Lucy stared warmly at her sister, eyes wiser and ancient beyond her 16 years. 'Aslan be blessed, Sister mine, for you have returned to us.' And in that moment, Susan could see the Queen Lucy grew to be thousands of years ago, valiant and strong and royal. Inclining her head slightly in a bow, she replied, easily slipping into the formal tongue they used as monarchs of Narnia. 'Aslan be blessed, Valiant Queen, for we four are one once more.'

Suddenly Lucy grinned, seeming a child who had never been a Queen. 'Come on Susan! The Hastings should be nearly here!' Turning, she ran into the house, hair loose from her plaits streaming wildly in the wind, and Susan marveled at the transformation from Queen to child. Shaking her head, she too stood and dusted her dress and followed her sister slowly in.

Hearing a rustle behind her, Susan turned to stare at the huge Lion who was suddenly standing before her. His eyes were kind as He nodded once before padding away, disappearing into the wind. Susan smiled to hear his voice rumbling in the air, 'Well done, Daughter of Eve, dear heart; well done.'

Bowing her head, she whispered, 'Thank you Aslan.' And as her heart sang with joy, Susan reentered the Pevensies home; her footsteps lighter and head held higher as the wayward Queen found herself again.

Once more, the four Kings and Queens of Old were reunited, and laughter rang through the house as the three welcomed Susan back. And outside, in a normal household garden, a pile of leaves rustled and flew up into the air, dancing with joy, and through the warm, crisp air, a lion's roar reverberated, warm and proud. It was done.