I am seven feet, nine inches tall and one-hundred sixty-two pounds. I have blue skin and large emerald eyes. My hair is brown, curly, and short. I do not have fantastic symmetrical markings, but peach, flesh colored patterns with no definite order. I have five fingers on one hand and four on the other, and in addition, my nose slightly resembles a strange mesh of a kitten and a human child. I was not born of this planet, but engineered through science. I am Grace Augustine's only failed experiment.

I cannot speak Na'vi, nor do I fit in with my DNA counterparts, and the same applies to my human family. They live in an atmosphere I cannot thrive in, so I am left somewhere in the middle family and stranger. I do not belong. My original purpose was that of the Avatar program. Alli Norse, I believe her name, was to be the brain, and I, the host. Unfortunately for her, her body could not endure the trip to Pandora, and her spirit left to God, or Eywa, or whatever… I suppose it is a good thing she died. Imagine the embarrassment she would have felt having a deformed avatar who could ultimately think for itself. So, left without a purpose, I was deemed a spectacle; a wonderful, terrible, ingenious science experiment gone wrong.

I was coaxed into attempting to adapt and survive in the wild, but I was 3 things any Na'vi should not be:
1. Clumsy
2. Small
3. Weak…
Oh, incredibly weak. The deformities of having a not-supposed-to-be-there sense of consciousness left me with not only a weak physicality, but a seriously messed up mentality. Courage and integrity were definitely not my strong suit, and a dependency on technology made me wary of abandoning everything I knew and loved to join a savage tribe that might not accept me. For that, I returned to Hell's Gate (after one night in Pandora) to watch the world unfold before my large, unnatural eyes.

I won't go into detail… sometimes thinking about it is simply too painful, but I will say that I saw the rise of Jake Sully, and the fall of the Na'vi's tree. Quarrich asked me straight away where my loyalties lie, and I claimed neutrality, which, in the end, kept me safe from either sides.

I was there when the news of Grace's death surfaced and I witnessed bits of the war between the Na'vi and the humans. Eventually by the time things calmed, I was asked to take a side: either to go back with the humans, or continue my estranged life on Pandora. How living in an oxygen filled planet would work? I didn't know, so I chose the easiest convenience (6 years of cryo was not something I wanted) but not before gathering up as much technology as I could.

I wasn't asked to stay by any of the Na'vi, however. To them, I was just another dumb sky-person. Sure, in their eyes, Eywa loved all, but in their hearts, they did not trust me. Hell they barely even trusted Jake before he took on the role of Toruk Mactow or whatever. Actually, even Jake Sully didn't ask me to stay here on Pandora. I doubt he even knew I existed, much less cared. Oh no, it was Norm and Max. I figured that Norm wanted me here so he could study me in Grace's honor or something, and I'm pretty sure Max was being sincere, although he would also examine me like a dissected frog. My life under a microscope had officially begun. But I allowed my worries to leave me, immersing myself in gratitude that I was somewhat accepted by this sparse society. They were someone I could talk to and interact with. They could share my pain, my happiness, and my abandonment, and at times, I wondered if they could relate. Though through all of this, I didn't completely feel accepted.

So I tried making nice with the Na'vi again, but how was I supposed to befriend someone who couldn't even stand the sight of me? Someone who believed I should have left with the other humans for my ignorance and stupidity? It didn't make an ounce of sense. Also, with everything trying to kill me, how was I supposed to reach more than one Na'vi at a time?! If luck was on my side I would have run into a group, but alas, nothing. I ran into one, stupid Na'vi who didn't even speak english, and that's it. So much for my quest for normalcy. I admit, I cowered back to Hell's Gate with my tail tucked between my legs, but what was I supposed to do? Die by one of those creatures, or die because of miscommunications?

It's apparent that this haven would not keep me safe for long. Hell's Gate would eventually fall and what would I be left with? Nothing but some humans and death. Third time's the charm, I guess. And so, I left, once again, to possibly somehow awaken my Na'vi instincts. We'll just have to see how this goes, I guess. My name is Alina, and this is my strange, messed up reality.