We Cannot Be
Chapter One: Memories
"Go on, Harry! Ask him!" Hermione urged Harry while Ron nodded fervently in agreement. The trio were huddled just beyond the doorway of the living room at The Burrow, where Remus Lupin was engaged in light conversation with Molly and Ginny Weasley.
Harry flapped his hands about as if that could convey the difficulty of what he wanted Remus to tell them, but Hermione just gave him that very Hermione-like look and said, "Sirius left it to you, Harry. You should be the one to ask Remus."
"Hermione," Harry begged, "please, you would be so much more tactful than me-"
"What are you three whispering about?" Mrs Weasley demanded, causing the trio to jump about a foot in the air and emerge, shamefacedly into the living room.
"I uh-" Harry started awkwardly, taking a seat next to Ginny as Hermione and Ron did the same, "-well I, uh…"
"Is something troubling you, Harry?" Remus enquired, his light smile falling into a worried frown.
"Well yes…sort of…" he looked to Hermione for support, she nodded at him determinedly and he took a deep breath, summoning his courage to carry on. "It's just Sirius, he left me this." Harry extended his open palm to Remus, exposing a very delicate platinum ring, embossed with tiny white diamonds. He then took a note from his pocket and passed it to Remus, who took it and read it cautiously.
"What does it say?" Ginny questioned impatiently, as her ex-professor stared at the beautiful ring in Harry's hand.
"You can read it aloud if you want," Harry suggested to Remus, breaking him from his trance.
Remus nodded slowly and cleared his throat.
"Harry,
I want you to give this ring to the person that you love most dearly in this world. If you are reading this note then I have no use for it anymore, and you will be able to use it better than I did. It is a beautiful ring for a beautiful woman, make sure she knows it.
Sirius."
"Oh," was all Ginny managed, falling into the same trance as Remus and staring unblinkingly at the ring.
When it became clear that Harry wasn't going to say anything more, Hermione coughed tentatively and addressed Remus.
"We were wondering, um-well-what use did Sirius have for that ring? It's not as though he was ever married…was he?" She finished uncertainly.
Remus considered the people before him for a while, evidently trying to decide whether he should divulge whatever story came with that ring.
"I'm not sure whether it's really my place to say," he decided eventually, "if Sirius wanted you all to know, he would have told you."
Harry couldn't help but sigh at his old teacher, he always had to be so diplomatic. "But he left me the ring didn't he? Is that not permission enough to tell us what it's all about?"
"Go on, Remus. Just tell them about her," Molly pushed. She could see how hopeful Harry was for some more insight into his godfather's life before prison.
Remus sighed heavily, the apparent weight of the decision pushing against his chest. "Alright, alright. I will tell you, but I warn you that this story does not have a happy ending. Sirius, it seems, was doomed to live a half life."
Harry swallowed hard, trying to prevent the tears that had welled up in his eyes from falling; he nodded his understanding to Remus who took the ring and rolled it over in his fingers a few times before continuing.
"This is the ring that Sirius was going to give to his bride on their wedding day, many, many years ago." The room was still, the tension palpable as Remus explained further. "She was the love of his life, he would have gone to hell and back to make her happy…" he tailed off as his words had become so thick with emotion that he couldn't continue.
"What was her name?" Harry breathed.
"Aurelia Avery," Molly answered, sensing that Remus was not quite ready.
"Avery?" Harry asked harshly. "As in the Averys?"
Remus bowed his head in agreement. "Yes, Harry, the very same Averys that you have had the displeasure of meeting in the Department of Mysteries. But before you jump to any conclusions, allow me to explain – I think it's best that we start at the beginning…"
Sirius watched in amusement as a large, golden haired dog was growling at Lewis Mulciber, a seventh year Slytherin that had set his sights on his owner.
"Stop that right now! Bad dog!" Mrs Avery scolded, making to whack the animal across the head but before she had managed to make contact it whined and shrank back behind the woman's daughter.
Sirius watched Mulciber snarl in the direction of the dog as though it were some foul rodent and march from the school supply store, Mrs Avery following close behind, shrieking apologies.
"Good boy," Aurelia praised, patting her dog gratefully on the head. He wagged his tail happily but was soon distracted by a rather interesting scent and went bounding in the direction of the door, where Sirius was seated on a bench with James Potter and Peter Pettigrew, waiting for Remus to finish examining different sets of quills.
Sirius couldn't help but laugh as the dog leaped up and tried desperately to lick his face.
"Sammy?" Aurelia called, rushing around a bookcase in the direction that Sammy the golden retriever had fled.
"Sammy!" She called again, only this time with a tone of irritation as she pulled him off of the person he was attacking with his affection and glaring at him. "I told you to behave, didn't I?" She scolded. "Mother will make me put you on the lead, and you know how much you hate the lead!"
The dog whimpered in agreement, and decided to settle for simply resting his head on Sirius' knee. Aurelia sighed exasperatedly and, with an apologetic wave at the person Sammy had attached himself to, pulled on his collar to encourage him to leave with her. The dog refused, his head still firmly lodged on the man's knee.
"Sammy! What on earth has gotten into you? Why have you attached yourself to-" Realising that she didn't actually know who the dog had attached itself to, her light blue eyes moved up to the man's face. She froze as she saw him, watching as the look of amusement changed to one of guilt and then, as she continued to stare, anger.
"Sammy," she whispered, breaking Sirius' gaze and looking down at her dog, "I think you're confused, this isn't Reggie," she could feel Sirius' glare on her face, "Come on, lets go."
The dog whined pitifully in response, nuzzling his head against Sirius' hand and staring at his owner in defiance. "Sammy please," Aurelia pleaded, tugging gently on his collar.
"Lia?" A voice called from the doorway. "Lia! There you are! Your mother is raising hell outside looking for you, you better come now before she-" Regulus Black stopped dead in his tracks as he became aware of who his best friend was looking at.
She turned to him with a desperate expression and tilted her head to the dog, "he won't move Reg, make him move?"
"Samuel. Get over here now!" The dog hunched, knowing that he was in trouble by the use of his full name, he slouched over to Regulus and placed a tentative lick on his hand. Regulus couldn't help but crack a smile at his dramatic antics, and ruffled the fur on his head affectionately, "stupid dog, you'd better listen to poor Aurelia or you'll get her in trouble, understand?" The dog barked once and wagged its tail.
"Not going to say hello, Brother?" Sirius drawled in a would-be nonchalant tone but Aurelia could hear the challenge behind his words.
"Why should he?" She cut in quickly as Regulus' face reddened with anger. Sirius' eyes moved to hers sharply, causing an unwanted chill to creep down her spine. "You were the one that left."
Sirius blinked and opened his mouth to respond but before he could, James had drawn his wand and was pointing it at the two Slytherins.
"And it was the best damn decision he'll ever make, disassociating himself with your kind."
"Our kind?" Regulus hissed. Aurelia knew it was dangerous territory when Regulus lowered his voice, and placed a hand on his arm calmingly. "Last time I checked, Potter, you are our kind too."
"You know what I mean," James snapped. Regulus cocked an eyebrow at him as his hand fingered the handle of his wand. It didn't need saying aloud, James was quite clearly implying their association with the 'dark' side.
"Come on Reg, lets just go," Aurelia said quietly, gently tugging on his arm as she had done previously with her dog's collar.
Sirius watched them leave with a foul taste in his mouth. He turned to his friends and noticed how irritated James looked, he couldn't help but smile slightly, it was nice that he cared enough to threaten his brother to back off. Peter, on realising the shift in tension, smirked wickedly and decided to impart some valuable wisdom to the pair, "Avery's a bitch but Merlin is she fit!"
James looked at him like he must be mentally disturbed to find a Slytherin attractive but Sirius found himself cracking up and patted Peter on the back appreciatively.
"What?" Peter asked in response to James' incredulous stare. "She is! Cracking pair of tits, like."
James watched as his best friend stared over to the Slytherin House table at the welcoming feast. He couldn't work out what he was thinking but assumed it must be something to do with his brother as his eyes had been fixed in the other Black's direction for the past ten minutes.
"Don't worry about it mate, you're better off without him."
Sirius tilted his head in James' direction, acknowledging that he'd heard him, but didn't move his eyes away from the Slytherins.
"Do you miss him?" James asked quietly, following his line of vision to where Regulus was laughing as he held a plate of pancakes slightly too far out of reach of an impatient Aurelia.
"It doesn't matter," Sirius grumbled eventually. Allowing himself to return to the memory he had been enjoying.
Sirius crept towards a little end table in the formal dining room at his home in Grimmauld Place. He could hear the quiet giggles of the young girl that was hiding from his brother as they played hide and seek.
"You're not very subtle," he whispered as he lifted up the tablecloth and squeezed under the table with her, his back pressed up against the wall.
Aurelia stuck her tongue out playfully. "You wouldn't have known I was here if you hadn't heard me laughing," she pointed out.
He shook his head and laughed silently, pulling her closer to him and therefore farther from the edge of the table. "I could see your socks poking out."
"Oh," she giggled, pressing her mouth into his shoulder as they heard Regulus run past the dining room and further into the house. "Will you hide me? Reggie says I'll have to help the elves in the kitchen if he finds me in the first five minutes!"
Sirius grinned and wound his arm around her protectively, titling her head further into his chest as her giggles returned with the soft padding of his brother's footsteps.
"Stick with me, kid, I'll keep you safe." Aurelia grinned and nuzzled her nose into his neck affectionately.
It was stupid, he knew it was stupid. Sirius Black: the blood traitor should not be clinging onto memories of the games he used to play with Aurelia Avery when they were little. Yet try as he might, he just wasn't ready to forget. Some part of Aurelia still had a distinct hold on him, he was just glad that she didn't know it.
"This is going to be a long year." He sighed heavily, but forced himself to look away and grabbed a muffin, taking a gigantic bite from it in an attempt to cheer up.
A/N: Hello lovely readers! If you've got to this point then thank you so much for completing the first chapter. Please follow/favourite and review, I'd love to know whether you think this story is worth continuing!
