A/N: I had taken this down like pretty quickly after posting it but because GorgeousSmile said I should finish it, I'm going too. Warning: This is Mark/Joanne to start but the next chapter will be strictly Maureen/Joanne.

"We'll use it tonight. You can use it on me then I'll use it on you." Maureen said grinning at the idea as she shifted the phone, eyeing the new strap on that Mimi had somehow gotten for Joanne and her.

"But…" Joanne bit her lip, sighing heavily, "Alright. Fine. I'll see you after work. Love you." She said, hanging up before anything else could be spoken. She couldn't help but frown, slightly worried about this whole sex toy ordeal.

She had never used them. She had never been with a man. That was the scary part and something she did not ever want to reveal to Maureen. The thought to call someone for help, one of the guy friends in the group was tempting but that was… embarrassing, to say the least. She cursed herself mentally for agreeing with Maureen that they could experiment.

Deciding to leave work early, like six hours way to early, she headed to the loft, thankful to find Mark there. "What's up, Joanne?" The blonde filmmaker asked, letting his ex-girlfriend's, girlfriend in.

"Uh… I need a little help." She told him, slipping her coat off. "And I know this is going to be like super weird for both of us but… you're the only one I thought that would really help me with this." She said rather quickly, biting her lip once she had finally shut up.

Mark got that funny look of confusion as he stepped towards the lawyer. "Oh, um, okay. What is it?" He questioned slowly, slightly scared to find out what she, Joanne Jefferson of all the people in the world, needed help with.

"I need to have sex with a guy." She blurted out without a second thought.

Mark's jaw dropped to the floor practically at the words. "You need to what?! Why?!" He demanded in shock and surprise.

"Becaaussee! Mimi gave Maureen this silly sex toy, a strap or something, I don't know but whatever, I've never, um…" She cut off, blushing from here to tomorrow, her eyes averting to the floor.
"You've never been with a guy." He finished for her with a smirk, pausing a brief moment before continuing. "And you don't want Maureen to know, not to mention the fact you don't know what it feels like or anything." He said.

Joanne bit her lip, slowly nodding. "Er… that about sums it up in a nutshell." She mumbled, rubbing the back of neck. "Kind of crazy, huh?" She asked quietly.

Mark smirked. "Just a little." He mumbled.

"Mark, I'm freaking out over this and she's determined to have us this toy." She stated, looking up at him a moment. "She just assumes I've been with a guy but hated it and turned lesbian." She told him.

"Tell her the truth." He said, walking into his bedroom with Joanne trailing after him.

"I can't just do that. Mark, you have to help me with this." She begged. "Come on, please?" She questioned, biting her lip.

Mark shook his head. "No, Joanne. You're with Maureen. Just tell her the truth or say you don't want too. I'm not going to have sex with my ex-girlfriend's current girlfriend." He stated, looking at the lawyer as if she was insane for even suggesting this.

She rolled her eyes with a heavy sigh. "Wow. A girl is willing to get into bed with you and you turn her down. Wow. No wonder you haven't gotten laid in a while. This was your chance." She said, walking out of the room and to the door.

He heard her words and groaned. "Joanne! Wait!" He called, going after her. "Fine, I'll help you this once but no one finds out about this. Besides, Maureen would never let you live it down if she found out you were a virgin. I mean, she didn't to me for about six months until she found something new to tease me about." He told her, frowning. "You better not tell anyone I told you that. I don't need the gang knowing that Maureen was my first." He mumbled, taking Joanne's hand, leading her into the bedroom.

"Secrets safe with me." She said following after him.

"Hold on a second." He stated, leaving her there only to walk into Roger's room only to search for an unopened condom. He left the rockers shit-hole of a room and went back into his, closing the door, his gaze shifting up when he saw a now nude Joanne slide into his bed. Automatic hard on.

Joanne was freaking out about this but she preferred to freak out with Mark then have it be Maureen. She looked up at him when he walked into his room, her eyes shifting down to his erection growing in his pants. Erection problem? No way, she wouldn't have guessed. She cleared her throat. "Are you, um, just going to stand there?" She asked, curiously.

"Huh? Oh, no." He replied, slipping out of his clothes, covering himself slightly as he walked over and sat down before slipping the condom on, swallowing hard. He moved under the blanket and positioned himself on top of Joanne. "Just relax." He told her, lowering his mouth to her neck whilst his hand crept up her inner thigh, waiting no time figuring the sooner this was over, the better.

"What are you doing?" She asked quietly, her breathing catching in her throat as his fingers invaded her. She moved her hands up and down his arms.

"Helps if you're wet." Mark whispered in her ear, his fingers slowly moving in and out of her until he was sure she was wet enough for this. "Ready?" He asked, curiously, bringing her one leg a bit as he pressed the tip of his member to her.

Joanne felt that and bit her lip, hard. She honestly wasn't ready for this. "R—ready." She mumbled quietly, her eyes clenching tight as her body tensed with the sudden intrusion of him entering her. She honestly felt as if she had stopped breathing at this point.

"You okay?" He asked nervously, looking at her.

"I—I don't… know…" She somehow managed, a tear sliding down her cheek. "It… hurts." She whimpered.

Mark wiped the tear away. "You'll get used to it. Just give it a few minutes." He said gently, not really wanting to hurt Joanne at this point. He felt bad. He slowly began to move in and out of her; able to see why she didn't want Maureen to see this side of her then again, Joanne was never one to be openly weak.

Eventually, Joanne felt her muscles relax around him, feeling some enjoyment coming out of this and could tell Mark was enjoying it. After twenty minutes or so, Mark collapsed on top of Joanne, both of their breathing labored.

"That was…" She cut off, unable to speak, seeing Mark's look. She smirked and placed a small kiss on his lips, "Really good." She finished.

Mark could only smile. "That was." He said, pulling out of her slowly, removing the condom. "You should probably get going now though. Roger will be home soon." He told her, placing a kiss on her forehead.

"Right. Maureen will call the office at lunch." She stated, biting her lip, moving to her feet only to get dressed, her legs feeling like jello at this moment.

Mark watched her a moment before snapping out of his reality, getting dressed as well, escorting Joanne to the door. "And this stays between us and the next time I need a favor. I'm coming to you." He stated.

Joanne smirked. "Technically, this is payback for me helping you get a job at Buzzline." She said, winking at him. "But yeah, if you need anything. Call and thanks again." She added, placing a kiss on his lips before heading out of the building, heading back to work, feeling slightly more confident about this whole sex toy thing. She figured deep down she was going to admit her little affair to the drama queen though. She could almost hear the word 'threesome' coming from Maureen's lips.

-Fin.

Next chapter: Maureen/Joanne, promise. Joanne is not going to secreatly fall for Mark so don't worry.