A/N Not my characters or settings.

OOOO

Harry added the final touches to the letter, sealed it tightly in an enchanted envelope, and placed it on his best mate's bed. "Excellent," he murmured. "The final pieces are falling into place."

Just then there was a knock on his room's door, and a certain bushy-haired mudblood bounded into the room. "Harry! I received your message from Dobby and came as quick as I could! What is the emergency?"

Harry could hardly keep from chuckling as this part of his plan was about to come to fruition. Hermione was disturbed by the look that crossed his face. "Harry, what is it?"

His smile disappeared abruptly. "Hermione, as you know, Dumbledore will be sending me back to the Dursley's at the end of the term. What you don't know, however, is that I have decided not to go back there." He unbuttoned the shirt he was wearing and exposed his chest. In deep scars was written 'Harry is a freak!!'

"Oh Merlin!" Hermione gasped. "They did that to you?"

"Yes," Harry chuckled. "Duddly cut that into my chest with a rusty switchblade two weeks before I returned to Hogwarts while his parents watched and laughed. Remember how I had to spend a week in the infirmary when I came here? That was for tetanus. I've decided not to return there."

"But Harry, Dumbledore must have a good reason for sending you there, he knows what he's doing, you really should listen to him!" implored his friend. Hermione could not stand the idea that an authority figure could not be trusted.

"No, not this time," he said darkly. "There's something else you should know, Hermione, that you don't know. I've learned to bend time and space. I'm going to change some things. You should also know, my dear Hermione, that I am deeply in love with you."

Hermione was speechless, and Harry embraced her in a tight hug. The two disappeared from the room. Ron came in shortly afterwards and saw the envelope on his bed. "Oh, a letter for me, how nice!" He picked up the envelope and opened it.

OOOO

Harry and Hermione appeared in England, 1979, by a large tree where a couple was sitting. Hermione immediately noticed the family resemblance between Harry and the man and woman by the tree. The couple was disturbed from their moment by the sudden appearance of the wizard and witch and jumped to their feet.

"Who the bloody hell are you!" demanded James Potter.

"Avada Kedavra!" replied Harry with his wand, and James Potter fell dead.

"JAMES!" shrieked Lilly Potter, rushing to her husband's side.

"Avada Kedavra!" said Harry again, and his mother collapsed onto his father. "I won't have a ruined life now!" And then Harry vanished.

Hermione, utterly horrified by what she saw, disappeared as well, since Harry never existed to send her back in time. But since Harry had never existed, and hence could not go back in time to kill his parents, they suddenly sprung to life and returned to their tree.

But since they had returned to life, Harry could have been born, and thus moments later, Harry and Hermione appeared from thin air, and Harry murdered his parents again.

OOOO

As this cycle was happening, Ron tried his best to read the letter.

"Dear Ron,

The letter disappeared, since Harry had never written it, and in fact Ron was now in Azkaban. He remembered that Voldemort had taken over all of Britain and that he was now scheduled to be executed for his role as resistance leader against the dark wizard. Ron wondered for just a moment why he was holding his hands outstretched as though he were reading a letter.

But within moments, the timeline found that since Harry had never existed, he couldn't go back in time to kill his own parents, they were now alive, thus he had been born and Voldemort had not taken over England, and Ron found himself returned to Hogwarts, remembering nothing.

"I have grown tired of this mortal coil.

Ron suddenly appeared in Azkaban again. There was a tapping at the wall near his window. He shook himself from his confusion and went to answer when he reappeared in Hogwarts, reading a letter from his best mate.

"I have decided to end not just my life, but all existence, as I know it.

Ron finished the sentence, scratched his head in confusion, and then disappeared. He looked up at the barred windows and then lifted himself up to see outside his cell. There hovered Lavender Brown on a broom. "Love," she whispered harshly. "I've come to get you out –"

Her words were cut off as they both vanished.

"I suspect that existence will not simply cease to exist. No, my nemesis Reality is a hardy foe

Ron felt a little strange as he was reading the letter, as though he was forgetting something important.

Lavender was attempting to cut the bars with a cutting curse. "They're spelled against that!" Ron whispered fiercely. "What the hell are you doing here anyway!? You have to go before they find you!"

"There's no Resistance without you!" she nearly yelled back at him. "And I can't go on without you, Won-won!"

"Merlin, is there no talking sense into you! They'll catch – "

"But I think I can at least ruin the lives of a number of people

Ron was interrupted from his reading when Neville Longbottom walked into the dorm room. "Hi Ron!" He said.

"Uh, hey Neville."

Neville spied an envelope lying on his bed. "What's this?" he asked. "It looks like Harry's handwriting." He opened the envelope and pulled out a letter.

"who have been especially cruel to me

"- you! For Merlin's sake, get away from here!"

Lavender was too intent on transfiguring her wand into a diamond-toothed saw to pay attention to Ron's warnings. As she began to cut through the bars, she could have noticed Ron's wide eyes, which would have warned her to the pack of dementors floating slowly toward her, but she did not.

And it was just as well because they all vanished.

"You never knew this, but I spent my entire childhood, and the summers being abused by those simpering muggles Dumbledore sent me to. I think I've set things so that Voldemort has Deatheaters flay the skin from their bones for all eternity.

Ron was getting a little worried about what Harry was writing to him. But he vanished again.

He was now watching as the love of his life was having the soul sucked from her body. Her wand slid through the bars into his cell, and faintly, Ron felt hope.

"But they're really just the first. Take Snape, for instance, he received a letter from me this morning that was actually a portkey into the sun. Did you know that I have the power to bend time and space?

"Expecto Patronous!" shouted Ron. A silvery figure, that of his true friend Neville Longbottom, killed in the first purge of blood traitors, appeared and fought off the dementors. It was too late for Lavender, whose soulless corpse fell from her broom and plunged into the icy depths of the moat surrounding Azkaban. She had managed enough of a hole for Ron's malnourished form to slip through. Her broom still hovered there, somehow enchanted to ignore the anti-flight wards on the prison. He blinked out of existence.

"You may notice myself and Hermione are in the room

Ron looked up and noticed his two friends in a hug in the middle of the room. When did they get here? He wondered. Then they vanished.

"Or you may not. Hermione has been trying to manipulate and control me from the first moment I met her. Despite that, I deeply love her. So I have thrown us both into a causality loop so that we'll be together for eternity.

Ron clutched the broom tightly, fighting back the tears of seeing his lover die, and flew as fast as he could away from Azkaban. He would escape, he would find Voldemort and kill that bastard again and again and again –

"Dumbledore I murdered this morning with some poisoned lemon drops. I wish I could have made him suffer more, but I needed to finish some letters before he was discovered and I could be caught

A stinging hex narrowly missed him, and Ron turned to see a number of Deatheaters flying after him. "Bloody hell!"

"Which is where we are at now

Ron looked up from the letter. Neville was no longer in the room. When had that happened?

"Ron, you've been a true prat to me and a failure as a human being

Ron gulped as he read those words, and then blinked out of existence.

He dodged a massive cutting curse, and fired back several killing curses. One found its mark, and the bastard died instantly. Ron only wished he could have made him suffer.

"You've whined and cheated your way through everything. You never trusted me, but instead undermined me at every turn to make up for your own lack of self-worth

It was a Crucio that finally brought Ron down. He had felt them before, many times, in fact, but this bastard was especially talented, and Ron was weak. The agonizing pain caused him to slip from the broom, and he plummeted

"So when you've finished reading this letter, you'll find that it's a portkey

Ron dropped the letter as if it were a snake. "Harry must finally have gone around the bend! Well, if I don't finish the letter, I won't be portkey'd anywhere. Got you now, don't I Harry?" Ron smiled to himself. In this chess game, Ron was the winner.

Suddenly Ginny burst into the room. "Ron! Ron! Dumbledore's been found dead, they think its poison! And Snape has just disappeared entirely! Hey, what's this letter?"

She picked up the letter and read it out loud, "You'll find that it's a portkey. I hope you enjoy my revenge. Yours, Harry."

"Noooo!" screamed Ron, as he dove for his sister. But it was too late, and she and the letter vanished. "Bloody, blustering, bollocks! How am I going to explain this to mom?"

Suddenly Hogwarts was rocked by an explosion. "The Deatheaters are here already!" He cursed again. Harry and Hermione reappeared in the room and then vanished just as quickly. Ron didn't notice, he was too busy, rushing for the stairwell to try and gather as many of the DA as he could to organize some kind of resistance against the Dark Lord.

Ron disappeared then, and found himself dead from a combination of a Crucio curse and a very long fall to the hard ground.

OOOO

Ginny found herself in a pretty pink room, sitting at a table set for tea. Luna was sitting across from her. "You're not supposed to be here," said Luna, although her voice was without any sort of surprise.

"Luna?!" Ginny was quite surprised, and made up for the absence in Luna. "Where am I? Why are you here?"

Luna smiled at her friend. "Why I'm here to torment Ron, of course. You wouldn't know this though, since Harry was very secretive about it. Harry used his powers to bend time and space to create a negative time realm where I was to have tea with your brother for all eternity."

Ginny scrunched up her face in confusion. "Why on earth would he want to do that?"

"Oh Harry was quite cross with your brother and set about so that he would be tortured forever. Harry thought that since Ron didn't like girly things, and thought I was crazy, that he should spend some time with me. Harry lost his mind, I think. I'm glad he liked me enough to keep me safe in this nice room, which is enchanted to provide tea and pudding whenever I like. He also gave me access to every back issue of The Quibbler and even issues from alternate futures and alternate pasts. There's actually infinite knowledge in them, so I think I should be very well busy for eternity. That is when I'm not supposed to torment your brother."

Ginny blinked. "So I was sent here instead of Ron?"

"I guess you got to the portkey before Ronald did. It might be good for you both, actually. You'll make much better company, and I think that left in real time you might have gotten hurt, or worse. Tea?"

Ginny nodded and helped herself to a cup. "How do I get out of here?"

"There's no way I could find. I suspect Harry is the only one who could free us, but he's quite mad, so I don't expect he'll be able to."

Ginny found that drinking tea with her friend forever wasn't all that bad.

OOOO

Neville found himself inside what appeared to be a large mansion. He was holding an unread letter in his hand. A house-elf scurried up to him. "Master Longbottom! You're here!"

"Huh?" said Neville.

"Oh, Harry Potter said you might be confused on your arrival. He said to tell you to read the letter first. Shall I draw you a bath, Master?"

"Uh, sure," said Neville, glad to get the house-elf away from him. He looked at the letter.

Dear Neville,

You've been a true friend to me during my time at Hogwarts. You stood by me during some of the worst moments of my life. So to reward you, I've done the following:

I have created an island in space that is outside the influence of time. You will never age here.

I have assembled a fine mansion with staff for you. Your every need will be fulfilled forever. It has a full library, green house, and dueling room so that you will never find yourself bored, and you can discover all sorts of wondrous magic. Perhaps, if you so desire, you will find a way out of your current predicament. Not that I hope you wish to, but I wanted to give you every option.

Tonks has agreed to be your mistress. Since she can change her appearance, I decided she would be best for you as you could change her to suit your taste. She was happy to do this, as she thinks you are cute, and she wanted to avoid the things I decided to set in motion.

You may be wondering how I did this. Well, I discovered at the beginning of the

term that I have the power to bend time and space. After years of abuse, neglect, and manipulations, I decided that I had lost my mind. Thus I have taken great revenge on my enemies, and given great gifts to my friends. I have gone back in time to kill my parents, who were evil enough to have birthed me into this ugly world. I theorize that this has created a causality loop that will leave me stuck forever killing my parents and in turn ceasing to exist.

It seemed better than the alternative of living, and also had the advantage of being tamper-proof as Dumbledore himself could not intervene. Don't worry though, since you are not a part of the normal time stream, you will be unaffected by what happens to me. Enjoy eternity.

Your Friend,

Harry Potter

The house-elf reappeared, and Neville followed him to the drawn bath. Inside the Jacuzzi sized tub, Tonks was waiting for him. Neville found he was quite happy to have known Harry Potter.