Authors Note: Ok, this is the first time I'm doing this, and I'm going to try to keep this from becoming a Mary-Sue blood-bath so bear with me! Especially second chapter. Reviews will be appreciated!

I know the lyrics of the opening theme. The chapter titles are just my own perverted form of them...

This is going to take us past third impact. In fact, it's going to skip everything up to that point, so just assume everything followed the anime up to the end of End of EVA. It'll also skip from past to present and back too, and the past is just to introduce the new character so if you want to skip it, whatever. I'm sure about everything except the third impact dates.

Once again dates might be incorrect. Please tell me the corrections if known

Now, I must find my angsty center... [Sits in lotus position oohhhmmmmnnnnn... Suddenly black emo-hair grows out of the authors head!

I'm ready.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything!

Ch 1: Young boy, your legend has invoked an angel's cruelty.

January 2016

Remnants of Tokyo-3, Shore of the Sea of LCL

Why... Why me...Why YOU?

On a beach, a lone boy of nearly fifteen years straddled a nubile red-head with a bandaged left eye, and a bandaged right arm. He smelled like blood. She smelled like, nothing. He was dressed in the clothes of a student, she in the red suit of the greatest warriors of the time.

The moment was the pinnacle of human instrumentality. Having failed to become a god, the spawn of the Adam and Lilith was reduced to this; a floating pile of primordial soup, a broken teenage girl, and a shattered teenage boy. Yahweh had left His flock in disgust, uttering His farewell message to an adolescent through the lips of a girl who had been raped, violated, and eaten, and still wasn't granted the peace of death or the mercy of the rest of her race. All of which totaled one.

"How disgusting."

In his place, He left demented a man-child who epitomized the choice of his children.

God was in his heaven, all was right with the world.

The absolute law of the universe dictated that all things that have must come to an end. A universe created by the Alpha and Omega. One, that had millions of other types of beings that all deserved his attention more than the orange fluid that filled the horizon, more than the giant, broken body of a girl who was only one of two without sin in the world. For their virtue, they had been punished. The first lost a son to save a world of unworthy; the other lost herself, her one chance at happiness, and the very humanity she was trying so hard to protect.

Man didn't care for either sacrifice. They didn't need them.

Now, abandoned by that which gave them life, Man had no reason to fear his laws. For Mankind there should have only been one law of the universe now.

Survive.

And still; forsaken by the one thing that protected them, with their population reduced to a lonely couple on a lonely beach, with their savior in pieces scattered across their home like a bleeding porcelain doll, and with all the forces of nature in their almighty fury now arrayed against them, they still sought to kill each other.

Humanity at its greatest.

Hence, Shinji Ikari wiped his eyes and proceeded to choke the only hope for the continuation of his race. Fittingly, the new god of mankind thought nothing of this, only of the one of the most basic of human emotions: revenge.

YOU! It was your entire fault! YOU drove me insane, YOU betrayed me, YOU made me hate myself! YOU...YOU...YOU!!!

I came back because of you...

I loved you.

I loved him.

I loved her. I lost her, and came to you; and you said nothing, did nothing. I tried to speak with you; I gave what you wanted, my attraction was all too easy, and I know you saw.

Gendo's son thought back to his visit to the hospital. It was there that everything went to hell. He had been broken by Ayanami, and shattered by Kawrou. He had held himself together only by his lingering love and regret for the former, and by his respect and care for the latter.

But when he saw that his tree, his castle, his Zion had crumbled; he fell apart. Only then had he failed. Not duty, nor honor, nor even love was able to withstand that final blow. Thus, Shinji Ikari the boy died, and Shinji Ikari the man was born. But, forged in the fire of self-loathing, the sword had come out bent, broken, and gnarled. The savior of Earth, hero of the ostracized, the future god of man had given into his lust and for that moment, tore himself from his patronage; humanity.

And still you did nothing... and because you did nothing, I let THIS happen. Disgust? That's all you feel?

"Damn straight." He muttered.

Shinji began to squeeze. With a very human cry, and tears that were even more so, Shinji Ikari accepted the changing of the guard and killed Asuka Langley Soryu. For the first time Shinji stared into the eyes of something that he killed. They matched his own.

He carried the lifeless body to a broken building that formed a ledge that pointed over the sea, and dropped the body into the sea. It floated for a moment, and then sunk back into the liquid. Shinji looked at the disappearing wake for only one moment, and then looked out to the bleak horizon. Rei, no Lilith's head stared back at him, a smile plastered on her face. There were massive Eva-like beings skewered on giant sticks lodged in the sea bed. He could still see them. Shinji was reminded of the Christian Crucifix. He cocked his head and snorted, a haunted look in his eyes. He knew that others would return, though when, he did not know. Nor, did he care.

Lilith's face split in half again, and this time a scream issued from the gap. But it wasn't the scream of third impact. The scream sounded familiar, though Shinji had never heard in his life, it clutched at his heart. The scream wasn't a shrill vocalization; instead, it was the said sound of a girl crying out in pain. The sound of innocence suffering, the voice belonged someone close, unknowingly close.

"Ayanami-Chan..." Shinji whispered the last syllable like a child trying out his first nickname by himself, shyly liking the sound, but afraid others would hear how much he liked it. He had had his wish fulfilled; to speak with her one last time, and all he had done was yell at her, then he reasoned with her, but never talked to her. She had shown him himself and he didn't like what he saw. Her lap had been so soft...

Regret filled him; that he never got to call her that. That he never got to return the favor of "Ikari-kun".And suddenly, the tears that hadn't come for three days spilled out. The grief was like nothing Shinji had experienced. It brought him together, and broke him again. So powerful were the shudders through his body; that his knees gave out and he was brought down on all fours. Like a worshiper at a temple, the first one, the new God was humbled before yet another human emotion.

And through all the mind numbing grief finally being expressed, Shinji Ikari found that he was enjoying it. The tears felt like a shower, with each shudder, each wracking sob he felt a little cleaner despite the LCL matted on his hair and clothes. And soon, laughs mixed with the sobs with more of the latter. It was sickening, yet calming thing at the same time. Pure, but wrong.

It was then, that he finally understood. In his grief induced stupor, he managed to form a coherent thought.

Thank you, Rei Ayanami, thank you for showing me myself, for showing me the truth. I understand now. My choices are my own. I must live with them. It's a pity it all came too late. It's a pity I had to destroy mankind to see it. I wish I could see you again.

Auska had been a crutch up until this point. But she had helped him none the less. And like Rei, he had cruelly tossed her aside.

He cried/laughed until his arms gave out, he didn't even try to cushion the blow of his face against the concrete, he just cried more, until the tears formed a stream across the smooth wall. He cried until he passed out from exhaustion.

In his unconscious mind, an image of him standing and Asuka sitting side by side on the shore looking at Lilith's sinking face flashed.

Maybe I should try and find her body.

The heart of Lilith

In her mind's eye, Rei saw everything. She was naked, bathed in celestial brightness. She simply floated in the light. She looked at the source of the light above her, and a scowl crossed her face, but she hid it before anyone saw. Not that there was anyone to see it.

Not that she could hid it from those that lived here.

Underneath her, were many bright balls of light with trails floating behind them. They looked like schools of fish she thought, or more like sperm. Like life ready to take root. The souls of mankind began to make their choices. Rei Ayanami was stuck with guide duty.

She placed her hand at her heart, as if trying to feel the muscle itself.

Our connection is still strong... and all that has come of it is pain. Ikari-kun is broken, yet I do not know why. I find I do not know many things lately. Why is he so saddened? Has he not received that of which he desires? Why am I so saddened? Have we not given to humanity what they desired?

Ikari-kun... Why do I call him by the familiar? I cannot remember. Why do I feel attached to him? To one who can never return the sentiment? Is it not the basic instinct of life to protect one's self from harm?

"No..." she whispered to herself.

He is saddened because he now bears the burden of humanity's sadness. He chose for them, not for himself. His desire was to give them theirs, not his own. Then why did he not choose instrumentality? Because he loved them, he loved them so much that he knew it would be and affront to their soul, to the mother herself if kept in such a... artificial state of being.

Yes, that is the term, artificial. For all its peace and unity instrumentality is simply that... artificial. It is an artificial sentiment of good-will, created by man; trying to become an artificial God.

And that is why I am so saddened; because I am the arch-angel of that artificiality. I am an artificial human, carrying the dreams of my creators, and none of my own. Now that Ikari-kun has crushed those dreams, what do I have left?

Nothing.

I have nothing.

I exist with no purpose, and therefore have no reason to exist at all. But I am trapped. I am trapped and he is broken. We shall have no rest.

Rei began to shed tears. No sobbing, nothing to give of the notion that she was crying, not even on her face; just flowing tears.In fact, the angel didn't even notice them.

A tear fell into the mass of souls under her. Their actions became frenzied.

A/N: Ramble time! OK, now you're probably all wondering: what's with the "new god of humanity" stuff? Well the way I see it, God had abandoned man, or at least stopped caring, after second impact. The shift has gone from interloper, to judge when dead. Other than that, it's "let the idiots down there do what they want, and let them pay hell once they get up here." In other words, the philosophy has gone from all things happen for a reason to, the universe is against us; we're on our own, yada, yada, yada.

Shinji decided to reject the new state of being that was presented to mankind, therefore it's now his responsibility to guide the world. Once folks start coming back, (namely the kids) he will share the responsibility a little, but the burden will still be too much for them to bear. That's where all the angst and drama and all that goodness comes into play.

The image in Shinji's mind was just a nod toward the cover-art on one of the boxes of the movie; it has nothing to do with the plot.

Please, please Read and Review! Even failure's not worse than abandonment! On that note, I'm looking for a pre-reader too.