Another Time, Another Place

Continuation to Back in the Day

Fiona had big plans and none of them involved a baby. She thought her life was meant for something more than cooking and cleaning and looking after little ones. She knew it was noble to want those things, she had seen how hard her own mother worked at raising her family, but it wasn't the life she desired for herself. Fiona wanted to continue to fight alongside her father and with her brothers; she wanted to continue making a difference for her people. Her father always said, "Fiona, there's a difference between livin and livin free." She believed those words with all of her heart, it's what she had been taught at the knee of her father, he had been saying it for years, as far back as she could remember.

Fiona had always known she wasn't like other girls, she was different. She thought differently, acted differently, and was moved by different things than most girls she had ever known. Fiona felt very strongly about being able to fight for the IRA, she knew she would never be satisfied staying at home being a wife, a homemaker, and a mother. Most of the girls she grew up with already wanted to find a man to settle down with and start a family of their own. That was the furthest thing from Fiona's mind. She felt like she was far too young and had so much more to contribute to the world than being tied down to one place making babies. Freedom fighting was in her blood, she had a taste for it, she knew her talents were valuable and she could make a difference if she just had more time… more time without the baby.

Fiona lie in her bed thinking about the life that was growing inside of her. She imagined her father would be disappointed in her for being so careless, he had taught her better than falling prey to the life altering mistake she had made. "Why did I ever walk into his hotel room that night?" She wondered silently to herself as she tried to erase the images from her mind of what had happened to her.

Fiona knew there were things that girls could do when they got in trouble in a family way, but she didn't think it was something she could live with. She rubbed her slightly swollen stomach. "It's not yer fault little one, no matter how ye was brought into this world, but I just don't think I can be keepin ye when I have no want to be a ma yet." Fiona hardly ever cried, but the tears of her troubles overwhelmed her that morning. She didn't know what she was going to do, but she would have to make a decision soon. Either she would have to tell her parents and give up the life that she loved, or she would go away, have the baby, and give it up for adoption.

Any answer was far from perfect, and any decision she made would undoubtedly bring her immeasurable pain. If she gave the baby away, a piece of her would always be wandering around in the world unnaturally disconnected from her, and she knew she would never feel complete again. If she kept the baby, a piece of her soul would die too because she would be denying her true calling, fighting for the freedoms of her people. It's what she was born to do, and either decision would leave her heart broken. What she had to figure out now, and soon, is which path of brokenness was she willing to walk down.

"Fiona…FIONA! What's taken ye so long? Get in here and eat yer breakfast!" Fiona quickly wiped the tears from her eyes, "I'm comin ma quit yer hollering at me, I'll be there in just a minute!" Fiona washed her face and put a sweater on over her clothes, then headed for the kitchen. "I've never known ye to be sleepin so late Fiona, are you feeling alright?" Fiona didn't answer her mother. "Are ye under the weather girl?" Fiona could only offer her silence. "Go on now, take the weight off yer legs and eat yer breakfast. Yer brothers and sister are already doin their chores and I'm ready to clean up this mess so quit yer stragglin."

"I'm sorry ma, I'm…I'm just tired I guess."

"Well I saved some food for ye, eat up before it cools off completely."

Fiona stared at her plate for a moment, she knew if she were to take even one bite of anything her mother had served her it would come right back up. Normally she would devour the food her mom put before her, she thought her mother was the best cook for miles around, but today just the smell of it alone was making her turn green.

"Fiona what's wrong with ye, ye look green, is your stomach bothering ye?" Her mother felt her forehead. "Do ye have a fever girl?"

"I just have an upset stomach, ma, maybe a touch of the flu."

"Well back to bed with ye Fiona, I don't want ye getting us all sick. I'll take your temperature and then bring ye some tea."

"Thanks ma, I think I will go lie down for a bit." Fiona didn't feel like working on the farm today and was grateful her mother put her to bed, she preferred guns and ammo to pigs and chickens any day of the week, but even if she did have the opportunity to shoot today she didn't think she would feel up to it. Fiona closed her eyes and before she knew it her mother was waking her up to bring her some lunch.

Fiona had been dreaming of when she was a little girl, they lived over a pub for a short time when she was a young child. Their family was nestled tightly together in a two room flat where her mother did everything she could to look after the children in such a small space. Her father ran the establishment, but he used it to conduct most of his other business as well. Fiona's older brothers would often sit with their father listening as the men talked frequently of the "English sons of Bitches."

Fiona would often tiptoe to the top of the stairs and sit and listen to the music and the conversation playing below her when her mother thought she was sound asleep. Her mother tried hard to keep her away from her father's business and anytime she would catch Fiona slinking off to spy she would get a thrashing from her mother's favorite wooden spoon, but to Fiona the consequences were always worth it. It never seemed to deter her from having her own way.

Fiona had a habit of pushing the boundaries, something her father always seemed to get a kick out of, and her mother despised; Fiona's mother didn't think it was proper for a young lady to hear the things that were talked about in such a setting. Fiona was always drawn to the feral side of things, even when she was a child she had a wildness in her spirit that could not be tamed. Fiona could always feel the charge of electricity in the air as the smell of tobacco would rise to the top of the stairs where she sat quietly in her night clothes and her long braided hair. She would hang on every word her father spoke. He often talked of Independence and freedom and what the men of Ireland must do to obtain it. She didn't understand everything he said at the time, but she knew it must be of great consequence. One thing she was sure of was that her father was as hard as nails. Fiona had watched him get beat by English soldiers for his outspoken beliefs on more than one occasion. She knew his life brought with it great danger, but somehow she wasn't afraid. Her father once came up with a code to help protect her when things got bad. If he ever told her, "Time to be brave, little angel!" she knew what it really meant was, Get down on the floor, close her eyes, and start praying till it was over. She was dreaming of the time she was down on her knees covering her head like her father had taught her to do as the furniture was being knocked about all around her. Suddenly, she woke up to the sound of her mother's voice.

"Ye been sleepin for hour's darlin; I thought ye should have some soup. Maybe it will settle yer aches and I brought ye some soda bread too." Fiona yawned like a sleepy cat and slowly opened her eyes. She thought her mom was as pretty as an angel especially when she smiled at her like that. Her mom helped her sit up and when she was fully awake she realized how truly hungry she was. "Thanks ma, it smells delicious. "

"Usually a good sleep and some hot soup can cure all that ails ye, just holler if ye need anything else darlin."

Fiona desperately wanted to tell her mother what was really going on, but she just couldn't find the words at least not yet. She didn't know what she was waiting for, but she would wait a little bit longer before she told the family about her condition.

Fiona's stomach was beginning to make angry noises from the lack of food. When the soup was cool enough she happily gulped down the food her mother brought her. When she was finished she moved the food tray to the side and sat on the edge of the bed. Staring out her bedroom window, she mindlessly watched the rain gently falling to the ground. The gray clouds seemed to mirror exactly how she was feeling today. She gazed past her cobble stone fence looking out into the distant hills, she wished she was target practicing or making explosives, anything would be better than sitting there thinking about the mess her life would soon be in.

Not being the kind of girl that entertained self pity, Fiona opened her window and inhaled deeply, she always loved the earthy fragrance left behind by a gentle rain when it mixed with the Irish dirt. It was a comforting smell, and she drew strength from the familiarity of it.

When Claire came back from doing her chores for the day she went to the room that she shared with Fiona. She sounded a little irritated. "It must be nice being able to sleep in and get waited on hand and foot while the rest of us are hard at work ye dosser."

"Lay–off Claire! Sorry I wasn't feelin well. If ye like, I'd be more than happy to trade places with ye. Lord knows I wouldn't want ye to be troublin yourself on my account doing extra chores and such..." She said with a sarcastic bite.

"Ahh jeeze Fiona, I'm just bloody messin with ye. What are ye off yer nut? Don't get yer knickers in such a twist."

"Why don't ye shut yer Cake-hole Claire!"

"Feck Fiona, I'm just twistin hay with ye" Claire was laughing now. "Ye seem to be feeling well enough now sister." Claire smiled, "Do ye want a cup of tea? Maybe it will help get you out of such a nasty mood?"

"Yeah, I guess do…Do ye mind? Thanks."

They could fight like cats and dogs, but when it came to Claire, Fiona could never stay mad at her. Claire just had a way about her. She was kind, and never took herself too seriously, and she had a wicked sense of humor; she admired that about her sister. Even though Claire was completely different from herself, she loved her deeply and she had always been her best friend. They didn't share any of the same interest except for maybe clothes every once in a while, but they had always shared a bond; the kind that only two sisters could ever truly understand. It was forged in the fires of being the only two girls in a family surrounded by boys that often times ganged up on them as brothers can do.

Growing up over the pub they had even shared a bed, and now they shared a room. As far back as Fiona could remember she had helped her mother look after Claire. She brushed her hair and braided it for her every night before they went to sleep. When Claire got a little older they held each other's confidences along with sharing all their secrets and dreams. Fiona felt like she was betraying her sister now by not telling her about the baby, until now she had never kept anything from Claire.

Fiona decided when Claire was home from school at Christmas break, she would finally tell her what she had been aching to share with her for so many weeks now. Maybe after she told her she wouldn't feel so alone. Technically Fiona should have still been in school herself, but her father let her drop out because Fiona hated school. She despised being made to sit still for hours at a time while learning from books, and charts, and graphs, and listening to teachers go on and on about this, and that, and the other. Fiona was always getting in trouble at school for not paying attention in class or for fighting, so eventually her father gave into her and allowed her to continue her education at home with him as long as she promised to keep up her studies.

Fiona had always been a hands on kind of girl. She could listen to her father teach her about history for hours and never get bored because he had a way of bringing the world and its past to life, and she didn't have to sit quietly while learning from him either. She was able to multi task doing other stuff while he spoke to her about such things. She learned her math and chemistry skills from him too, because while making bombs and working with explosives your numbers and formulas had to be perfect. She had to be precise with her measurements and accurate with her mixes or she could kill herself. She was swift with her numbers, she had to be, because playing cards and dealing arms made her quick on her feet, and her father had taught her there was no room for error when dealing with money.


Fiona was glad that Claire would be on break soon, she knew the time had come to make a choice and she wanted some input from Claire before she made any final decisions. It was time to tell Claire the truth about everything and then she would decide what to do about the baby.

Christmas was just around the corner and Fiona and Claire were going to do a little shopping. The girls were getting ready and Fiona asked Claire if she could borrow her sweater the one with the tiny white pearl buttons. It was delicate enough to dress up her jeans with the shredded holes in the thigh and she thought it would look good with her black boots that went over her knees. They had planned on stopping by the church to light a candle for their grandmother and Fiona wanted to add a little class to her clothes so she would be presentable for church. However, Claire told her she couldn't borrow the sweater because she had never worn it yet. She told Fiona she could borrow any other sweater but not her new one. Fiona got upset and made such a fuss about it that Claire finally gave in to her sister and told Fiona she could wear it. Unfortunately before they left to do their shopping while Fiona was getting a drink of cranberry juice in the kitchen her brother Sean was running away from her brother Ruari and he bumped into her making her spill cranberry juice all over Claire's new sweater.

"AH FECK FIONA!"

"Sorry Claire it wasn't my fault. Sean bloody bumped into me and it spilled."

"It is too yer fault. I didn't even want you wearing it, but you talked me into it like you always do, you always have to get yer way Fiona."

"Quit whining about it ye big baby. Ye can go shopping by yourself...and don't worry Claire, I'll buy ye a new one."

"Fine! I don't want ye goin with me anyway!"

After Claire had left to go shopping without her, Fiona felt kind of bad for ruining her sister's sweater. She tried to get the stain out and couldn't, so Fiona came up with a plan to make Claire's favorite dessert, bread pudding. She wasn't very good at baking, but she wanted to try and make amends for not respecting her sister's wishes about wearing her new sweater.

Claire had been gone longer than anyone expected her to be; Fiona had time to finish baking her bread pudding, and had time to taste test it. "Gosh this is awful!." Fiona knew it wasn't very good, but she hoped Claire would appreciate her efforts.

Fiona's mom was starting to get worried; Claire was always very good about coming home when she was supposed to. Fiona told her mom not to worry. "Oh ma ye know how Claire loves to go window shoppin. She's just running late because she always has to look at everythin."

"Yeah, you're right darlin, she does love to shop. I never met anyone with more stamina for shoppin than yer sister." Fiona laughed, she was almost glad she didn't go with her today; she would have been dog tired with the way she had been feeling lately.

Fiona's father, Aidan, came through their front door. Fiona had never seen that expression on her father's face, but she knew whatever news he carried with him it must be bad. She watched her father walk slowly up to her mother and gently grab her by the shoulders, "Davina."

"Yes",...Fiona's father was silent. "Aidan, what is it?"

"Our little Claire is gone; she was accidentally shot by a bastard English Soldier today." Her mother shook her head no and began to back away from her father, "NO! NO! No, no no Aidan! Take it back! You're wrong! It's not true! Don't ye say it, don't ye say it! You're a liar! Her mother slapped his face. He gently held her wrist, "Darlin I wish I was, I only wish I was. I would do anything to make it so that it wasn't true, but our Claire is gone."

"It's because of you, isn't it? All your guns and your bombs and yer runnin around trying to change somethin that ye have no business tryin to change. I told you Aidan Glenanne that one of these days you were goin to get yer self killed only now it's Claire that's paid the price!"

Fiona felt the ground falling out from underneath her feet, her world; her very breath was slipping away. She fell to the floor, her back sliding down the kitchen cabinets. She couldn't wrap her brain around what her father had said. She heard the words, but the horror of them made her doubt that she was even awake. She knew it must be another dream, a nightmare this time.

Her mother had tears streaming down her face, she had never seen her father cry, not once in all her life, but he cried while holding her weeping and distraught mother. Her brothers sat quietly in the living room all of them looking at their parents, but not saying anything. Fiona couldn't believe the last words she would ever speak to her truest and best friend would be words of anger. Fiona thought that maybe if she hadn't of fought with her she could have kept her sister safe. She would never forgive herself for telling Claire she didn't want to go shopping with her.

Tears from everyone flowed throughout the night. People began to show up at their door with food as word traveled among their friends about what happened to Claire. Fiona listened to their words of condolences, "Hollow gestures of comfort." She thought to herself. She knew it wasn't their fault, but nothing anyone could say would be able to bring any relief or sooth any of the pain that any of them were feeling.

Fiona was so tired, and she had to get away from everyone, she needed to be alone. Fiona didn't want to walk into the room she shared with Claire knowing that her baby sister would never step foot in it again. She forced herself pass the threshold and walked over to her sister's perfectly made bed. Fiona sat on the edge and grabbed Claire's pillow. "You always were such a neat freak Claire." Fiona hugged the pillow close; it still smelled like fresh lavender from Claire's shampoo. How would she ever make it in this world without her?

Fiona felt a sharp pain in lower abdomen, but as fast as it had come it had stopped. The strain of the news was more than her heart could bare and she just wanted to close her eyes forever, but instead she opened up her bedroom window and climbed out of it and went to the barn. She grabbed her father's bottle of whiskey that he kept hidden in there from her ma and Fiona finished it off. It did little to calm her nerves, and she wasn't even thinking about the baby, she just needed some relief.

Fiona took a walk into the chilled night and began to plot revenge for her sister's blood. She walked for what seemed like hours before she finally sat down. She was cold now, but she wanted to take a little break before heading back home. Fiona didn't know it, but she was drunk and she fell asleep in the cold night's air. It wasn't until her brother Sean found her that she even realized she had been sleeping. "Damn it Fiona, do you know what you put our parents through, on top of the news of losing Claire last night? We've been looking for ye for hours." "I'm sorry Sean I didn't know, I must have fallen asleep. I just needed to take a walk and clear my head. "

"Clear yer head? You smell like whiskey Fiona! I don't think you were wantin to clear yer head!"

"Mom, Dad, are they okay?"

"No they're not bloody okay Fiona. They're worried sick about ye!"

"Please don't tell them I was drinking, I'll just tell them I fell asleep." Sean reached down to help his sister up. "Fiona yer as cold as ice and yer lips are blue."

"I'm fine Sean, just let's get home."

Sean told his sister about the rest of the details of what they had gathered about Claire's death. There was an IRA funeral being held that day and during the procession one of the English soldiers had rammed into one of the cars in the procession. The English were angry for the bombing that had taken two of their friend's lives the previous week, so they wanted retribution. One of the men jumped out of the car and started shooting at the soldiers. They shot back and a stray bullet hit Claire in the throat and she died on the sidewalk."

"It's my fault Sean!" Fiona was crying hysterically. "It's my fault!"

"What are ye talkin about darlin, it's not yer fault!"

"Yes it is my fault, I was supposed to be with her…I should have been there with her. She died alone because I was too stubborn to swallow my pride and make things right before she left. Oh Sean, how is life ever goin to be okay again? How am I ever goin to be able to feel anything but sadness every single day of my life until the day I die?"

Sean held his sister as she collapsed into his arms. "I don't think our world will ever be as bright as it was without our Claire Fi, but I do know this, we are going to find the son of a bitch that pulled that trigger and we are going to end him!"


Michael knew only one way to live; he had to be the best at whatever he did. There was no room for mistakes especially growing up; too many times his father had beat that lesson into him. Michael knew Frank was a hard ass, no one that ever met the man could ever deny that fact, but what Michael hadn't realized yet was that Frank's constant demands of excellence pressed Michael to a level of distinction that most people would never achieve.

Frank required perfection and nothing less would ever do for him. As hard as that constant level of perfection was to maintain, it regularly pushed Michael to the edge of his limits and sometimes beyond, it drove Michael to be the best at everything he did no matter what it was. He learned to do whatever it took to get the job done.

Michael had been practicing marshal arts ever since he was a young boy; he was a natural; he loved the physicality of it, and often times he could lose himself in his training. It was a great place to escape the dysfunction of his family life. Michael made sure to win his matches in competition because he knew if he lost, Frank would be there to "teach" him a lesson about losing. Frank expected him to win every time and be the best at whatever he did; he never accepted anything less from Michael and Michael never gave him anything but his best.

In Basic training where other's failed to thrive, Michael was at the top of his game. Boot camp was easy for him in almost every way. Michael found that as long as he did what he was told, when he was told, how he was told, he didn't have any problems. Some of the guys in basic training were having trouble with that concept. Michael guessed he had a small advantage over most of the other recruits, having Frank for a father had finally benefited him in some small way; he was used to obeying a drill sergeant. For his entire life, as far back as he could remember, his father had acted like one. Growing up in the Westen home Michael learned how to follow orders with precision accuracy because in his house if he didn't, it could mean the difference between having a normal day and getting knocked around by Frank.

Michael finally found a place that made him happy. He was finally out from under his father's thumb, and he loved it. The Army gave him a place to stay, a decent wage, and the added bonus for Michael was that he didn't have to see his mother. He was still angry at her for not telling him about Peggy, and he was still angry that his mother never found the courage to leave Frank. He couldn't understand why Madeline had let them grow up in a house with a drunk and an abuser, and he had enough of it, he was done with that life forever. The Army gave him a purpose and a direction and a place where he could lose himself in. He knew being a soldier was exactly what he wanted to be. Michael was finally able to live his life for himself without having to worry about his home life. He felt bad that Nate was all alone now, but maybe without him being home Nate would learn to stand on his own two feet. Michael felt like he had taken care of his mom and especially his brother his entire life, and he was finally free to live his life for himself. Michael graduated from his basic training, he had thrown himself into the Army life and he wanted to serve his country to the best of his ability. Unbeknownst to Michael, he quickly got his wish in a way he could have never expected.


Michael always had a hard time sleeping, his mind was continually racing and it didn't help being raised in a home where chaos could erupt at any moment in the night. A number of reasons had seemed to contribute to his unusual sleep habits. One of the ways he coped with his lack of sleep was by jogging. It helped him clear his mind and it made falling asleep a little bit easier for him.

Most people on base were sleeping by one O'clock in the morning unless it was a weekend or they had duty, however, Michael preferred the coolness and the quiet of that hour to get his runs in.

Michael had recently been stationed at the Fort Irwin Army Base in California. It was his first week there and as usual he took his early morning run before he tried to get some sleep. He was about five miles into his run when he saw some headlights from two civilian trucks near the armory. He didn't think much about it until he saw several men in uniform loading weapons into the trucks. He thought it was odd that they would be transporting arms into civilian vehicles. He wanted to take a closer look without being seen, so he climbed up to the roof of the building. He was hoping to hear what was going on; his curiosity got the better of him. Michael heard one of the soldiers say, "Hurry up! We don't need to draw any attention!"

Two of the other soldiers were engaged in conversation with each other, "Edwardo, aint nobody gonna be able to touch Mara Salvatrucha after this!"

"(MS) 13 for life man!"

"We gonna be strapped! Man there's enough fire power here to put a hurt on the 18th street, Juarez Cartel, Los Negros..."

The one that seemed to be in charge, the first one Michael heard talking told the other two soldiers, "Shut the hell up! Move it!"

Michael saw the two that were talking flash some gang signs at each other. They didn't seem overly friendly to the one in charge. They said their goodbyes and then they left. Michael wasn't sure who he was supposed to talk to about what he had just seen, but he knew he just couldn't let it go.

Being new and not knowing who he could trust made reporting things a little bit harder. He had no idea who was in on it with them or if anyone would even believe him, but he knew he had to do something.

Michael thought the best way to find out more about what was going on was by getting recruited by the people who were involved with the crime. He figured the best way to do that would be to replicate the habits of his father. Michael knew that every gambler eventually gets in trouble, and every habitual gambler ends up lying, cheating, or stealing to pay off their debts.

He had seen his own father involved with thugs and criminals throughout his whole life. His father was always involved with one kind of scheme or another, or doing petty crimes to come up with the cash to pay off his loan sharks. Many times his father had to do a "job" to get out of trouble, when people are in debt they can get their clients to do their dirty work for them, especially when the choice is do a job or have their knee caps busted with a baseball bat. Most people will concede to do whatever it is that their loan shark wants from them.

Michael thought if he could appear to be a gambler, one that likes to party, that maybe he could hook up with the people that were stealing the ammunition from the base.

It didn't take long for Michael to ramp up his reputation, he partied every chance he got. Every weekend it was the same thing, lots of girls, lots of drinking and lots of gambling. He eventually got invited to a private poker party where the stakes were higher than the petty cash he had been playing for the last few weeks.

Michael had to raise some money fast to keep himself in the game, but also to boost his reputation for coloring outside the lines. He decided to do some illegal street fighting. He used to make extra cash that way when he was in high school, and he was good at it.

Eduardo told Michael where he could fight, he was one of guys Michael saw flashing gang signs that first night he hid on the roof, and he told him he would make the introduction and give him the complete hookup, but he warned Michael first. "Listen Michael, these guys are for real! They're fierce man; they can deliver a beat down. You know what I mean? This shit is for real!"

"Yeah, I got it; just tell me where I need to be."

"Don't ever say I didn't try to warn you snowman. You probably gonna be the only white boy there that ain't associated with the KKK, and you ain't claiming no gang, so they're gonna be gunning for you in the ring from all sides, they ain't gonna show you no mercy snowman."

"I can handle myself."

"Cool, just lettin you know, but my money ain't riding on you gringo."

"I guess you're gonna be losing your green then."

"You a cocky son of a bitch, aint you?"

"Confident, there's a difference."


The day had arrived for the fight and Michael made his way to the location. He took a bus then walked to the address of the industrial warehouse. The broken windows and graffitied walls made the large abandoned building feel even more ominous. The smell of dirt and dust was thick throughout the structure and the stifling air assaulted his senses as soon as he walked through the door.

Michael decided to take the extra time to prepare for what was coming, he was going into this match blind. He didn't know anything about his opponents, and not knowing their strengths or weakness made winning a fight much more difficult.

Michael saw a man setting up the folding chairs; it looked like he was almost finished, as he approached the dark haired man, the closer he got, he could see that the man was covered in gang tattoos on his neck, face and arms. "Do you have a room I can get ready in?"

"You're one of the fighters?"

"Yeah."

"Go around the ring to the right and the hallway leads to a few rooms; take any room on the right."

"Thanks."

Michael made his way to last room on the right. He changed out of his jeans and t-shirt and put on sweat pants and a sweatshirt. He wanted to keep his muscles and joints warm. He then sat on the floor and began to meditate, something he had learned to do while training in martial arts. He slowed down his breathing inhaling and exhaling connecting with each breath. He closed his eyes and started to visualize himself connecting with each kick and each punch following through with his entire body. In his mind's eye his opponents never had any faces, their features just blurred into body parts, target points where his hands and feet would connect to.

It was only about twenty minutes before the first fight was to begin. People filled the chairs to overflowing. Several different gangs showed up, they always had a presence at these events. It was a gamble as rivals came face to face, but it never deterred people from showing up. Tensions were high so everyone was checked for guns and knives at the door. No weapons were allowed into the warehouse. Nobody wanted the event to erupt into an all out massacre, so leaders held the reigns tight over each member of their gangs making sure to keep their people in check.

These fighting events were all about the money, so for a short period of time these fights kept everyone's feuds on the back-burner while the matches took place. However, the Whites sat with the Whites, the Mexicans with the Mexicans and the Blacks with the Blacks. The local gangs were usually divided by races and anyone that showed up to the fight, even if they didn't care about someone's race, sat with their kind because it was safer that way.

Michael's adrenaline began to flow as the time got closer for his first fight to start. He had learned to channel that energy into a single laser focus. The only thing he thought about was the win. He didn't allow room for fear or apprehension. Anxiety and nervousness were feelings that could thwart any chance of winning so through meditation he had learned to let those feelings pass through him. He kept his mind clear of anything that could get in the way of a victory.

Michael had to win three fights tonight. There were eight fighters matched in four fights, the winners of those fights would face off in another fight, and the winners of that fight would be the last two standing competing for the final win.

Michael changed for the fight and he was ready to go. As his named was called to the mat jeering and screaming filled the warehouse, the noise of boos could be heard throughout the building when they called Michael's name, it was almost deafening. The other opponent was already in his corner.

The rules were stated by the announcer before the fight began. "The rules are simple boys, no holding or grabbing the fence, no butting with the head, no biting or spitting at an opponent, no eye gouging or groin attacks of any kind, no downward pointing elbow strikes, no rabbit punching or throat strikes. You're fighting three rounds, five minutes long with one minute rest in between. You both understand?"

Both men said, "Yes."

"I want a clean fight, let's rock n roll gentlemen"

The bell rung and the fight began.

Michael stayed focused drowning out the sound of the room while watching his attacker's approach. He knew his opponent was over confident he was playing to the crowd rather than focusing on Michael. His opponent's ego betrayed his weaknesses. Michael came out swinging, he didn't hesitate and he drove his punches hard and fast until his opponent was back against the cage. His opponent hung on to Michael trying to stop the devastating blows from coming, but Michael used his knees to bring blow after blow to his abdomen over and over again. Michael brought him down to the floor and pinned him into submission, with one final blow to his face the fight was over. It had ended almost as soon as it had begun. The crowd stood to their feet when the KO punch was delivered and Michael was declared the winner.

As the evening progressed Michael tried not losing his focus. The man he was going up against next was a few inches taller than he was so he knew his reach would be longer, and he appeared to be just as alert and tuned in as he was himself. Michael could see that he was going to be a much harder opponent to win than the first guy he knocked out.

The bell rang and their match began. His opponent quickly got a right hook to his eye and followed through with a few jabs to his face before Michael could even strike back. The punches were powerful and connected to his face with the full force of his opponent's strength. Michael stumbled backwards and was fighting off the disorientation of the dark spots that were appearing before his eyes. He tried to stay steady on his feet; he recovered quickly and got a few kicks into the opponent's gut. He connected hard enough with the man's abdomen that his opponent's wind was knocked out of him; he was trying to gulp in air before he fell to the floor.

Promptly Michael surmised that they were equally matched in speed and strength, but Michael had a slight advantage with his feet. Practicing jujitsu for most of his life made his legs just as dangerous as his fist. He got a face shot in with his foot and his opponent tumbled back towards the cage. It was the opening that Michael was looking for. Michael came after his opponent with everything he had while his opponent was trying to recover from the punishing face kick he received.

Michael knew if he didn't put him down fast then he would spend his entire energy going hit for hit, round after round with this guy, and if he did that he would have nothing left in him for the final fight.

Michael thought he was just about to knock him out when his opponent landed another deadly right hook. Michael fell to the floor, and the crowd went wild. Michael knew he had to win this fight to get to the final round, and nothing was going to stop him. His opponent thought he would be able to keep Michael pinned down and force a submission from him, but Michael had other plans and got out of his hold.

Michael was back on his feet. He targeted his opponent's nose; he knew if he could break it, it would be just the distraction of pain that he needed to end this once and for all. He visualized it, and made it happen. Michael was grateful he landed the kick because he could barely see through the blood that was dripping from his own eye, and his face was already swelling from his injuries. His opponent tried to guard his own face, focused on keeping Michael off of his head; this left an opening for Michael to do some major damage to his body, punch after punch and kick after kick he went hard after his opponent until they guy was at the end of his rope. Michael got the last and final right hook that ultimately took him down. The crowd went crazy; Michael was beginning to win them over. He could hear his name being chanted from the White Supremacist side of the room. He found it odd because he couldn't stand those guys. He'd crack every one of their heads if given the chance.

Michael knew he had to make it through one more fight to take the title and the money would be his. The win was just what he needed to prove to the guys that he could be just as dirty as they were. He needed the group to trust him so he could get to the bottom of who was responsible for stealing the army's guns.

Michael had a little down time before the final fight and went back in the room to collect himself. After he cleaned up his face he sat on the floor in meditation trying to conserve his energy. He almost didn't hear the door open. When he opened his eyes he saw a beautiful Hispanic girl standing in the doorway staring at him. "Hi, my name is Sarah, and Julio sent me in here to keep you company." Michael didn't move from the floor, "No thanks, I'm good."

"Julio is going to be mad at me if I don't keep you company Papi, and you wouldn't want him to be upset with me would you?" Sarah sat on the floor next to him. She purred in his ear, "Don't you want to play?"

"Thanks, but no."

"I can help you relax before you are called to fight again."

"Listen Sarah, this isn't my first time to the rodeo, so you can go tell Julio I'm not interested. I know a lot of newbies fall for the whole seduction thing, but I'm here for the Title and nothing else, you got that?"

Sarah got up from the floor, "Your loss Papi, we could have had some fun together."

Michael waited patiently for his name to be called and when it was time to go he hoped he had what it took to get the job done.

The crowd was thirsty for blood; this was the match they had been waiting for all night. Hector Padilla verses Michael Westen they were the last two men standing. The mood was no different than what Michael had imagined the coliseum was like when the gladiators had to fight to the death. Michael was glad that it wouldn't come to that, but the people wanted blood and they hoped these were the guys that were going to give it to them.

Hector's stare was intimidating, but Michael didn't let it show on his face. Michael was trying to quickly size him up. He was stockier than he was, and he had tattoos covering his entire body. His neck seemed to be as thick as Michael's thighs. He looked like a chained up pit bull ready to unleash a world of hurt. Michael had been saving a few moves of his own in case anyone was paying attention to his style of fighting. He needed something in his arsenal that was fresh in case his opponent was a fast study.

The bell rang and both men came out swinging. Each of them was gunning after each other. Striking wherever they could, both were using their feet to try and land blows to their mid section. Each of them were fast and in complete rhythm so neither one of them were making much contact. They couldn't get near each other; both were looking for an opening. Hector came at Michael with a wide right punch and Michael used his elbow to cover his head and block the blow. Hector came at him again and this time he made contact. He landed a double jab to Michael's injured eye. His eye was bleeding again and swelling to point where he could barely see out of that eye anymore. Hector was moving with speed towards Michael ready to pounce on him again this time he used a combination jab, right cross, inside kick to the leg but Michael blocked every attempt. Both men were squared off again. Hector was losing a little speed, he seemed to be more tired than Michael and Michael wasn't going to let that go to waste. Michael kept on the move and took Hector down to the mat. He let Hector waste a lot of his energy trying to get Michael off of him. When Hector finally got out from under Michael, Michael could see his stamina was waning. Michael continued to move making Hector work for every hit. Michael saw the opening and took a double jab then a single leg take down and brought Hector to the mat again. Michael had him pinned down and the bell rang. They had a minute to recover.

Michael used everything that he had learned about the fighter in that short time and hoped his ability to adapt and change could confuse Hector and get him off track. The bell rang, Michael had been leading with his right the whole night, no one knew he was ambidextrous and now coming from a southpaw position Hector was completely caught off guard. Michael jabbed with his right, crossed hard with his left and knocked Hector out for the win.

He won the crowd over and many of them were yelling Westen, Westen. Just then a fight broke out among two of the gangs. Michael made his way to Julio and told him he wanted his money. Julio wasn't happy that a white boy took the title, but Julio knew if he wanted his money making business to continue he had to be fair about paying the winners no matter who they were.

Michael walked back to the bus stop. He didn't realize that the bus had stopped running at that time and he was stuck with no way to get back to the base. He was in excruciating pain, every muscle felt like he had been run over by a semi-truck, about a half an hour later Sarah drove by and noticed him sitting at the bus stop. "Hey Papi all the buses have stopped running for the evening."

"Yeah, I kind of figured that out."

"You look like shit baby."

"Yeah, I kind of figured that too."

"You need a ride or somewhere, like to the hospital or something?"

"I'm surprised you're offering."

"Look Papi, not many guys turn me down when Julio sends me to them, I was surprised, but not mad."

"Well, I could use a ride back to the base."

"Don't you need some medical attention; you didn't even have a team to help you."

"Yeah, I'm kind of new to the area."

"Well, what are you waiting for, get in."

"Thanks." Michael picked up his bag and gingerly walked towards the car, when he bent down to get in the front seat he winced in pain."

"Aren't you going to get in trouble looking like that when you go back to the base?"

"Yeah, I guess if they knew the truth."

"What are you going to tell them? I don't know maybe I'll tell them some lady offered me a ride and she had some guys waiting to roll me for my wallet. She laughed nervously, "I wouldn't do that Papi"

"You sure about that because that street we just passed is the way to the base."

"Look, I'm sorry alright, but Julio wants his money back and this is the only way."

"I don't think I could handle another ass kicking, couldn't you just tell Julio I had a gun and not take me to wherever it is you're supposed to take me to?"

"So I can get my ass kicked? I don't think so."

"Is he really going to get upset with you, if you tell him I had a gun?"

"I don't know, he's got a temper. Maybe, not…I guess he couldn't blame me if you had a gun to my head."

"I can't take you back to the base what if someone sees me driving you there it would be all bad."

"Well, I guess that's okay, it's going to suck to hoof it all the way back, but it's better than either one of us getting hurt over it."

"Look Papi why don't I take you to a hotel out of town. You have the money for it right?"

"I don't think I trust you."

"Look you would already be getting beat up by some of Julio's thugs if I had plans on taking you to them. I swear it's on the up and up."

"Fine, I don't mean to be demanding or anything, but before we go to the hotel can we get some first aid supplies, some liquor, maybe some extra strength Tylenol, and some ice packs?"

"Pobrecito, no problema."

Sarah drove them out of town and stopped at the store to pick up what Michael needed. Back at the hotel Sarah helped Michael into the room and started attending his face.

"You kind of seem to know what you're doing."

"Si`, my father and my uncle used to be fighters in Mexico." Sarah continued to work on his wounds. My goodness your eye is swollen big time, here's an ice pack, but I'm going to go get some hotel ice too and fill up this plastic bag with it you can put it on your side!"

"Okay sounds good to me."

When Sarah came back she helped hold the ice on Michael's body.

"You seem like a nice girl Sarah, how did you end up working for Julio?"

"I am a nice girl."

"Well it's not very nice trying to distract fighters, or giving them over to Julio's thugs to get rolled over especially after spending the night in the ring!"

"Why do you get your cute face all smashed up? You need the money right? ...So do I."

"You're right; you're right, sorry I sounded so judgmental. You've got your reasons and I've got mine."

"I have a family I have to help take care of."

"You, don't look old enough to have any kids."

"Not mine estupido," She slapped his arm.
Michael winced in pain. "Oh sorry Papi, I didn't mean to hurt you."

"It's fine."

"I help take care of my brothers and sisters. My dad died in a car accident when I was fifteen years old. We had only been here for about two years and that was about three years ago. I met Julio because my father used to do some coaching for some of his fighters. When my dad died, Julio asked me if I wanted a job."

"I knew you looked young… that makes you what 18? You're just a baby."

"Me? Look at you. I know it's hard to tell now with all that bruising and swelling on your face, but when you first came to the cage I wouldn't think you were more than 18 years old either."

"I can tell you one thing for sure, I feel a hell of a lot older than that right now." Michael downed about half of the bottle of tequila, but the pain kept him close to being sober. "Hey how did you get this bottle if you're only 18?"

"Julio had a fake I.D. made for me. It says I'm 22."

"Look Sarah, I really appreciate everything you've done for me tonight, and I appreciate you putting your neck on the line for me too, but I have to tell you I'm about to pass out so could you wake me in the morning?"

"Si`, no problema." Michael took off his sweats and his sweatshirt with Sarah's help and climbed into bed.

Sarah wondered why she had helped the gringo. If Julio ever found out the truth he would hurt her, maybe even kill her. She watched Michael sleep for a while and wondered what the army man's story was. She took a few sips of tequila to calm her own nerves and then climbed into bed with the stranger. She was sad that she met him the way that she did. She knew he would never like her after what she had proposed to him before the fight, he didn't seem like the kind of guy that went for those kinds of girls.

Ever since she worked with Julio, all she ever came across was thugs and gang bangers. None of them were nice guys. She had done many things she was ashamed of; she hadn't been to confession in over two years because of those things. She hadn't thought about that in a long time, she wondered why she was thinking of it now. She took off her clothes and gently melted into Michael's warm body, she was careful not to hurt him. Lying next to him she dreamed of the possibilities of having a normal life someday with a man like him. She finally closed her eyes and fell asleep.

Sarah woke up to the sound of Michael trying to get dressed. "What are you doing Papi? You need help estupido you can't do that by yourself."

"I don't speak Spanish, but I have a feeling you keep calling me stupid."

Sarah laughed, "I'm sorry Papi, it does mean stupid, but I mean it in a very loving way."

"Well,…I guess it's okay then." Michael laughed too, but the pain in his ribs cut it short. When Sarah got out of bed she only had her bra and panties on. Michael quickly looked away. Sarah didn't know if he was a gentleman or if he was just shy, she was intrigued, none of the men she was ever with had a gentleman's bone in their bodies. She walked over to him and helped him put his t-shirt on. It was hard for her to look at his face when it was so black and blue. "It's that bad ha? I haven't wanted to look in the mirror yet."

"It's not too bad Papi, I just don't like to see you all beat up." She kissed his cheek gently and then got dressed.

"Now what? It's Michael…right?"

"Yeah."

"I think I like calling you Papi better." She smiled. Michael thought she was absolutely beautiful, but he knew he didn't need any distractions especially right now.

"Well, how about we go and find some coffee and some breakfast, I'm starving."

"Yeah, that sounds good to me."

"Sarah, you had a chance to take all the money in my bag last night, how come you didn't do it?"

"There are lots of things I have done that I'm not proud of Michael, but I wouldn't do that to you."

"Thank you."

Michael grabbed his bag and they left to eat. "Let's stop and get me some sun glasses before I try to go inside a restaurant, I don't want to scare anybody." Sarah went to the store for him and picked out a pair of glasses she thought would look nice on him. They ate their breakfast had some coffee and went back to the hotel room. "Sarah, I'm sorry things are a mess right now for you, you can go home anytime you want to. I'll find my way back to the base. I'm still in a lot of pain so I think I'm going to pay for another day, finish that bottle, and take some more pills and try to get some more sleep. I want to let my body recover another day before I have to tell them some kind of story."

"I don't have to be home Papi, My mom never expects me home on the weekends anyway, and if Julio is looking for me I don't want to have to tell him yet. I like it here with you."

"Are you sure, it's going to be boring."

"I'll just watch some television; I'm going to watch the Telemundo station." Michael had no idea what she was talking about, but he kind of liked the idea of her staying there with him. Sarah got some fresh ice and put it on Michael's eye and his side and soon after he fell asleep.

Michael slept the whole day away and it was almost eight O'clock at night when he finally woke up. He woke up to the sound of someone knocking on the door, just as Sarah was about to open it Michael yelled at her to stop. Sarah was startled by the urgency in Michael's voice. "Sarah, you don't know who that is, don't open the door."

"It's okay Papi, I ordered some pizza for us." Michael was relieved; he thought it might have been Julio. He was worried about Sarah's safety now. He had put her in danger by convincing her not to take him to Julio's thugs.

"It smells sooo good! Que hambre tengo!"

"What does that mean?"

"It means, I am so hungry!"

"Well then, kay hambree tego me too then." Sarah laughed, "Very good pronunciation Michael...not!"

They spent Saturday night and all day Sunday late into the evening talking and sleeping while Michael was trying to recuperate. Michael had to get back to the base soon and he wasn't sure if he was going to ask Sarah, but he thought she might be a good source of information about who was involved in taking the guns and supplying them to MS13. He knew she met a lot of people through the fights her boss promoted and she was involved in that world.

"Sarah, I have something to ask you and if you don't want to tell me or help me its fine, I would completely understand."

"Don't be silly Michael, if it's just a question go ahead and ask me."

"Well, yes and no. It is just a question, but if you know the answer, telling me could put you in even more danger than you're already in."

"Well, now you have my curiosity Papi, what is the question?"

Sarah, do you know Eduardo Lopez? He's in the army and he came to the fight Friday night. He's the one that told me how to hook up with Julio. "

"Yeah, I know him and some of his friends too. He's bad news Papi, he's runs with the Ms 13 gang. "

"Do you know what he's doing in the army then?"

"I imagine he's there to funnel weapons to the gang. They've had someone working for them from the inside for like the last two or three years. How come you're asking about him anyway?"

"I think I can trust you Sarah, if I tell you something can you keep it to yourself?"

"Sure thing Papi, you look so serious with your eyebrow all scrunched up like that." She laughed.

"Sarah, I want to find out how their getting away with getting the guns and who all is on it. I know there are at least four of them working together.

"Well, I know only two of them are in MS 13."

"I want to get the details before I turn them in. That's part of the reason I wanted to fight on Friday. I needed the money to keep up a cover. The guys all think I'm a high stakes gambler with a really bad addiction, and I wanted them to see I was willing to do whatever I had to, to get the money."

"I see…I know Eduardo and Francisco are both in the gang and both of them are in the army, but I don't know who the other two you saw are, but that's about all I know Michael."

"Sarah, you can't tell anyone I was asking about them or it could get me killed."

"I know, I won't."

Michael wasn't looking forward to going back to base and explaining his face, but it was time to face the music. Sarah asked Michael if she could see him on the down low again. Julio could never find out that she was with him or it could mean trouble for her.

"I don't know Sarah, there's just a lot going on with me right now, and I really don't want to risk you getting hurt over us seeing each other again, and besides that I'm just not interested in getting involved with someone right now."

"There goes your scrunchy eyebrows again….so serious Michael. I'm not asking you to marry me or expect some great romance or anything Papi, but if you change your mind and want to hang out call me." She got a pen from her purse and wrote her number on his hand.

Sarah dropped Michael off close to the base in the cover of night and he walked the rest of the way. When Michael got back he had to report being attacked by muggers so he wouldn't get in trouble for fighting.

Michael found his commanding officer and explained that he was injured in a attempted mugging. He proceeded to tell him that the muggers didn't get his money because he fought them off. However, he spent the weekend in a hotel room because he was too injured to return to base.

"Sounds like bull shit to me son!"

"Excuse me sir?"

"Michael, tell me how it is I know that you were in a illegal fight on Friday night, and how do I know that you suspect that weapons are being taken from this facility, and tell me something else son, how the HELL DO I KNOW YOU SPENT THE ENTIRE WEEKEND WITH A LITTLE DARK SKINNED LUSCIOUS LOLITA?"

Michael had no idea how he knew all those things, but he knew he was busted and he was probably getting kicked out of the military for fighting and for lying to his commanding officer.

"I don't know sir, I have no explanation."

"Son your little hot pepper is FBI! She's been working this case for some time now. Sarah has been under cover for a little over a year; apparently she has been tasked with collecting information for the FBI on the Mara Salvatrucha gang. She came across the military weapons being housed by the MS 13 and was tasked with also finding out how they were getting them. And damn it wouldn't you know that I get to find out because one of my men is making it his personal mission to get to the bottom of who's responsible for stealing our weapons. It's one thing to not be informed by the damn FBI! It's a bunch of bull shit Westen when they say we have inter agency cooperation, don't you ever believe it not for one second, but when one of MY MEN purposely keeps ME OUT OF THE LOOP on something that will UNDOUBTEDLY have major repercussion you can only imagine my complete and utter lack of understanding for how such a COMPLETE AND TOTAL FUCK UP COULD HAPPEN!"

"Sir, yes Sir! I'm sorry Sir."

"I couldn't agree with you more Westen, you are sorry! Sarah or whatever the hell her name is was in communication with the FBI the entire time you were together. I got a call just a couple of hours ago that the FBI wants to use you on their case."

"Sir?"

"Westen you should be getting a one way bus ticket back home with a dishonorable discharge, but instead the head brass has agreed to let you continue to do what you have been doing and to flush out all the people that are involved in this act of treason. You are going to be reporting to Sarah each step along the way son and if you FUCK this up…well there's no saving you Westen! Are we clear?"

"Sir, yes, Sir!"

"Now go get checked out by medical and give them the same bullshit story you tried to give me. Dismissed!"

Michael couldn't believe what had just happened. He couldn't believe Sarah had been playing him all along. He was amazed at her ability to manipulate him. He couldn't decide if he was upset or impressed. Michael didn't know it then, but that would be one of the best lessons he would ever learn on how to turn an asset. She was absolutely believable, she embodied the person she was pretending to be, and he was floored that he never even suspected that she wasn't who she said she was.

Michael spent the next few months gathering intel and reporting to Sarah and his CO what his findings were. Eventually they busted the ring that led to the arrest and court martial of the people who were involved in stealing weapons from the Army. Because of the work Michael had performed it was suggested to him that he should consider joining the elite forces of the Army Rangers. It didn't take long for him to make the decision to go for it. With the recommendations from the FBI and his CO, he was a prime candidate for the rigorous training of one of the most elite military service in the entire world.


Michael attended his basic Military Occupational Specialty course and graduated from the Army's Airborne School. He successfully completed his first tour of duty, and met the recruiting qualifications for becoming a member of the 75th Ranger Regiment. He also completed the Ranger First Responder (RFR) course. It taught him critical first aid and advanced combat lifesaving procedures in order to give him the skill necessary to treat and save lives under combat conditions. When he completed the Ranger Assessment and Selection Program (RASP) he finally became an effective member of the 75th Ranger Regiment.

Michael didn't invite any of his family to witness his graduation and when it was time to recite the Ranger's Creed he knew this was the life he wanted and he would never look back…

"Recognizing that I volunteered as a Ranger, fully knowing the hazards of my chosen profession, I will always endeavor to uphold the prestige, honor, and high esprit de corps of my Ranger Regiment.

Acknowledging the fact that a Ranger is a more elite soldier who arrives at the cutting edge of battle by land, sea, or air, I accept the fact that as a Ranger my country expects me to move further, faster and fight harder than any other soldier.

Never shall I fail my comrades. I will always keep myself mentally alert, physically strong and morally straight and I will shoulder more than my share of the task whatever it may be, one-hundred-percent and then some.

Gallantly will I show the world that I am a specially selected and well-trained soldier. My courtesy to superior officers, neatness of dress and care of equipment shall set the example for others to follow.

Energetically will I meet the enemies of my country. I shall defeat them on the field of battle for I am better trained and will fight with all my might. Surrender is not a Ranger word. I will never leave a fallen comrade to fall into the hands of the enemy and under no circumstances will I ever embarrass my country.

Readily will I display the intestinal fortitude required to fight on to the Ranger objective and complete the mission though I be the lone survivor."

Michael had done it, it was hell, it was more than he could have anticipated and with so many men washing out of the program he was happy with completing at the top of his unit. He had proved to be the best of the best, and he looked forward to fulfilling his duties to his country.

Michael began his new journey enrolling in the Ranger Language Program (RLP) where he would gain the knowledge of foreign languages and dialects that would be useful to him when conducting ranger operations in foreign environments. Because he excelled in this program he was given the opportunity while in his regiment to attend additional language training schools. He had an amazing ear for languages, especially Russian.

Michael also attended School where he was taught the fundamentals of small unit leadership and patrolling. Ranger school is the most physically and mentally demanding leadership school the Army has to offer. It is a mark of distinction in the military and civilian communities, and proof positive of proven leadership under the toughest conditions possible. Because Michael was a member of the 75th Ranger Regiment he had unparalleled access to other countless military schools, including Jump-master, Sniper, Pathfinder, Military Free-fall, Scuba, Survival-Evasion-Resistance-Escape(SERE), and others, and he took full advantage of every one of them.


It was late in the fall when Michael got a message from his mother. She had quit writing him years ago because she never heard back from him, she had hoped someday Michael would forgive her and let go of all of the anger he had for her.

Michael wondered why she had started writing again. He almost didn't open the letter, but curiosity got the better of him. "Dear Michael, I hope you are happy and healthy, and that Army life is treating you well. We all miss you very much! I'm writing you today with a heavy heart and I can't seem to find the right words, so I will just come out with it. Your Grandmother has passed away. Your Nana died of complications from a stroke and I wanted to let you know we are having her funeral in a month. I didn't know where you would be so I wanted to try and give you enough time to arrange coming home if you wanted to say goodbye. Please come home son, I love you, mom."

Michael was devastated his grandmother was gone; she had always meant so much to him. He wished now that he had taken the time to visit her. He had a lot of leave time on the books, but he never bothered taking it, instead he was always opting for more schooling, more training, and more missions. In the back of his mind he knew she was getting quite old and that he should take the time to see her before she left this world, but the thought of going back to Miami and dredging up so many old memories kept him away.

Michael took his letter and walked outside. There was a chill in the air, he closed his eyes and thought of his grandmother. He called her Nana, he knew a lot of people called their grandmother's by that name, but that name was a very special to him. His grandmother would always hold a sweet place in his heart, she always had a way of making him and Nate feel safe when they were with her. Michael knew he had been selfish with his time, and now there was nothing he could do to fix his mistake. He really didn't want to see his family, but he decided he would at least go to the funeral, even if no one knew he was there, he would at least say goodbye from a distance.


Sam had his reasons for wanting to get out of the all boy boarding school his father made him attend, and football was one of them. Sam had a natural athletic ability and he finally was going to be able to use it towards a sport of his choice. Football was more primal than any of the more reserved sports allowed at a gentleman's school and Sam was ready to experience everything public school had to offer. Of course having been exposed to the ways of love by Ashley made Cheerleaders one of the other reasons Sam wanted to get out of his all boys school, he was ready to mingle with the lovely ladies of Analy High.

One of Sam's friends in school ultimately got him interested in ROTC. Sam could have never imagined giving up football especially after getting his team to the playoffs and leading them to victory, but something about ROTC kept calling to him, and eventually he turned in his football uniform for a uniform of another kind.

After being involved in ROTC Sam set his sights on joining the elite United Sates Naval Academy. When Sam's mother allowed him to attend a regular High School he had promised her that he would do his very best in school. He worked really hard at maintaining his 4.0 average and kept true to his promise. Even though his plans in the beginning did not include the USNA his grades were high enough to apply there and be considered as an applicant.

His mother was extremely proud of him and all though his father was happy that Sam wanted to attend such a prestigious school, military life was not the life that he had intended for Sam. At Sam's mother's request, Sam was finally going to get the nomination from his father's connections that he needed to be considered for the Academy. Besides having excellent grades one of the requirements to apply for the USNA was that a United States Senator or Congressman needed to recommend you as part of your application process.

Sam kept his upbringing quiet he never liked to talk about the money that he came from; he always wanted to be just one of the guys, and the only time Sam ever took advantage of his father's connections was when he needed the recommendation for school.


Sam did well in college too; he was an exceptional student and he had the respect of his superiors and peers alike. He was easy going, hardworking, extremely intelligent and physically gifted. When Sam graduated with honors from Annapolis his love for his Country had grown exponentially and a new calling beckoned him, he was determined to become a United Sates Navy Seal.

Sam was accepted into the program and it was there he was trained to deliver highly specialized, intensely challenging warfare capabilities that went far beyond the standard military forces. It is said that when there is nowhere else to turn, Navy SEALS are in their element. They achieve the impossible by way of critical thinking, sheer willpower, and absolute dedication to their training, their mission, and their fellow Special Operation's team members. This was absolutely true for Sam.

His training included direct action warfare, special reconnaissance, counter-terrorism, and foreign and internal defense. The SEAL'S duty is to conduct small-unit maritime military operations which originate from and return to a river, ocean, swamp, delta, or coastline. Often times they have to navigate shallow waters that ships and submarines are limited in due to the depth of water.

Like his fellow team members Sam was trained to operate in any environment whether it be sea, air or land. He was also trained to operate in a variety of climates such as the desert, arctic, and the jungle. Sam's abilities did not go unnoticed between his training at the USNA and his training to become a SEAL it had taken over six years to complete, and Sam had proven he was more than ready to put to use his skills for the good of his Country.


Sam was drinking with a friend, he was trying to forget Amanda...

Sam made friends wherever he went and while he was in BUD/S training in Coronado, California it was no different. It was there the Sam fell under the spell of an astonishing beauty named Amanda.

Sam had a reputation for charming the ladies and no matter where he went his ability to pick up on any woman he was interested in was legendary among his friends. In the whole time they had been in training with Sam not one girl ever turned him down. The guys thought he was Superman until the fateful day he had finally met his kryptonite.

Amanda was visiting with a friend and they were both staying at Angela's parent's vacation condo on the beach. Angela had stayed there throughout the years over her summer breaks but this was Amanda's first time there. They were college roommates and best friends, but this was their first summer getaway together. They had the condo, the California sun, and they were surrounded by military men because the Navy base was located on the island, it was a college girl's dream vacation and it was a summer that neither one of them would ever forget.

Amanda was beautiful, blond and after a month of her skin being kissed by the California sun she could pass for a bronzed native girl any day of the week. She had a bohemian spirit and she fit right it with the surfers and the beach bums, they quickly accepted her as one of their own. Angela had been surfing there for years and taught Amanda how to catch some waves, she was an absolute natural.

Amanda was having the time of her life and she felt liked she belonged there, she never wanted to go back home. She was actually considering staying in California; it wasn't that much of a surprise to Angela to hear Amanda declare her love for the beach or wanting to live there. It wasn't the first time Amanda had been distracted from reality. She always knew her friend was a bit of a gypsy and she was somewhat notorious for her adventurous streak. Her wander lust had already taken her to zip line in South America, scuba dive off of the Great Barrier Reef, and after visiting Ireland she hooked up with the lead singer of the Irish Punk/Folk band called SioFraFire and traveled with them for an entire summer. Amanda had a track record of leaving a trail of busted and broken hearts wherever she went. She would ignite the flames of love to super nova hot and then when things got too serious she would always walk away.

The girls morning always started with some hot tea, some yoga, and surfing the morning "glass off". Today would be different, today Angela thought it would be fun to show Amanda a little hidden secret that most people didn't know about. Today they would get up at the crack of dawn and do things a little different. Angela would show Amanda where the boys (future Navy SEALS) took their morning runs on the sandy shores of Coronado Beach followed by a five mile swim. They could get front row seats by sitting on the sand dunes while watching the eye candy doing their morning P.T.

Angela brought a thermos of hot toddies and the girls welcomed in the sunrise with a buzz and a smile.

"Damn Angela why haven't we been here before today?"

"I wanted to get a little girl's time in with you before I introduced you to the Coronado buffet."Amanda laughed, "Good thinking girl…good thinking."

Angela was the first one to notice Sam Axe, of course she didn't know his name at the time, "Amanda, look at that cutie!" She pointed to one of the taller men making his way through the sand.

"Which one, there are so many of them?" She said with a contented sigh.

"The one with the chin, I mean my gawd you could cut a diamond on that chiseled face."

"Oh yeah, he is a cutie!" Both of the girls whistled and hollered as the men jogged past them. Sam noticed Amanda right away and almost stumbled in the sand.

"Watch it Sam I've never known you to "fall" for one of the locals."

"Pure coincidence amigo."

Amanda asked Angela, "So are you going to go for the one with the super man chin?"

"Oh hell no, he is all kinds of trouble! You can tell just by looking at him."

"Are you sure because if not then I think I'm going to get him to take me out to dinner."

"Dinner…is that what we're calling it these days? Angela giggled. "Go for it Mandy but girl watch yourself with that one."

On their way back from training when Sam paraded past Amanda she stood up and pointed to him and yelled out, "Meet me at the Del Coronado at 7:00" Sam pointed at himself as if to say me? She shook her head yes.

"Hooyah" was yelled in unison over Sam's invitation. Every eye was on Amanda and every guy wished they were walking in Sam's shoes tonight.

Sam was happy that she had called out to him; he wouldn't have been able to make contact with her without getting in trouble. It was Friday night and he had the weekend to blow off some steam, meeting up with a beautiful blond was just the ticket he needed.

Amanda spent the later part of the afternoon getting ready for the handsome Navy SEAL she saw jogging on the beach. She wondered what they would have in common to talk about. She had always leaned towards guys that were musicians, artist, nature lovers, she couldn't imagine that Uncle Sam's dream boy was quite her type, but it was California, it was summer, and she had always been up for trying new things.

Amanda wore a white gauzy dress that flowed past her tattooed ankles. She placed a few daisies in her long blond hair. She decided to dress her fingers and toes in silver and turquoise rings, and she kept her makeup clean and simple. She looked in the mirror and thought she needed a touch of gloss to finish off her look. She turned to the side to see the back of her dress and thought the cut out back showed off her lotus flower perfectly. Angela walked in and was stunned at how gorgeous her friend looked. "My goodness Amanda you're going to knock him dead." Amanda hugged her friend, "Don't wait up for me Angel, I'm feeling a little devilish tonight."

Amanda arrived at the Hotel Del Coronado restaurant a little bit early and ordered a drink. The room featured a beautiful Victorian style décor with high vaulted ceilings made of sugar pine and was decorated with four magnificent chandeliers. The furniture was elegant and had a touch of whimsy due to its nostalgic nod to an era of another time and place. "The ocean view only added to its charm and beauty." She thought to herself.

Amanda's back was facing the entrance; Sam knew immediately that it was her. He only saw her for a short time but there was no denying her exquisiteness. He was intrigued that the beauty had such a lovely tattoo on her back, it only made her more alluring to him.

Sam brought flowers and wore his dress whites to their date. He handed the flowers to the lovely lady that caught his attention on the sand dunes earlier that morning, "For you." He took one of her hands and kissed the back of it. She smiled, "Thank you."

"I don't even know your name?"

"It's Amanda, and your name?"

"Samuel, but you can call me Sam."

"Hello Sam, I'm so glad you were able to join me tonight." Amanda couldn't believe how much more handsome he was up close and in person. He was tall, broad shouldered, and quite stunning in his uniform. He almost took her breath away.

Sam ordered a Remi Martin XO and the conversation started to flow. Two people could not have been more different and that was part of the strong attraction between them. They ordered a wonderful meal and talked for hours until the restaurant closed.

They continued their conversation on the Coronado shore until the early morning and as they watched the sun come up Amanda invited Sam to come back to the condo with her.

Angela wasn't up yet and they quietly snuck into Amanda's room so they wouldn't disturb her. The passion of the evening had been building between them and they lost themselves in each other's arms the entire morning. Both of them had known many lovers, but being together was like experiencing love for the first time.

Sam and Amanda spent the next two days entangled in each other's arms discovering new heights of ecstasy and when they weren't making love they enjoyed the salt sprayed air and their ocean view. While sitting in the sand they shared stories of past adventures and future dreams. Both of them wanted time to stop; however, time didn't stop, and Monday was fast approaching, Sam had to get back to reality.

Amanda would spend each morning on the sand dunes watching Sam run and swim and remind him of what he would be missing each day until the weekend came around. He was glad she showed up every day because even if he couldn't talk to her being able to see her made him feel like his world had a brand new color in it.

Sam and Amanda spent the rest of the summer pretty much the same way they had spent their first weekend together and before Amanda was supposed to return to her last year of school Sam asked her to marry him. Amanda was shocked and surprised neither one of them seemed like the marrying kind, but both of them were caught up in the current of love that was pulling them both deeply further and further towards the uncharted sea of monogamy. Amanda had her concerns but ignored them and she agreed to marry Sam. They decided to go to Las Vegas and get hitched.

Everything was exciting with Sam and their road trip to Vegas was no different. When Sam asked when she would move to California she told him not until she was done with school. She had half halfheartedly entertained the idea of staying in California when she first arrived, but she wasn't seriously about to move when she only had one year left of school. Sam was a little confused because he thought once they got married they would be together, they got in a small spat on the way to the chapel but Sam said, "Look Amanda, we'll work the details out, we know we want to be together and that's all that matters."

"Yeah, you're right babe. We'll work it out…" She was beginning to have her doubts but she pushed them aside. She had never been with anyone like Sam and she didn't want to lose him. "Do you think your parents are going to freak out about you getting married without having met me Sam?"

Sam was hesitant because he knew it absolutely would be a problem for his father. Amanda wasn't exactly the kind of girl his father would accept. She wasn't an ivy leaguer and she didn't come from old money. In fact she was the complete opposite of the kind of woman that would be acceptable to his father, but he thought his mom would definitely like her. "Nah babe, they're going to love you." Amanda heard the slight hesitation and wondered if Sam was being completely honest.

Sam and Amanda got married and after the excitement of what they had just done wore off both of them knew it was the biggest mistake they could have possibly made. Lying in bed the next morning each one of them wanted to tell the other what they were thinking, but both of them were worried about hurting the other person's feelings.

Amanda just couldn't keep quiet any longer, and neither could Sam, at almost the same time each one of them said, "I think this was a mistake!"

Amanda and Sam both laughed with great relief. "We just didn't think this out Sam, it was impulsive just like everything I ever do, but I can't come to California with one year of school left, and do you really see me keeping the home fires burning while you're out saving the world?"

"No, Amanda, I can't. I just didn't want to say goodbye and I couldn't think of any other way to keep you."

"Sam, this was the best summer of my life and who knows maybe we'll hook up again, if it's meant to be fate will bring us back together."

"I don't put much stalk in fate Amanda, but I get what you're trying to say. Mandy it's been the best summer of my life too. I'm gonna miss my boho baby…"

"Ah Sam, I'm going to miss you too, you'll always be my Superman. Actually Sam if truth be told... baby, you had me flying higher than Superman ever could." They held each other for the rest of the day and they tried to appreciate every minute they had left together. Amanda took a Polaroid of the two of them. She was always snapping Polaroid's wherever they went. "Here Sam, this one is for you. Something to remember the shortest lived marriage in history by." Sam looked at the picture and he couldn't imagine going back to his life without Amanda. He hugged her close and they made love one last time before they had to say goodbye.


After a few years Sam had made quite a name for himself in the intelligence community, he was one of their best operatives. Sam was part of one of the first western forces to deploy to the Persian Gulf as part of Operation Desert Shield. His team helped infiltrate the capital city of Kuwait and within hours of the invasion they had gathered intelligence that would help them develop plans to rescue US embassy staff should they become hostages.

In February of 1991, Sam was part of a six-man team that launched a mission to trick the Iraqi military into thinking an amphibious assault on Kuwait by coalition forces was imminent by setting off explosives and placing marking buoys 500 meters off the Kuwaiti coast. The mission was a success and Iraqi forces were diverted east away from the true coalition offensive.

Later, Sam was involved in a subsequent SEAL operation during the invasion of Afghanistan. It was there that he first met an up and coming elite operative by the name of Michael Westen. They were both involved in a joint special operations unit made up of Special Forces including Special Operation forces from other countries.

They conducted combat operations in the massive cave complexes at Zhawar Kili, the city of Kandahar, and surrounding territories. They covered hundreds of miles of rough terrain in the Southern Eastern part of Afghanistan. Over the course of six months their teams killed or captured over 200 Taliban and Al Qaeda fighters, and destroyed tens of thousands of pounds of weapons and ordinances. Sam didn't know it then, but Michael would later be responsible for saving his life and someday they would become the best of friends.


Jesse unlocked the key to his front door. He took about two steps in his home when a vase came flying across the room towards his head; he ducked just in time to miss it. "You bess be tellin me where ya been all night Jesse? I swear on mi madda's grave if you've been whorin around with dem Miami bitches I'm gonna….."

"Baby, baby what the hell is matter with you? I've been working all night. I was doing surveillance. I left a note for you in the kitchen and told you I wouldn't be home."

"I dint get no note Jesse! You're a liar and a no good cheatin bastard! You've been steppin out all di while I've been waitin at home for ya."

"Listen baby, Sabryna, you know I'm not like that. You need to calm down baby."

"Don't be tellin me what I need to be doin. Naa Badda mi wit more lies!

"Don't bother you with more lies? I have no idea what you're talking about. You're just acting crazy!" Sabryna grabbed her wine glass and threw it near Jesse's face barley missing him by a fraction of an inch.

"Sabryna, I can't stay here when you get like this…this is ridiculous!

"Where's the damn note then?"

"Baby I don't know, maybe it fell on the floor. I put in on the fridge, see if it slipped underneath it or something."

"You better hope that note is there." Sabryna crawled on her hands and knees and found the note lying on the floor. "Oh Jesse, baby, I'm sorry I dint truss ya. I should know bette than dat you're such a good man!"

Sabryna went over to Jesse and started kissing him and nibbling on his ear. He was so mad at her for acting insane, he tried to push her away, but anytime she started loving on him and talking sweetly to him he couldn't resist her charms. All his anger vanished, he was convinced she must be some kind of a witch because every time he thought he had enough of her and was about to walk away from their relationship she would seduce him with the very essence of her femininity. Once again he was like putty in her hands, his resolve vanished, and he was left returning her kisses.

Sabryna had a temper, but she was like a drug he couldn't give her up, he wanted to quit her, but he was like a fly trapped in her silky spider web. Her love was poison and though he was ashamed of himself for staying with her, somehow in the moment he didn't care.

They didn't bother going to the bedroom they made love in the living room and they couldn't get enough of each other. When Sabryna had given him all that he desired she cuddled with him and talked like nothing had ever happened. Jesse saw the broken glass out of his peripheral vision on the floor and deep down he knew their relationship was doomed, but it that very moment he didn't care.

Sabryna was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her caramel colored skin was accentuated by her green eyes. Her complexion glowed with the dew of beauty and her exotic mixture of both her father and mother provided her with the very best of both of them. Her hair was long and naturally curly and her lips were full. Her womanly curves drew men towards her direction no matter where she was and Jesse had been no different.

Jesse met Sabryna the night he had gone to a bar to forget his troubles at work. He was working for CIFA at the time as a field agent, but he was having trouble with his superiors, and it was making life difficult. Jesse sat at the bar wishing he could be different, but he was never one to go by the book; a behavior that was frowned upon in his line of work. He was an excellent operative, one of the best his department had ever seen, but he had one major flaw, one that might not be overlooked much longer. If he saw someone in trouble it was impossible for him to look the other way. "Great if you're a boy scout." He thought to himself, "not so good when you have to play by the rules."

Several women had tried to hit on him that night, but he wasn't in the mood, he just wanted to drink alone in his misery for a while. Until he saw Sabryna, he wasn't the only one that noticed her. Men were practically falling on themselves trying to get her attention. Jesse decided to turn around because with all that competition he figured what was the point of trying.

Sabryna sat at the bar, she was wearing a plunging white jumpsuit that accentuated her curves in all the right places. Even women would stare at her from across the room because of her beauty.

Jesse figured she was probably alone because she didn't have any female friends, having studied human behavior for his line of work he surmised that most women would be intimidated by her beauty and would not like continually living in her shadow. He continued to sip on his Johnny Walker red as he observed her from a short distance. She seemed to be surveying her kingdom and perhaps choosing which Knight she would take to her bed chambers for the evening. Jesse laughed out loud because of the story he was making up in his mind as he was watching all of this unfold. He knew that she knew, she could have any one of her choosing.

She turned around and was about to order a drink. Several men almost knocked over each other trying to be the one that could pay for her drink and hopefully start an opening for a conversation. She turned down several offers, Jesse heard her tell each one of them that she was just looking to drink alone tonight. He noticed her West Indies accent. He wasn't exactly sure where she was from, but it was cute none the less. Most men turned away with disappointment as she declined their request, but one man continued to hound her getting ruder as the minutes went by. Jesse was never able to stand on the side lines and not take action when he thought action was needed.

Jesse walked over to her and said, "Sorry baby I'm late." He looked at the man who was being rude, "Is there a problem here?" Jesse was about a foot taller than him and obviously stronger. "No, no problem here. I didn't know the lady was with anyone, I was just trying to buy her a drink."

"Well, now you know, so beat it!"

"I could of handled it myself, but thank ya for the rescue."

"No worries." Jesse turned around and started heading for the door. Sabryna was intrigued by the handsome stranger especially because he didn't try to hit on her. She quickly followed him to the door. "So where are ya taken mi to dinner?" Jesse was pleasantly surprised. "I know just the place. How does a steak and maybe some lobster sound?"

"It sounds like ya know how to have a fine time Mr…?"

"Porter, it's Jesse Porter, and your name?"

"Sabryna Baptiste."

"Well it's a pleasure to meet you Sabryna Baptiste."

Jesse didn't know it at the time but that was the beginning of the most tumultuous relationship he would ever be a part of…well until he met Michael Westen that is, but that's a story for another day.