I've had this little plotbunny eating away at me for a little while, so I finally wrote it! Enjoy xo


Raising Sherlock Holmes

"Sherlock! What the bloody hell are you doing!?"

"Experiment. Go away, John."

"THERE'S A FOOT IN THE MICROWAVE!"

"I told you, it's an experiment."

"What the hell kind of experiment involves microwaving a foot!?"

"One that your average mind could neither begin to fathom nor comprehend, so leave it alone!"

John Watson sighed, exasperated. Sherlock bloody Holmes! Urgh! What a frustratingly facetious human being! He slammed the microwave door shut. He knew Sherlock would be difficult to live with, but he didn't think it would be quite this bad. Feet in the microwave, harpooning dead pigs in the bathtub, severed heads in the fridge! John shot a look at Sherlock. Oh what was he doing now!?

"Sherlock! WHY ARE YOU SETTING MY PANTS ON FIRE!?"

"Experiment!"

Damn his experiments! They were ridiculous! What scientific knowledge could possibly be gained through burning his pants?

"Sherlock! You can't set things on fire indoors! Door that outside!"

"But it's cold out there!"

"THEN PUT ON YOUR COAT!"

For God's sake. John rubbed his temples, feeling a migraine coming on. Honestly, it was like living with a hyperactive, overly-inquisitive five-year-old! A five-year-old with a gun! And a bloody harpoon!

"John! JOHN!"

The fair-haired doctor groaned.

"What Sherlock?"

"I've burned myself! Take care of it!

Bother Sherlock Holmes! John rolled his eyes, retrieving the first aid kit. He found Sherlock sitting on the stairs, the smouldering remains of his pants smoking away on the floor. Sherlock held out his right palm, and angry red welt raised on the porcelain skin.

"Oh Sherlock," John tutted, "Did you drop the pants when they were ablaze and try to catch them?"

Sherlock averted his eyes from John's stern gaze, like a child caught stealing sweets. He quietly mumbled "Yes..."

"Sherlock you idiot."

The dark-haired man's eyes shot up, fixing his steely glare on the smaller man.

"John Watson, I am not an-"

"Shut up, Sherlock," John replied fondly.

Sherlock just grunted in response, somewhat less fondly. John cleaned the burn and bandaged it.

"Come on, back upstairs. No more experiments today though."

"But Jooooooohn..."

"No buts, Sherlock. Do as you're told!"

"But-"

John glared at the younger man, who immediately scrambled to his feet and dashed up the stairs. John breathed out heavily, shaking his head as he watched after the consulting detective. Just like a child.


Thanks for reading xo