Recently I seem to not have written any one-shots for those who read them, and the reason for this is because I am writing something special for X-mas for all those yaoi-lovers of USUK and more out there, and hopefully I can enjoy my three week break while writing one-shots! For the time being, I decided to write about some Nations getting strange...cookies! But not just ANY kind, they are...fortune cookies!

Please enjoy this one-shot called...


Box of Fortune Cookies

EVERYONE stared down at the table with curiosity, fear and suspicion all wrapped into one expression. America, China, Britain, Russia, France, Italy, Japan and Germany all looked at the peculiar gift with a lovely red scarlet bow on top as some nervous glances show around the nations, wondering who should go first to open it.

"Well, who the bloody hell should open it?" Britain, a blond-haired man asks first.

Everyone looks at him, knowing he is right (though they hate to admit it) and that they should open this strange gift.

"If you ask moi-" France starts.

Russia turns his head over to him with a wide, child-like smile. "Which we do not."

"We should play my favorite game!" France said, finishing his interrupted sentence. He clinched one fist and his nose starts flaring with steam as if a wild bull is preparing to charge. "It goes like this: one of you who I pick shall start to take off your clothes-"

BANG!

Britain blasted a powerful punch on France's head, feeling the vibration upon his head from the destructive blow Britain given him.

"We are not going to become victims of your perverted games!" Britain shouted, followed by America laughing hysterically while Japan backs away from the three and shuffles over to Italy and Germany for protection.

"Well, what do we do now?" China asks, still keeping his eyes on the box with whatever may lie within it. Soon everyone gathered around again in a calm matter and continue to stare intensely at the box.

Germany raised his hand, "I will open it." He announced, slowly and carefully moving his hands to the box and undoes the ribbon while everyone gulps huge chunks of saliva.

Germany's blue eyes wandered inside the box, then he raised an eyebrow which suddenly summoned everyone to shuffle over to the nearest corner to hide. Germany could see inside the box a huge bundle of strangely made cookies with something visible inside. he took one out, staring very hard on the cookie.

China, who got out of the corner finally, said: "Oh, those are the fortune cookies I ordered, aru. I was hungry, so I ordered some. The guy on the phone sounded thickly British, aru..."

Germany's hand clenched at the cookie that broke into pieces.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO IN THE FIRST PLACE?" Germany demanded to know, feeling a heavy surge of anger welling in his temple and China only shrugs with his arms in the air.

"That is very immature of you, China," Japan said. "We could have thought that it was a bomb."

"Or Britain's scones…" America mumbled quietly as he glanced at Britain who looked confused at him.

"Or a pair of France's dirty books I recently found lying on the ground." Russia said, wanting to join the conversation and making everyone fearfully look at Russia. What does Russia know about France's dirty books?

"None of that matters, ja?" Germany said, dusting his hand from the cookie and suddenly a piece of folded paper fell on to the table. That would be his fortune, but Germany doesn't believe in things like this and was going to discard the paper when Italy out of nowhere takes it and unfolds it.

"You will become Italy in ten seconds…" Italy said aloud and he looks at Germany with his usual gleeful smile. "Vé, looks like you will become me very soon!"

10…

9…

8…

"Wait, what are you saying?" Germany said, snatching the piece of paper and glares deadly at the pompous paper.

Everyone secretly counted in their heads to see if the fortune could come true, and they all wanted it to happen because they all dislike the way Germany always bosses everyone around like children when he never knew how to have fun.

7…

6…

5…

Germany suddenly starts to hiccup, and he wouldn't stop as his hair starts changing slowly into a brownish color and his size grew smaller and shorter. This was really happening and right before their eyes, they see right in front of them another Italy who blankly looks at all the nations with his now amber eyes. Germany—or Italy number two—looked at his hands and gasped.

"Oh Mein Gott, what in the hell is this?" Germany shouted, still remaining with his German voice that oddly didn't change.

"Too bad," France said sadly with a sigh, "and I was really hoping for that petty voice of yours to be gone along with that cheap, muscular body of yours."

"Oh, will you just—"Germany hiccups suddenly, "Shut the—what the hell?" Right then, Germany's voice made a thick, fluent Italian accent which made Italy number one's eyes glitter brighter than stars itself.

Italy number one grabbed hold of Italy number two who desperately tried to wriggle out of his annoying hug, but Italy number one keeps his hug as tightly as ever. America who completely forgotten quickly about the situation got himself a cookie, but then was suddenly stopped by Britain who grabbed his wrist warningly before he could get a cookie himself.

"America, are you that thick?" Britain questions him. "Are you willing to become a fool as you are now and read one of those things? I mean, look at Germany now!" Britain points to Italy number two who is singing while Italy number one is dancing joyfully like an over excited idiot. "Are you willing to do that?"

America looks at his cookie and then to Britain, but then he took his gaze longer at the cookie which he broke in half and eats the remains while reading the fortune. Britain's face flush bright red of anger and embarrassment.

"You will fall in love with the guy you least expect..." America read out loud. "What does that-" But then, America stops chewing his cookie and shook a little as if in a chill.

"A-America?" Britain said, putting a hand on his shoulder...

"WHERE IS MY LITTLE GERMAN BOY?" America cried gleefully as he scurries around the room like a love-struck idiot. Even though he is an idiot...and always will be.

"Oh bloody hell, America!" Britain yelled. "America loves Germany, of all people!"

Russia innocently looks at the cookies, suddenly shoving all of his hands into the box and starts searching for a specific cookie.

"A-America, what's wrong?" Britain asked.

Then, America suddenly leap up on top of the table and let his arms up in the air. "WHERE'S MY GERMAN BOY?" He shouted, immediately getting off and wildly search around the room for Germany.

Britain only stared, gawked of his stupidity for not listening to him as Russia looks innocently at the box of fortune cookies. Right then, Britain heard strange rattling noises from behind and turns to see Russia furiously searching for a cookie, and Britain knew right then he wanted to become Germany so he can... Britain saw a cookie jump out, sitting there dead serious as if waiting to be opened.

"I'm not going to open you," Britain said to it as if it was alive. "And nothing you do will convince me that-"

Britain looks at the cookie, feeling temptation to open the cookie. Could he get a good fortune? Or will he end up like the others and get a horrible one? Either way he wouldn't take the chance, not in a million years. France strolls over to the treat, taking it and smirking right at Britain.

"Oh come on, Britain," France said as he presumes to open the cookie, "you can't possibly be this edgy or one silly cookie. Here, I'll read the fortune and we'll see that this is obviously a joke." France took one glance at his paper and made of face filled with regret.

And right then his head starts to shake a little, making Britain take a step back from this discomforting look and soon France's face starts turning greyish. His skin from his face became rubbery and grey, and soon his nose leisurely extended itself to...an elephant's nose that out of nowhere blew loudly, alerting everyone.

"MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL, GORGEOUS FACE!" France cried, soon he starts running around the room with his face covered by his hands as America asks the two Italians where Germany could be because he wants to marry him. Italy number one and two said they don't know where he is now.

Japan and China stared at everyone, all confused of how this even happened. But right at the window, a boy's head slight emerges but not completely in view for the nations to see. Sealand, a wannabe nation, is chuckling at all the grown nations.

"Looks like I done my job well," Sealand said to himself. "Now, it's time for Finland's house!" And Sealand scurries away, holding a box filled with fortune cookies.

The End


Bet you thought it was Prussia or someone else who is that insane, huh? Well, I tricked you! *Throws millions of fortune cookies and a free Sealand plush doll to you!* Hope you enjoy this! Don't forget to share this with your friends!