The idea popped in my head and wouldn't go away until I put it on paper. A little something I'm working on with another author on here known as MsBlaze. Read it and if you like it let me know and we'll keep going with it.
Disclaimer: Wish i could say I owned south cause if I did... It'd still be on. But sadly I don't.
Spencer's POV
Do you believe that there's one person on this earth that you're meant to be with?
That no matter what you're supposed to end up with that person?
I didn't.
At least not 2 years ago.
But two years ago... I didn't know her.
I didn't know what it felt like.
Love that is.
You know that saying its better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all?...
Its bullshit.
Total and complete bullshit.
Fuck it!
A week ago
"You can't leave me. I don't know what I would do without you.." My words echo throughout the bedroom.
"I don't have a choice, my whole family is leaving. You know I don't wanna leave you. But what can I do?" I can see the tears starting to build in her eyes.
"It's all the way across the country." I state the obvious.
"I know." She says simply.
"I don't know... I'm not sure if I can live without you Ashley."
"Don't say that Spence." Ashley says wiping away the stray tears that I didn't even know were falling.
"I love you." I tell her.
She pulls me into a hug.
Her dad is honking and I know its time.
I'm not ready to let her go yet.
"I gotta go." She says placing a kiss on my forehead.
"Please Ash." I'm crying harder now.
And I told myself I wouldn't cry.
What a great job I'm doing at that.
"I'm sorry." She's crying hard too. "I love you too." She says before kissing me.
A kiss that I wanted to last forever.
I wished.
She let's me go and walks away.
I look out my window, watching as she gets into the car with her family.
A car that's gonna take her thousands of miles away from me.
Curse that fucking car.
I watch as she pulls away.
Away from my house.
Away from Los Angeles.
Away from the West Coast.
Away from me.
Present
"Spencer... Spencer... Spencer!"
"Oh crap, yeah? Sorry Mads."
"You didn't hear a word I said did you?" She asked flopping down on the bed next to me.
"No sorry."
"You've been so fucking depressing to be around lately. Like I know you miss your bitch and all but I mean I'm still here." She looks genuinely hurt.
I have been being a really bad friend to her.
To everyone really.
Not on purpose.
I just can't focus on anything but how much I miss Ashley.
"I'm sorry Mads. Tell me again." I say sitting up showing her that I'm giving her my undivided attention.
"No. I'm sorry. I'm being insensitive. I know how much you miss Ashley." She says giving me a comforting hug.
"It's just that it's been a whole week." I pause to let it soak in. "A whole week Mads and she hasn't even called me yet. Like she's forgotten about me already."
Maybe she didn't mean what she said.
Maybe she got to South Carolina and found someone else.
Maybe she wants to break up and is trying to find a way to tell me.
"Or maybe you're just making all that shit up in your head."
Huh?
"Did I say all that out-"
"The point is." She cuts me off. "Ashley fucking loves you and for you to even think for a second that she doesn't is crazy. She's probably just trying to adjust to being there without you the same way you're trying to adjust to being here without her. But at least you get to be in a familiar place with friends, out there she has no one. So just put yourself in her shoes."
Madison has a point.
Never thought I'd say that in my lifetime.
"When did you become the reasonable one?"
She shrugs.
"I got my moments." She says getting up. "I need to go pick up Jade from her cousins, so I'm gonna call you later."
"K."
"Okay." She says bending down and placing a kiss on my forehead. "And don't sit around looking so gloom. It's Friday for fucks sake. Get out and do something. Jade and I are going to dinner later. Want me to come get you?"
"No. You two have fun. I'm just gonna stay here and listen to my break-up mix Aiden made for me."
"But you and Ash-"
"I know." I say waving her off. "But for some reason listening to slow sad music makes me feel better."
"Pathetic." She says smiling as she walks out the door.
I grab my iPod off my nightstand and listen to it until I fall asleep.
My dreams are the only place I get to see her.
To touch her.
To feel her.
So lately I've been trying to dream as much as I can.
It's my only resolve.
Two years ago
"I was born in New York, but we've lived all over. My dad is in the service." Ashley said as her and Spencer walked along the beach.
"Oh wow. How do you deal with that?"
Ashley gives Spencer a questioning look.
"All the moving around I mean." Spencer clarifies.
"You get used to it." Ashley shrugs.
"I couldn't." Spencer starts, looking over at her. "Leaving all my friends behind. What about relationships? How do you make those last?"
"I usually just don't have them." Ashley says as they come to a bench and sit down.
"You've never had a relationship with anyone?" Spencer asks, unable to believe that Ashley has gone her whole life without ever falling in love.
"Nope."
"How is that even possible?" Spencer asks.
She couldn't imagine not ever having been intimate with someone.
Spencer had never been in love but she'd been intimate with people.
"Maybe I just haven't met the right person..." Ashley looks over at Spencer.
"Maybe.." Spencer smiles.
Present
"Spence wake up. Mom wants you to come down for dinner."
"Fuck Glen!" I yell in frustration.
"Whaaaat? Geez I'm just telling you what-"
"Just get out please." I say a little calmer.
I know, I know.
That was mean.
It's just... I was seeing her.
Talking to her.
Touching her.
In my dream.
In my dream... I had her.
And now she's gone again.
"Fine." Glen practically sprints out my bedroom door.
"Tell mom I'll be done in a minute." I yell after him.
I just want one more minute of her, I tell myself as I drift back off into my sleep.
Just one more minute.
I know the chapter is short but I wanted to make sure we had something worth reading before really getting into it so let me know what you think. REVIEW! Please... :)
