Conditions
By Bensler
Chapter 1 ~ Delayed
Baltimore/Washington Airport – Wednesday, December 23, 2009 – 7:12 p.m.
The weather was atrocious. She was stuck in Baltimore, Maryland and all she wanted was to get home. It had been a long week at a national conference on Violence Against Women. The conference was open to the public Friday night, Saturday and Sunday, but the last three days had been for law enforcement personnel. She and her counterpart from the Brooklyn SVU were among the many speakers invited to share their experiences. The two detectives had cited the statistics of crimes against women and recounted a few of the personal stories of some of the victims they had met.
The departure time for her flight had been 5:20 p.m. yet here she sat in the airport waiting. The flight had already been delayed for almost two hours because of the high winds and now the speaker system crackled with a new announcement that it was now delayed indefinitely because of the sleet.
Detective Fran Jordan traded groans and grimaces with Olivia. She pulled her cell phone from her waist and looked over at her sister in blue. "I'm calling Janine to tell her we need a place crash. We'll catch a flight in the morning, okay?"
Olivia had met Janine, Fran's best friend from high school, two nights ago at dinner. She was a lot of fun and Olivia felt like she had known her forever. Her husband was an ER doctor who worked nights and their three kids were on their own or off at college so the big home was pretty empty now. She'd have plenty of room for them both.
Olivia pondered the invitation, but decided against it. "Uh…thanks, but I think I'm just going to wait it out. I really want to get home," Olivia replied with a smile.
"You sure? Flying out doesn't sound very promising tonight ."
"Maybe, maybe not." She would take her chances. This was the first holiday in years she had someone special to spend it with and she was not about to call him and change their plans for Christmas Eve.
Just a minute later Fran closed the phone. "Okay…one last time…you coming with me or staying?"
"Staying. You and Janine have fun. " Olivia stood as Fran picked up her coat and pulled her suitcase to her side.
"Can't say I blame you…if I had a hot guy like you have waiting on me, I'd want to get back, too."
"Shut up, Fran." Olivia teasingly shoved her shoulder. "I'll walk with you back to security."
Unable to find a seat in the crowded waiting area when she returned from walking Fran to security, Olivia stood at the window watching the blinking lights of various planes as they rolled slowly by. Though several were still sitting on the tarmac none were taking off or landing. As much as she hated waiting she was thankful she was inside and not stuck on a stuffy airplane cramped into a small seat.
It was time to call and let him know she was going to be later than expected.
"Hey."
"Hey, yourself. You back?"
"No. Still in DC. Flight's been delayed indefinitely. Just wanted to let you know it
may be really late when I get in, so I'll just catch a taxi home."
"No, no. I don't care what time it is…you call me."
"I don't want to impose on you…"
"You won't be imposing."
"You sure?"
"Yes, I'm sure. I want to see you," he assured her.
"Really?" She knew he was being truthful, but she just needed to hear him say it again
" You have any idea how much I've missed you these last six days?"
She smiled at this because she knew exactly how he felt because she had missed him, too. "As a matter of fact, I think I do."
"That mean you missed me?"
"I don't think I even have to answer that, do I?"
His laugh was deep and warm. "I'll take that as resounding yes!"
They talked for several more minutes before hanging up.
After another hour passed Olivia had run out of patience. Not that she had much to start with anyway. She made her way to the restroom to use the facilities and freshen up. Then she followed her nose to Starbucks and got a hot tea and a couple of sugar cookies. Dragging her carry-on suitcase she began her trek back to the waiting area.
Stabler Residence - Manhattan - Wednesday, December 23, 2009 – 11:31 p.m.
As usual his sleep was fitful. Though it had been four months since he and Kathy split he just could not seem to get used to so much quiet. He had dozed off in the recliner watching a hockey game on ESPN. Though the volume was muted he was certain some sound had stirred him from his light sleep. He sat up and stretched, scrubbed his hands over his face and yawned. Then he heard it. Knocking. Someone was at his door. He glanced at clock over the dining table – 11:31. Not many people knew his new address. Not many people knew he and Kathy were divorced. If this were Olivia…
Making his way to the door, he shouted out, "Yeah, yeah. Who is it?"
"Elliot, open the door."
At the sound of the familiar voice, his heart was instantly in his throat. This was not good. He jerked the door open. "Captain?"
He stared at Donald Cragen, his wool coat, scarf and knit cap covered in a dusting of snow, his cheeks red from the cold. Cragen had never come to his house. In eleven years he could not remember one single time Cragen had come to his house like this – unannounced and uninvited.
In just a split second every scenario ran through his mind – one of the kids was in an accident; one of his girls had been raped; Rick had been shot; Eli had been kidnapped; Kathy was hurt. For some reason it never occurred to him that something had happened to the one other person whom he loved. Because he would not let his mind go there. Because she could not be hurt; nothing could happen to her. Not now.
"My kids? Kathy?" He was aware of how it hurt to breathe as he struggled to put his thoughts into words.
Cragen was shaking his head. "They're fine."
Confusion filled Elliot's features and his eyes narrowed as he looked at his commanding officer. "Then what? We got a case? You never …"
Cragen interrupted, "You know Olivia's flight number?"
Elliot frowned and started to say something, but then ran his hands over his head. "Why?"
"Do you know her flight number?" The captain's voice was gruff and the words clipped.
"Yeah, it's…uh…uh…" Suddenly his mind went blank. He had the number memorized earlier. Why couldn't he think of it now? Why'd the captain want her flight number? Elliot stood there blinking at Captain Cragen.
"You have an itinerary?"
Elliot thought the captain should already have that information. "Don't you have all that?"
Cragen sighed deeply. "At work. I'm on my way to…uh…the…uh…Elliot, do you know her flight number?"
Elliot went to the kitchen and rummaged through a stack of papers on the counter. "Here…it's 1359."
Cragen looked shell-shocked. "What?" Elliot demanded every sense now on high alert.
The lump in his throat blocked any words that might have otherwise found their way out of his mouth so instead, the captain made his way to the living room and picked up the remote to the television.
"Captain! Captain, what is it?" Elliot trailed behind him now deeply concerned.
Turning to channel 2, the scene that filled the screen was one of utter pandemonium and chaos. Flashing emergency lights of the fire engines, ambulances and police cars; the sounds of voices hollering commands and instructions; the cloud of smoke coming from the front end of an airplane. The words of the reporter registered only enough for Elliot to vaguely understand what had happened. His mind was shutting down in order to protect him. It simply would not make the connection to what he was seeing and hearing on the television to Olivia's flight. Even the continuous scrawl across the bottom of the screen made no sense.
The words of the reporter droned in his ears – 'To recap this breaking story, Delta flight 1359 in route from Baltimore Washington International to LaGuardia has crashed along the banks of Flushing Bay. Details are still sketchy but NTSB officials already on the scene have said that weather is certainly a factor. The flight had been delayed for several hours due to high winds and freezing rain. No word as of yet concerning survivors or fatalities. Stay tuned for ongoing coverage. This is Dana Maxwell for WCBS-TV.'
Racing heart, rapid breathing, tightness in his chest, nausea, perspiration – he must be having a heart attack. This could not be happening. This was not her flight. He had talked to her just a few hours ago. She was fine. She was coming home. To him. Oh, dear God. Please…please, he prayed.
"Elliot, get dressed. We'll go to the site. Munch and Fin are covering the hospitals in case she's there."
Hospitals? In case she's there? Who's there? Olivia, he wondered? Like an automaton Elliot did as he was told. He dressed in no time flat and slipped on his gloves and hat as he followed Cragen out of the apartment building.
On the drive to the crash site each man was lost in his own thoughts and they rode in silence.
Elliot kept thinking about her – his partner. He envisioned her through the years – the rookie SVU detective determined to make it in a man's world. She was an experienced cop yet naïve when it came to the kinds of crimes the Special Victims Unit worked. She wanted to make a difference; help victims. She wanted to keep others from letting traumatic events from taking over their lives. In essence she hoped to give these victims back their lives.
He had been aggravated that he had been stuck with a female partner, but from the moment they met he sensed an odd connection with the dark haired, brown eyed woman. As time went on he saw her confidence and competence and he trusted her like he had trusted no one in his life. Ever. In a short time she had become the only one who seemed to get him, to understand the workings of his mind and emotions. She was not only his partner; she was his best friend. And recently they had been moving onto yet another level. If he lost her now…
Cragen could not get Olivia's smile out of his head. He remembered last Friday morning when she had come to his office to give him all the information about the conference and where she would be staying. He had joked with her that she better be home as soon as possible or she'd be speaking at the 'Violence Against Police Captains' conference because he wasn't at all sure how he was going to deal with Elliot while she was gone for nearly a week.
She had blushed at this comment and he told her not to be so shy. It was obvious something had changed between her and Elliot. When he told her it was about time the two of them came to their senses, her beautiful smile broke across her face and she seemed to glow. In spite of the circumstances now facing them, he grinned at the memory of her brilliant smile.
Then glancing at Elliot, his somber mood returned.
LaGuardia Airport - Queens - Wednesday, December 24, 2009 – 12:40 a.m.
Giving their names and flashing badges, Cragen and Elliot pushed through the crowd to find the lead NTSB agent. Elliot felt a smidgen of relief to hear the shrill of departing ambulances and to see there were survivors being tending to by EMTs. He scanned the scene hoping and praying that he would see Olivia.
Approaching the man they were told was in charge of the investigation, Cragen extended his hand as he spoke. "Captain Don Cragen, NYPD." He nodded toward Elliot, "Detective Elliot Stabler. His partner was on this flight. Anyway we can find out about her?"
"Jim Vandiver. Captain, Detective…I'm sorry but chances aren't real good that it will be a positive outcome. You sure you want to know?"
Cragen felt Elliot tense even more though he was already wound about as tight as possible. He reached out and put a hand on Elliot's shoulder. "Yes. We need to know."
Vandiver nodded and motioned them to follow him. He went to the back of a white van that had National Transportation Safety Board emblazoned in blue across it. Opening the door he reached for an accordion style folder, flipped through it and pulled out some papers that had been printed on banner style paper.
"What's her name?"
"Benson. Olivia Benson." Cragen answered as he cast a quick look at Elliot. His face was like stone but his eyes were in turmoil.
"Arnett, Axton, Bashinski, Belmont…here it is…Benson, Olivia. Seat 24A. She was supposed to be on here."
Elliot didn't miss the wording. "What do you mean supposed to be?"
"This is just the passenger manifest stating who had reservations. It doesn't prove whether or not said passenger boarded."
Elliot felt a small measure of relief but wished he knew for sure. "When will you know for sure?"
"When they're finished doing the body count…" Vandiver's words trailed off.
Body count? Body count. Once again Elliot felt like he was having a heart attack. He stood there staring grimly at Vandiver, willing himself not to lose it and pass out.
Cragen asked, "How long will that take?"
"Not sure. Plane seats 110 and it was at capacity with Christmas and all. Come on. One of my men is keeping a list of victims that have been taken to surrounding hospitals."
They followed Jim Vandiver about a hundred feet to another van and waited as he talked with another man. When he came back to them the look on his face said everything. Elliot held his breath.
"Sorry…but Detective Benson is not listed as having been taken to a hospital."
"Maybe she lost her ID. Maybe she could say who she was. Do they have positive IDs on all those transported?" Cragen held out hope that somehow the worst had not happened.
"That I don't…" Vandiver began but was interrupted.
"Jim!" Two more agents were walking toward them. The shorter of the two was waving some papers. "Got an update on the passengers."
"Let's have it."
"Thirty-eight have been taken to area hospitals; fourteen are still being cared for onsite; Fifty-four are deceased and four are still unaccounted for and assumed to be in the bay."
No sooner had he spoken these words than shouts went up at the waters' edge. The taller man ran over to see what was going on. Minutes later he returned.
"They found four more bodies."
Vandiver looked at Cragen and Elliot. "You want to look over what we go to see if your detective is among them?"
Cragen swallowed hard and shot a glance at Elliot. He exuded tension. "Elliot?"
Elliot couldn't look at Cragen. If he did, he would know that Elliot would die without her; she gave him a reason to live. He would be restless without her; she was the only one who could calm his spirit. He couldn't do this job without her by his side because she was his strength. Without her, he would go crazy; for she was his stability.
Giving a slight nod, Elliot started toward the row of body bags, each step heavier; each step that much closer to his own insanity.
eoeoeoeoeo
