Their Unique Situation

Sorry for the corny story title. I do love alliteration. It will make sense eventually, however, it will take five or six chapters, maybe more. But trust me. It will be worth it when it does. I don't own anything Charles Dickens wrote. Well, I do, but I don't own the rights to them. But aren't they public domain by now? Questions, questions, questions. . .enjoy!


"Boss! Vance wants you in his office. He said it was urgent. Special Agent DiNozzo, sir, did you hear me?"

Tony waited a second longer before turning around to head-slap his probie agent Ryan Summerton, a round-faced boy of twenty-seven who, if his perky, eager-to-please attitude was any indication, could be Abby's long lost brother. Ryan's eyes crossed for a second, which for him was an unfortunate side effect of being head-slapped, because it meant that DiNozzo derived still more amusement in doing it.

"That's very Special Agent DiNozzo to you. I'm going, Probie-ton. Relax. Breath." He approached the young man who was standing nearly at attention and muttered in his ear. "Chillll."

"G-g-got it. Got it." Agent Summerton stammered with a quick smile at the end, trying to appear less nervous. The young agent retreated to the desk of his partner, Special Agent Whitney Yuri.

Tony leapt up the stairs in the middle of the bullpen two at a time, pausing to scan the room. Not much had changed in the last couple of years. His eyes focused on the very center, studying the grey-haired man who leaned over a desk as he fired questions at another agent who was furiously typing while providing answers, all without missing a key. The scene was achingly familiar. His eyes darted to the desk in the corner, the desk at which usually sat the reason all this was no longer his.

Ziva wasn't there. Tony didn't think twice about it; she was probably out on assignment or on a coffee run or in the bathroom. Tony resisted the urge to go check the bathroom as the meaning of the word "urgent" popped into his head in the form of Abby's usual, annoying definition. "Urgent, Tony! I mean, like, NOW!"

"Like, NOW!" had passed fifteen minutes ago. Vance would be angry, but Vance would get over it. Vance always did.

Tony slipped into Vance's office without knocking, earning a glare from his superior. "Glad you could join us, Special Agent DiNozzo. This is important." Tony glanced around the room, and his eyes met the gaze of the woman beside him. Ziva.

Tony's eyes scanned Ziva's, and hers did the same to his. Both were questioning, greeting, playful - all at the same time. Vance fidgeted uncomfortably. He felt as if he was intruding on something private, intimate. "DiNozzo. David!" He called out, as much to end the uncomfortable gaze that was being shared between his two agents as anything.

"I have a crucial assignment for the two of you. Might I stress that this is of vital importance to the welfare of our nation and several of our allies. It is high-risk, high-commitment and. . ."

"Wait up a second," Tony cut in. Ziva shot him a look at his extreme disrespect in interrupting a superior who was giving an order. "I thought that we were forbidden from working together. You split up our team and everything because of that!"

"Agent DiNozzo. First, I make the rules, I can change the rules. Second, I did not split up your team, I promoted you and gave you a new team. Third, this mission calls for agents in your unique situation. Trust me, we searched through all our personnel. Nobody fits this assignment better than the two of you."

"Our unique situation," Ziva rolled her eyes.

Vance was getting tired of the jokes. His voice firmer, he said. "Yes, David. This is a deep undercover operation that requires two operatives, one of Middle Eastern origins" he nodded at her, "and one, a stereotypical, white American."

"I am the American Dream," Tony winked at Ziva, his excitement rising. He had thought he never would be able to go on an assignment with her again.

"This operation requires you to establish a home in Lebanon and and also establish amicable relations with several terrorist groups of the surrounding region. Ziva, you will be you...except you won't be. You will be a former Mossad officer who has spent long periods of time working with the American military, long enough periods of time to meet your husband, a psychology professor at Georgetown University with a PhD. They will trust you to pass them old pieces of intel, which we will ensure seem to be valuable but in fact are worthless. More importantly to them, however, you will know the intricate structure of Mossad, the Israeli Defense Forces, and the American Armed forces. You will understand unspoken rules between those who seem, to them, to be equals. You will know the breaking point of seemingly unbreakable soldiers. Your husband, skilled at the art of making psychological profiles, will be of great use. You will be master manipulators."

Tony and Ziva just blinked and stared at each other for a few seconds. Then Tony said, a touch of uncertainty in his voice, "Well, director, wouldn't they know the second our "master manipulation" didn't actually do anything that we weren't for real?"

Vance shook his head. "It is a complex operation. We will ensure you seem indispensable."

Tony seemed convinced, but Ziva still looked confused. "Vance, I still do not understand why our "unique situation," as you so eloquently put it" she added sarcastically, "is required for this mission. "Anyone can pretend to be married-"

"-we've done it," Tony cut in.

"Yes," Ziva affirmed. She wasn't sure if she liked the idea of living so close to Israel again, and even less the idea of pretending to aid terrorists. "Why must it be us? If it is just because we are actually married-"

"Agent David, when I say "deep undercover", I mean deep undercover. This mission will be long. You will have to give up your entire lives at the present and for many years into the future. This means your friends, your homes, your identities. At least with the two of you, you will share the solitude with each other, and are less likely to slip, therefore, in your acting."

"Wow," Tony muttered. "That's mighty generous of you, Director." He looked straight into Vance's eyes. "I'm not buying it."

Vance returned his gaze. "There is one more thing. They will want to ensure you are who you say you are. They will have surveillance everywhere." Tony smiled, knowing where this was going. "They will require proof that I cannot order other agents, unmarried agents, to give. And I know very well that you two have no qualms about being intimate in public."

"Hey hey hey!" Tony interjected. "If this is about the Ranier mission, I've told everybody. Nothing happened! We were acting."

"I am not talking about the Ranier mission, DiNozzo."

Ziva grinned at Tony and winked.

"Oh. That."


NCIS is about as mine as it is real. So yes, it is not mine. I'm sorry if that burst anyone's bubble.

Before you ask, this story is not going in the direction you think it is going in. Most of this story is actually going to be set twenty years in the future (but I'll keep Tony in shape so he'll be just as handsome then :D). I know this begins like many other stories (undercover mission as married people, recalling under covers, etc.) but just bear with me. It is necessary to take the story where it needs to go and trust me, it will be nice and original. (I hope! I haven't read all the fanfictions out there for NCIS!) About the rating, I really don't know how violent this might get. It might stay very K, K+, or it might venture well into T. I am going to make it T for safety now but it may very well prove it later. It will never be M though. I don't write smut. Sorry or you're welcome, whichever is appropriate.

Yes, Ziva kept her surname.

To my "Memories of a Monster" readers, I know I've slowed down. It's just that that is a dark story, and this is happier, at least for now. So this is my "I'm in a good mood story" and that is my "I'm in a bad mood story" and they will get updated as such.

Alrighty then, reviews make me happy, and this is my "I'm in a good mood story." See how this works! So review please!