Can We Go Streaking?!
Disclaimer: Do I really have to?
Kishimoto: Yes! Share my success with the whole world!
Disclaimer: Fine. I, me, you, us, do not own Naruto-
Kishimoto: Say it...
Disclaimer: *Sighs deeply* Kishimoto sadly does...
Enjoy you diabolical nerds and fangirls o.o
Chapter One: Arrival!
"Tobi have to use the bathroom!" Tobi whined for the FIFTH time.
Deidara's eye twitched as his grip on the wheel got tighter. "We've stopped four times, five minuets apart," He said through gritted teeth.
Zetsu patted Tobi's head then turned to Deidara, "With children you have to be patient." Zetsu then turned back to Tobi, "Listen you little fuck, be a good boy and hold your pee."
Tobi nodded, "Tobi will because Tobi is a good boy."
"Maybe your becoming inpatient, like that red-head you fuck." Zetsu laughed.
Sasori, who was sitting in the front seat couldn't hear a word Zetsu said because of his headphones, that was blasting music into his ears.
Deidara's eye twitched, "Fuck. You. I. Said. And Never Will Be. Gay."
"Sure. That's what Hidan said about him and Kakuzu." Zetsu snickered then his white part forced him to frown.
Deidara's foot slammed on the break, "What, un?!" He spun his head around.
"Kidding, Hidan is not gay. And it's rude to call someone something there not." Zetsu smiled again.
"Get it moving, brat." Sasori mumbled, eyeing his phone.
Deidara 'hmph' before moving on, just to stop again.
"Listen brat, what part of moving on do you not understand?" Sasori asked in a pissed tone.
"Sasori, my man, we are at the beach house, yeah." Deidara got of his car while Zetsu helped Tobi with his seatbelt.
They grabbed there stuff out the trunk and moved to the front door.
Deidara stuck his hand in his pocket, finding what he was looking for, he placed the key in the key hole and opened the door.
"Woah, this place is...fucking gigantic." Zetsu said, amazed.
"Couldn't have said it any better, hmm." Deidara muttered, scanning the place.
In the middle of the room was a huge white couch, in the center of the floor was a rug, which a coffee table hovered over, on the wall hung a 50' inch flat screen.
On the left of the room as the kitchen, on the right was the stairs to the bedrooms.
"FUCK!"
The four jumped at the sudden out-burst. Guess someone got here before them.
"YOU SON OF A BITCH! EAT A DICK!"
Oh yeah, they know that voice...
Hidan.
"SHUT UP BEFORE I PUSH YOU DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!" The other voice was clearly annoyed, and was known as Kakuzu's voice.
"YOU WISH YOU FUCKING OLD-MISER!"
The next thing they heard was thumps. They looked towards the stairs to see Hidan tumbling down the stairs, naming every swear word in the book.
Following him down, was Kakuzu (He didn't have a mask on, and he had no stitches on his mouth, only on his body.). His arms were crossed against his chest as his face held a pissed off vibe.
"Awe, fuck. You actually had the balls to do it," Hidan muttered as he rubbed his head in pain.
He then spotted the four and grinned.
"My bitches! What's up!" He waved.
"Hidan...fucker." They all said and black Zetsu added something. They were all used to Hidan's foul mouth...even sometimes it gets him into situations like when Kakuzu just pushed him down the stairs. Which was weird; he never seem to get injured badly when he's always getting injured.
"Hn." Kakuzu nodded at them then walked pass Hidan.
"Is any one else here?" Sasori asked Kakuzu.
"No, but Itachi called and said he was on his way-"
Deidara was slightly outraged, "Who invited that emo bastard?"
Sasori chuckled slightly. "Still pissed when he called your art 'stupid' and when he simply said, 'I don't care.'? He was right on it being stupid." Sasori smirked.
"Art is fleeing, art is a bang! Un!" Deidara challenged.
"Ugh, stupid brat. Art is everlasting, art is eternal."
"A BANG!"
"Eternal, brat."
"A BIG EXPLOSION! BANG! YEAH!"
"Eternal," Sasori was getting ticked off.
"A BANG!"
"Eternal," Sasori said louder.
"Bang, hmm." Deidara made sound effects.
"ETERNAL!" Sasori snapped.
"A BANG!"
"Talking about your pathetic art?" A monotone voice was heard from the door.
Itachi and Kisame walked in.
"Awe, were late! I told you we should of never stopped for that damn Dango!" Kisame let there luggage onto the floor.
Then Itachi did something VERY out of character, he grabbed Kisame's collar and stood on his tippy-toes for his height to match his. "Never, ever...speak shit of Dango again."
He then grabbed his luggage and went up stairs, passing Hidan.
"What crawled up his ass and died, yeah?" Deidara asked Kisame.
"Uchiha Pride." Was his simple answer.
"It's not his fault, he cant help himself. But Tobi here...is a different story," Sasori looked around the room, looking for the orange-masked idiot.
"Oh no! We lost him, un!" Deidara panicked, Pein told him, him personally, to watch after him.
"Lost who...?" A feminine voice was heard at the door.
Konan.
And where there is a Konan...
There is a Pein.
"Yes? Who did you lose Deidara?" Pein's voice sent chills up his spine.
"Eh, nothing..." He backed away to the kitchen to find Tobi, inhaling skittles, jolly ranchers, and chocolate.
He then threw the wrappers on the ground and downed a liter of Pepsi.
"Fuck, un! Run!" Deidara ran out of the kitchen.
"What's wrong with you brat?" Sasori asked.
"Tobi's going on a sugar rush!" Deidara called out as he ran to the door.
Pein shook his head then asked if Itachi was here.
"Yeah." Kisame replied.
"ITACHI! THIS IS A CODE T! NOT A DRILL!" Everyone looked at Pein weirdly, before turning there attention to a certain Uchiha who just slid down on the rails by the stairs, holding a needle.
"Where is he?" He asked.
Tobi came rushing out the door, "TOBI IS SUPERMAN! WEEE! NOW TOBI IS BATMAN! RAWWR! NOW TOBI IS TOBI! NEVER FEAR TOBI IS HERE!" Tobi rambled, running in circles.
Itachi chased him, until he got close enough to jab Tobi with the needle.
Tobi went limp as he passed out on the floor.
"Well...damn. This is going to be one hell of a summer..." Kisame laughed sheepishly as he rubbed the back of his neck.
"Good thing I got my camera," Konan sang.
"NO!" The men groaned, trying to reach for the camera.
"Fuck! This is going to be so fucking shitty." Hidan cursed.
"Agreed, this is utter bull shit, un." Deidara crossed his arms over his chest.
"Quiet! We will have a good time like we did last year." Pein said, silencing everyone but Konan.
"You know...leaving out the fires, drugs, and bar fights..." She said, counting on her fingers.
"Drugs?" Hidan repeated.
"Pein and Kakuzu were so high they could touch the sky," Deidara snickered, earning a hit from Sasori.
"Awe, fuck you Danna."
"He'll leave that to you," Zetsu snickered also.
Pein dead-panned...
"On second thought..."
Konan finished for him...
"This vacation is going to be the most dumbest shit we'd ever thought of."
END OF CHAPTER!
Review :) More funny chapters ahead!
Me: Review...Itachi will give you some dango.
Itachi: If you fucking touch my dango I'll sharingan your ass.
Me: Eh, on second thought, have Tobi's kitty.
Tobi: MEH KITTY!
Me: I give up...
