A/N: This is my first fanfic! I wrote it over lunch and my friend Liz betad it! Thanks Lizzie! ^_^ Please R&R, no flames, only constructive criticism, please.

It was another off-day at the zoo, and Kowalski had made another disastrous device. He had destoryed the lemur habitat and until it was repaired, the lemurs had to stay with the penguins. As they did not have anough bunks to accomodate everyone, Skipper had to vacate his bunk for King Julian. He hadn't wanted to, but the King could be quite demanding, and he considered it another hardship of service/leadership. Another hardship of leadership was growing in his sex. The lemur's alluring buttocks shook regularly in that lustful dance of his, and Skipper could not restrain himself any longer. Pushing the lemur to the side, he conquered his lips with his beak, and caressed his hips with his fins! Julian let out a moan. He knew his plan would be effective, but how effective it was! Skipper had fallen head ofver flippers for him, and he would enjoy himself to the fullest. As oceans of lust raged against each other, raged hard, the lovers quickly realized that they were not alone. Around them slept 3 other penguins, and 2 lemurs! It was as though a squad had stepped into a minefield, thought Skipper, every step inexorably taking them to doom! They tried to silence their passions, but to no avail; like a volcano approaching eruption, they had no control over their privates, as they had no cotntorl over Private. He awoke with a shock at their shieks of lust! He looked tenderly at them. "Oh, Skipper, you didn't have to hide anything from me!" He walked off quickly, leaving them to their activity, intending to prepare breakfast fish for everyone, and perhaps breakfast fish for many days to come, because he didn't want anyone to get malnutrition. Skipper thought to himself, as he re-regales himself in the embrace of his lemur lover, of Private's concern for the squad. What a trooper! Why, if he wasn't engaging his "trooper" at that time with his soul-mate Julian, he might have taken a shine to the motherly penguin - but alas, the King ruled his heart. Oh, his ringed tail, waving of its own accord! Oh, the dark cricles around his eyes! His soft fur, unlike anything a penguin could offer! Oh his voice, exotically accented, ringing into the night! His leaf hat flapped softly in the night, as did other parts. Kowalski, awakened by Ring-Tail's screams of passion, was not surprised at their joining. Despite having a seemingly antagonistic relationship, he knew they were perfect for each other. As serious as Skipper was, Julian was flippant. As Confucious said, opposites attract! Kowalski whipped out his pair of earmuffs (A/N: they were in hammerspace!) to give the lovebirds some privacy, and rolled over, satisfied of his leader's satisfaction.

The next mourning they awoke surprised to find their bodies wntwined. It hadn't been a dream? It haad been a reality? The room was empyt and they stepped out, playing like nothing had happened maybe nobody would realize the sudden development. At the table Kowalski had an awkward grin and avioded eye contact. Private brought everybody some fish to eat, and sneakily winked at Skipper. Julian played cool even though his hat had been awkwardly bent during their roaring night of passion. The only one absent was Rico and the two lemurs. Julian slipped away, ostensibly to watch the reconstruction of his habitat, but Skipper knew he never wanted it fixed, so he could spend his eternity in the heaven that was. Bunk.

fin