Hey guys. Hope you like this.
Warning: self harm, eating disorder, and slightly ooc characters.
I do not own Shake it Up. I am mearly borrowing them.
RRRIING~ RRRIING~ RRRING~
"Ughh" groaned the lump under the covers. Slowly a hand crept out from under the blankets and smacked the alarm clock. She rolled over and snuggled deeper into the warm covers.
"CECE!" yelled an annoying voice from outsite said girls room. Cece groaned and covered her head with her pillow. ~maybe if I ignore him he'll go away~ she thought. "CECE!" ~go away~ " Cece, if you dont get up I'm coming in" the annoying person threatened ~why wont he go away, I just want to sleep~ She groaned and pressed the pillow over her head harder. "I'm comeing in" She heard her door open, but it barely registered it in her still half asleep state. Suddenly she felt someone grab the blankets aand roughly pull them off her, pulling her off the bed in the process seeing as she was completly tangled in them. She let out a yelp of pain as her poor bottom came in contact with the hard floor.
"ow" She groaned. She looked up to come face to face with her smirking step-brother. Oh how she wished she could wipe that smirk of his face. He was so full of himself. He was always making fun of her and insulting her. Calling her selfish, ugly, mean, selfcentered, a quiter and stupid. The last one stung everytime. It's wasnt her fault she was so stupid.
"Good morning Sissy" He said, that stupid smirk still in place.
"Don't know whats so good about it." Cece muttered.
"My dad and Georgia want us all in the kitchen for a family breakface. I sugest you get your lazy ass of the floor and get ready." he turned to leave but stopped at the door. He turned slightly "oh, and try not to take too long. I know it take forever to make your ugly face presentable, but try to hurry up" he left closing the door behind him.
Cece sighed and leaned against her bed, willing away the tears that had gathered at the corners of her eyes. You see the boy, her step-brother, was Logan. She and Logan had met at the food court. He had offered her and her best friend a job and they had accepted seeing as shake it up was off the air kus the set had burned down. She had quickly learned that the kabob life wasnt for her. She ended up quiting. Later that night she had found out that he was the son of the dude her mom was dating. That very day Jeremy had proposed to her mom. Things had gone down hill from there. Logan and her constantly bickered. Then their parents got married and he was there picking fights with her from dawn to dust. See, here's the thing. Cece doesn't have the best self esteem. She's constantly put down by her mom, her friends, her teachers. She didn't need to be reminded that she was stupid. Well. Cece could handle dealing with Logan a few times a day. She had always had time to pick herself up before she had to see him again. But now, now she had to deal with him the whole time. From when she woke up to when she went to bed. His constant insults were bringing her down. They had been living together for about six months now. Slowly Logans comments had started to have their effect. She had slowly fallen into a depression of sorts. She felt like if she wasnt careful the darkness would close in on her.
Cece sighed and got up. The only thing she liked about the situation was her new room. her room was fairly large seeing as it used to be the basement. The Room was square. The wall to the left was painted black while the other three were painted turquoise. On the black wall in the center of the upper half of the wall hung zebra print large letters that spelled out 'CECE' under that was her queen size bed. it had a simple white wooden frame, the comforter was zebra print. There were 4 square pillows against the headboard with three turquoise ones infront of them. at the foot of her bed was a black folded blanket. on either side of her bed were white nightstands with black lamps on it. the nightstand to the right had a picture of her and Rocky at Shake it Up Chicago in a turquoise fram with crystals. Infront of it in a smaller black and turquoise zebra print frame was a picture of her and Flynn. On her left nightstand in a simple black frame was a picture of her mom holding her as a baby. across the room was a white wooden vanity table. Above the vanity table was a large oval mirror. the backless white wooden chair had a turquoise plush seat. scattered across the vanity table were her make up suplys and her hair products and her accesories. across the floor was a furry black carpet. against the last remaining wall was a large white wardrobe.
Cece sighed and sat infront of her vanity. Her vanity had a little secret drawer. She opened the drawer and looked inside. The conetents were slightly disturbing: A bloody razor, a roll of bandages, some cotton balls, disenfectant, and a pair of scissors. She sighed and rolled up the sleave of her baggy sweater revealing scars, healing cuts, and cuts that looked like they had been made barely a few hours ago. She picked up a cotton ball and soaked it with some disenfectant and pressed it to her cuts, hissing as she felt the sting. She carefully cleaned each cut. Last night she had made 5 cuts. she threw the cotton ball in the trash bin under her vanity and took out the bandages covering the cuts. she put away everything and closed the small drawer. Sighing she got up and went to her wardrobe picking out that days outfit. She put on a pair of black covered denim jeans; a long strappy red tank top. she put on a cropped long sleeve black top. it had 'I HEART DANCE' across it. he heart was a red heart that looked like chipped nail polish. on her feet she wore a pair of black wedge trainers. The shoes had four buckles on the front and one at the heel. she went to her vanity and put on black winged eyeliner and mascaramaking her eyelashes look super long. she, straightened her hair and put on a red fedora. A dab of clear gloss and she ws ready to go.
- In the kitchen.
Flynn, Logan and Jeremy sat at the kitchen table waiting for Georgia to finish making breakfast. Believe it or not but she had learned to cook so she could cook for her new family.
"Why is Cece taking so long" whined Flynn.
"Probaly busy making sure every single hair is in the right place" said Logan.
"Logan!" said Jeremy. "you shouldnt talk about your sister like that." Logan just rolled his eyes and turned to look at Cece who had just entered the kitchen. He watched as she picked up her ipod and stuck the buds in her ears, muttering a quick good moring at everyone.
~she thinks she's too good to even talk with her family.~ thought Logan frowning.
Cece looked through her ipod before deciding to just put it on shuffle. She closed her eyes and listened to the music trying to forget the fact that Logan was sitting next to her.
Is there a right way for how this goes?
You got your friends, and you got your foes.
They want a piece of something hot,
Forget your name like they forgot.
Ain't that something?
Cece hated how well she could relate to the lyrics. She felt like no matter what she did she couldnt't do anything right. People she thought were her friends sometimes were the one that hurt her the most. She felt like sometime not even Rocky had time for her. Wouldn't be the first time Rocky's forgotten about her in favor of something else.
So I wanna see you crash and burn,
And criticize your every word
They wouldn't have to wait long, she could just feel how she was slowly wasting away, how she was so close to breaking down. Her teachers would tear her down whenever she said something in class, her friends would make fun at whatever she said and if she ever had and idea they just wrote if off as being too stupid to work.
I'm tryna keep from goin' insane,
Ain't that the way of this whole damn thing?
Trying to be something, more.
she was barely holding on to her sanity, she was so close to the edge it wasnt even funny. she speant most of her time trying to keep herself from breaking down, trying to become someone everyone would want to hang out with.
Nobody's gonna love you if,
You can't display, a way to capture this.
Nobody's gonna hold your hand,
And guide you through,
No, it's up for you to understand.
Nobody's gonna feel your pain,
When all is done,
And it's time for you to walk away.
She felt alone. like no one cared. As if no one is willing to be near her if she doesnt have anything to offer them. None of them understand. none. they dont know the pain she goes through daily. She wondered what Logan would think if he knew he brough her so close to the brink every day.
So when you have today,
You should say all that you have to say.
Say all that you have to say.
She wished she was brave enough to speak out. but she was just so afraid, and she didnt even know why she was so afraid.
Is there a right way for being strong?
Feels like I'm doing things all wrong.
Still I'm here just holdin' on,
Confess my heart and forgive my wrongs.
Just tryna show you someth-
The song was cut off as she felt her mom yank her headphones from her ears.
"you know the rule Cece, no phones, ipods, laptops or electronic devices of any kind at the table. Meal times are family times" her mom told her.
"Yeah Sissy" said Logan "don't you want to pay attention to your loving family" he said as he took a big bite of eggs. Maybe if they were so loving they would notice how she barely took three bites of food and spent the whole time pushing it around.
~some loving family~
Hey guys. hope you liked it. Review please. they make me happy, nd when I'm happy I update. But seriously. let me know what you think.
