A/N: This is just a one shot about what was going through Chuck's mind in that completely heart wrenching scene at the very end of episode 5x03 where he is crying on his bed after Blair tells him she's pregnant.
"They say it's a broken heart, but I hurt in my whole body"
She was pregnant.
She was having another mans child.
He hadn't believed it before.
None of it had seemed real.
None of it.
Not the fact that they were over.
Not the fact that she was with someone else;
Marrying someone else.
But now, there was no way he couldn't see it.
Because the facts were that there was a Harry Winston rock on Blair Waldorf's left ring finger, but it wasn't Chuck Bass's ring.
In the same way it wasn't Chuck Bass's unborn child she was now carrying.
He'd lost her.
And it was now real.
All of a sudden, everything came crashing in.
All the pain, physical and emotional, that he had been unable to feel since he'd let Blair go in the spring, suddenly washed over him in torrents.
He had lost her.
"You're mine"
He had said that to her once.
Maybe it had been in the midst of a drunken stupor, but by god had he meant it.
In that moment he had honestly believed it.
He had honestly thought that, while she may have been engaged, she would never really go through with it.
And that in the end, it would be his ring she'd wind up wearing.
But now it was official.
It was really over.
And he had lost her.
She was gone and now, he was never getting her back.
And that tore him apart.
"There was a part of me that really wanted it to be yours"
That's what Blair had said before she left.
She'd wanted it to be his.
But that would've ruined your fairytale he thought lamely.
That should've made him happy, shouldn't it?
The idea that she'd wanted it to be his,
Or a part of her had.
But if anything it just hurt him more.
Monkey crawled up onto his bed and nuzzled up next to him. He pulled the dogs head towards him and buried his face in the top of the dogs head.
"I lost her," he breathed, another tear slipping down his cheek.
Look what you've done to me, Blair,he thought to himself as he cried quietly on his bed, Chuck Bass doesn't cry.
"I loved her with everything I ever had and I lost her," he whispered, cuddling his dog to him.
"It's really over." He paused as another glistening tear slid down his cheek, "You really screwed me up Blair," he said, glancing up to the heavens, then he chuckled sadly, "they say it's a broken heart, but, I hurt in my whole body."
