Looking sullenly down at his batteries, Matt clenched them and suddenly flung his head toward the ceiling. "WHY, MELLO??!!! WHY??!!!!" Mello shuffled over and lifted the eggs off of Matt's head. "It's alright to cry," Mello whispered into Matt's ear. Then, as if a miracle had happened, Light Yagami bounced happily into the sad room wearing his signature mudkip hat."So….I herd u liek mudkipz…"Light said as he slid down the couch and onto Mello's lap. Mello looked down in shock as the fiendish man laid on his lap, smiling up at him. "I DUN LIKE MUDKIPZ!!!" Mello yelled, and promptly shot Light in the gut multiple times. Matt shrieked an ear-splitting, "NUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!" and ran off the couch, tripping over the weasels that Mello kept…as he was a stockholder in Weasels United. But once Matt was laying on the ground, thinking that the torture was finally over, a naff British crooner burst into the door singing "Never Gonna Give You Up." The weasels whimpered, and squeaked something that sounded vaguely like "Oh fuck rickrolled again." Rick stood triumphantly, and then smilled. "Aren't you supposed to smile when you stand triumphantly, Sir Astley?" Matt inquired. "No, it's proper to smill, it's more dynamic." the god of the internet answered. "Oh, then I guess I mustn't argue with that." Matt's voice trailed off, and was suddenly interrupted by a much louder voice saying, "I've come here to teach a valuable lesson that must never be forgotten…..Ever." Rick explained while pacing about. "I hope you, Matt, will understand that this had to be done." And then without a moment's hesitation, Sir Astley pulled out a machine gun and fired mercilessly at Mello. "Always lurv mudkipz…..Always." Rick slipped his machine gun away then raced out of the cave and onto his stapler. And from his stapler he could see Dark Link walking on a piece of broccoli. Using his magical naff-powers, he could hear Dark Link saying the following, "I HATE CHRISTMAS MUSIC IT REMINDS ME OF ANXIETY DISORDER AND FEAR OF POLIO." Rick ignored that, because Dark Link said it routinely at 2:00 AM each day. No surprise there, ha. As the seafloor spreads apart, magma moves upward and flows from the cracks. In a metaphorical sense, that statement means, "So then 4chan blew up and all furries died."
FIN
