AN: I wanted to try writing a fic where maybe they weren't unharmed and hadn't been moved to a safer place. DONT KILL ME!


"You know, the funny thing is, that horse there has heard that noise a thousand times, but he still spooks sometimes when he hears it. Horses, they have this weird way of thinking. They react now, think later. And at that moment, when he hears that noise, all he can do is think that he's going to die right at that moment, and flee. Horses aren't fighters, they're runners. Us humans feel that too, sometimes. When somebody hides, then shouts at you, you jump, no matter how many times they do it. You can only fight instinct to a certain point."

And now, over fifteen years later, that's all Kate can think about. Because no matter how many times her life or someone she cares about is in danger, she can't help but jump, and then try to decide whether to fight or run.

However, she recovers immediately, as the soot and ash starts floating down from the sky. It looks like a blizzard; it's almost quiet and serene. But in reality, it's not. Because Castle's in there. He'd be courageously leading the hostages, doing what he had to, trying his hardest to keep everyone safe. They already knew that Castle had lost one, maybe two, and now, with the explosion, Castle himself might be gone. The idea slams down on her, and her eyes widen as she realizes the possibilities, the ones she doesn't want to deal with.

Now, cops, firemen, and paramedics alike are shoving past her, running into the building. She glances back towards Alexis, who has a look of horror plastered on her face. The distraught teen is trying to duck under the police barricades, but is being pushed back into the crowd by a heavy officer. Kate knows what it's like to lose a parent, she knows how it messes you up, and she knows she can't let that happen to Alexis. She has a promise to Castle to keep.

Kate turns, and ducks under the police tape. Thanks to her navy FDNY shirt, she isn't stopped.

She jumps over the shattered front windows of the bank. She doesn't know where the robbers are, but based on the knowledge she's managed to gather over her time as a cop, they're either dead or long gone.

Inside, the bank is a mess. Dust and plaster makes her eyes burn. She's inhaling it, and now is heaving dry, rough coughs as her body struggles to remove the choking particles from her lungs. Using one hand, she clutches her white undershirt to her nose, using it to filter the air. It helps, but her throat and lungs still have millions of needles stabbing into them. She pulls her flash light out of her pocket with her right hand, and starts carefully walking through the destroyed bank. There's debris everywhere, and blood too. Any of it could be Castle's blood. Castle could be buried anywhere. What was she thinking, running into the building when she had no idea where he was? She considers joining the paramedics struggling to carry an injured man out of the destroyed building. It's disgusting, really, that she's willing to wander through the ruins of a building, trying to find a man she doesn't even know is alive. There are plenty of emergency workers that needs help caring for the wounded, but all she can think about is the man she lo-, she cares about, her partner. Richard Castle, father, son, friend, partner. She runs through the bank yelling his name. "Castle! Can you hear me?" No response. Its that fact alone that chills her to the bone. Suddenly she catches a glimpse of something lying on the floor.

She picks it up and examines, letting the light catch it. " Is it? It can't be. Martha's necklace?" She ploughs forward, driving force fresh inside her. She sees a large pile of debris in one corner of the bank and goes over to it. Looking down, she can see something sticking out from the pile. She bends down and notices something that sends shivers up her spine. A human hand.

She rolls up the sleeve and notices something very familiar. Castles watch! Panic gathers in her stomach, inviting nausea and immense dread. The person was Castle. Immediately she starts digging through the pile of concrete and broken glass.

"I need some help here!" She yells frantically, not ceasing her efforts. As if on cue medical officers come and help her dig through the pile. At this point, her hand was shredded And bloody from all the glass but she barely felt the pain. All she felt was an intense need to find castle.

Finally, the rescue workers reach him. He was lying utterly unmoving on the ground, blood covering his body. His face was pale and there was blood on his forehead. The first thing that she does is feel for a pulse. Tears start streaming down her face as she hits his body repeatedly. "Why Castle? Why did you leave me so early? I never got to tell you I love you?" She said as her voice trailed off into a whisper. With her body wracked in sobs, it was all she could do not to just fall apart. She laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes.

That was how her colleagues found her about ten minutes later. Fast asleep with dry tear tracks on her face over the dead body of Richard Castle. Ryan and Esposito had silent tears running down their cheeks. A tribute to the man they considered their partner and best friend. They wept.