I was thinking that it would be interesting to see what happened if Snow was in love with Coin…and although it makes ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE, it would be very amusing. So here is my parody of Mockingjay and the Hunger Games books in general, based on something that makes no sense. Hope it makes even less sense after you read it! XD by the way, I'm making it sappy/fluffy on purpose, to add to the humor and parody of the story. It's a sonnet composed by Snow in Coin's honor. You can imagine how that goes. It doesn't follow the 14-line sonnet guideline, because I write too much
Everybody knew that Snow had let District 13 thrive beneath the earth because he was intimidated by their threats of nuclear warfare. Apparently, this was the utter truth. They were wrong. They knew the un-truth.
If it wasn't for Alma Coin, Coriolanus Snow would have destroyed District 13 a long, long time ago. She was ruler of the unlucky-numbered district…and still, he loved her so. He longed to sing her one of his many sonnets he composed in her honor, which he hid from public knowledge and disguised as Capitol concepts and plans. Apparently, all of them were burned by those who were rebellious, thinking that the love poems were plans to destroy their own lives. But they still knew the un-truth.
One of these many sonnets, 87 in fact, was not cremated, ashen like the skin of the citizens of the district formerly known as 3. In fact, it was found in two pieces inside each of Snow's grey, dull socks, yes, the ones he wore with his shined Capitol shoes. Half and half makes a whole, so they were put together carefully and sealed with the strongest cheap glue the Rebels could find, as they did not care to waste money for the humiliation of the almost-most hated ruler in Panem, after Coin, whom they despised more. Most of them, anyway.
After Snow and Coin's deaths, they transcribed the remnants of this remaining sonnet, the one composed by Coriolanus Snow in the honor of Alma Coin, whom he loved so. They have finally released this humiliating piece of evidence to the world, and to history as well! So that is what you have ahead of you: the discriminating, rather embarrassing evidence of Snow's extreme, insatiable hunger for Coin's love, that which was never quelled—not even by the Quells, which he longed for Coin to witness; such bountiful "entertainment", he quoted, and not one of Alma's shiny, cruel (of course, he didn't say that) grey eyes to see it.
Such pains were fought by Snow, never having been able to fully express his total devotion to Alma Coin. But here you have it! His full confession of love to the "most admirable person in existence".
**written to be sung to the tune of a most rustic guitar**
My benevolent Alma Coin,
I long to be with you
You have never once seen me clearly, yet I have seen just what you are capable of.
You were the one to inspire me of the beard-cut I gave myself to Crane (who isn't worthy of your genius)
You never did see one of the brilliant Quells, not one of your shiny grey eyes
And that is why my thirst for your love has not yet and never will quell
You were the one who gave me sorrow so sweet, even the sickliest roses didn't cover it
You were the one to fake rebellion so intelligently that all of them fell for it
Yet I could see right through to your beautiful frown
You were the one to save my light, and instead replace it with the most beautiful shadow
Oh, the most beautiful shadow…
Even the sunlight couldn't escape
Nobody but you, Alma, my love, the one I have been waiting for
The most admirable person in existence—it's a fact of life
Facts don't have life, and life doesn't have facts, but you have both
Both at the same time, facts and life, and that is why I love you so
If only the dreaded potato-girl hadn't shot that shaft of wood
And killed your beautiful shadow
So I laugh, and she kills mine too.
As you can see, this was written by Snow nearly seconds before his own death. Because nobody was paying attention to what he was doing at the moment, and instead listening—and watching—Coin, we can be free to imagine what happened. So this is my theory. XD
