Gibbs huffed a sigh as he heard his front door open and shut upstairs. Sometimes he wondered if he should start using the lock. He continued to concentrate on the rough wood in front of him as he waited to see who the latest visitor was.
"Hey, Boss."
It was DiNozzo. Gibbs suppressed a smile as he remembered his agent face-planting the floor when he'd picked up his weighted down back pack. He grunted in what only an optimist could take as a welcome.
"What you making, Boss?"
"Wood thing."
"Wow, Boss. Not everything has to be a secret you know."
"What?" asked Gibbs as he looked up at his senior field agent in irritation, "what's that supposed to mean?"
"Just saying, Boss. It's OK sometimes to share. You know, well, Tony, I'm making a new dresser, thank you for asking".
"This look like a dresser to you, DiNozzo?" Gibbs gestured towards the huge beams of wood.
"No, Boss. What I meant was that you don't have to guard everything. Sharing's OK. Or are you worried I'll go into work tomorrow and say, hey, everyone, you'll never guess what Gibbs is building in his basement?"
"DiNozzo …" sighed Gibbs.
"Boss, it was a simple question, you know, the sort of conversation friends might have."
Gibbs looked at him in bafflement.
"Yeah, I know, forget that."
Gibbs decided this was too complicated for him so decided to try and move the conversation on.
"What you doing here, DiNozzo?"
Tony grabbed a saw horse and dragged it opposite to Gibbs and sat down.
"You know you don't call me Tony anymore," he said in a contemplative tone.
"You drunk?" asked Gibbs.
"No."
"You come here to complain about what I call you?" demanded Gibbs.
"Didn't say it was a complaint," said Tony reasonably, "just an observation. Thought you wanted us to be observant."
Gibbs shook his head and carried on picking at the lumber with a chisel.
"You call McGee, Tim," continued Tony in the same level tone of voice.
"You counting how many times I call McGee by his first name? Jeez, DiNozzo!"
"Not exactly counting," said Tony, "I mean, I don't go home and write it all down in a book or anything. But you have to admit, Boss, that you call the Probie Tim more often than you call me Tony."
"What's this about, DiNozzo?"
"And DiNozzo. You always say it with this sort of impatient, angry sort of voice."
"And this surprises you?" said Gibbs sarcastically.
"Kind of. After all, you're the one who insists that your team is the best. So it's kinda odd that you keep someone on the team who seems to fall short all the time. Just saying, you know, it's sort of out of character."
"Tony," said Gibbs trying for a gentler tone, "what's going on? You know I trust you, I wouldn't keep you on the team if I didn't."
Tony hit his forehead dramatically, "of course," he said, "I forget. I got the annual I trust you speech … well, sentence, last week. Not in front of anyone, of course, but still, it should be enough to keep me going for the rest of the year."
"What you want me to say?" asked Gibbs, "this is how I am, you know that."
"Yeah," said Tony, "remind me, Boss, which rule is it that says 'change is bad'?"
Tony didn't seem to expect an answer and lapsed into silence as he gazed at the shelves on the wall behind Gibbs. Gibbs picked up the chisel again and began to chip away at the bark.
"Saw Agent Borin this evening," said Tony after a few minutes.
"Thought she had a case," said Gibbs.
"False alarm," said Tony, "she said she'd been down here. Bearding the lion in his lair."
"Is that what she said?" asked Gibbs with a ghost of a smile.
"She said you offered her a job on the team."
"Not exactly," hedged Gibbs.
"She got it wrong?"
"Not exactly," said Gibbs again.
Tony put his head in his hands for a moment and Gibbs decided to take pity on him.
"I put out some feelers," said Gibbs, "see if she wanted a change."
"You know," said Tony conversationally, "Great Uncle Clive told me once that he was offered a gong in the New Year's Honours in the UK. He got a letter telling him that it was a possibility."
"So?" said Gibbs, not understanding why Tony was suddenly talking about his British relations.
"So, it's not considered polite to say 'no' to the Queen. So they write to you saying the monarch is thinking about giving you a knighthood or something and you have to say that you'll accept or refuse it if it's offered. Then, if you say 'yes', you get a letter from the Queen formally offering it to you."
"That's … nice," said Gibbs half-heartedly, "what did your uncle do?"
"Said 'yes'," said Tony, "point is, I didn't realise you were like the Queen of England. You didn't want Borin to turn you down so you sounded her out first."
Gibbs shook his head again and banished thoughts of being like the Queen.
"Although," said Tony thoughtfully, "in practice, England's a democracy and the Queen is just there for constitutional reasons whereas you're a despot. And not always a benevolent one either."
Gibbs almost smiled, "thought you liked Borin?" he said mildly.
"I do," confirmed Tony, "she's great."
"Abby and Ducky seemed to like the idea," said Gibbs.
"You discussed it with them?" asked Tony.
"No."
"Sorry," said Tony, "poor choice of word – discussed".
"SecNav pointed out that we were a man down," said Gibbs.
"And SecNav's concerns are always top of your agenda," agreed Tony. "So, what did she say?"
"SecNav?"
"Borin."
"She didn't tell you?"
"Well, as she didn't say, see you in the squad room on Monday, I'm guessing she turned you down."
"For the moment," agreed Gibbs, "not the right time."
"And you thought adding Borin to the team was a good idea?" asked Tony.
"You don't?"
"Gibbs, I get that she was like kryptonite today."
"What does that mean?" demanded Gibbs.
"Oh, come on, Gibbs. Even you must get that movie reference. Kryptonite – Superman's only weakness."
"Not following you here, DiNozzo."
"Borin has a mini meltdown over some sort of flashback over the explosion on the oil rig and the Gibbs 'protection chip' is activated and you want her on the team."
"So? You said she was great."
"And what do you think she'd do on the team?" asked Tony.
"Well, duh … I thought she might be a Special Agent," said Gibbs, "you know, do some investigative work."
"Ha ha!" said Tony, "Not what I meant. What would she come in as?"
"I just said," said Gibbs with a touch of impatience, "Special Agent."
"Gibbs, Borin is a supervisor. What makes you think she'd want to come and report to you? Or were you going to have two leaders?"
"Can only have one leader, DiNozzo," said Gibbs.
"So how would it work out, Gibbs?"
"I'd figure it out," replied Gibbs.
"Oh, I see," said Tony, "so I wouldn't come in one morning and find I'd been demoted? That's not your style anymore? So what's the plan, we'd all get together in a real conference room and discuss how the team dynamics would work with an alpha female, used to being in charge, being added to the mix?" Tony laughed as he saw the discomfort in Gibbs' face.
"You know I don't go in for all that campfire crap," said Gibbs, "I'd work it out. You can trust me."
If he'd been closer, Gibbs thought he might have sealed the deal with a manly clasp of DiNozzo's shoulder so he was taken by surprise when Tony's reaction to his promise was to dissolve in a helpless fit of giggles.
"Oh, God," said Tony when he was able to catch his breath again, "you actually mean it! You think that I'll believe in your people management skills – yeah, because that's got such a stellar record. It's like when you told us about rule #51, sometimes you're wrong and you had this sanctimonious look on your face as if you'd had this message from heaven and learned what everyone else had learned in kindergarten. Oh, God," said Tony again, "I don't know whether I should be laughing or crying. All that head trauma has had its effect."
"You finished?" asked Gibbs coldly.
Tony straightened up, "Yeah, Boss," he said more calmly, "but just so you know. Adding Borin to the mix is not a good idea. Yes, I like her, she's a good agent but you can't just slot her into the team. Apart from me, it pushes Tim down a level too."
Gibbs waved a dismissive hand.
"Gibbs," said Tony firmly, "you can't add Borin to the team just as a Special Agent. She's used to giving the orders. Believe me, it takes a while to get used to going down a level. It took me long enough and I was only in charge four months."
"That what this is about?" sneered Gibbs, "you afraid you're going to lose your position?"
"Sure," said Tony readily, "and why's that a bad thing? I like my job. Sometimes I even think I'm good at it. Why should I be happy to think I'd be demoted?"
"I wouldn't demote you," said Gibbs.
"Gibbs, it's hard enough for anyone to believe that I'm your senior field agent now. What do you think it would be like if you add a female you to the team?"
"Borin isn't a female me."
"Gibbs, listen to me. You add Borin to the team and I'm gone".
"You threatening me, DiNozzo?" said Gibbs menacingly.
"No, Boss. I'm just stating a fact. I won't stay on the team if you put someone in who's senior to me."
"It's my team," said Gibbs, "my …"
"Yeah, I know," said Tony interrupting him, "my team, my rules. And not forgetting rule #52."
"What's rule #52?" asked Gibbs.
"Keep the team in their place."
"DiNozzo, you're blowing this out of proportion. Anyway, Borin doesn't want to join the team."
"Yet, and what do you do when she decides it is the right time?"
"We'll work on it. Don't borrow trouble, DiNozzo."
"OK," said Tony, "but I meant what I said."
"Tony," said Gibbs gently, "what would you do if you left? Another force? FBI? Private security? It's not like you're McGee with all those techno skills that head-hunters salivate over."
"Thanks, Boss," said Tony, "good to know that you think I'm past my sell by date."
"That's not what I meant," said Gibbs, "you know you're my type of agent. I just meant that what you've got with NCIS is better than what's waiting for you outside."
"Dinosaurs need to stick together, eh? Hey, DiNozzo the Dinosaur sort of has a ring to it, doesn't it?"
"Tony," sighed Gibbs.
"Did you notice anything when you added that dumbbell to my backpack?" asked Tony.
"What?"
"Oh, come on, Gibbs, d'you think I didn't know it was you? Besides, your golden girl confirmed that it was an old marine trick. What did you think? It would lighten the mood to have me sprawled on the floor in front of everyone?"
"Didn't know there'd be an audience," said Gibbs tacitly admitting what he'd done.
"True," said Tony thoughtfully, "it is unusual for me to be the first to leave. Guess that must be because I'm so incompetent that I'm always behind. Can't be because I'm dedicated to the job. Perhaps you should ask Agent Borin to investigate."
"Let it go," said Gibbs wearily.
"So," said Tony going back to an earlier point, "what did you see when you loaded my backpack?"
"Nothing."
"Special Agent Gibbs! Perhaps we should get Agent Borin to replace you. Or send you back to FLETC to hone your observational skills."
"What you getting at?"
"The law books in my bag. The law books that have been on my desk for the last few weeks."
"What about them?" asked Gibbs.
"I'm taking some law classes," said Tony, "started in the summer when we turned in our badges in loyal support of our wonderful supervisor."
"You going to be a lawyer?" said Gibbs incredulously.
"Wow," said Tony in a wondering voice, "I'd been trying to guess how I'd feel when you said those words to me. You know lawyer in that contemptuous way."
"And?" asked Gibbs.
"Thank you for asking. I feel fine. Was a time when something inside me would have shrivelled up and died if you spoke to me like that. But now, not so much."
"What you mean, you're going to be a lawyer?"
"Nope, still no side-effect," mused Tony, "I'm just taking some classes. Might do some paralegal work or might go the whole way. DiNozzo the Dinosaur looking to change, get some options on the table."
"But law?" said Gibbs.
"Yeah, you know, that thing that federal agents are sworn to uphold. Well, most of us anyway."
"Tony …"
"Hey, don't worry, Gibbs. It's not the right time at the moment so you'll just have to wait and see. Like you thought it would be OK for me to wait to see if Agent Borin wanted to come and take over my job. Good thing you've got a replacement ready for me, isn't it? What was it you said? Don't borrow trouble."
"This isn't over, DiNozzo," said Gibbs, "We'll talk about this when you're calmer."
"Calmer?" said Tony in a puzzled voice, "I've never been calmer. I think it's you who might need to ask Ducky for a blood pressure check." He stood up, "oh, and thanks, Gibbs."
"What for?" asked Gibbs.
"For playing that prank on me."
"What?"
"Twisted my shoulder and banged my knee as I went down. Had to go to the Emergency Room to get it sorted."
"Why are you saying thank you?"
"Well, partly I guess because you always expect us to be grateful for whatever you throw at us."
"What's the other part?"
"They gave me some painkillers. Good ones, not enough to make me loopy but just enough to lower my inhibitions so I could talk to you man to man. So thank you, Boss."
"DiNozzo …"
"Oh, and Boss, the doc put me on sick leave for two days so I won't be in tomorrow. Shall I tell Vance how I got my work place injury or will you? G'Night."
And he was gone.
AN: I really like Agent Borin … but I can't see that adding her to the team would have worked. As always, I don't own the characters and have put them back in their boxes almost as good as new.
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