Salad and Cream
Salad Fingers had just finished shagging all the cutlery in the room of the dustbin he lived in. He thought 'what shall I fuck now', but then he saw his night in shining armour - A ladel. Salad Fingers slowly placed the ladel by his crotch, and spewed his 'Salad Cream' all over the label, and fed it to his pet snail, Gerald Croft, who had by then just hit his snail-puberty. Salad Fingers spewed another round of Salad Cream into the ladel, this time throwing it back at himself and screamed 'god, YES!'. However, Mr Scissors, a shiny, sharp, and rusty pair of scissors and previous lover of salad fingers, got jealous. He went up to Salad Fingers, and said 'Hey wanna live life without a dick you cheating bastard!' and Salad said 'what?' and before picking up what he just said, Mr Scissors chopped his balls off and fed it to the snail, who by that time was creating loads of slime, and Mr Fingers fainted, and Mr Scissors and Ladel then ate him.
The End.
