new story. whoo. :P
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Smidge of Blood
Written by: evermore.x3
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Sad hazel eyes stared back at me as I stood in front of my mirror. I was flashing my most convincing smiles at my reflection, trying to perfect it. All of my attempts looked fake to me, too happy, a kind of creepy happy, the kind of smile that doesn't reach my eyes but bears my teeth. I look crazy, I sigh defeated, tired of pretending.
I inspect my body next, making sure that everything that should be hidden is covered up. I pinch my sides and frown, disgusted by how fat I was. I looked disgusting. My gaze wandered away from my body, I couldn't stand looking at my hideous body.
I walk to my closet to look for clothes; I spot the ones that Alex's mom gave to me on Christmas. They were cute and absolutely perfect. I don't plan to wear them ever though. They wouldn't look good on me, no normal clothes would ever be right for me. The perfect clothes would be better for someone like Alex. She had the body for them and the pretty face to go with them. She would rock those clothes like a model. I would ruin them; nobody would want to see me in them anyway. Everybody would point and laugh at me more than they already did.
I glared at the clothes, willing them to disappear. I didn't need them there to mock me. To remind me every day that I would ever be good enough for them, that I would never be good enough for anything. That I was nothing compared to my beautiful friend. I envied her sometimes, although I would never tell her. She was known by everyone and most guys thought she was gorgeous. I think she knew what boys thought of her but she didn't bother with them and didn't let it get to her head and I admired her for that. I think she already likes somebody, I don't know who but I can tell.
I wish I had guys' attention, but I don't they usually avoid me like I'm the carrier of H1N1, either that or they make fun of me to no end because of my weird habits and clothes. I wish I had Justin's attention but he doesn't even seem to know me for me, just as Alex's friend like most people do. He'll never understand how much I like him. He doesn't seem to notice my obvious infatuation towards him; it seems as if his heart has already been taken by somebody. I frown at the realization; he's already in love with somebody that's not me.
I don't think it's possible for anybody to love an ugly, broken girl like me. My eyes tear up at the thought of being alone forever; I quickly blink them back and try to swallow the lump in my throat that won't ever go away. I look back to the mirror to see the face of a miserable girl trying hard not to cry. I look away again, that girl is pathetic. That girl was me.
A painful scream brought me out of my thoughts; I peeked out my dirty brown door into the small living room with mismatching sofas to see my mother cowering in fear on the ground, her hands covering her face. My father-if you could call him that- stood over her, his face a mask of pure fury. I shut my eyes and close the door softly, fearing it will be me on the floor if I get caught watching.
I go back to my small packed closet to pick out my clothes for the day. After a while of contemplation, I finally decided on a white T-shirt with a big bright smiley face on the front and a rainbow colored skirt that goes past my knees. Appropriate clothes for me, ugly and unfashionable, I top it off with handmade tennis shoes with tiny unicorn drawings on the side.
Once I'm done dressing myself and brushing my long reddish brown hair, I go back to the dreadful mirror to practice my smile again. The final result is a big grin that hurts my cheeks and screams happiness although my eyes whisper pain. I ignore that fact and walk out of my apartment careful to ignore my parents watching eyes, I'm ready for another day of pretending.
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hey, my first WOWP story, be kind. oneshot? or more? tell me. R&R.
btw, i dont own anything.
