Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha. Rumiko Takahashi does.
Summary: She hid from her past. He refused to let go of his. Two people who had lost everything would find everything in each other in the midst of a battle 500 years in the making. AU I/K, M/S
WARNING: This fanfic is rated X and you know what this means.
Opening text:
On the summer of 1996, the members of the Sanggre, Keepers of Light and descendants of Midoriko, held their annual council call in their clan house, which was secluded and located in the mountain ranges of Northern Japan. For more than half a millennium, this mythical clan, most thought to be extinct also guarded the legendary Shikon No Tama and had been fighting a war against evil victoriously… until tonight.
PROLOGUE: STORIES, FORETELLING AND DREAMS
"Kagome," Akira called her daughter lovingly as he looked at the red horizon. The air was uncomfortably humid. The birds flew in circles as they screeched to the heavens.
"It'll rain soon," he whispered to himself.
Azure pools watched a blood red sky cracked open as the first drops of summer rain fell, wetting her young face. She giggled mischievously, raising her dainty hands up in the air as if trying to catch all of them. She had not had the chance to play under the rain all year and she refused to just throw the moment away. After all, she was still 10.
"10 more minutes, Papa!" a young Kagome stalled waving her hand, and then sprinted away.
Akira smiled and shook his head in response. He knew how much she had loved the rain. And it seemed that during most of the important moments in her life, it rained. It rained the moment she cried to the heavens when she was born. It was raining when she first took her first step, as it was when she had spoken her first word. Now, the rain poured. What could possibly happen today that would signify one turning point in Kagome's life?
"Oomph!" he bellowed, as he stumbled backward.
"Gotcha!" Kagome shouted with the one ginormous grin as she hugged her father's waist.
Akira chuckled and raised an eyebrow upon seeing mud covered her all over.
"I did say 10 minutes, didn't I?" she bubbly said as she caught her breath.
"Yes, you did," Akira said as he playfully pinched her nose. "Now go and get cleaned up."
"Okay," Kagome said and instantly sauntered away, but not before giving him a kiss. Chuckling, Akira watched his daughter sprinted inside the house leaving a wet and muddy trail behind her.
"She really is your daughter. She's as spirited as you," he heard his wife, Kaori say and felt her loving arms hugging him from behind.
"You were also as zestful as her when you were her age," Akira replied, chuckling still.
"Sometimes I even think she's more of a boy than a girl," Kaori added as she held his hands and led him to sit down. She stared at the pouring rain outside. She could feel that something would happen today, and so she dreaded every drop of it.
"Akira?" she asked.
"Hmmm?"
"Is the prophecy really true? I mean about our Kagome… about her being the key to the Shikon no Tama and everything else that goes with it," she asked worriedly.
"Yes," he simply answered.
"But how can that be? She's just a girl, Akira. She's my little girl. She's supposed to live happily, get a good career, marry and have her own children someday. She's not Midoriko's heiress. She's not the warrior who will fight against Naraku's resurrection. I refuse to accept that fact. I mean… we live in a modern world. It's 1996 for crying out loud, not the warring era of Sengoku Jidai," she ranted as tears ran down her face.
"Kaori…."
"Please Akira… please tell me you will not let Kagome go when the time comes. You know the dangers she will face. You know what holds for her if she fights. Please… I am asking you as your love and wife and the mother of your precious Kagome. Please, I beg of you," Kaori sobbed.
"Kaori… you have known Kagome's duty from the moment she is born. She bears Midoriko's light and mark. She has no choice but to embrace her destiny," Akira explained calmly at his wife as she sobbed. "Aren't you proud your daughter will save us all?" he added.
"I fear for her, Akira. I fear for her," she continued to sob as he hugged her tightly, comforting her.
"Papa? Why is Mama crying?" a now clean Kagome asked once she had entered the room.
"No, Little One, your Mama just got something in her eye," Akira explained. Kagome looked at him quizzically but just shrugged off her inquiry.
"Can you tell me the story again, Papa?" she asked her father as she sat down on his lap and hugged his waist. Ever since she was old enough to hear, he had told her stories of their clan; tales that only existed in their line; tales that she would need for her to fulfill her duty.
"Alright," Akira agreed to her request as he chuckled heartily. "But where do you want to begin, Kagome?"
"The beginning," she answered enthusiastically.
"Okay, let's see. Long ago, in a time when many youkai and war ravaged the land, there was a young warrior priestess named Midoriko who once fought a great battle against thousands of demons. It seemed that the battle was endless. However, on the eve of the autumn equinox, as a last resort to defeat the powerful demon that had clutched her with its massive jaws, Midoriko poured all her spiritual power as she seized the demon's spirit and bound it to hers. In exchange, she gave her life away to be the shell of the war between good and evil. This battle created the Shikon no Tama, the enchanted jewel which was believed to grant any wish one desired," Akira started as Kagome listened attentively.
"Word about the power of the jewel reached greedy and power-hungry demons as well as humans, and they decided to seek out the jewel. In an attempt to protect the jewel, the remaining warriors of light, who feared that the jewel would be used for personal gains, entrusted it to the Sanggre. That's us," he added, tapping the young Kagome's nose. "…Because they believed we could keep the jewel hidden and protected for the rest of time."
"We are strong, aren't we Papa?" the ten year old Kagome asked proudly, causing her mother to chuckle softly.
"Of course, we are. We have protected the jewel up to now, haven't we?" Akira affirmed lovingly while Kagome nodded.
"The jewel was guarded by lines of priests and priestesses that followed, devoted to only protecting the jewel. But that oath was broken 550 years ago when the jewel was under the guardianship of the young priestess Seira, daughter of Tetsuo 666th leader of Sanggre, as she was tricked into stealing the jewel from its keep. The person behind the trickery was her human lover named Onigumo. He was an evil man who wanted to become a demon. The priestess, true to her heart, made the wish for Onigumo to be a demon. But at the same time, her deceitful lover wished another instead - for all the power and evil in the world to be his. Two conflicting wishes… one made out of love, and the other by selfish greed perturbed balance between good and evil within the jewel - tainting it. Darkness overwhelmed light as Onigumo's greed surpassed that of any love the priestess had for him, and caused the balance to snap, releasing the soul of the demon from inside the jewel, purifying the Shikon no Tama in the process. In exchange, it sucked the young priestess's soul leaving her lying lifeless on the ground, as the jewel returned to its keep," he continued but was interrupted with the booming bell of the shrine.
Kaori stood up abruptly and exchanged alarmed looks with Akira before sauntering outside the room quietly. She hastily walked towards the main shrine. Kagome remained oblivious as Akira continued with his storytelling.
"Onigumo, crippled by the immense power the jewel had emitted, lay beside Shiera as he desperately gasped the final moments of his life. As a last resort of a dying man, he made a pact with the demon's soul to restore his life and give him its power, and in exchange, he would be the demon's living shell. He had also promised to destroy Midoriko's line and the Shikon no Tama, since they were the only threats powerful enough to defeat him. He was granted the power and an almost eternal life that he had so much craved. Thus, the dark hanyou known as Naraku was born."
"For 50 years, Naraku pillaged the land and made an empire on his own to counter the power of the Sanggre warriors. However, he did not succeed as the Sanggre found themselves strong allies from different races. Finally, Naraku was defeated and his body and soul were banished and sent to hell together with his minions. But before he was completely engulfed by the darkness, he swore to come back again, to take revenge against the Sanggre, to finally destroy the Shikon no Tama and build his empire once again with blood and flames. The remaining Sanggre warriors were fearful of what Naraku's second coming would bring about since not one of them was powerful and pure enough to draw out and control the power of the Shikon no Tama. So they hid it… away from the world until the royal line would produce someone of Midoriko's equal, someone who could call upon the jewel's true power and finally destroy Naraku."
Akira was about to continue when Kagome's head rolled to the side revealing her serene sleeping face. Akira watched the sleeping bundle in his arms with warm deep blue eyes. His daughter, who had his deep ocean pools but everything else she got from her beautiful mother, only whimpered as he brought her down on her futon. She was still ten and hardly knew the struggles of life and the dangers it brought especially to their clan. But he believed Kagome to be strong. She would be; she should be. Her race dictated it from her. Her destiny required it of her. Though Kagome had always missed the part of their history about her prophesized being Midoriko's equal, she somehow knew that she was born to be great as what her father had always told her.
"You are meant to do great things, my Little One. You are meant to save us all. And you will - in time. Goodnight, My Kagome," Akira whispered lovingly against Kagome's forehead before kissing it.
He stood up, closed the shoji door on her room, and briskly, yet, quietly walked towards the main shrine. The mark on his hand lit bright blue as he neared the shrine, a sign of imminent danger. He was Akira 1567th, the current leader of Sanggre, the race that of ancient warrior priests and priestesses and direct descendants of Midoriko. Protector and warriors of light, the Sanggre held the secret of the Shikon no Tama, the jewel of the four souls.
However, to those who were oblivious to Akira's history and true identity, he was Dr. Akira Sagara, an attending in the neurology unit of Tokyo General Hospital. Sanggre had been an ancient line that valued tradition; yet, they had also embraced the ideology of change brought by the passing of time. With this, the ancient clan had somehow survived and the public oblivious to their existence.
He opened the shoji door of the Main Shrine and a frantic council blurted out their concerns alarmingly.
"AKIRA! We have trouble," Ryoshi shouted gasping for air as his trembling hands held a burnt parchment, but he was interrupted by Muso, Akira's right hand.
"AKIRA! The demons… They have surrounded us. I do not know how, but they have found us. They have broken the barriers and only the last one outside the gates is left standing," Muso shouted alarmingly.
"How can that be? I've thought the location of this place is unknown except for the Sanggre," someone said in the midst of the confusion.
"I know we've been followed by demons since we've arrived here, but to actually find us here when we've put up several barriers around the vicinity is simply impossible," Ryoshi said as he turned towards a grim Akira.
"How's the last barrier doing?" Akira asked.
"It is quickly weakening, Akira," Muso replied.
"That can't be possible," Akira exclaimed disbelievingly. "How come 7 barriers have been destroyed in such a short time Muso?"
"There's a dark miko named Tsubaki with them. She's leading the demon swarm and has infiltrated the barriers in record time," Muso explained. "It's only a matter of minutes before they breach our last defense and reach us here. What shall we do, Akira?"
Akira looked at the council as he searched his thoughts for a decision. His gaze was now fixed on Kaori who was standing in the corner of the room. However, Ryoshi interrupted his musing.
"Akira, you need to read this," Ryoshi said as he gave the burnt parchment he had held a while ago.
"Alas – I say to you, the Sakuras will bleed in flames and blood. The warrior's line will be broken. Lives will be spent. And evil will make himself known once more," Akira read. "What does this mean, Ryoshi?"
"This is what we have recovered from Katsu's house after he has burned it down and fled with his daughter Kikyo 2 weeks ago. Akira, this passage is from Katsushiro 1067th's prophecies of death, which has long been missing from the archives. It seems that Katsu has interpreted the writings and decided to flee and save himself from the dangers ahead," Ryoshi explained breathlessly.
He leaned closer to Akira, and with a chillingly low voice, he spoke, "Akira, this passage talks about the total annihilation of the Sanggre."
"The warrior's line will be broken…" Akira whispered.
"The demons are preparing the path for Naraku's return by getting rid of us first," Ryoshi rasped.
"A massacre…" Akira uttered dreadfully.
They needed to do something.
"Kaori," Akira called.
"Yes, Akira," she replied.
"Take Kagome to a safe place," he told his beloved softly.
She was about to protest but he did not give her the chance.
"I know you will protest and will choose to fight alongside me, but our little Kagome needs you more than I do," he whispered as he caressed her cheeks.
She nodded silently, a lone tear falling down her cheek, which was easily caught by Akira's loving hand.
"But Akira, we are surrounded and Kaori's spiritual power is not enough to fight the demon swarm. We need to hold our ground and keep the barrier intact. That's our only chance," Muso said firmly.
It was true. Kaori's spiritual power would not be enough to protect Kagome. In fact, Kagome even had more spiritual power than she did. But experience and training made all the difference, and Akira knew that.
"No," Akira said. "We will not have any chance if we only defend ourselves. We need to fight."
"Kaori, take Kagome. Muso, please escort her," he ordered.
"Akira," Kaori hugged him tightly and sobbed.
"My heart will always be with you," he whispered capturing her lips for a passionate kiss, pouring all his love into that kiss - their last kiss. She reciprocated fiercely as her tears flowed freely.
"Go and keep our Kagome safe," he uttered once they released each other from the kiss.
She nodded and walked quickly out of the shrine.
"Muso," Akira called. "Please take care of my family."
"With my life, Akira," Muso answered and smiled at his best friend and leader before following Kaori.
"Thank you," Akira whispered.
"Akira," Ryoshi called, still waiting for his decision.
"Ryoshi, please ring the shrine bell. Let the others know the word. The rest of us will stay here and fend off the swarm. If the prophecy holds true, we will all perish tonight. But we will not go without a fight," Akira spoke firmly, his mark now a blinding blue light.
They are near. He thought fiercely.
"AKIRA! The demons have breached the barrier. They're coming," Aki shouted.
Now, the war had begun once more….
"Hurry up, Kagome. We need to hurry up," Kaori called to her daughter who was trailing behind her. Muso followed closely, guarding their rear. They were still inside the grounds when the demons finally brought down the barrier and reached the shrine.
"Mama, what's going on? Where's Papa?" Kagome asked trying to keep up with the two adults.
They now reached the clearing where the Sakura's grew in full blossom. The rain continued to pour soaking them wet. The ground was muddy making it difficult to run. Kaori, out of concern and worry for Kagome to keep up with them, dropped her guard down and turned around to face her daughter, unaware of the dozens of demons coming their direction.
"Kaori! Look out!" Muso shouted and moved quickly in front to erect a barrier as more demons came.
"Muso!" Kaori called shielding Kagome.
"You need to go!" Muso told her. "You need to keep Kagome safe. She's our only hope."
Kaori nodded firmly as she roughly carried Kagome and sprinted towards the safest place she could possibly think of, the underground shrine, where most of the spiritual energy of the place was centered. It was a sanctuary but only for one, as it could only shelter that much. Kagome clung to her mother desperately as she searched her surroundings for her father. Finally, she spotted him.
"Papa!" she yelled but received no response.
Kaori ran hurriedly, yet, rather blindly that she tripped on a rock. They sprawled to the ground painfully with Kagome landing on her back just three feet away from her mother.
"Mama," Kagome called, but froze.
A gigantic bear demon stood only 5 feet away from her mother. Its eyes were bloodshot, and it raised its claws to strike.
"Mama, watch out!" she yelled in warning.
Kaori reacted just in time and dodged the bear youkai's massive claws. But the demon was relentless and Kaori had no choice but to tell Kagome to go on her own.
"Kagome! Run and hide in the underground shrine! Remember your training, concentrate and your power will materialize before you," Kaori told Kagome while she ran for cover. "Be brave My Kagome," she whispered and threw an energy ball at the bear youkai.
Kagome ran as fast as she could. The underground shrine was at the farthest and highest point of the shrine grounds. Her Sanggre mark was a blinding silver light as she tried to outrun the five demons on her tail. She was near. She was so close.
But she stumbled.
She felt a clawed hand grasped her tiny neck. Her hands automatically moved and grasped the said hand as she attempted to free herself. She was now in midair, dangling helplessly in the hand of a horrendous youkai.
"Let go of me or I'll purify your ugly asses to hell!" she shouted. Now, where did she learn to cuss like that?
The demons laughed hysterically.
"What can a little girl like you do?" one asked showing yellowish fangs. He was about to lick Kagome's cheek as if tasting her, but he was blown away by a spirit blast. Kagome watched as one by one the demons hit the ground. She turned towards their attacker and smiled.
"Papa!"
"Kagome!" Akira yelled as he ran towards her. He embraced her little daughter and she clung to him.
"Here, Kagome. Take this," Akira said putting his enchanted beads around Kagome's neck. "This will protect you Little One. Remember, whatever happens, Mama and Papa will always be with you."
She nodded bravely and he kissed her forehead lovingly. "Now go, Kagome. Run. And don't look back," Akira told her firmly.
He watched her little form sauntered as fast as she could go, as she remained unnoticed by the demons around them.
"Live… My Kagome," he whispered.
"Hmmm… How touching Akira. You know she's still gonna die," a sinister voice said from behind him causing his blood to run cold. And he snarled turning around to spat the name of the owner's voice.
"Tsubaki!"
"Glad you still remember me, Beloved," Tsubaki smiled with seductive malice, spitting the last word with so much hate.
"How could I forget the traitor who sold her soul to the demons just to gain more power and eternal youth?" Akira snarled but she only smirked evilly.
"You never have appreciated anything that I have done just to have your love. I have sold my soul to the darkness just for you to love me more; but no, instead, you have chosen to wed a lowly Sanggre. I have been the most beautiful and most powerful of the Sanggre priestesses; yet, you have completely ignored me," she purred darkly, her voice growing louder with every word.
"You have made a fool out of me. And you think that I will just stay quiet out in exile and leave you alone? Of course not, Akira… You and your kin shall pay for what you have done to me," she roared furiously as dark aura surrounded her, taking the shape of two serpents that charged towards Akira. He readied himself, erecting a spiritual barrier but the serpents just passed him by, instead, it headed towards…
"NO! Kaori!" he yelled.
However, he had been too late as the two serpents snaked around his wife's body, constricting her tightly, forcing air out of her lungs as they simultaneously poisoned her with their lethal bites.
Tsubaki laughed maniacally as she mocked him, "Your weakness has always been that woman, Akira. Aren't you glad I've gotten rid of her?"
"You vile, loathsome witch!" Akira spat, his heart breaking as his wife gasped her last breath. He gripped his sword's hilt and readied his stance for attack.
"Tsk… Tsk… Language, Akira… It is not too leader-like of you to speak like that, is it? Don't worry; I'll kill you too. Soon you'll join your love in the depths of hell," Tsubaki said. "Oh sorry, Should I have said heaven?" she added and cackled darkly, savoring his misery.
"I'll kill you if it's the last thing I do," Akira furiously swore, his eyes beaming with conviction.
And he charged, a spiral ball spearheading his attack as he raised his sword to strike and drive through Tsubaki's flesh. But it didn't; instead, it hit the solid sphere of Tsubaki's barrier. She smirked triumphantly.
"You told me yourself Akira, I am more powerful," she hissed, grinning at him as she silently ordered her poison serpents to leave Kaori's dead body and target Kagome.
"You're a terrible, terrible father, Akira. Imagine… leaving a helpless little girl in the middle of this war?" she taunted as he tried to bring down her barrier with his sword.
Akira's eyes narrowed when he heard what she had said and turned to Kagome's direction. He dreadfully sprinted towards her; while in the background, Tsubaki expressed her fake disapproval of him leaving her again for another lowly Sanggre.
"Kagome!" Akira called.
Kagome stopped abruptly and turned towards her father's voice to come face to face with the two serpents trailing behind her. They flew around her closely, yet, not touching her skin.
"Papa!" she called fearfully, as she was rooted in her place.
"Kagome, don't move!" Akira commanded as he ran to her aid.
However, Tsubaki was faster than he was as she had reached Kagome first. True to her resolve of killing his kin, she raised her sword to strike Kagome. Kagome held her breath as she shut her eyes and waited for her imminent demise. But it didn't come. She slowly opened her eyes and gasped. Tsubaki's sword drove into her father's chest. Blood oozed from his heart out to stain his clean robes, as some trickled from his mouth.
"You are a foolish man, Akira. You've always put me last. You've always disappointed me. You've never considered me. And for that, you have to pay," Tsubaki whispered as she withdrew her sword with a strong yank.
Kagome stood rooted on the spot with wide eyes as tears flooded and overflowed, wetting her pretty, little face. At the same time, the rain poured heavily. Her lips trembled as she sobbed.
"No…" Kagome whispered and the air around her boiled.
The droplets of rain never reached her skin as it evaporated in midair. The two serpents became distressed as they continued to hover around her. Her heart broke as she clinched her little fists. Ribbons of energy swirled around her and captured the two serpents hovering above her. The evil incarnates struggled to break free, but were instantly turned to dust from Kagome's immense power.
"Insolent little girl," Tsubaki shouted gritting her teeth as she watched her serpents turn to dust before they even reached the ground. She took a step and raised her sword to attack.
"No…" Kagome whispered, not even looking at Tsubaki. With only a hand, she blocked Tsubaki's sword, and it shattered into pieces upon impact.
The dark miko gasped as she stumbled backwards. Some of the sword's shards had hit her, and now she limped. She stared alarmingly at Kagome's form.
"You're…You're her," Tsubaki tried to say when she had realized who Kagome was. She had never believed in the prophecy of Midoriko's heiress even when she had been a Sanggre, as she had believed that she was the most powerful among the Sanggre priestesses. Right now, she doubted that. But Kagome was just a child and she was sure that Kagome hadn't mastered her powers yet. She smirked as she formulated a scheme.
"I don't think so," Kagome whispered chillingly, sending shivers down Tsubaki's spine. How could a 10-year-old girl say that with so much hate and a promise of death? Kagome pierced her with a deadly look. Her eyes had turned steel blue and a hateful, yet immensely powerful silver swirled in her gaze's midst.
Tsubaki trembled.
"How could you?" Kagome continued to murmur under her breath as if possessed. She surveyed her surroundings. And more silver swam in her orbs as she witnessed her clan being slaughtered: the lifeless and muddy form of her mother, the whole complex burning to the ground, her fellow Sanggre being burned alive, butchered and even eaten by the demons. Weren't they just here for the Sanggre's summer gathering? Hadn't her father told her that this trip was supposed to be fun?
She shut her eyes as she tried to block all those images, but it was too much that all she could see in her mind were the deathly looks of the people she once knew and loved. No matter what she did, she could still see the lifeless forms of her kin, the fire and the blood that now engulfed the beautiful place that she had called her second home. And it was just too much… just too much for a child like her to handle. It suffocated her.
The earth shook as the ribbons of energy surrounding her became one full blast that tripled her size, and in a split second…
BOOM!
Like a bomb, a blinding light burst from within her purifying everything, killing every demon on its path, even extinguishing the fires that burned the buildings. The blast brought Tsubaki on her knees as she fell on the muddy ground. Tsubaki held her chest as she gasped for breath, feeling her life drained away by the minute. And it did, as her youthful pale skin wrinkled; her voice cracked; her joints stiffened, and her energy was sucked away from her. Her life force dwindled. Her life span cut four folds, and she fell face first into the mud.
A deafening scream of "NO" was heard from Kagome as she ran towards Akira, who had fallen to his knees as blood oozed from his wound. She would have caught and cradled him before he hit the ground, but he was excessively heavy for her. She hugged him tightly and sobbed.
"Papa! Don't go! Please don't go!" Kagome pleaded as she cried.
"Shhh…" Akira comforted her. "No need to cry, Little One…."
"No," she shook her head stubbornly while Akira smiled lovingly at her, coughing as he struggled to breathe.
"Do you remember what I've told you?" he rasped, as he wiped her tears.
She nodded.
"Be strong, Kagome. Remember that Mama and I love you so much. I am just sad that I can't be with you for long," he rasped, as his tears fell.
"No!" Kagome shouted at him and jabbed her little fist on his shoulder.
Chuckling, he said, "I'm just sad that I can't watch you grow into a woman like your mother. Can you kick the ass of the man that you'll love for me? As I will not be able to do that."
"No! You're not going to die! I will not forgive you if you do!" she insisted as more tears trailed down her cheeks.
Akira held both her cheeks and stared at his daughter's pretty face. He looked at her eye to eye.
"You will do great things, Kagome. And your Mama and I will always smile down upon you from the heavens… Always… My Kagome…" he whispered as he draw his last breath, closing his eyes forever.
Stifled sobs filled the dimly lit bedroom as the curled form on the bed trembled and whimpered in her sleep. Azure pools opened languidly to stare at a dark empty space.
That dream again. Kagome thought as a hint of silver swirled in the midst of her eyes. She had been having that dream each night for the past week. And her dreams had been becoming clearer, lengthier and alarmingly more real every time she dreamed. So vivid, yet so clear that she could almost smell and taste the metallic tinge of blood in the air that horrible night 12 years ago. It made her stomach revolt, and she ran straight towards the bathroom and threw up.
"What are you telling me Papa?" Kagome asked herself as she faced her 22-year-old reflection. She held her father's enchanted beads and absently twiddled with it.
Water dripped from her washed face and hit the sink. The sound of dripping water echoed throughout the bathroom. She wiped her face with the towel and stared at her tired expression. Eerie silence filled the room. The air around her heated up as the mark on her hand lit silver.
Her heart stopped. A shiver ran up her spine. And she whispered dreadfully, "Something's wrong… Something's coming… And it's coming for me."
AN: This is formerly Walking Fate. I've decided to change the title again and to revise several points in the story. I've been really excited about this plot but my first attempt to write it has disappointed me a bit because I can't seem to go beyond the 4th chapter. And I just don't want to write random things and ruin the original plot that I've envisioned, so I'm starting over. ;)
