Synopsis: there was another young Avenger, and she was the very, very best of all.
Disclaimer: not mine!
The Next Mary Sue: Plague of Tomorrow
Tony was holding baby Henry Pym in his arms when James asked him the same thing as usual:
"Tony, tell us the story!"
Then there were three little voices begging him for the story again and the former businessman had no other choice than doing it:
"And there came a day unlike any other when Earth's mightiest heroes were united against a common threat."
Then Tony sensed that something was wrong. Three little voices? Azari and Pym hadn't said their first words yet. What was going on?
"The Soldier, the God, the Knight, the Spy, the Giant, the King, the Pixie, the Ghost, the Archer, the most awesome man ever and the most awesome woman ever."
Okay, someone was tampering with his speech. This was getting dangerous. Tony turned around slowly and discovered a new bed in the room. The bed was made of gold, embedded with big emeralds and rubies, and there were dozens of fluffy stuffed unicorns on the pink sheets.
"On that day the Avengers were born to fight foes that no single hero could withstand. Time-traveling conquerors, alien invaders, and masters of evil. The Avengers vanquished them all."
There was a baby girl in the bed. She had pink hair, purple eyes and a big raven-shaped tattoo on her left cheek. She was also holding an old golden locket and clutching a katana that was bigger than her. And she was reading a book by William Shakespeare.
"And finally, when the world was at peace, the heroes built lives of their own. The Soldier and Spy fell in love, as did the Giant and the Pixie. The King found his Queen. The Thunder God returned to his kingdom far away from the world of men. And the most awesome man ever and the most awesome woman ever got married somewhere in space, between the sea of yellow mermaids and the cliff of sparkling vampires."
Tony was feeling uneasy. However, he knew he had to pretend that everything was normal. Even if his story didn't make sense at all, he had to tell it anyway. Better letting the Mary Sue believe she was in control.
"And one by one the children of the Avengers came to be, children who would one day become a new generation of heroes."
Baby Pym was now asleep. Tony put him back into his crib and glanced at the other kids. They were all staring at the pink-haired girl – wait, her hair was changing color now – with worried eyes.
"But in time evil returned, an evil called Ultron. Ultron wanted nothing less that total dominion over the world."
Tony walked to the bunk beds, ruffled James' hair and gestured him to lie down. Then he bent down and put a kiss on Torunn's forehead. He tried to put Azari back into his own bed but the little boy just didn't want to let go of his "sister"'s arm. He was too afraid of the purple-eyed girl – wait, her eyes were now golden.
"But the Avengers stood in its way. Sadly, their defeat was inevitable."
Tony gave up. It didn't matter if Azari slept in someone else's bed for once. He patted his back and went to check is Pym was still asleep.
"But before they fell, the Avengers hid their children in a faraway place where they would grow up safe from Ultron's grasp, because the Avengers knew that as long as the children were alive, there was hope, hope for the future."
The kids were all asleep now, or pretending to. Tony walked to the golden bed and lifted the Mary Sue. His heart was pounding but he knew what he had to do. If he didn't do it now, the girl would distort reality even more and grow up to become the center of their universe. The boys would all compete for her attention and Torunn would beg her to become her best friend… he couldn't allow this to happen.
"Tony, what are you doing?" the baby Mary Sue asked him while he was walking to the kitchen.
"Shhh, don't worry!" he whispered. "I just want to give you a little treat because you're the one I like the most."
He remembered the days just before the Avengers were killed. They had all promised that if any of them was to die, the other ones would take care of their orphaned kids and raise them like their owns. Now his friends were all either dead or gone. He was the one who had to protect those innocent souls.
"A treat?" the pink-haired girl babbled. "Like the things my father Spider-Man or my mother Scarlet Witch or my godfather Nick Fury or my father Wolverine used to give to me? And will you tell me about the prophecy about me saving the world? And do… What are you doing with this frying pan, Tony? Are you going to…"
Mary Sue never finished her sentenced because Tony Stark knocked her out with said frying pan. Then he dumped her into the garbage can and put the lid back on. This is what everyone should do with a Mary Sue.
The end!
