That Moment You Chose to Stop Fighting It:
Emma's POV*
I looked up from the storybook, Henry had followed his grandparents on their trip around the dinner, not wanting to lose sight of the uncle he had just met, and I was left alone at the booth. I had pulled it towards me then, taking a moment to really just take it in. Me, adult me, in the story book. With Killian. I know that the getting to this image was rough. He was only with me in the first place because he was about to try and convince me not to run, but that is who I am, or well, was.
But I know that I wouldn't have been able to make it back here without him, and I realized during our little adventure in the past, exactly how much I don't mind having him around. He definitely keeps life interesting. Seeing us there dancing together, it made me think back to the moment the image captures.
His arms came around me, the hold necessary for the dance as he swept me onto the floor. "There is only one rule. Pick a partner who knows what he's doing." That stupid (handsome) smirk lit his face and he proved his point, blending us into the crowd. For a moment I saw it, what could have been. I was after all born a princess of that realm, but had never actually been able to be a princess; to experience balls and gowns and suitors and the like, but here, with the smirking pirate as a partner, I was getting my first glimpse at what my life would have been like if my parents could have found a way to stop Regina that didn't require me growing up alone. I couldn't help but grin up at him in pure joy, and I wasn't let down by the look on his face, for pretty much the whole night, (minus the jail and Evil Queen parts) when he had watched me get to be a Princess for once. He smiled more naturally in those few moments than I had ever seen him before.
I was happy in the picture. There in Killian's arms I was truly accepting who I was, or at least could have been, and I was enjoying and the image in the book showed it all. Killian. The thought of him made me realize that I hadn't seen him here. Not during my father's speech, or the naming of the baby, not even now. The woman we saved was here, sitting quietly, a look of shock and wonder on her face, but no Captain. I suddenly felt the urge to once more be in his presence.
I left Granny's with the intent on tracking him down, only to find him sitting on Granny's patio, nursing his ever constant companion, the Rum bottle, and looking deep in thought about something.
I immediately changed course, heading in his direction, and as I got to his table he looked up, my steps bringing him back to the present and away from wherever he had been moments ago. "So, do you think Rumpelstiltskin is right? I'm in the book now." I saw his smile, but I needed to say what was on my mind. "He said that everything but our little adventure would go back to normal. Do you think it is?" Because honestly I was curious and wanted to hear his thoughts. He continued fidgeting with the bottle, not fully meeting my eyes. "He's right. Otherwise I would remember that damn bar wench I kissed." The smirk was soft but still a smirk. I returned one of my own, fighting a smile and losing. "How would that prove anything?" The smirk was back full force now, and the eyebrow quirk, "Because I know how you kiss. I would have gone after her. But I didn't my life went exactly as it had before." I could sense some insecurity there, but I let it go with a playful, yet soft, "it must have been the rum." The smile was weak at best that I was offered in return, but it came with a compliment of sorts.
"Everything is back to normal. You're a bloody hero Swan." Before he even fully finished I added, "so are you." His little laugh let me know he didn't quite believe me. "I wanted to thank you Killian." That caught his attention, especially the dip in my voice and the soft way I said his name. He was looking at me now, nothing to do but finish what I started. I paused for a brief moment before charging on. He waited, patient as always for me to continue.
"For going back for me in the first place, in New York, if you hadn't…" He barley let me finish the smile disarming as ever alongside the cocked eyebrow as he said that it was the right thing to set my heart racing more, and I was curious. How. So I voiced it.
"How did you do it? How did you get to me?" I could tell it wasn't what he expected to follow. He looked down for a moment and then, seemingly resigned, began his story. His blue eyes found mine and all I could do was listen.
"Well the curse was coming so I ditched my crew and took the Jolly Rodger as fast and as far as I could to out-run it." The doubt I felt at that statement slipped out. "You out ran a curse?" The small smile of pride belittled the truth of the next statement, "I'm a hell of a Captain." The slight smirk it brought, his confidence in himself made me chuckle slightly. Then he got back on course. "Once I was outside the curses purview I knew that the walls were down. Transport between worlds was possible again. All I needed was a magic bean." My curiousity piked. A bean, but how? So of course I mentioned it.
"Those are not easy to come by." His nod belied the truth and his solution, "It is if you have something of value to trade…" He trailed off, and I couldn't help it. I needed the final piece to the puzzle that started the last crazy month or two of my life. "And what was that." His deep breath before I finished the question was missed at first. Then the confident, cocky Captain Hook answered, "Why the Jolly Rodger of course." That took a moment to process, that was… shocking.
I couldn't wrap my head around it. I could see the slight pain on his face, that ship had been his love, his home, for centuries. He was a pirate captain who traded his ship for a bean so he could get back… seemingly to… "You traded your ship for me?" I could hear the shock, and awe in my voice. No one had ever done that, or anything of that magnitude for me before. I wasn't used to being handed such irrevocable evidence of the amount someone cared about me.
Killian Jones stepped out from behind the mask, with a soft and hesitant, "aye," that set my world spinning for a moment. He wasn't lying. He really had given up his everything, his past, his link to his family, in order to get to me and Henry. I couldn't help it, couldn't deny him anymore, not after he revealed something like that.
I chose to stop running in order to get back here, and that meant not running from not only my family, but him, and the things he was beginning to make me see. We kissed and it was everything and nothing like that kiss we shared in Neverland. That kiss had been passion and fire, I could never resist a challenge. This one was fire inducing, but different. Oh there was passion, but it wasn't an all-consuming burn. It was a slow soft caress of a glimpse at what could be. Of what we could be. I hadn't felt this for someone, ever. It was different with Killian.
With Neal it was the new and exhilarating rush. I thought I had found someone that understood, and would never make me feel the loss and pain that we had both grown up running from. I had been so wrong. Oh Neal was wonderful, for our brief time, but he was also selfish, and chose to let me take the fall, to run when he could have stayed.
From the moment I met Captain Hook he had proved that he understood me. It was similar to what it was like with Neal, but this time, this time I didn't want to be understood. But he is pigheaded. I will never forget him clinging to a side of a beanstalk we were supposed to be climbing and stating "I love a challenge." With that smirk and the bright confidence. I was an open-book to him yes, but that didn't mean that I would make it easy. (I haven't.)
But he did, and continues to do what Neal didn't. He stayed. Even when it got hard, or things looked awful. He followed me into a portal with no idea where we going just a few hours ago. He came back with that bean to save the town, and helped save Henry, and David. We wouldn't have made it in Neverland, or off of Neverland without him, and he didn't want to go when he was forced to. And to get back to me he traded his ship, his lively hood, his life, to do so.
I wasn't ready for love yet, at least not that I would admit, but I was ready to begin seeing if I could have that exhilierating, all-consuming care and concern that he had shown me, and that I on a few (many) occasions had returned. I was ready for this now. For the kisses and everything I knew would eventually come with it. It wouldn't be easy, but I didn't need easy, I just needed it. It was another thing I hadn't realized I needed until today.
We pulled apart for a moment, but it was magnetic. We both leaned back in, identical smiles stretching across our faces. Today was the day I chose to stop running away. Today was the day I chose to start looking for others to care and love for me and I them. Today was the day that I realized that while Captain Hook wasn't all that bad, behind the mask and the eye-liner, Killian Jones was a man that was capeable of making me weak in the knees with one well executed smirk, or the lifting of one perfect eyebrow in that sardonic way of his, and make me see that the world was a little bit brighter when we just accept that people care and want to help, and that a little trust could go a long way.
Today was the day I realized that I was starting to fall for him. For the man Killian was behind the mask of revenge and bravado. That man wasn't all bad, but the man beneath, he taught me it was okay to be vulnerable, and he would continue to get around my walls in the days, weeks, months to come. I couldn't be more ready. I was done pulling away from him. It was time to start seeing where this could go. And yes, captain Hook could kiss, but Killian Jones? His kisses were magnetic in a whole new way.
