Knowing She's There
By Somewherethatsgreen
Rating: PG
Spoilers: It's a post-ep for "The Hunger Artist." So, needless to say, it will contain spoilers for that episode.
Summary: Gil gets some bad news; how will he deal? A story about the women in his life.
Author's Notes: This isn't going to be like "Sara's Secret Life." This one will actually get finished, I promise. A sequel to "Photographs and Memories" is in the works too. Oh yeah, and the title is from a Dr. Hook song which may or may not be used in a later chapter.
Standard Disclaimer: CSI belongs to Anthony Zuiker, CBS, and a bunch of people who aren't me. Grissom's Grandma is mine though.


CHAPTER 1: A Grandmother's Advice

The doctor had confirmed what he had suspected all along.

Gil had known that he was at increased risk for the disease that had afflicted his mother, eventually causing her to lose her hearing, so although he had been hoping for a different diagnosis, he was not surprised by the one he had received.

Finding out was easy compared to what he had to do next. There were people who would have to be told.

The first thing he did when he got home was go to the telephone. He pressed the buttons slowly, forming a number that he tried to dial at least once a month, although it was one of the few things that he sometimes failed to get done. The voice that answered was female, aged, and gentle.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Nana... It's Gil."

Gilda Grissom, at 95, was the matriarch of the Grissom clan. Whenever anyone in the family got engaged, had a baby, or bought a new car, she was the first to know. She also handled the more solemn task of circulating bad news concerning members of the Grissom family.

"So," Gilda teased, "you finally decide to call your old grandmother."

"Sorry. I've just..."

She cut him off. "Oh, I know you've been busy. So, tell me, how are you?"

This was going to be more difficult than he had anticipated.

"I need to tell you something."

"Well, go on then. You can tell me anything, you know that."

"I, uh... I've been having some problems lately, with my hearing, so I went to the doctor today, and, well..." he paused there, hoping that his grandmother would put the pieces together herself. She did, and she gasped softly as she realized what he meant.

"You have it, then? That ear disease, that your mother has?"

One word, that was all he needed to say. One difficult word. "Yes."

"Oh," Gilda sighed. "So this means that eventually..."

It came easier this time. "Yes, it does."

"Well," said Gilda, unsuccessfully trying to mask the pain in her voice, "I don't doubt that you can get yourself through this. You're a Grissom. We've been through worse."

"I know."

"Although, sometimes, I..." she trailed off.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, it's nothing," she said, but she sounded like she was on the verge of tears. Gil refused to be satisfied with her answer.

"Nana, I know it's something. What is it?"

"Oh..." She began to cry softly. "I just wish you weren't alone, Gil. I worry about you. Your brothers and sisters and cousins are all either married or live close to home. You live out there in the desert and you don't have anybody."

"It's not exactly the desert, Nana. And I have you, don't I?"

"But I'm not there with you! Listen to me Gil." She was regaining her composure, and she spoke firmly. "You are about to enter a very difficult time in your life. It is impossible to face it alone. Now, I know how proud you are. You were always like that; you never wanted anyone's pity. But like it or not, everyone needs companionship. It's a fact of life."

There were few things Gil argued with his grandmother about, but this was a hot spot for him. "I know what you're saying. You're telling me the same thing you've been telling me for years, to 'settle down.' Well, I don't have to. I'm fine on my own."

"At least think about what I said, Gil."

"Nana, I appreciate the concern, but really, I'm fine."

"I hope so." There was a silence that followed, long and heavy.

"I should go," said Gil. "I have other things to take care of."

"Alright. You take care of yourself, sweetheart. Call me and let me know how you're doing, alright?"

"I will, I promise. I love you."

"I love you too... Oh, call Mom and Dad for me, okay? They'll take it better from you. And tell them..." He thought for a minute, then made up his mind. "Tell them I'm coming to visit soon."

"Oh!" Gil could not see the smile on his grandmother's face, but he could hear it in her voice. "I'll be sure to tell them. See you soon, dearie."

After hanging up the phone, Gil thought about what his grandmother had told him. In all the years he had known her, he had learned that she was right about almost everything, but she had to be wrong about this. Romance was great for other people, but not for him. His work was his life, and it was all he needed.

But then, he remembered... as the disease progressed, his one true love, his work, might eventually be lost to him forever.

He would have to tell his co-workers, of course. This wasn't something he could keep hidden from them for long. But there was no need to say anything just yet. Right now, there was somewhere he wanted to go. He hadn't realized until just a few minutes ago just how much he missed his mother. There were many things to sort out at work, but they could wait.

He wanted to go home.