Chapter 1

Normal perspective

Remus Lupin headed back to his dorm, limping on his right leg. When people passed by, his hurriedly put a strained amount of weight on his leg to make it look like he wasn't limping. Most people didn't notice at all, and didn't give him a second glance. To them, he was just a little bookworm, teacher's pet, and practically unnoticeable. But really, he was much more.

He was constantly shivering slightly, in fear of what would happen when they found out.

They will abandon you like the filth you are. You do not deserve to have friends, the wolf told him. Remus tried to ignore the voice, but he couldn't help but agree a little bit. People that were untainted shouldn't have to be around him. He was a monster. Monsters didn't have friends.

Friends . . . Remus smiled a little bit. He had found people who wanted to be friends with him. Maybe not when they found out who he was, but they treated him nicely, and didn't look at him with looks of disgust . . . yet. A frown wiggled onto his face when he remembered good things were not to be attached too much to. They always ended.

All through his childhood, he was kept away from the other children and was constantly told that he was a monster—one that deserved to die. The only thing from preventing him from going completely suicidal and depressed was his mother. She would stay outside his room on full moons, and comfort him afterwards. Remus believed he didn't deserve that, but she insisted he was not a monster: you are a little boy Remus. You did not deserve this curse.

"Dancing hinkipunks," Remus announced to the fat lady. She gestured politely, and the portrait swung open. In the common room, he resisted the urge to collapse on the couch out of sheer exhaustion—somewhat.

Remus sat down on the soft chair by the warm fireplace and told himself he would only sit down for a while to replenish his strength—the walk up from the hospital wing had tired him even more. He closed his eyes slowly and let himself soak in the warm heat that was pulsing from the fire. Suddenly, his lids felt like lead, and he fell into the darkness called sleep.

After the monthly transformations, Remus usually was exhausted, which was proved when Lily Evans discovered Remus sleeping on the couch. She hesitantly shook his shoulder, "Remus?"

In reply she got a groan, and Remus rolled slightly to the side, away from her.

Lily sighed in exasperation, "Remus!" She prodded her ribs until he was jolted awake by a rather impatient Lily. "Morning sunshine!" Lily chirped. Remus moaned in reply—he felt horrible after the tiring stress his body had been put under and did not feel anything as energetic as the sun.

"Wha?" He mumbled.

"Remus, it's almost eight, breakfast is almost done," Lily said.

Remus snapped up, "Did I miss class?! I've already missed enough classes!" He groaned and flopped back down on the couch.

"Geez," Lily was a bit surprised at Remus's reaction. Sure he missed classes once every month so he could visit his sick mum, but besides that . . . . She remembered Sev's accusation.

"Lily, somethings odd about that Lupin kid. Where does he escape every month?" Severus "Sev" Snape asked as they watched the giant squid make it's way across the lake.

"He visits his sick mother," Lily said, wasn't it obvious? Well . . . that's was he said.

"That's highly unlikely, anyways, whatever it is, Potter, Black, and Pettigrew are oblivious of it," Sev said airily, seemingly pleased that he was the first one to notice it.

"But what else is it, if it isn't his mother?" Lily asked, getting curious now.

"He's a," Sev lowered his voice, "Werewolf."

"Werewolf?" Lily asked with great disbelief. She also took note of how Sev's voice seemed to be laced with disgust when he called Remus a werewolf. How could kind, shy Remus be a werewolf? They were dark creatures, and Remus was defiantly not the killer type.

"It fits, every time he leaves it's on the full moon, and he looks sick enough that it might as well be him that's the ill one, not his mum. But it fits—usually werewolves are like that during the full moon," Sev said. Lily tried to ignore the ring of truth of his words, but she wanted a real answer for once. She didn't like seeing all the cuts and bruises Remus would come back every visit.

Lily was still staring at Remus in a weird way for quite a while, so Remus was starting to get worried. Does she know? He asked the wolf. Nah, she doesn't know. She'd be running in terror if she did, the wolf snickered at Remus's saddened reaction.

"Um . . . Remus . . ." Lily started. Okay, she was going to do it this time, she was going to ask him where he went and then there would be no more unknown worrying.

Fear gripped Remus—she knew! He knew that she knew. Wait for it . . . the wolf sneered, just wait kid, she'll be screaming and running soon. Suddenly Remus felt ashamed. He had studied and talked with Lily . . . he had no right to. He was filth—nothing more. A monster. A killer.

"A-are you a werewolf?" Lily's voice quivered. They had different reactions to it. Remus assumed it was because she was finally realizing what a monster he was and he braced himself for the talk: I'm sorry Remus, but I can't stand to be friends with such a piece of filth such as you, Remus could already hear the words.

Lily was actually, in reality, shaking with worry for Remus. Would he be all right? Would he trust her? In a dry moment of humor, she thought of this being an activity: the world's most challenging trust activity! She hoped Remus knew that she wouldn't judge him—she was a muggle-born, she knew what it was like to be prejudiced against by the wizarding world. Except he probably had it a lot worse.

Remus sighed inwardly, this friendship had been nice while it lasted. Only two years . . . Remus had hoped at least it would've lasted longer. She at least deserved the truth, "Yes. I am a w-werewolf. I am a monster," Remus bowed his head in shame, expecting the harsh tone that would follow.

Pain seared through his cheek. Lily Evans . . . had . . . had slapped him! Oh yes, he got a harsh tone, but it was not of what he expected. "Remus. John. Lupin. Don't you even dare call yourself that! You are a little boy! You didn't deserve that," Lily said more quietly.

Remus remembered his mother's words: You are a little boy. You do not deserve this curse. The pain barely registered though, his brain was currently digesting what Lily had said. Lily had . . . accepted him. A warm feeling spread through him. Acceptance . . . it was like a warm hug that enveloped you and lifted your worries away. "S-so you don't care that I'm a m—" Remus quickly stopped saying monster as Lily sent him a venomous look.

"Well," she smiled brightly, "Shall we go to breakfast?"

And for once in his life, the wolf was shocked. S-she accepted me. She accepted us! a little triumph was shown in it's voice. Remus smiled to himself, she's different isn't she? And he and the wolf for the first time ever, agreed that Lily Evans . . . she was amazing.

And that was the start of a friendship that would eventually be more important than they ever had imagined.