"Just start at the beginning."
She immediately clenched her hands into tight fists hating that stupid sentence. She had heard it for years now, but she shook her head ignoring what they wanted. It was just too much. Starting at the beginning was too hard it took too much out of her. She tried unclenching her fists for fear that they would take it as an act of aggression, and sedate her again. She didn't want to be sedated once more. Her life was passing her by with the drugs inside her to make her feel better. She stood up and began pacing back, and forth in the small room hating the staleness to it. The walls were painted a soft beige color, and three small meaningless pictures lined the left wall. A small double sized bed sat in the middle of the room with scratchy covers resting on top rumpled from her just getting up. She had two nightstands on either side of the bed, and a small dinette table with two chairs in the far off corner to the room. That was where her doctor currently sat watching as she paced by her.
"Please talk to me."
Her blue eyes slid to the woman, and immediately shook her head as her long blonde hair flew with the motion. The young female doctor sighed, and scribbled something down in her file probably writing that she was beyond help which she already knew. She had known a long time ago when her family gave up on her, that she was destined to be this way forever. Who would take the time to talk to a woman that wouldn't speak because she felt afraid all the time? Her doctor was paid to speak to her, and she did not feel comfortable talking about what the doctor wanted her to speak about, so instead they sat in silence every session. She allowed her eyes to flicker to the lone window in the room which rested on the door. It was a small square box, and it looked to be bulletproof she rolled her eyes apparently they feared that everyone in here was suicidal. Her breath caught as a man walked by that she never seen before in her life. Not many people came on to her side of the institution, and he was surely not a worker as she knew them all. He went from left to right as her eyes tracked him for the brief moment she had seen him. She ran to the door throwing it open needing to see him better.
"Juliet we are not done talking, your session just started!"
She ignored the doctor as she peeked out the door towards the same direction the man had disappeared to, and she caught a glimpse of his back with his hands thrust into his pockets stretching the denim across his backside just before he rounded the corner at the end of the hall. She heard him humming something and his soft tone made her heart flutter at the sound, but it grew distant making her long to hear more. Juliet hadn't ever felt such a strong reaction to another person before, but for some reason she had to meet him. He had this beautiful light surrounding him, and for even the briefest moment of seeing him brought her such a sense of tranquility that she hadn't felt for a very long time. She made a move to exit her room to go see him, but she found herself immobile. She felt hands on her shoulders keeping her from following him, and she turned her gaze on the doctor and glared at her.
"Mmmm." Juliet moaned squirming in the doctor's hold.
"Good job Juliet that was your first ever attempt to speak to me, and it was a very nice try." Juliet shook her head angry that the words she wanted to say weren't coming out. She shoved the hands off of her wishing the feel of them to fade. The doctor's gentle touch sent her back into a time when touches weren't gentle nor welcome. She shook uncontrollably hating the fact that her old wounds still had such a powerful effect on her as the doctor dropped her hands away from her. "Juliet I will never hurt you, you know that." she closed her eyes tightly trying to escape the pain of her past, and she screamed something unintelligible as she shook in the corner of her room. The doctor eyed her with sadness in them, and made a move to exit the room to leave her be. Juliet closed her eyes, and felt the tears leak out. She was always alone, and she would always be. How could anyone want to see a crazy woman like her anyways? Juliet slowly stood up from the corner of her room feeling slightly better, and took small steps to the doorway. The need to see the man was greater than the need to be alone. She looked out and saw that no one was coming over to sedate her.
Juliet walked tentatively out into the hall, and made her way slowly where she had watched the man she had longed to see better had gone. She flicked some hair behind her ears as she rounded the corner not seeing him anywhere. She frowned she knew he had come this way. She walked down the long corridor stopping short when she heard a soft rumbly voice. She closed her eyes listening to him speak she didn't hear the words just his sound, and it was so soothing. She began following the sound of his laughter now which made her smile as she was entering a room his voice was growing louder and louder. He had his back to her looking down at someone in a bed. She must have been quiet entering because he didn't turn around, but she knew this was the same man she had been searching for. Her eyes flickered from the top of his styled dark brown hair, down his broad back, to his butt, all the way down to his sneakers.
"Shawn get me out of here!"
"Dude you were the one to tell them that you drive the blueberry it wasn't their fault they didn't know you meant a blue Echo, and not a piece of fruit!"
"Shawn get me out of here this second!" Juliet watched the man in the bed thrash a bit. He was in restraints as she had been in herself a time or two. The man that had a voice that made her feel instantly calm was chuckling, and she found herself smiling once again.
"Gus just keep up the crazy routine, and we will find the real killer who killed Doctor Evens that much quicker. It has to be one of the other doctors here, or possibly a patient."
"Shawn I am not going to pretend I am crazy for a case."
"Oh come on Gus take one for the team. I would have acted all nutso, but you already beat me to the punch about how you couldn't live without Mel."
"Shawn you could have stuck up for me in front of these people! You could have said Mel was my laptop computer, and that she was BROKEN that I needed a new one."
"Dude that is crazy in itself with naming your laptop!" she giggled and she felt her eyes widen when both set of eyes turned and looked at her. She squeaked and made a mad dash to get away embarrassed at having been caught listening to them. Juliet hurried out of the room, and she heard someone calling after her. "Hey ma'am wait a minute." Juliet froze as the man with the beautiful voice called for her, and she immediately stopped as if he was her axis that she orbited around. She turned around slowly and eyed him. He had sparkling hazel eyes, and a boyish lopsided grin on his face. The usual need to be alone didn't come as she stared up into his eyes. She could hear a man shouting behind him, and this man in front of her must be who was being called for.
"I'm Shawn Spencer, and that in there would be Bubba Smith no relation to Bubba Smith from the Police Academy movies unfortunately, but everyone calls him Gus." she smiled loving those movies because she had always dreamt of becoming a police officer herself. He pulled out his right hand from his pocket, and held it out to her. She eyed it for a moment before letting her gaze slide back up to his face. The smile never faded from his mouth, but he did let his hand fall back to his pocket sliding his hand within it once more. "And you would be?" he asked.
Juliet wished she could speak to him as she opened her mouth to say her first words in several years, but nothing made it out but a squeak again. He looked at her with soft eyes.
"Lets just call you Angel, and no don't worry not the vampire dude either. It is because you are so pulchritudinous that you have to be an angel." she tilted her head eyeing him questioningly.
"If you are wondering what pulchritudinous means then you seriously need to get one of those word a day calendars I swear to you they work magic. But to answer your question it means your beauty." Juliet smiled feeling a blush tint her cheeks and he chuckled at her. "Surely I am not the first one to call you beautiful." she ducked her head and just kept her gaze on him shaking her head in agreement that he was indeed the first to call her that. His mouth dropped open.
"Juliet there you are!" Juliet whirled around and saw her doctor walking up to her. She shook her head when she saw the needle in her hand, and she ran behind this man's back peeking out from around him. "Juliet you need to relax and this will help you." the doctor spoke to her kindly, but she shook her head no hiding behind his back grabbing his arm wishing the doctor would leave her alone.
"No offense doctor lady but she seems fine to me aren't you Jules?" he asked and she looked up at him as he turned his head to look at her, and she felt her heart flip at the nickname he gave her. She nodded her head at him, and he looked back at the doctor. "See she's fine. We were just talking about her being pulchritudinous, and what it means."
"She spoke to you?"
"Not in so many words." he smirked at her doctor.
"Which means she didn't speak a word to you." the doctor snapped at him.
"She has just not in oral form more like expressions and actions."
"I don't know who you are but you are not a doctor, and you have no idea what psychological trauma this young woman suffered. She hasn't spoken a word since she got here, and that was over five years ago." he turned and looked at her sadly smiling at her.
"Well just give her time she will talk when she's ready, but filling her up with meds isn't a good way of getting her to open up. It just makes her lethargic, and makes her feel helpless which if she has been through something traumatic means she felt helpless at one time in her life, and most likely she never wants to feel like that again. Instead of making things better you are just making things worse." the doctor opened her mouth and then snapped it shut. Juliet stared up at him, and wondered how he knew how she felt without her expressing it to him?
"I never thought of it that way before."
"Just a helpful hint right Jules?" he looked at her and she nodded. "If you want to help doctor lady you just need to stop filling her up whatever is in there, and let her take the time she needs to get through it. We all need time to get through things." Juliet wondered what he meant by that? Did he need time to get through something himself? Her mouth opened wanting to ask him, but she got frustrated when she couldn't get the words to come out.
"She looks like she wants to ask you something." the doctor said quietly. Juliet nodded her head emphatically. Juliet stepped from around his body motioning for a pen, and the doctor took her pad of paper out and held a pen to her, and Juliet snatched it up happily. She scribbled on the paper and held it out to him. He tilted his head and read it out loud.
"What happened to me?" he read and then looked at her. "Nothing to worry your pretty head about Jules I'm alright." he gave her a lopsided grin, and she searched his eyes wondering what he was hiding? What could have happened to him to make him understand her plight so well?
"This is truly remarkable she hasn't tried to communicate with anyone since coming here I am a bit awed right now. She first attempted to speak with me just a few minutes ago." Juliet rolled her eyes at her doctor hating that she was speaking to Shawn as if she wasn't even there, so she scribbled on the paper showing it to Dr. Milliano. The woman smiled as she looked at the paper, and then at Shawn. "That was why you ran to the door you saw this man walk by and you wanted to meet him?" she nodded her head and Shawn smiled.
"I have that effect on people, and animals too. One time I was accosted by a giraffe. True story Jules." Juliet giggled.
"May I ask who you are Mr…?" the doctor asked Shawn taking his attention away from her causing Juliet to miss his gaze on her.
"I am Shawn Spencer, and my friend was just admitted here an hour ago. He's the one bellowing my name as we speak." he announced pointing his finger over his shoulder, and Juliet could hear his name still being called much more insistently then before. "His name is Mulder and Scully, but you can call him Gus." Juliet grinned widely as he winked at her, and she wondered what the black man's real name was. They seemed to be such good friends she wished she had a friend. But she recalled what she had overheard them speaking about, and she felt fear envelope her. They were searching for a killer which they thought was one of the doctors or even a patient here. She eyed her doctor, and wondered if she could trust her anymore. What if she was the killer he was searching for? She tried to squash the budding fear inside her forcing herself to remember that Dr. Milliano was a nice woman.
"Are you going to be visiting him a lot Mr. Spencer?"
"Sure am Doc."
"It's Dr. Milliano Mr. Spencer. May I interest you in visiting Juliet as well whenever you could spare a moment." Juliet grinned and turned a hopeful gaze to him as he looked down towards her, and he chuckled nodding his head.
"Of course I would want too Jules and I are friends now." she grinned and bounced next to him happily clapping her hands together. She had a friend, her first ever friend. She wanted to say thank you, but nothing came out so she smiled at him, and he smiled down at her. "You're welcome Jules. But I do think I need to go be with my heart broken pal inside, and remind him life is worth living without his dear Mel." Juliet hid a smile knowing it was a laptop rather than a woman as he turned disappearing back into his friend's room. Juliet looked at her doctor who motioned for her to follow her back to her room. Juliet gave one last glance to the room Shawn had disappeared into, and followed the doctor back to her own room with a light bounce to her step.
Author's note: This is my first ever posted story though I have written a ton of Shules stories. I have been always a lurker and finally decided to post. Hope you enjoy this AU story of Shules and the rating of this story will come to play in later chapters that is if you want to see more chapters of this of course!
Thanks for reading and I hope to hear from you guys soon!
