The Simpson Interviews Part One

Lisa: For school I have to interview people around town. Here are their stories.

Law and Order Music Plays

Lisa: Sorry. Start it up.

Tape starts

Lisa: So Barney what do you do?

Barney
I'm a drunk.

Lisa: I mean what is your job?

Barney: I drink beer.

Lisa: As a job?

Barney: I have a hangover.

Lisa: More on him soon.

Static

Lisa: So Apu are you Indian?

Apu: I'm not a damn native american. You stupid little girl. Don't try to rob me. I have eyes in the back of my head.

Apu turns around to show eyes in the back of his head

Lisa: Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Static

Bart: I'm Bart Simpson, who the Censored are you?

Static

Bart appears doing the moon walk

Bart: Who the Censored are you?

Static

Bart: Stop Censored censoring what I'm saying!

Static

Homer: Yummy bacon. I can't believe it's not pig brand. My favorite.

Static

Lisa: I'll be back soon with more. Stay tuned.

Static

The Simpson Interviews Part Two

Lisa: I'm back. Here is some more.

The X-Files Music Plays

Static

Lisa: Mom, do you like being married?

Marge: To your father? No. I want to run away and marry Mel Gibson.

Lisa: But both of you are married!

Marge: Oh...right...next question. You can...edit that right?

Static

Homer: Is there supposed to be smoke in the house?

Static

Lisa: Do you have illegal aliens in the back room?

Moe: Of course not little girl.

Moe runs to the back

Moe: Quick run!

Mexican: Back over the border.

The mexicans run out

Static

Bart: Drama is an art, not a load of Censored crap!

Lisa: Bart!

Bart: Actually drama is crap.

Static

Lisa: Barney are you ready?

Barney burps and falls asleep

Lisa: Guess not.

Static

Homer: I like big boobs and I can't deny...

Marge: Homer!

Homer: I smell smoke. Bacon!

Static

Bart: Milhouse is Fallout Boy.

Milhouse: I'll do an interview for a kiss.

Bart: You suck.

Static

Lisa: We'll be back.

Terminator Music Plays