Denial

A/N: This is the first part of my five-part one-shot series. Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. This is Denial.

Silence. That's all anyone hears after the last cannon sounds. The very last one.

Then...

"She won. She won! SHE WON! LILY WON! SHE WON!" I scream at the top of my voice.

"SHE WON! LILY'S COMING HOME! SHE'S ALIVE!" I hug my mother, who has dissolved into tears of happiness. Her little girl is alive. My little sister is coming home.

Who cares that 23 other children had to die? Who cares that my sister had to kill at least one of them to win? Who cares? I didn't care. My sister was still alive. That's all that mattered.

The front door opens and my father steps into the room, his latest catch of fish slung over his shoulder.

"Did you see?" He shouts, grinning broadly.

"LILY WON!" I scream again. My father drops the fish, picks me up and hugs me, twirling me around like he used to do when I was little.

"I have to tell Jayce" I say and run out the door.

"Rose, come back wait!" I don't hear my mother's shouts for me to return. I run to my best friend's house and knock on his door.

As soon as it opens, I fling myself into Jayce's arms. "She won, she won, she won." I say to him and start to cry.

Jayce smooths out my hair as I cry in his arms. She won. Lily one. My little sister is coming back.

My little sister is-

"Rose." Jayce says, shaking my shoulder. "It's your turn to speak."

I blink and raise my head. The sight that greets my eyes is strange. A bunch of people surrounding a coffin. My mother is at the head, with my father holding her hand next to her. They are both crying. Everyone around the coffin looks solemn, unhappy. All in black.

This is a funeral...

Who died?

"Rose." Jayce says again.

"What?" I whisper back.

"It's your turn to speak." He's looking at me, his eyes are red.

"But, I don't... why me?"

Jayce gives me a confused look. "Are you okay Rose?"

"No, what the Hell is happening?" I demand, backing away from him.

Jayce shakes his head. "You're still in denial."

Denial.

Then I understand.

"No." I whisper.

"Rose..."

"No. No no no no no no No No No NO NO NO NO!" I scream. No it can't be true. She won. I remember that much.

I look at the small coffin. No, I refuse to believe that Lily...

"No, it's not true! You're all lying! Why are you lying to me Jayce?"

"Rose, I'm sorry but Lily's-"

"NO! NO SHE'S NOT! SHE WON! SHE KILLED THE DISRICT TWO GIRL AND SHE WAS THE LAST ONE LEFT!"

"No Rose she didn't. Lily...she-she was strangled during the Bloodbath. She never even came close to winning."

"No she won! I saw! She's not dead! She's not! Stop lying to me Jayce!" I shout at him. How can my best friend be so cruel to me?

"Leave me alone!" I shout him as he tries to grab my hand. I run down the beach., away from the mourners, the liars and the coffin.

No, Lily's alive, she's alive, I saw I remember.

You're in denial Rose.

No she won, she lived through the Hunger Games.

No she didn't even make it past the Bloodbath.

No, you're lying!

No you are. You're lying to yourself.

Denial.

I stop running and fall down into the shallows of the ocean. I cry, my tears mixing with the salt water.

She can't be dead. My little sister can't be dead.

But the coffin, it was made for her. And my parents had been crying. And Jayce had been comforting me.

The wall of denial I make breaks. I remember seeing Lily getting Reaped, wishing I could volunteer for her, knowing I couldn't. Someone had to keep the family together.

I remember the night the chariots paraded through the Capitol. Lily, all beautiful and glowing, dressed up as a mermaid. She smiled and waved out the crowd. They immediatly fell in love with her. Just like everyone of us did in District 4.

Then I remember the Bloodbath, ten tributes had died. My sister...she had been among them.

I cry harder as my denial evaporates. She's dead. Lily's dead. She had been strangled by a huge tribute from District 7 on the first day. She hadn't had a chance. I had been lying to myself that whole time, forcing myself to believe she could come home.

I couldn't lie anymore.

I feel Jayce's arms wrap around me and he picks me up out of the water. He cradles me in his arms. I close my eyes, my sorrow turning to drowsiness.

"Do you need anything Rose?" Jayce whispers to me.

I think for a moment. My sister is dead, what could I possibly want?

I know.

I am able to say three words before I pass out.

"Lie to me."