Disclaimer - I own nothing you recognise.
AN - Please bear in mind while reading that I haven't seen any SVU episode after the end of season 12, so this is very AU.
Semper Fi
Olivia sighed, her eyes glancing over the invitation for the tenth time that morning. It had been the last thing she'd expected to find when she returned home in the early hours after a hard case, and it hadn't helped her sleep. She rubbed her head before resting it in her hands. She'd just been getting herself back to normal.
She'd just been finding out who she was without him, and with a small piece of paper, he'd come barrelling back into her mind like a bowling ball. She didn't blame Maureen, of course. In fact, she found it quite sweet that she'd even think to send the invitation. Olivia felt bad that she would have to send her regrets, but she knew she wouldn't be able to handle a reunion with the Stabler family. Particularly him.
Writing out her apologies quickly, Olivia wrote a check with the orders to have a drink on her on their honeymoon. Putting them both in an envelope, she stuffed the invitation into her desk drawer and pulled out a file. Hopefully they wouldn't draw another case today and she could get home at a reasonable hour.
At the moment, all Olivia wanted to do was sleep.
Walking tiredly up the stairs to her apartment, Olivia sighed. She was so tired. Along with Munch and Finn, she hadn't left the precinct for four days, only snatching an hour here and there in the cribs.
She wasn't expecting to find someone sitting with their back to her door, watching her walk down the landing.
"Maureen? What are you doing here?" Olivia asked, hesitating only for a split second before she leant down to give Maureen a hand up.
"Liv! It's so good to see you!"
"It's good to see you too, sweetheart. Congratulations on the wedding. I'm sorry I won't be there."
Olivia unlocked the door, gesturing for Maureen to proceed her into the apartment.
"Actually... that's why I'm here. I got your letter this morning. I came to make a case for you to be there."
"Maureen..." Olivia sighed, dropping her bag against the sofa.
"Olivia. Just hear me out, okay?"
"Go ahead," Liv replied quietly.
"Growing up, you were always there for all of us. You listened to me, you helped Kathleen, you took abuse from Dickie and didn't hold it against him, and you saved Eli's life. And my mom's. So for those reasons, I want you at my wedding anyway. But... I did have another reason."
"Your father?"
"Yes. He's... he's not the same as he was when he was at SVU. He smiles less, and when he does smile, it's always tinged with sadness. He misses you, Liv."
"Maureen... Elliot knows where I live. He has my phone number, he knows where I work and he has my email address. If he really wanted to contact me, he'd have done it already."
"He believes that you hate him and that you're better off without him. Please, Liv. Come to the wedding. I won't tell him you're coming and you don't have to stay long. I want you to meet James, and... I want you to see me get married. Please?"
Olivia dropped her head to her chest. Maureen had tears in her eyes and Olivia had never been very good at saying no to any of the Stabler family.
"Alright. You win. I'll come to the wedding. At least the ceremony," she murmured, rubbing her temple as she raised her head to look at Maureen. "My invitation was plus one, is that still okay?"
"Of course," Maureen replied immediately, before she hugged Olivia tightly around the waist. "Thank you, thank you, thank you."
"For you? Of course," Olivia smiled, hugging her back.
"I have to go, but I'll see you in a few weeks, okay?"
"You will. Look after yourself, sweetheart."
As Olivia closed the door behind Maureen, she let her head fall against the door and groaned. Why did she get herself into these situations?
"Thanks for coming with me, John," Olivia murmured quietly as the two of them slipped into the back of the church. They'd waited for the last minute on purpose, hoping that they'd be able to get in unnoticed.
"Anything for you," Munch replied with a small smile. "Besides, I'm rather interested in what Stabler's got to say for himself."
"John... I'm hoping I don't really have to talk to Elliot."
"You know it's not going to be that easy," he muttered quietly.
"Yeah, I know. I can hope though, right?"
John squeezed her hand lightly. "It'll be fine, Liv. If you're going to punch him though, go for a gut shot. You don't want to ruin Maureen's wedding pictures with bruises."
Laughing quietly, Olivia ducked her head. "I'm not going to hit him, John."
"Shame."
Before she could reply, the traditional wedding march started, and along with the other guests, Olivia and John stood to await the bride.
Seeing Elliot again for the first time was like being hit by lightning. The first glance of him took her breath away, even as she forced her eyes to move from him to the beautiful young woman on his arm, clad in a spectacular white princess dress. Maureen looked stunning, and Olivia smiled to herself as the two passed them. She was pretty sure that Elliot hadn't seen her, and she was glad about that.
The wedding passed by painfully slow and yet all too fast for Olivia. She took the time to settle herself after seeing Elliot, and she was happy for the reprieve the rather lengthy service gave her, but as the new husband and wife led the way out of the church, she knew it wasn't going to last forever.
Linking her arm through John's, the two of them walked slowly behind the crowd, standing in line to greet and congratulate the newly-weds.
"Olivia! You made it!" Maureen greeted with a bubbly laugh, hugging Olivia tightly. When the two let go, Maureen turned to her new husband.
"This is Olivia Benson, the lady I told you about. Olivia, this is James."
James beamed at Olivia and the two shook hands. "This is John Munch," Olivia added, gesturing to John.
"Liv."
Olivia looked over at Elliot, who was staring at her like he'd seen a ghost. Beside him, stood Kathy and a man Olivia didn't recognise.
"Olivia," Kathy greeted with a wide smile, shocking Olivia by walking over and hugging her. "Thank you for coming. It really meant a lot to Mo."
Olivia nodded. "It's nice to see you again," she replied politely, trying to keep her eyes off Elliot. She could feel his stare though, and as Kathy greeted Munch with a smile, and introduced the man beside her, Olivia's eyes drifted back to her ex partner.
"This is my husband, Micheal."
"I'm sorry, what?" Olivia asked, eyes snapping back to Kathy.
"My husband, Micheal," Kathy repeated, an amused gleam in her eyes.
Olivia stretched her hand out to take the offered one on autopilot, her confusion overpowering her wish to get out of there as soon as possible.
"How long have you been married?" she asked.
"Only a few months," Kathy replied happily.
"Oh. Congratulations," Liv said, unsure of what else to say. "We... uh... we should go. You all probably have photos to take. It was nice to see you all again."
Olivia wrapped her arms around Maureen one more time, taking her hand and squeezing it. "You look beautiful, sweetheart."
"You're not coming to the reception?" Kathy asked, glancing briefly at Elliot.
"Uh... I don't think that'd be the best idea. Besides, we're on call tonight, so..."
"Just come for an hour, Liv? Please?" Maureen asked. "You haven't seen the others yet and they'll all be really happy to see you."
Olivia looked at John who shrugged and nodded, his eyes resting on Elliot, the challenge clear in his expression. Olivia sighed.
"Okay. We'll see you there."
Olivia and John ended up staying almost two hours, socialising with the Stabler children and Kathy and Micheal. Elliot remained close, and Olivia knew he hadn't taken his eyes off her for more than a minute at a time, but with a little bit of manoeuvring, she'd managed to avoid being next to him, and therefore, managed to avoid talking to him.
Finally, Olivia decided she'd had enough, and despite the complaints, they said their goodbyes and walked out of the reception room to the waiting valet.
"Liv, wait!"
"I told you," John muttered under his breath, and she rolled her eyes at him. "Get the car and I'll be with you in a minute?"
He nodded. "Take as long as you need."
Taking a deep breath, Olivia turned to face Elliot.
"What do you want, Stabler?"
"I... uh... I mean, I didn't expect you to be here."
"I wasn't going to be," she admitted. "I sent my apologies to Mo, but she turned up at my apartment and pleaded her case. I never was good at saying no to your kids."
He smiled. "It's... It's so good to see you, Liv. I missed you so much. You have no idea."
Her eyes narrowed. "You think?"
"What?"
"You think I don't know what it feels like to miss someone so much that it's a physical ache? How about being left wondering if twelve years of partnership, twelve years of friendship, were really so worthless that you're not even worth a goodbye? You think you were the only one who suffered, Elliot? You damn well broke me! At least you knew what was happening. At least you made the decisions that hurt you. You left me."
Her last three words came out in a growl, even as angry tears filled her eyes. All the pent up hurt and abandonment was spewing out of her and she was powerless to stop it. Elliot looked like he was being stabbed with every word she spoke, but she couldn't stop them from coming out.
"I'm sorry, Liv. So sorry. I thought I was doing what was best," he whispered. "I thought I was doing the right thing."
She shook her head. "How was leaving without telling me, without at least saying goodbye, the right thing?"
"If I had come to you, I wouldn't have been able to go through with it. One look at you and the resolve I had would have been shot to shit. I couldn't face you. I know it was a cowardly way to act, and you have every right to hate me. I'm sorry, Liv."
She sighed, looking down. Arguing over the past wasn't doing either of them any good, and honestly, it wasn't going to change what had happened. She'd gotten over it, for the most part. She'd always miss him, she knew that, but... what was the point in hurting them both?
Looking back up at him, she nodded. "I should go. It was... good to see you again. Goodbye, El."
Turning around, Olivia walked to the car where John was waiting, and climbed in. As he pulled out of the car park, tears streamed down her face as they drove away from the only man she'd ever truly loved.
Three days later, the first flower arrangement arrived. A mixture of red and pink carnations, with a few geraniums added in, sat waiting for her on her desk when she returned from a crime scene. When she opened the small card that accompanied them, two words told her where they'd come from.
Semper Fi.
Bastard. Though she was half tempted to throw the arrangement away, she didn't. Instead, they sat on her desk until home time, where she arranged them in a vase and spent most of the night looking at them.
Three days after that, Belgian chocolates were delivered, with a card that read the same. Semper Fi.
The pattern continued, with more flowers, a beautiful pair of ruby earrings, and the matching necklace. Each time, the card had the same two words written on it.
Three weeks after the first arrangement arrived, and Olivia was coming apart at the seams. She wasn't sleeping, hadn't eaten much, and her mind was a mess. Don had sent her home with the strict order to take a few days off. After taking a hot shower, she slumped on the sofa in her plaid pyjama bottoms and a tank top. She didn't want to take time off work.
Time off work meant time to think, and thanks to Elliot, that was the last thing she needed at the moment. She just wanted some peace.
The knock on her door put paid to that idea.
With a quiet groan, she stood up, padding over to the door. Opening it, she was only a little bit surprised to find Elliot on the other side, looking nervous but determined.
"Decided to deliver your latest offering in person, huh?" she asked, stepping back to let him in.
"You got them, then?"
"Yes. Thank you. I'm not sure I understand why you sent them though."
She closed the door and retook her seat, gesturing to him to sit down.
"I miss you, Liv. Seeing you at Mo's wedding... I thought about you every day before that, but now I can't get you out of my mind."
"So you thought you'd mess with mine."
"What? No! I've been trying to show you how sorry I am, how much I care about you. Liv, please."
She dropped her head into her hands. "I don't know what you want from me, Elliot."
He sighed, lifting his hand to rest under her chin, pushing her head up to look at him. "I just want you. In any way you'll let me have you."
Her breath caught as she stared at him.
"I love you, Olivia."
He leant in slowly, giving her time to pull away, but she didn't. She leant forward instead, closing the gap between them as their lips met in a desperate kiss. Tongues battled for control as her hand slid up behind his neck and his moved to the small of her back.
When she pulled back, her cheeks were wet with tears.
"Promise me, Elliot."
"Anything."
"Promise me, you won't leave again when shit gets hard."
Holding her eyes with his own, he replied solemnly, "That's the easiest promise I'll ever have to make. I promise I'll never leave you again, Liv. I love you."
"I love you, too."
