Sorry to those few who read and enjoyed my original chapters. I lost myself in real life and stopped writing. The good news is I have started again and this little bundle of joy I started when I was a teenager is once again in the works. Slowly but surely since I now have kids and school to deal with.

A note to all those who read this many, many, many, many years ago. I am reposting. The entire first few chapters and I have made changes. Sorry for any mistakes I am terrible at editing and I post mostly via phone since right now the only Internet I have is on my phone. Thank you to those who left me such encouraging words. You are the reason I have decided to venture back into the world I had started creating. I hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: Don't own The Phantom of the Opera or any characters or ideas that don't come from my head.

Chapter 1

The Beginning

Jen stood at the large bay windows in her bedroom. She was getting ready to go to bed but was putting it off. She was so lonely since Erik died. She didn't want to go to bed alone, so she stood at the window looking out at the calm, cloudless night. The moon was full and looked like it took up the whole sky. She loved looking at the moon. It calmed her. She couldn't explain why it calmed her, ever since she could remember she would sit outside at night staring up at the sky.

"Ouch." She grunted in pain putting a hand to her stomach. She had been having cramps all day. "Ugh." She moaned the pain causing her to double over. This was the worst that it had been. She felt panicked, was she in labor? Her stomach tightened as pain washed over her. She fought to calm her breathing as she began to panic. Her thoughts flew as she walked slowly to her bed and sat down. Breathing heavily she reached over and grabbed her phone. This was her first child and since her husband, Erik, had died she was all alone. She was hit by another contraction and she slid off the bed as she curled around her stomach. Gritting her teeth she dialed her doctor's emergency number. He had given it to her just in case something happened since she was by herself.

"Hello," Dr. Glenn answered sleepily. It was late and he had probably been in bed.

"Doctor, I think I am having contractions. Ohhhhh." She panted her voice tight. They were coming closer together. It was happening so fast.

"Jen is that you?" He heard her moan into the phone again. "Jen I am on my way." He hung up the phone. Jen curled up on the floor groaning in pain. It seemed like forever before she felt his hands on her. "Come on Jen lets stand up and get up on the bed." She let him help her stand up. Breathing heavily she sat on the bed. She struggled to scoot into the middle of the bed.

"There you go now relax." The doctor said trying to keep her calm. She was gasping for breath and he was worried she was going to pass out. "Concentrate on your breathing. Take deep breaths." She lay back on the bed moaning.
"Doctor I don't know if I can do this. It hurts so much." She practically screamed at Dr. Glenn.

"Jen you can do this. I need you to relax. I am going to check to see how far along you are." He lifted her legs and reached under her nightdress. "Jen we don't have time to get to the hospital but it will be all right. It will all be over soon." He moved around the room getting the room ready for the baby. He could hear Jen taking deep breaths as he searched for the items he would need. At least she was starting to calm a little bit. Once he found everything and was satisfied everything was ready he positioned Jen on the bed in preparation for her to give birth. "All right Jen. It is time to start pushing." He put pillows behind her back to set her up, and then moved to her feet to get in position to help her have her baby.

"Come on Jen, push!" he called to her as she lay puffing on the bed.

"Ohhhhhh, Get it out of me. I can't!" She screamed.

"One more time, come on." He said his voice firm but calm. She strained one last time and fell back in relief as she heard a tiny cry come from the doctor's arms. She lay there breathing heavily; she heard a horrified gasp come from Dr. Glenn.

"What is the matter!" she cried fearfully, trying to sit upright. He hesitated. "What is wrong?" she cried almost hysterically. Dr. Glenn brought the child to her and when she saw what he held in his arms she screamed in terror. The doctor looked down at the child in his arms. The child was pale and looked malnourished. It was almost skeletal and you could see the bones underneath the skin. There was not an ounce of fat on the child. It was not the appearance of her child's body that had made Jennifer cry out. It was the face of her child that was something out of a nightmare. The skin was drawn tight over the skull and the nose was thin and barely there. Almost as if the cartilage had not formed all the way. The face reminded the doctor of pictures he had seen of mummies. Then the child opened its eyes and he was transfixed. The eyes were pitch black, and he could see a glint of light deep inside them. He pulled his eyes away from the child's feeling skewered by that gaze. The top of the child's head was bald and wrinkled covered with patches of white hair as if the child was already old. The doctor felt strange as he looked at the child. He had never seen or heard of a child being born looking like this. He knew that the child should be dead he looked like he had not formed completely in the womb or had been staving for a long time. The Doctor looked at Jen as she calmed enough to talk.

"What is wrong with my child?" She said fearfully. She almost didn't want to ask.

"I don't know." He lay the child down in the bassinet that had been waiting beside the bed. He carefully checked the child over to make sure that the child was healthy despite his looks. "He is breathing well and he is alert. Other than how he looks he seems healthy, which is strange because he looks like he should be dead. If I saw a child like this come into my office I would send it to the hospital, but usually a child that looks like this is barely conscious and listless. Your child is quite the opposite. What will you name him?" He cleaned the baby up and wrapped him in a clean blanket. He was curious about the child and what caused him to look like he did. He handed the boy to him mother and she hesitated before taking a deep breath and closing her eyes as she accepted the child.

"I will name him Erik after his father." She said quietly looking away from her son, remembering her deceased husband and his wish for their first boy to be named after him, forgetting momentarily the horror she felt when she saw the child. The doctor thought this was a good sign. He looked at the child in his mother's arms and wondered what the future had in store for this small family. He noticed that she had yet to really look at Erik.

The Doctor watched her closely as he showed her how to feed Erik. He saw the disgust in her eyes and how she didn't hold him as tightly as he had seen other mother's hold their children. It was almost like she could not wait to put Erik down. He thought it was a good sign that she at least is making an attempt to take care of Erik. He hoped that overtime she would be able to really form a bond with her son. He feared for the child. He knew how cruel the world could be and he wondered what kind of a future this child had. He had sworn never to hurt anyone, but he wondered if it would be more humane to put this child out of its misery. It would never be able to have a normal life. He sighed and knew that he would never be able to hurt any healthy child, but he could not shake the feeling he had that leaving the child alive was a mistake.

He went around the room cleaning up the mess from the birth asking Jen where clean sheets were so he could make up a fresh bed for her to stay in. After he cleaned up he stayed longer to make sure both mother and child were going to be all right. He finished cleaning and hesitated by the bed.

"Jen I want you to bring the child into the hospital. Right now he seems healthy but we don't know what caused the deformity. We need to check him over and run some tests to make sure that he is really healthy." Jen's had been staring at the wall thinking about what she was going to do about her child.

"No!" She almost shouted. She could not take Erik out in public. She could only imagine what other people would think when they saw him. "No one can know about him. In fact it would be better if everyone thought he died." Dr. Glenn shook his head.

"Better for you or better for Erik. There could be something seriously wrong with him and we could not know it. He needs to get checked out." She shook her head forcefully.

"No. I will never bring him to a hospital. Look at him what do you think that other people will say about him." She tilted Erik so Dr. Glenn could see him. He knew exactly what would happen if people saw Erik.

"Jen," Dr. Glenn sighed. He knew he would not convince her. He knew there was no way to force her to do what was best. He knew if that child were brought into a hospital he would be treated like a science project. Doctors would want to find out what was wrong with him. The Doctor felt curiosity but pity as well. The boy was ugly and looked like something out of a horror movie. People would not want to be around him. He looked at Jen and nodded reluctantly. He knew he had to make a report but was indecisive about what exactly to write. He wasn't sure if writing a detailed report would be best in this situation.

"Fine, I will return to check on you in the morning. Remember what we talked about feed him at least eight times a day and don't forget to change him and get plenty of rest. You will get the hang of it. Take it easy the next few days" Jennifer waited until she heard the front door shut before getting up as quickly as she could and set Erik down in his crib. She turned away from him feeling overcome with emotion. She was disgusted by her child and disgusted with herself. What kind of mother was so repulsed by her child that she couldn't wait to put him down? She was just as much of a monster as he was. She did not know how she was going to raise her child with such conflicting emotions. She wanted to love him, he was her son. He was all that was left of the man she loved more than anything. Shouldn't mothers love their children no matter what? What kind of mother couldn't stand the sight of her child?

"Erik," she whispered turning to face the crib. Tears started falling from her face as she leaned over to use a hesitant finger to stroke his sunken cheek. She drew back with a gasp when her finger touched cold skin. She touched him again and his skin was cold and felt paper thin. She wondered if he would live long, half hoping that he wouldn't. Maybe he would die and she would not have to deal with a future with him. She felt a sharp pain in her chest as she frowned and tried to erase that thought from her head wondering if she was just not a good mother. Maybe she just didn't have that nurturing instinct inside her.

She was about to turn away to lay back down when Erik opened his eyes and she gasped. His eyes were black and she could see no white at all. She felt like his gaze was going right through her. It felt like she stood there forever as her child silently assessed her. She knew it was irrational but she felt like he knew what she thought about him and she saw a fire burning in his eyes and felt a chill as she felt the anger flow out of him. She shivered in fear and pulled her eyes away from his foreign gaze.

Going to her bed she lay down exhausted from the events of the night. It was late and she had not slept very well in days. She lay down on the clean bed and fell instantly into a deep sleep. She woke later to the angry screaming of her child. She stumbled out of the bed and steeled herself as she picked up Erik, pushing down the feelings of revulsion. She was careful not to make eye contact as he continued screaming in anger until she positioned him at her breast. She leaned back eyes closed and sighed as he suckled. It was not long before she had to switch him to the other breast. Once he was full she quickly laid him down in the crib knowing that she had to change him.

Quickly she gathered what she needed and changed him in what she thought was record time and fell quickly back to sleep as she lay in her bed. Several times before morning she was awakened to his angry cries. She took care of him as quickly as possible to shorten the time she had to be around him. By morning she was exhausted from lack of sleep and still recovering from giving birth. She sat at the table eating breakfast when Dr. Glenn knocked on the door.

She got up slowly to open the door and tried to smile at the doctor. Dr. Glenn saw the exhaustion in her face and knew that she had had a rough night. He stepped into the house and shut the door behind him.

"How are you doing?" He asked her gently and she shrugged.

"As well as can be expected I guess." She led the way upstairs to her bedroom. Dr. Glenn walked over the crib and looked down at Erik. Erik looked up at him with his unusual gaze and once again Dr. Glenn felt the gaze pierce him. He was shocked when the child smiled at him. A newborn should not have such a direct gaze or smile. He shoved that information to the back of him head and continued examining the child. He was glad that Jennifer was caring for the boy. He had decided that he did not want many people to know about Erik. He knew he should have Jennifer take Erik to a hospital to check him out completely, but he just could not bring himself to try and talk her into it. He had a suspicion that if anyone in the small city found out about the child superstitions would rise and the child would be labeled a freak or a monster. He did not want to turn Erik into a science project or a pariah. He would rather this child be kept a secret so it could have a life without all that kind of attention. He wanted this small family to be able to live as normal life as they could. He worried that he was making the wrong decision. He had filled out the paperwork as soon as he arrived in his office. He had brought all the paperwork Jen needed to fill out and he was unsure if she would fill it out.

Jen was silent as she watched Dr. Glenn work. She took a deep breath before speaking quietly.

"Doctor Glenn I don't know if I can do it." She said her voice tortured. She looked up at him tears in her eyes. How can I care for a child that I can barely stand to touch?" She asked desperately. Dr. Glenn felt for her and knew that what she was going through was not easy.

"You can do it Jen. Erik is your child and he needs you whether you want him or not. There are options if you don't want to keep him. You can put him up for adoption." She shook her head. She did not want to do that. No one would ever find out about Erik. Dr. Glenn sighed and she looked at him. "Jen I know deep down you love him, and I know that you are a good person and a good mom. You will take care of him because that is what good people and good mom's do."

"I don't know. What kind of mom am I really? What kind of mother can't stand to be around her child? Every time I touch him I get the heebie-jeebies? He disgusts me." Dr. Glenn put Erik down and walked over to her. He put his hands on her shoulders and looked her in the eyes.

"I know you can Jen. I know you will not let this child die. You are not as cruel as that." He replied forcefully, looking Jennifer in the face, reading her expression. He saw her struggle with her feelings and he hoped his argument would help in her decision to take care of Erik.

"No," she replied looking at her child. She got up and walked to the crib. "I can't just let him die. I'll take care of him. I gave birth to him and it is my duty to raise him." He looked at the earnestness in her face and sighed inwardly. He hoped the child would be able to grow up happy. He knew what happened to children who grew up without the affection they needed from their parents. He knew that leaving Erik with Jennifer was probably the best thing he could do for the boy. He was afraid what would happen if anyone found out about the child. He nodded to her and gave her a little more advice and left her alone with her child. She watched Erik as he lay in the crib looking around curiously.

"I will find a way." She whispered to him.

He looked up meeting her stare. She shuddered and looked away from his intense gaze. She felt his eyes burn into her as he watched her. She was afraid and wondered if taking care of him would be one of the biggest mistakes of her life. She quickly turned away from him and left the room to finish her breakfast.