A/N:
Disclaimer - I don't own Miraculous Ladybug or any of its affiliates. I'm not attempting to make money from posting this.
My first ML fic -rubs hands nervously-
It was an uneventful Friday night, and as the time rolled around to 03:00 early Saturday morning, Adrien woke to the sharp, default noise of his phone alarm and shut it up before his father, Nathalie, or one of the servants could hear; he knew through experience that some of them were light or unreliable sleepers, and he would definitely have a hard time finding an excuse to give them if he was caught by a phone alarm.
A few minutes later, he was Chat Noir, and he climbed out of the window, closing it silently behind him.
From then on, it was the comfortable routine of jumping rooftops and alleyways, soaring through the skies. The freedom of being Chat Noir was a far cry from the busy, often suffocating schedule of Adrien Agreste, and it was something he knew he would never get tired of.
Especially if it was always at his Lady's side. He smiled at the thought.
Chat Noir loved his job almost as much as he did Ladybug. He wouldn't know where he would be now without Plagg and his Miraculous. In bed, I guess. Certainly not crossing the final gap from a lamppost in the middle of a street to the usual meeting place with his Lady, as he was doing now, to finally relieve her from patrol for the night.
"Good evening, my dear Ladybug," he greeted cheerfully, landing beside her sitting figure on all fours. "Or should I say, good morning? The stars are almost as beautiful as you tonight."
"If only I was that bright, too, so I could blind those silly eyes of yours," Ladybug teased back.
She was smiling, but through the green tint of his night-vision, Chat Noir thought that her smile looked strangely weak. In fact, as he realized this, he thought that her voice might have been too tight, too small for her usual verbal ripostes. His suspicions were confirmed at the sound of her Miraculous's warning going off, which made Ladybug lose her smile entirely and look almost… frightened.
He tilted his head and sat back on his haunches, growing very concerned. At this point, he couldn't care less about her de-transformation. They still had five minutes. "Is something wrong, my Lady?"
"I…" She faltered, wringing her hands. Her face was tight with apprehension. "I should have said something before now. But I won't be here anymore. I'll be leaving tomorrow- today. Maybe for good."
Chat Noir's stomach dropped. "Leaving?"
"Yes." Ladybug couldn't look him in the eye and stared out at the deserted streets instead. "My parents, they… I honestly don't understand why. We're moving to Bordeaux."
"You're… leaving Paris." Chat Noir couldn't think. Adrien couldn't think.
His Lady was leaving?
"I'm sorry," Ladybug said through the sound of her Miraculous beeping another, more urgent alarm. Quickly, she turned to her partner and hugged him, shocking him even further with her display of affection. Her eyes were beginning to gleam with tears of fear. "I'm leaving you in Paris alone, and you can't purify akumas by yourself. I'm so sorry. But I can't leave my parents, I can't stay."
As if in a dream, Chat Noir put his arms around Ladybug in return.
His beloved partner was leaving him.
And he would have no way to stop the akumas.
"You need to go, my Lady," he finally whispered. "Your Miraculous is running out."
Ladybug squeezed him briefly before letting go. Tears had finally begun to trickle down her face. "I'm sorry," she said again, choked. "Please, please stay safe, kitty."
Chat Noir couldn't stop himself from reaching out a hand to brush the tears from her cheeks. Everything felt like a dull haze of shock. Where had the comfort of a normal night gone?
"Don't cry, my Ladybug," he said hoarsely. "It breaks my heart to see you cry."
This only tore a sob from out of her lungs, and Ladybug seemed to give up, leaning into his hand and weeping.
Chat Noir, suddenly feeling much more like his awkward civilian self, slowly brought his other arm around his partner's shoulders and pulled her into his embrace, gently placing his hands against her head and back. For the briefest moment, he sat there in terror that he'd done the wrong thing, but then the moment was broken as Ladybug continued to cry into his chest, and he tightened his hold on her, closing his eyes. Another warning from her Miraculous went off as if from a distance.
He'd never seen Ladybug like this before. He was so used to seeing her perfectly poised, being so confident even in the face of certain danger. But it added only an inch to the new, deep maw of uncertainty in the pit of his stomach.
Slowly, Ladybug's weeping died away, and she pulled her trembling self out of Chat Noir's arms after her earrings beeped again. "I'm sorry," she said, wiping her face and giving a very un-Ladylike snuffle, and stood up. She took a step back, away from him, hugging herself. "But my Miraculous–"
"I still don't know your real identity, Ladybug," Chat Noir said, very quietly. I still don't know who you really are.
"I- I'm sorry, Chat Noir."
"It's fine," he said softly, curling in on himself where he sat until he was resting his head atop his knees, his arms wrapped tightly around his legs, fake ears drooping and tail lying limp on the rooftop. There was only a strange, tired emptiness left inside of him now, and he felt as if he was in the middle of the deepest winter France had ever seen. "Only if you want to, my Lady," he finished in the barest whisper, feeling very distant and very small.
Ladybug hesitated before bending down and giving him a quick kiss on the top of his head. "Thank you," she whispered.
He didn't say anything when she first backed away, almost reluctantly, and then quickly swung away with her yo-yo.
—
The next two days passed by in a blur of stunning normality, entirely overlaid with exhaustion made almost manic by a sudden need for caffeine; all he remembered well were the sleepless nights as Chat Noir, having to cover both shifts now that Ladybug was gone. He refused to stop doing the patrols, and only patrolling for part of the night was automatically out of the question. It was all or nothing, and he went all in despite losing almost every chance of sleep as a result.
(If his father or Nathalie noticed anything amiss, they didn't speak to him about it.)
Over those nights, he'd come across several "mundane" crimes in progress and stopped them by himself, which made him feel marginally better about the situation. But the lack of any akumatized villains - as well the media's inevitable questions about Ladybug's disappearance - only worried Adrien more. How would he manage to fight Hawk Moth alone, with no ability to purify akumas? If he wasn't so certain that Ladybug's civilian persona was still a secret, he might have suspected foul play.
As it was, the freeing rooftops of Paris had suddenly become very, very lonely. Chat Noir was left to take care of the city alone, and the job was quickly proving to be a task too hard for him to handle.
Adrien walked into class Monday morning barely able to see straight from lack of sleep, managing through some sort of model's talent to look normal enough as he slipped into his seat. Adrien was also holding a large cup of coffee in his hand, which was luckily not completely unusual for him - except for the fact that it was already halfway empty, and then he chugged down a half of that in one go as soon as he set his bag down, nearly slumping in his seat.
Nino, who was already beside him (He wasn't waiting for me outside, Adrien realized. What time is it?), looked at his friend strangely. Adrien hid it decently, but Nino had the perceptive eyes of someone who knew him well.
"Sorry for saying this, dude, but you look like trash," Nino said quietly. "What happened to make you late?"
Adrien chuckled, setting his cup of coffee down and closing his eyes for a moment; they felt like an ache one size too large for his skull. "I had… a really busy weekend," he said, head bowing over the table slightly before he forced himself to sit back up straight. Don't fall asleep, don't fall asleep. His skin felt clammy with cold sweat. "I guess I need to fire my makeup people or something; they were supposed to make me not look like trash today."
Nino managed a smile, although the rest of his face was creased with worry. "Ha. Seriously though, you look like you're getting sick. Maybe you should get excused and go home. Call your dad - well, maybe not him. That one lady, Nathalie?"
For a moment, Adrien had seriously considered Nino's advice, but at the mention of his father, he immediately shook his head. "No," he replied, taking another sip of his coffee. "I think I'll be fine." The caffeine was starting to kick in; even if he physically felt terrible, at least he was more alert now.
Besides, he didn't want to attract any more attention to himself than he already was, and he doubted his father would care to be interrupted in the middle of work by his son, not for a reason as mundane as "a possible flu". Adrien Agreste wasn't supposed to be this exhausted or ill anyway; he wasn't supposed to be a run-down Chat Noir at his breaking point. He needed to keep these problems secret. He'd make things work out. Alone.
Without Ladybug.
Sighing, Adrien finished the last of his coffee, setting the cup down on the table, and attempted to listen to Ms. Mendeleiev as she talked about something to do with polar and non-polar charges. However, Adrien was quickly distracted by a vigorous poke in his right shoulder and, as he turned to give the offender a scowl, he spotted a note plopped onto the right end of the table.
He looked behind him with a severe frown of confusion and saw Alya scooting back into her seat. She glared at Adrien significantly, jabbing a finger towards the note, before quickly turning to face the front again; Ms. Mendeleiev was well-known for being merciless when it came to stopping classroom distractions.
Her friend that she shared the table with, Marinette, was strangely absent. Huh, Adrien puzzled. Is she out sick today?
He wasn't particularly close to her since she was almost always shy or stammering near him, but Adrien liked to think of Marinette as a good friend. He liked her a lot, too; she was one of the kindest people in the class, and her handling of every other situation besides being around him always reminded him of Ladybug, whose own confidence was one of the main reasons he loved her so much. (Honestly, the difference in behavior when it came to him made Adrien worry quite a lot that he intimidated Marinette somehow, which was why he tried to not approach her much.)Hopefully she'll be back tomorrow. Missing a bunch of class sucks.
Adrien turned back to face Ms. Mendeleiev again, ignoring Nino's blatant side glances of 'what the heck is going on, dude' as he slipped Alya's note into his hand. He moved it to his lap and slowly, carefully folded it open to minimize the rustling sound; the effort, in his uncoordinated state, was enough that by the time he'd gotten it completely unfolded, Adrien was anxious to know what it said.
I just want to let you know, Alya had written in magenta ink, Marinette has a really big crush on you. She moved to Bordeaux over the weekend and she didn't tell me to still keep it secret - you should know now anyway, it's pointless to not let you know since Marinette can't try to charm you anymore. (': Hopefully you don't mind she liked you. [I can give you her phone number btw if you're interested, I'm sure she'd still love to hear from you (; ]
Adrien stared down at the note for a moment, forgetting about listening to Ms. Mendeleiev. No way. It's… everything adds up, but it's a coincidence, right?
You have to know.
"Alya," Adrien hissed, sliding to the left and closer to Nino, where Alya sat behind him. "When did she leave?" he asked, looking back at her.
"When did who leave?" Nino asked in a similar, confused hush.
"Saturday," Alya hissed back.
Saturday. The same day as Ladybug, Adrien thought frantically as he scooted back to his seat, folding the note up and placing it in his bag. He thought he could hear Alya explaining it to Nino in quiet whispers. And to Bordeaux too.
Ladybug's about the same age as me for sure, and there was that one time with the history textbook from our class… and Marinette always reminded me of Ladybug a lot. But Ladybug never wanted us to know each other's secret identities. It was easy to ignore because I know she'd want me to, but now she's gone. I can't keep ignoring it.
And… she liked me back. As Marinette - to me, as Adrien. She liked me back.
Adrien stared blankly at the colorful paisley patterns on his empty coffee cup, having completely given up on paying attention to the lecture at this point. Thoughts were whirling at full-speed around in his brain like one large, confusing hurricane of conclusions and 'if-then's.
Even Ms. Mendeleiev halted when Adrien suddenly stood up.
"I have to go," he said hoarsely, and left the room with his bag before Ms. Mendeleiev could say much more than, "Now wait just a moment–"
Adrien hurried through the empty school hall, head ducked down, trying to stay calm as he felt himself begin to tremble. As soon as he reached the nearest boy's restroom, he went in, making sure that it was empty before dropping his bag on the floor and leaning his back against the entrance door, hardly caring when the back of his head smacked painfully against it. Adrien slowly, gradually slid down until he was sitting on the cold tile floor with his elbows resting against his thighs, holding his face in his hands.
It had taken him over two days, but finally, through cold, shaky hands, Adrien began to cry.
—
(bonus/epilogue:)
—
Adrien took a deep breath, anticipation thankfully chasing away the exhaustion from his body. "Father," he said, and he was relieved that his voice didn't shake, "I've done everything you've asked of me for my entire life. I've been your model even though I'd rather choose to be something else, I've gone to every event you've asked me to and never complained."
"And?" Gabriel Agreste interrupted, his face stern. The audio quality slightly distorted his voice as he spoke from the tablet screen. "Get on with it, boy."
Those words might have implied anger from any other person's mouth, but from Adrien's father, they were simply cold - absent of love or of any kind of affection that a father was supposed to have towards his child. That, in combination with the risk he was about to take, had Adrien struggling not to flinch. "So I- I think that if I deserve anything for always doing what you've asked, I deserve to ask you for one favor. And to have it granted."
"I'd already deduced that," Gabriel said flatly. "What is your request?"
Swallowing nervously, Adrien's eyes flickered up to Nathalie, who was holding up the tablet for her boss. She only offered him the slightest encouraging nod.
"There was a girl in my class who moved to Bordeaux recently," he started slowly. "Marinette Dupain-Cheng. You probably remember her, Father - from the derby hat design contest. She was the one who won."
"Ah, yes," Gabriel murmured.
Adrien hesitated. When no other comment seemed forthcoming, he continued. "My favor… I want her to return to Paris. You don't - well, if you could bring her parents back too, that would be great. But, Father, Marinette is really hoping to become a fashion designer when she's older; I've seen some of her designs myself and she has a lot of talent! If, maybe, she came back to Paris under the pretext that she would be learning from you, then–"
"Do you like this girl?"
Adrien froze, even though he heard nothing in his father's voice except for casual interest. "I- Well–" he stammered, not even sure what he was planning to respond.
"Enough." Gabriel shook his head. "The answer is clearly yes."
Hesitating again - and receiving nothing further - Adrien finally asked, "So, will you grant my request then? To bring her to Paris?"
Gabriel Agreste didn't speak for a moment. Eventually, he replied, "Perhaps. Understand, son, that I have a reputation to uphold. Other, much more qualified designers have asked for my patronage before and been turned away. If Miss Dupain-Cheng cannot meet the high standards that will be required of her, she will cast a very poor light on the judgement of our family. She will have to pass a test of my own design before I even think of granting your request."
"Of course, Father, thank you," Adrien said solemnly, struggling to keep the widest grin from appearing on his face. If it was any other person, he might have been frustrated by this result - he knew his father to be a very strict, very particular perfectionist - but Adrien was certain that Marinette could pass his test with flying colors. "Marinette won't disappoint you, I promise."
Gabriel raised an eyebrow at his son's conviction, but there was the faintest trace of amusement on his face. "I'm sure she would be relieved to know how confident you are in her," he said, and then ended the call.
Finally free to release his emotions, Adrien whooped out loud, beaming with relief. It was easily the happiest he'd ever been after a talk with his father, and even Nathalie's surprise could be clearly seen as the echo of his joy reverberated throughout the foyer.
Adrien just about skipped down the hall to his room, grinning madly, and as soon as he was out of sight from anyone else, Plagg flew out of his bag to float beside him. "You really think Ladybug can please that old man?" he asked.
"Of course! She's such an amazing designer for her age, Father will have to be impressed."
"If you say so." Plagg darted for the desk as they entered Adrien's room, where a plate of cheese was already waiting.
Adrien sighed happily, plopping down into his chair. He looked down at his bag, smiling, before taking out his phone and a slip of paper from it - Marinette's phone number, which Alya had given him after he'd finally returned to class. "I have to call her," he said. Not just to tell her about my talk with Father, he thought. But that… I know. That she's Ladybug.
"I wonder how she's going to react once she knows I'm Chat Noir," he said aloud, looking up at the ceiling.
Then he turned on his phone, staring it for a moment, before the brightness of his smile faded to something much more nervous again. Eventually, he took a deep breath and began to dial. Plagg twisted around from his cheese to watch curiously.
