Stolen Moment


They walked through the doorway, into her house, laughing as they brushed the melting snow off the tops of the other's head. Playfully, he touched his hand, frozen from the brisk winter air, to her flushed cheeks. She jumped and squealed at the unexpected cold, leaned forward and left a light punch on his shoulder. They looked at each other and grinned.

When he settled himself comfortably on her sofa in the living room, she held out a mug of hot chocolate to him; he glanced up at her and nodded a thanks as he gratefully took the hot drink from her hand. Carefully placing her own cup of hot chocolate on the coffee table, she plopped down on the seat next to him. He grinned and poked her sides. Her body gave a slight twitch. She turned to face him and held up her hands, smiling mischievously, and before he knew it, she was pelting him with tickles. While laughing, he shrank into a ball, trying to escape the flurry of tickles, but she didn't stop, not until he breathlessly pleaded for mercy.

Satisfied with her retaliation, she reached out and picked up her steaming mug of brown liquid and blew gently.

Lifting his cup to his lips, he took a small sip. They sat in silence.

He put down his cup, cleared his throat, and without looking at her, said, "So, umm...how have you been Meiling?"

Meiling knew why he was suddenly awkward. This was her moment. Her moment to shine - moment to smile and lie. She hated lying to him though - he was her cousin, but more importantly, he was her best friend. But she couldn't help it; this was better for the both of them, and as far as he knew, it could have very well been the truth. "Yeah, I'm good."

There was a pause, a moment of uncomfortable silence. The two of them stared down at their drinks, not knowing what to do or say.

The girl steeled herself for what she was about to say. She looked up from her cup and her gaze fell upon the bright fire blazing in the fireplace, washing the entire room in a smoky warmth. She tore her eyes away from the fire and stared unblinkingly at him. She bit back a sigh. She loved the way his chocolate brown hair fell over his warm hazel eyes. It looked so sweet. And she loved the way his lips always seemed as if they were on the verge of breaking into a smile. "I'm over you."

Instantly, his head snapped up and he met her gaze. He smiled. She returned it, albeit hers was a bit strained, a bit sad, but in the dim light of the fire, with the orange flames licking only half of her face, he couldn't see her sorrow. He couldn't see her ruby eyes, a bit brighter than normal. He couldn't see beneath her mask.

She didn't know when she started liking him, didn't know when her feelings for him started to change, to grow, to escalate into something beyond that of friendship, of kinship. All she knew was that, she started being possessive of him. She didn't like it when he talked to other girls, in fact, sometimes she would cut into their conversations, or she would walk away, sensing a deep resentment inside of her. At the time she suppressed that emotion, brushing it aside, ignoring it, but now, in retrospect, she realized that it was jealousy.

Scared. She remembered being scared. She cried. It wasn't supposed to be like this. He, Li Syaoran, the heir to the Li clan, was her cousin and her best friend. She couldn't like him. It just wasn't right. But Meiling couldn't help it. You just can't help how you feel. You can't tell your heart to stop loving, to stop caring. It's impossible, so in the end, she did what she had to do.

She knew, even before the words left her mouth, she knew. He cared about her in the way a friend does. He loved her, as a brother does a sister. He teased her and indulged her as a father does a daughter. Nothing he did, nothing he said ever so much as hinted at anything more. Oh, but the thin strand of hope was there. Hope, the most beautiful thing, and yet, the most painful. Hoping for something that was never meant to be. Waiting, unwaveringly, for something that just won't come.

Meiling ran away. Ran away even before he could respond to her words. To her feelings.

She avoided him for a while, but eventually, they talked it out, and they were friends again. Friends.

-----

Flashback

I saw. I knew. In class, he'd always look up from time to time, casting shy glances at her. To embed into his mind, her beauty, her radiance. After class, he'd always walk up to her, all nonchalant, to initiate conversation with her. Whenever she walked by, he would raise the volume of his voice, to try to get her attention. How childish. How lame. How...cute...and how...I wish I was her. But I also saw that he was confused. He wasn't entirely sure of his feelings for her.

I was jealous, I admit. The girl's name was Kinomoto Sakura. She was outgoing, friendly, cheerful, bright and bubbly. And she was pretty. She had these gorgeous emerald eyes, and her lips were pink and pouty and cute. And what do I have? Dull red eyes - like I'm constantly tired. Dull lips - no colour, no cuteness. No nothing. Sometimes, on impulse, I would challenge her, but she would always win those little challenges. She was talented. Better than me. No wonder Syaoran didn't like me.

I kept telling myself that at least Syaoran and I were friends, and that I'm happy with just that, and that even if we were to date, we'd end up breaking up. We'd no longer be friends. It only worked for a little while.

It was after school. I asked him to go for coffee with me and he agreed. Just as we were leaving the school, we bumped into her. "Hey." He murmured softly and smiled. It was a different smile from the ones he gave me, or anybody else. It was a shy smile, almost hesitant, scared. His warm brown eyes seemed to hug her, envelop them, and lurking behind those lens of his was a sort of wistful yearning. Yup. No doubt about it now. He liked her.

We walked in silence under the fading light of the afternoon sun. I stole a glance at him and I felt a smile tug at the corner of my lips. The golden rays of the sun spilled over his tanned face, illuminating his features. I stopped walking. He turned around and looked at me, puzzled.

"You like her don't you?"

Syaoran's eyes widened and he stared at me, bewildered. "Who?"

"Kinomoto."

He stared at me without saying anything. I stared back. Finally he broke and sighed. "Yeah. I think I kinda like her."

I replied without smiling, "I knew it."

I couldn't stop myself. The words just escaped from me. I tried running after them, grabbing them as they were slipping away, but it was no use. They were out. "SyaorangodfuckingdamIdon'tknowwhybutIlikeyou."

He blinked. Once. Twice. I felt my heart stop. He shook his head, "I'm sorry, Meiling, I didn't quite get that."

I took a deep breath, and oh god, oh god; I found myself doing something involuntarily. It's not my fault. I wish I could have stopped myself. But it was as if my body had a mind of its own.

My body moved me forward, closer to him. I pulled him towards me into a one-sided hug. He was too surprised, too confused to pull away. And, underneath the dying light, beneath the darkening sky, standing on tiptoes, I brushed my lips against his. It was an unreturned kiss, but it was a kiss nonetheless. It was my moment. The moment that I stole. The moment that wasn't supposed to be mine. That moment, I never felt so alone, so cold, so unwanted, unneeded. I. Love. Him.

He pushed me away and glowered at me. Anger radiating from every inch of his body. "What the fuck are you doing?"

Shit. He never swore at me before.

"Get the fuck away from me." He snarled.

Meek, timid, mute, I ran. And I cried.

End Flashback

-----

It wasn't worth it. Losing a friend for that one kiss.

But, eventually, he came to forgive me. Though, we aren't as close as we once were. I suppose there will always be that awkward barrier between us. At least we're still friends right?

"Hey, I should go home now." I pushed through the memories and surfaced into the present. I nodded and led him to the door. I waited until he put on his boots, then I opened the door.

"Bye!" I called out, waving as he waded through the snow. I closed the door.

That kiss, I'll cherish it and keep it safe, somewhere deep in the hidden reserves of my memories. I'll never forget that moment. Funny thing though, even after all this, I think I still love him. Or maybe it isn't love. Maybe it's just that little nagging feeling of wanting what you can't get. I don't know. But I do know one thing. He's the first to ever find the path to my heartstrings. Sad, isn't it?


A/N: Sorry for any OOCness. Please review. D