Call in confession
Marty Deeks is not a complicated man. He knows what he wants and he goes for it. But this time, it's different. He knows exactly what he wants, but something seems to be getting in his way. He can't remember exactly the last time he had felt like this for someone, might have been his first love. But there was just something about the way that she looked at him that made him wonder, what if.
He had just gotten home from a long day at work. He was sore from head to toe after tackling that 6ft 200lb guy that had come at them. He wouldn't admit it to any, especially her, that he was in that much pain. All he wanted to do was go home and relax in front of the TV with Monty by his side.
He came home to find Monty laying on the couch, listening to the talk radio station he had left on for him. He wasn't really paying much attention to the radio while he was in the kitchen. As he made his way towards the living room, something caught his attention.
"Hey everyone, this is Dr. D coming at you live from beautiful downtown Los Angeles. Today's topic, for those of you just joining us, we are talking about confessing your feelings for that person in your life that probably doesn't know how you feel about them. Our last caller had stated that she had an unrequited crush on her married co-worker that put her job in jeopardy. So callers, I ask you, would you sacrifice your job for an office romance? "
Deeks laughed it off. Really, sacrificing your job for an office romance. That's nuts. Its stupid. I don't think I could ever do anything like that. Or Could I? The more he thought about it, he wondered if he would sacrifice it for her. He loved the way he felt around her. Her smile, her sense of humor (or lack thereof). He loved spending time with her and he always wondered if she ever admitted out loud that she liked spending time with him.
He listened for about fifteen minutes before he decided to pick up the phone and call. It was late, and no one from the team listened to this show anyway. He was nervous when the phone started ringing on the other end. Talking about Kensi was easy, well at least that's what Ray used to say, this should be absolutely no problem at all.
"Caller, you are on the air." Oh shit, Deeks thought. What am I gonna say?
"Um, caller, are you there?"
Deeks cleared his thoat, "Uh, yeah, yeah I'm here."
"Welcome to the show, who am I speaking with?"
He looked at Monty and smiled, "This is Monty."
"So Monty, tell me. Would you sacrifice your job for an office romance?"
"I feel like I'm sacrificing a romance because of my job."
"How is that?"
Deeks sighed, felt a little foolish for saying this out loud to anyone but Ray. "My partner and I work in high stress situations. She's the first partner I've had in a long time. I feel as if I have to protect her from me sometimes."
"So Monty, how long ago did you realize that you had feelings for your partner?"
Deeks laughed. He can pinpoint the exact moment when he realized that he had fallen for her. It was the day she left for Hawaii. She wasn't gone long, only a couple of days, but it seemed like a lifetime when he was away from her.
"It was just recently. I'm afraid of losing her. I'm afraid she'll run if I tell her how I feel about her. I really think that we could be good together. She's...she is so beautiful. She has this air of confidence about her. I just, I can't describe it. When we are together, it feels as if no one else is around us. Its just us. I really don't remember the last time I felt like this. I really think that she could be it for me."
Dr. D remained speechless, she remembered the love that she had with her husband who had just recently passed away.
"Monty, may I offer you a piece of advice. We don't get to choose when people come into our lives. But once that person comes into your life, make sure they know exactly how you feel. Life is too short to not take a chance. You could be losing your chance at happiness."
"Thanks Dr. D."
Deeks thought long and hard after he had hung up with the talk show host. It was almost one in the morning when he finally fell asleep. His dreams were filled with his thoughts of Kensi, which was nothing new. But this time his dreams were different. They were happy, they were together. In his dream he could see her walking down the aisle towards him. The smile on his face couldn't be matched with hers. Could this be a foretelling of a future to come or a dream that would never come true? He knew he had to ease into this "thing" with Kensi. Things would work out for the best. He just hoped that she felt the same for him.
