When Kuroko plus booze equals to the horrifying prospect of a ridiculously childish shadow.
WRITTEN FOR AKAKURO DAY!
Please note that there is only HINTED AkaKuro here. Whether they get together and start dating in the end is entire up to your imagination XD
Disclaimer: We own nothing.
Warning: Kise's horrible abuse of alcohol, pure stupidity, Yandere-ness (a whole lot of 'I wanna slice out your heart'), abuse of scissors, massacre of soft toys. Not for the faint-hearted. Read at your own risk. It can be considered humour. We don't know.
[See end of work for 'notes'. Please note the use of inverted commas. 'Notes'.]
It was about 8pm at night. The whole school was empty and dark, except for the locker room, which held a red-haired captain and a terrified blonde.
"I'm sorry. I didn't quite hear what you said." Akashi's steely voice echoed through the locker room, promising a gruesome murder in a thousand different methods. Kise stared at Akashi in fear, shaking as he found himself looking into a pair of murderous eyes, before breaking down and confessing his sins.
"I DIDN'T MEAN TO PEEK AT MOMOICCHI LAST TIME! I'M SORRY FOR EATING MURASAKIBARACCHI'S CHOCOLATE! I DIDN'T MEAN TO BREAK YOUR SCISSORS! I WASN'T THE ONE WHO THREW MIDORIMACCHI'S LUCKY ITEM OUT OF THE WINDOW!"
"Back to the topic," Akashi interrupted, glaring at Kise. "What did you do with Tetsuya again?"
"IMSORRYIMSORRYIMSORRYIMSORRYIMSOSOVERYSORRY" A very terrified Kise wailed.
"You let Tetsuya drink, am I right?" Akashi pointed at a very drunken Kuroko, who was sitting on the ground at the side. He was giggling in a very insane and unlike-himself manner. Also, he was holding Akashi's scissors in a way that a scissors should never be held in, and brandishing it around dangerously.
"IMSORRYIMSORRYIMSORRYIMSORRY-" Kise wailed again, breaking down into tears.
Akashi sighed.
"I would punish you for what you have done, but the main priority here is taking care of Tetsuya. Therefore, I shall let you go for now. I would appreciate it if you'd kindly leave." Akashi ordered.
"REALLY?! THANK YOU AKASHICCHI! I'M SORRY I EVER ANGERED YOU! I'LL BE LEAVING NOW!" Kise squealed, and sprinted off.
The moment Kise dashed out of the locker room and the door flew shut, Akashi turned towards Kuroko. Kuroko looked up at Akashi and laughed hysterically, lunging for Akashi's legs and hugging them tightly.
"Heheheheheh... Akashi-kyun~" Kuroko giggled.
"After all this, I'll make sure to kill Ryouta..." Akashi muttered.
Looking down at Kuroko, he said, "Tetsuya, please let go."
"Eheheheheh... Akashi-kyun has sexy legs..." Kuroko marvelled, stroking Akashi's legs affectionately.
Immediately, Akashi's cheeks turned as red as his own hair. That was the strangest thing that had ever come out of Kuroko's mouth, ever...
"S-stop it, Tetsuya." He tried to gently push Kuroko off with his legs, but Kuroko refused to let go or stop stroking his legs.
Akashi sighed again.
For what he could do with Tetsuya, he had a few options. Leaving him in the locker room was not an option. Leaving him with one of the Miracles? Well, the only one he could trust to take good care of Tetsuya was Daiki, and he wasn't going to let that happen because, well, Tetsuya belonged to him only, and his love was absolute. Bringing him home? Well, it was a somewhat acceptable option, if only he knew where Tetsuya lived. Actually, he could just ask Tetsuya... But no. He wanted to take care of Tetsuya.
So it was decided. He was bringing Tetsuya home with him.
Akashi suddenly snapped out of his thoughts as he was suddenly aware of the sound of his scissors snipping away. He looked down to see Kuroko, snipping away at his trousers. While the right side of his trousers remained intact, the left side had been cut to shreds.
"Ugh, Tetsuya... Kindly return my scissors now." Akashi reached for his scissors.
"Ehehehe. No." Kuroko stuck out his tongue, holding the scissors just out of Akashi's reach.
"Well then, at least let go of me."
Contrary to what Akashi said, Kuroko clung on to his leg even harder than before.
"Tetsuya-"
"Akashi-kyun's leg is so smooth..." Kuroko purred, rubbing his hand against Akashi's left leg.
"I have to do this the hard way, don't I?" Akashi muttered.
Akashi bent down and picked Kuroko up, pulling Kuroko off his leg. He then proceeded to carry Kuroko bridal style. Kuroko squealed in delight as he was lifted off the ground and then found himself in Akashi's muscular arms.
He's light...
"Heheheh! Akashi-kyun is carrying me~"
"This will be the first and the last time I'm doing this..."
As Akashi brought Kuroko out of the locker room, Kuroko tugged at Akashi's collar. Akashi looked down at Kuroko. "Yes?"
"Where are we going?"
"My place. I'll put you to bed and take care of you."
"You and I are going to do something fun?" Kuroko said, giggling like a madman.
"No. I am going to put you to bed so you can SLEEP."
"Put me to bed with you?" Kuroko said in a sultry manner.
"Put you to bed so you can sleep ON YOUR OWN."
Kuroko pouted, but spoke nothing more about going to bed. He continued playing with Akashi's scissors, waving it around and staring at it like it was some kind of unique ethereal object. Akashi sighed.
This was going to be a long night...
On the way to Akashi's home, Kuroko began talking again. He began talking about something he would never, ever expect Kuroko to say.
"Hey, Akashi-kyun," Kuroko purred. "Have I ever told you that I love you?"
"W-what?" Akashi spluttered. Even for someone as calm and cool-headed as him, this came as a huge surprise.
"Yeah, I love you a lot. Even more than Aomine-kun and Kise-kun. I love you the most, Akashi-kyun." Kuroko slurred.
Well. Since Kuroko hardly ever revealed his emotions, this would be a really good chance to find out Kuroko's feelings.
"Okay... Tell me more." Akashi said.
"I love you so much, I would die for you, you know. I would kill anyone for you, even myself. I would even kill you so you would be with me. That's how much I love you, Akashi-kyun. But you never once told me that you love me..."
Well. It's not like you ever told me you love me. Not until now, anyway.
"Has someone else stolen you heart? No! I won't let that happen! I'll cut out your heart, so I can keep your heart with me forever~" Kuroko pointed the scissors at Akashi's chest, giggling insanely.
Oh gosh...
"Tetsuya. Don't think about stabbing me."
"Why not?" Akashi felt the tip of the scissors on his chest. "Your heart can't go to anyone else..."
Akashi looked at Kuroko unbelievingly. Was Kuroko really going to cut out his heart? This was so... Unlike him. Well, Akashi wasn't prepared to die yet, so as embarrassing as it is, he had to say this to save himself.
"I won't let that happen. My heart is yours, and yours only."
My poor reputation...
"Ehehehehehe! I love you, Akashi~" Without any warning, Kuroko planted a kiss on Akashi's lips.
Akashi had no idea if this was considered hell or heaven.
Murasakibara really couldn't have picked a better time to be strolling on the streets. Really. He just had to walk past Akashi at this time of the night, with him carrying a very drunk Kuroko bridal style. Why was he even strolling at NIGHT? Fortunately, Kuroko was quiet now, and not babbling about killing Akashi for love.
"Woah. That looks cute." Murasakibara chirped, stuffing yet another maiubo into his mouth.
Akashi's face turned red again. "If you tell anyone about this I will kill you, Atsushi."
Murasakibara fished out his phone from his pocket.
"Don't worry, I'll keep this to myself," he said, snapping a photo of that beautiful moment.
Dammit...
"I'll kill you next practice when Tetsuya is sane..." He threatened.
"Alright. Bye, Aka-chin."
"Don't you dare send that to anyone..." Akashi warned as Murasakibara waved and walked off.
Just great. Now he was stuck with a drunk Kuroko and a Murasakibara with his embarrassing picture. All thanks to Kise and his alcohol influence. Akashi made a mental note to kill Kise twice as hard as he would kill Murasakibara.
Oh well. At least Kuroko was silent...
Finally, Akashi reached his house. Akashi went over to his closet and took out clothes for Kuroko and himself. Tossing his clothes to Kuroko, Akashi said, "Change."
"Nope."
"Why?"
"I want Akashi-kyun to change for me~"
"I refuse."
"Butbutbut I want Akashi to-" Kuroko wailed, bursting into sudden tears. "AKASHI-KYUUUUNNN!"
"Alright! Stop crying. I'll change for you!" Akashi surrendered.
"Yaay!" Kuroko squealed as Akashi went over to him.
By the time Akashi had gotten Kuroko changed, he was blushing. He picked up his own clothes and headed for the bathroom, then stopped and turned to Kuroko.
"Alright. I'm going to the bathroom to change. Tetsuya, stay here." Akashi said, walking to the bathroom with his clothes.
"No!" Kuroko leapt over and leeched on to Akashi's legs, refusing to let go. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"What now?" Akashi said, exasperated.
"Stay here with me, Akashi-kyun."
"I have to change, Tetsuya."
"Then change here! I don't mind seeing your body."
"I mind." Akashi finished impatiently.
"But Akashi-kyuuuuuuunn," Kuroko whined.
"No. Now let go of me."
"No! Not until you agree to stay here."
Akashi sighed. "Alright."
And by the time he was done changing his clothes in front of Kuroko, or displaying his very amazing body, depending on whose perspective you looked at, he was blushing even more. He carried Kuroko bridal style once more, causing the shadow to squeal as he found himself lifted off the ground.
Akashi headed for his bedroom and gently put Kuroko down on his bed. He looked at the drunk. Kuroko was clutching Akashi's scissors with both hands, but doesn't seem to want to kill Akashi or anything, which was good. Originally, he was going to let Kuroko sleep on the bed himself while he sleep on the couch. But all that changed, thanks to a certain Ahomine.
Akashi's phone, which he had left in the living room, rang.
"Stay there for a bit, Tetsuya. I'll be back soon."
Akashi went out to his living room and looked at the caller ID.
"Daiki, huh..."
He answered the phone. "Yes, Daiki?"
"Hey. I heard that you're taking care of Tetsu."
"Indeed. Tetsuya is at my house right now. Who told you that?"
"Kise. He came crying to me about how he nearly got killed by you, and then told me everything."
Kill Kise three times as much as Murasakibara now.
"Take care of Tetsu properly. He's my shadow and... Just take care of him well."
Your shadow and what, hmm? Your love? Well too bad for you, Tetsuya just proclaimed his love for me.
"Of course."
"Alright, bye."
"See you tomorrow."
Akashi hung up and put the phone down. He walked back into his room...
...and how he wished he never left Kuroko in his room alone.
Kuroko had stabbed his bed, pillow, and his most precious soft toys with his scissors like a million times. His pillow had been reduced to feathers flying around the room. Whatever remained of his bed was pieces of fabric, cotton and a wooden frame. Worst of all, his most precious soft toys had been brutally massacred, cotton spilling out of their pitiful, broken bodies.
"Tetsuya... My precious soft toys..."
"I know the toys are dear to your heart, Akashi-kyun," Kuroko said, smiling like a lunatic. "Which is why I destroyed them! Your heart can only belong to me."
"Then why did you destroy my bed and my pillow?"
"It seemed fun! And it was!"
If Daiki hadn't called me...
He made a mental note again, this time to kill Aomine, Murasakibara and Kise. Kise three times as much.
"Now I only have the couch..." Akashi muttered to himself.
"Yay! Now I can sleep on the couch with Akashi-kyun!"
"Nope. You're sleeping on the couch alone. I'll sleep on the floor."
"Akashi-kyun is willing to sacrifice that much for me!" Kuroko squealed.
"Fine, you can view it that way..."
Silence. Akashi looked at Kuroko. Kuroko looked back at him. Silence.
"Well, go on... You can walk to the couch on your own."
Kuroko shook his head.
"Why?"
"I want Akashi-kyun to carry me!"
Akashi swore he had enough of carrying Kuroko. Enough. But Kuroko wasn't prepared to move his drunken ass anytime soon, and Akashi wasn't prepared to sleep if Kuroko didn't sleep first. But he didn't want to carry Kuroko. But if he didn't...
"I am going to kill you once you have regained your senses." Akashi walked over to Kuroko, turned his back to him and bent down.
"Nuh-uh! I don't want a piggy-back! I want Akashi-kyun to carry me like a bride!"
"Didn't we have enough of that?"
"I want more, Akashi-kyun..." Kuroko whined.
"Fine." Akashi turned back to Kuroko and picked him up bridal style. It was probably a good thing he did, because Kuroko unconsciously dropped his scissors, promising no more, if not, less damage to Akashi belongings. Akashi brought Kuroko to the living room and placed him down on the couch.
Akashi's phone suddenly rang again. Groaning, he went over to his phone and looked at the Caller ID.
"Shintarou..." He muttered, "What is it?"
"Congratulations." the green-head told him shortly. "Murasakibara and I are very pleased with your relationship progression."
Akashi nearly dropped the phone. "Pardon?"
"It certainly is a pleasant surprise to know that you have found the one you're destined to be with. After all, Aquarians and Sagittarians make a creative and unique couple, nanodayo."
"I do not understand what you're saying."
"That adorable photo is sufficient proof."
Atsushi is doomed to hell.
Wait...
"Shintarou."
"Yes?"
"You find that photo adorable."
"Yes. I fail to see why that matters."
"Are you... A secret fudanshi?"
"What?! No! You're insane? Me, Midorima Shintarou, a fudanshi? No! That is absurd! Impossible!"
"Right. Don't you dare send that to anybody else, Shintarou, or your fate will be that of Atsushi's."
"I see. Goodbye."
Akashi hung up the phone and heaved a sigh as whatever that was left of his tattered dignity went down the drain. He placed the phone down and went back to Kuroko.
He laid down on the floor beside the couch.
"Close your eyes and sleep now, Tetsuya."
"Don't wanna~" came the flippant reply.
"Why not?" Akashi demanded.
"I want Akashi-kyun to gimme a goodnight kiss first."
Akashi backtracked hastily with a flustered, "I refuse."
"I won't sleep until I get my goodnight kiss, you know." the blue head interrupted cheekily.
Akashi sat up and looked at the blue-haired male. Kuroko look backed at him, his eyes begging for that goodnight kiss. Akashi sighed. He knew that there was no way around this. He leant over and planted his lips on Kuroko's.
Blushing, he pulled away and looked at Kuroko.
"Go to sleep now Tetsuya."
"Alright!" Kuroko grinned, and closed his eyes.
Akashi laid down beside the couch and stared at the ceiling, until Kuroko's slow breathing eventually turned into soft, adorable little snores, indicating the shadow was asleep. Heaving a deep sigh of relief, Akashi closed his eyes and gradually fell asleep.
Akashi woke up with a start. Something wasn't right. Groaning, he tried to sit up, but he couldn't. There was a heavy weight on his body, pressing him down. He squirmed around, trying to see amidst the dark, but realised that there was something hairy on his face. He groped around trying to figure out what it was, and his fingers wrapped around a mop of blue hair.
It then hit Akashi that Kuroko had fallen off his couch and was on top of him.
Dammit.
Akashi gently pushed Kuroko's head such that it rested on Akashi's right shoulder. With Kuroko's hair out of his sight, Akashi looked around. Kuroko was indeed resting on top of him, his hands tightly gripping Akashi's shirt. Akashi tried to push Kuroko off of him, but Kuroko held on to his shirt, refusing to move.
He was suddenly aware that his shoulder was starting to get wet. Akashi turned his head to the side to see Kuroko drooling all over his shoulder.
"Tetsuya," Akashi called, but the shadow continued sleeping.
Akashi swatted Kuroko on the head lightly, but the shadow didn't even twitch.
Unfortunately for Akashi, Kuroko slept like a rock. No matter what Akashi did, Kuroko had absolutely no reaction.
He had no choice. With Kuroko still on top of him, Akashi closed his eyes and went back to sleep.
Kuroko opened his eyes and found himself lying face down. As he pushed himself up, his head started pounding and he groaned, clutching his head. Looking around, he realised he was in an unfamiliar living room. And he had been lying on the floor. Wait...
Kuroko looked down and found himself sitting on a sleeping Akashi.
"A-Akashi-kun..." Kuroko stammered, blushing.
At the sound of his name being called by a shadowy voice, Akashi's eyes fluttered open for him to see a Kuroko sitting on him and looking down at him.
"What-"
He recalled what happened last night.
"-oh."
"Good morning, Akashi-kun," Kuroko said with a slight tinge of red on his cheeks.
"G-Good morning, Tetsuya." He replied, blushing as well.
"Why am I sleeping on top of you?"
"That doesn't really matter..." Akashi said, as Kuroko slowly crawled off of Akashi and sat on the floor beside him.
As Akashi sat up, he realised that Kuroko was breathing heavily and was quite pale. He placed his hand on Kuroko's forehead, but it felt of normal temperature. He then recalled the real reason why Kuroko was at his house. Hangover, of course.
"Can you stand, Tetsuya?"
Kuroko tried to push himself up, but the constant pounding in his head turned into pain, causing him to fall onto the ground, clutching his head and gasping. The world around him started to spin around, and it was all Kuroko could do to keep from blacking out.
"Tetsuya! Are you okay?" Amidst the ringing in his head, he heard Akashi calling out to him.
Kuroko opened his mouth to reply, but he suddenly felt warm bile rising up his throat at a fast rate. He bent over and pressed his mouth over his hand, trying to stop the bile from coming out. Coughing violently, he could feel the bile threatening to seep out through his fingers, and he placed his other hand over it and squeezed his eyes shut.
Akashi immediately ran over to get the trash can and passed it to Kuroko.
"Relax, Tetsuya. Let it all come out." Akashi coaxed.
Kuroko gripped the trash can with both hands as he had a second taste of the alcohol he drank yesterday, leaving a searing pain in his throat. Akashi rubbed Kuroko's back, at a loss of what to do to help ease his pain. There was nothing left in Kuroko's stomach, but he couldn't stop retching and coughing violently. His stomach was churning, his head pounding, and his throat felt like it was on fire. He let go of the trash can, gasping and shaking.
"I-it hurts, Akashi-kun!" Kuroko cried.
"It's fine." Akashi assured, his whirling thoughts unbetrayed by his steady voice. "You'll be fine."
When Kuroko's sharp and uneven breathing slowed to a steady pace, Akashi put his arms firmly around Kuroko's waist and hoisted him up.
"Akashi-kun..." he coughed, "What are you—"
A light blush on his face, Akashi gently put Kuroko down on the couch. Kuroko let out a heavy sigh as he gently rubbed his temple, trying to ease the headache as much as possible. Akashi walked off to the kitchen and came back later with a cup of tea. Handing the cup to Kuroko, he said, "Drink up. Careful, it's hot."
"Thank you, Akashi-kun." Kuroko carefully took the cup and put it to his mouth, sipping carefully until he had finished the drink. As he returned the empty cup to Akashi, he asked, "W-what happened? Why am I at your house?"
Akashi sighed.
"For unknown reasons, Ryouta gave you alcohol and you became drunk. You started playing with my scissors and slicing my pants up. I had to take care of you. I couldn't leave you in the locker room, so I brought you to my house." As Akashi said that, his face started growing slightly red.
"W-what?"
"Yes, it is true."
"W-what else did I do?"
Akashi blushed even harder.
"You started proclaiming your love for me when I carried you home. You also sliced up my bed, pillows and my soft toys. You asked me to change your clothes for you, and you made me change in front of you as well." Kuroko found his face turning red as Akashi told him what had happened.
"But that's not important now. What's important is that you are having a hangover that needs to be taken care off. Lie down." Akashi said as he walked off to somewhere.
Kuroko followed his captain's orders and laid down on the couch. Staring up at the ceiling, he thought about what he had said to Akashi in his drunken state. Did he really love Akashi like what he had said? He thought about the countless times he glanced over to Akashi during practice. He thought about how he got jealous when Midorima played shogi with Akashi during their captain's meeting, during their free time.
Akashi returned with a blanket and covered Kuroko with it.
"You should probably sleep. The hangover will be gone faster." Akashi said.
Kuroko nodded as he closed his eyes.
Akashi turned around and walked to his bedroom, then stopped in his tracks. He turned around and walked back to Kuroko. Bending down, he planted a .soft kiss on Kuroko's forehead. Kuroko opened his eyes in surprise.
"Have a good sleep, Tetsuya." Akashi said, smiling.
Kuroko smiled back at Akashi. "Thank you, Akashi-kun."
As he was about to head back to his room, his phone beeped. He picked it up. A message from Shintarou. He looked at it. Just the daily lucky items for the day...
His phone rang.
"Satsuki. That's a surprise." Momoi rarely called him.
Picking up the phone, he said, "Yes?"
"THAT PHOTO! THAT PHOTO WAS AMAZING! DID YOU TAKE ANY MORE?! SEND IT TO ME!"
"I beg your pardon?"
"YOU AND TETSU-KUUUUN!"
"Who. Who sent you that photo?"
He suddenly remembered the message that Shintarou sent. The lucky item for Taurus's today is a cute hinted-yaoi photo.
Oh.
Akashi came to the living room for the tenth time in half an hour to check on Kuroko. Kuroko was sleeping soundly. Good.
Suddenly, for the umpteenth time, his phone rang again. Why is it that no one seemed to be able to leave him alone today? Akashi went over and saw the Caller ID.
"Ryouta." Heaving a heavy sigh, Akashi answered the phone. "What is it this time?"
"AKASHICCHI! I'M REALLY SORRY TO BOTHER YOU AGAIN, BUT ALL I DID WAS GIVE AOMINECCHI A TEENY WEENY INTSY BITSY SIP OF BOOZE AND NOW HE'S TAKEN MY KNIFE AND IS ACTING ALL WEIRD!"
"..."
[Omake]
It was just another day of training for the Generation of Miracles. Well, not really. Aomine was at home being drunk, with Momoi watching over him as her punishment. Kuroko was sitting out of practice because he'd just recovered from his hangover. Worse of all, their captain was fuming.
Kise, Murasakibara and Midorima knelt down in front of Akashi, shivering, with the captain glaring down at them in a terrifying manner.
"Shintarou. One thousand push ups now." Akashi ordered.
"O-one thousand!?"
"Yes. Or would you rather two thousand?"
"No no no no no, one thousand is fine!" Midorima went into push-up position and began his punishment.
"Atsushi."
"Y-yes?" Murasakibara looked up at Akashi, fear written all over his face.
"Five hundred rounds around the school. Also no more tidbits for you for one week."
"N-no tidbits?!" He whined.
"Yes. Now go. Five hundred rounds, no stopping."
Obliged, he reluctantly went off to complete his punishment.
"Ryouta."
"Y-yes, Akashichii?"
"One hundred rounds around town. No stopping to rest."
"AROUND TOWN?!"
"Would you rather around the country?"
"NONONONONO AKASHICHII! THE TOWN IS FINE!"
"Good. Now go."
Whimpering, the blonde went off to his hell.
fin.
Well. That was fun. Sort of.
Anyway, happy AkaKuro Day to all them AkaKuro shippers out there in this vast world. XD
Written by me (Dei, if you haven't noticed the bold) and Akira. More than half by Akira, I think. Heheh...
Beta'd by me.
Posted also by me, because Akira is at home doing who knows what. :)
Reviews are highly appreciated ^^
