Fang, Iggy and Max go to Hogwarts
A Maximum Ride/Harry Potter fan fiction
By: Cora
The darkness covered me just like I liked it to. No one can see me, just me being able to get lost in my thoughts. I brushed my black hair a little out of my eyes. The lights came on, they were back.
"AAAHHH! It burns!" I said covering my eyes. "Fang! Why didn't you come with us?" it was Nudge she was holding a basket of berries. "I hate it out there…" I got up "Where's Iggy and Max?" I looked around neither where here "They're coming they where right behind us…" Nudge trailed off into the tale of their time outside.
Ah, here they are. "Maxi-kins! Wait up!" Iggy came running in behind Max. "I can't help it if I'm faster than you Iggy-kins!" she called back. Then they began making-out, again. "Will you two get a room?" I said going to the kitchen.
"Aw you're just jealous!" Iggy giggled as Max tickled him. I gagged; sure I was happy that Max finally got it in her tiny brain that I DON'T LOVE HER! But still would you want to watch the two making-out 24/7?
Part 2
"Come time to go." I said motioning to Gazzy to come. "Yes sir! I'll go get the boom sticks!" Gazzy ran to his room. We needed money; badly. Gazzy and I thought of ways to get it. I came up with the idea; we are going to go rob a bank. We didn't tell anyone our plans, just that we were going on a flight.
"If you're going flying why would you need bombs?" Iggy asked, I didn't answer I waited for Gazzy to come down. He might be annoying and smelly, but hey he can make some powerful bombs. "Ready to go sir!" he said handing me my black hoody; which I put on. Gazzy was dressed in a Black T-shirt and jeans, "Lets go." We unfolded our wings and away we went.
We flew to the nearest 'big city' we landed on the bank's roof. "LET'S GO BLOW UP SOME PEOPLE!!!!" Gazzy yelled in my ear; he was about to jump through the sky light but I stopped him. "Not yet." I lifted up my shirt. In my belt I had four hand guns I choose two of them.
"Bomb?" I asked Gazzy he gave me one. I set in up on the sky light it was a small bomb, only able to blow a hole in the sky light. It went off with a bang. People ran out I smiled. "Let's go." Gazzy and I flew in "STICK THEM UP AND HAND THE MONEY TO THE SHORT KID! OR WE BLOW UP THE CITY!" I screamed pointing my guns in two different directions. Gazzy was holding the backpack for the money; strapped to his waist were all of his bombs and he told me there are more in his pants.
The people threw the money in, Gazzy laughed like a manic. He was enjoying this and who wouldn't? I laughed a little my self as a woman tried running by with arms full of cash. I shot her and she died.
"FANG! WHAT THE HECK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!?" Max screamed she was running in Iggy, Angel and Nudge behind her. "Providing for you women!" I laughed wow that sounded really err Pimpish. "!" It was Gazzy. "Yo?" I said so he knew that I was listening.
"Iggy took all My Boom sticks and gave them to Nudge!" He cried "oh and the police are here." He said worriedly "See what you did now!" Max yelled "They took Angel and Nudge!" Iggy screamed.
Sigh, do I have to do everything! I through a bomb at the police holding Angel and Nudge; "There now we don't have to worry about them!" I laughed watching their bodies' burn. Gazzy grabbed my arm and we began flying away Max and Iggy fallowed.
"H-how could you!?" Max screamed at me "They were annoying anyways." I said calmly Gazzy was laughing next to me "Killing people is Fun!" he cried happily.
Part 3
Max and Iggy glared at us sitting across from them counting our money. "…woah we got 12,347 moneys!" Gazzy squeaked "and that's only part of it! We together can become America's most wanted!" I said. "YEAH!!! I WANT AMERICA TO HATE ME!!!" I laughed as Gazzy said that; Max tired to say something but broke down it tears Iggy tried to comfort her. I shrugged and packed up our money.
"What's next!?" Gazzy yelled "hmm…" I had my plans but I would release them to Gazzy later. Right now I had to perfect them, "Gazzy, the best thing you can do now is go get some sleep."
I went to my room and got some sleep. The next morning Max still wouldn't talk to me neither would Iggy, whatever they should be happy that I got us some money. But oh I killed Angel and Nudge well you know what? I really don't care. They needed to die.
"I am a Criminal I am a criminal oh yeah!" Gazzy came down singing I smiled at least I had him on my side. "You know what we should go do now?" Gazzy jumped on the table spilling my breakfast.
"What?" I asked "Go Rob a Zoo!!! I want a pet Zebra!" He shouted "Maybe later right now we have other plans to get to…"
Part 4
My plan is to take over the world.
That may sound like a pretty big job but I feel that with Gazzy by my side I can do it. I wouldn't tell him now let him think that we are only going to be America's most wanted.
Max and Iggy still wouldn't talk to me, whatever I'm going to kill them later anyways. "FAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGG YOU GOT MAIL!!!" Gazzy screamed as he ran to me, and handed me the letter. The letter was thick and printed in emerald green ink; I opened it and began to read it said:
We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
Students shall be required to report to the Chamber of Reception upon arrival, the date for which shall be duly advised.
Please ensure that the utmost attention be made to the list of requirements attached herewith.
We very much look forward to receiving you as a part of the new generation of Hogwarts' heritage.
Professor McGonagall
I read the supply list "Well it looks as if I'm going to go learn magic!" I read about this school on the internet it's a very secret school for people of 'magic'. Max came in with Iggy both holding letters "You got one to?" Max asked "Yup, should we go?" I answered I sort of wanted to go, the magic would help me take over the world and all. "Aw I didn't get one!" Gazzy complained.
"Well you're too young." Max said to him which just made him cry even more "Gazzy, you get to take care of the house well we're gone how's that?" Iggy put his hand on his shoulder which made Gazzy calm down "yeah ok. Come back for Christmas through."
Part 5
We left for Hogwarts the next day. First we flow to England then got the supplies; robes, wands, books, I got an owl etc. After that we got a motel to sleep the night. Tomorrow we would be leaving for Hogwarts.
"Why?" Max asked me Iggy had gone to get us something to drink leaving Max and I alone. "Why, what?" I asked not meeting her gaze "Why did you kill Angel and Nudge?" I laughed a little "I don't know. But hey you don't have to worry about them any more." I said Max slapped me across the face, hard.
Iggy came back with our drinks; something called Butter Beer. It was good I guess. After that we went to our rooms. I sat up awake for awhile what would this school be like? I patted my Owl on the head he was black with yellow eyes I decided to call him; Stygian.
The next day we had to run to the train station we were running late. "HURRY UP CRIPLE WE DON'T HAVE ALL DAY!" I yelled to Iggy. We couldn't find the right train we asked around and people just laugh when we said "Station 9 and 3/4." But we finally found another kid going to Hogwarts his name was Ron and he was with another kid called Harry, they helped us on Iggy and Max went to go sit with them. I on the other hand wondered the train and finally decided to sit down I found an empty seat or somewhat empty.
"Err… Mind if I sit here?" I asked the boy sitting there he looked lonely "Sure mate go ahead." He said a little nervously "I'm Fang and you are…" "Neville." He answered Neville and I became friends on that ride up there we didn't stop talking not until we had to be sorted.
"Longbottom, Neville!" The scary lady called "wish me luck mate!" Neville tripped on his way up the hat was put on him "GRYFFINDOR!!!" it yelled and Neville ran to that table we went through a few people. Max was placed in Gryffindor and Iggy In Ravenclaw then it was my turn.
Part 6
"Fang!" I don't have a last name; I went up there and the hat was placed upon my head "hmm… very angry indeed" the hat said "maybe Hufflepuff? Slytherin? Hmm no…" Then the Hat called out "Gryffindor!" everyone clapped and I sat down next to Neville.
Max didn't look happy that we where put in the same house. Why wouldn't she? I killed her baby, and enjoyed it. We went to our rooms they where amazing. "Your Classes Began at 9 a.m. sharp tomorrow and Breakfast is from 6-9 a.m. enjoy your year at Hogwarts!" the weird guy said walking out. All of us new students started talking too excited to sleep, "I can't believe we're in the same house!" Max had found me "I can't decide what house I'll be put in!" Max slapped me again "Ow! Will you stop that?!" I said rubbing my cheek "No! not tell you are truly sorry for what you did! Now tell me for my own enjoyment what that pain feels like because that's only a small bit! Of what angel and Nudge felt as you burned them!" I looked at the crazy girl "It hurts like pain! What do you think!?" I retorted.
I went to my room Neville, and the two boys; Ron and Harry, shared it with me. "So you know Max…?" Harry asked "Yeah we err grew up together I guess you could say." I shrugged "Do you think she might like me?" Harry asked I snorted "You like that lunatic!? Oh come on anyone can do better then her!" Harry looked a little sad "But do you think she might like me?" I sighed he wouldn't stop until I gave him an answer I was about to say she was taken but then I deicide to be evil "Yeah, she might she really likes it when people kiss her in front of Iggy." Harry smiled but then turned back to me "Why in front of Iggy?" I had to think of something "Err… Just because... so anyways just go up to her and Iggy tomorrow and kiss her she'll really love you then" I got into bed "Thanks mate I owe you!" He said happily and Neville blew out the candles.
Part 7
First class was potions with this really awesome professor his name is Snape. He was the nicest person you'll ever meet! Well to me that is, he yelled at Max and Iggy it was great! Then after class I asked him how to make a death potion and he just GAVE me the potion plus the directions so if I ever wanted to make one; but the one he gave me would kill like 50 people!
After class I was heading towards Charms when I saw Iggy, Max, and Harry in the hall they were talking about Snape then out of the blue Harry kissed Max.
Iggy didn't notice till he heard Max yelling at Harry "HOW DARE YOU!!!" she screamed and then she slapped him she and Iggy left. Harry got up and ran off crying I couldn't help laughing. "What's so funny?" It was Neville "Oh nothing come on we're going to be late."
A few weeks had gone by everything was ok in school Gazzy wrote to us every day it seemed. After he told us he almost burned down the kitchen; we got him a babysitter, Ari agreed to do it.
I hadn't used my death potion yet but I had someone I wanted to test it on his name was Draco Malfoy. He annoyed me half to death he liked to stare at this girl I sort of like her name is Luna Lovegood. Neville Introduced us she was weird but a funny kind of weird. So anyways back to my point; Draco needs to die.
Part 8
"YO DRACO!" I ran up to him "Yeah?" He turned around his ugly eyes looking at me, I wanted to punch him. "Want a Mountain Dew?" I asked holding a Mountain Dew in front of him. "Err… Sure…" He said taking it "WOW THIS IS GOOD! Is this a new-" He dropped dead. I laughed "Yeah its called death in a can it's for a limited time only!" I crushed his head under my boot and walked away.
"How did the blood get on your boot?" It was Luna "and is that white hair?" I looked down at my boot "Err… Changing the subject how are you Luna!?" She looked at me smiling "I'm great the nargles are really acting up this time of year…" Max came around and slapped me across the face "WILL YOU STOP THAT!" I yelled at her "You killed Draco!" She yelled "Ah, No I didn't…" I said worriedly Max broke down crying "Why Fang!? Why… we use to have something… but now I don't even know you…" Max sobbed I rolled my eyes she was crushed when I broke up with her; she cried for days and still even though she's going out with Iggy, tries to get me to love her once more. That will never happen I never even loved her.
I wanted her to get away from me I looked at Luna she was looking out the window. I smiled and pulled Luna close to me and kissed her. Long and hard, Max stood there mouth open tears still pouring from her face. "F-Fang! I-I..." she couldn't say any more and ran away.
I let go of Luna she looked dazed "T-that w-was… N-nice." Luna stuttered I walked away leaving Luna standing there dazed and confused.
Part 9
I heard about this dude named Voldemort he was trying to take over the world that's my job! Grr… He needed to die! "Yo Snape!" I went up to professor Snape "Yes Fang?" He asked "Where does Voldemort live?" I asked "Oh, he lives at 123 Sesame Street." I thanked him and went on my way I told Neville that I would be leaving for a while, and away I went; Neville would tell Max and Iggy for me.
"FANG! WAIT!" It was Iggy he was catching up to me "What do you want?" I asked "Don't do it! I beg of you come back!" I kicked Iggy in the chest he started choking up blood; He couldn't breathe it was awesome! He went falling to the earth I stopped to watch him "FAAAAANNNNGGGG!!! Before I die I have to tell you something!" Iggy screamed "WHAT?" I called back "FANG I AM YOUR BROTHER!! YOUR TWIN BROTHER!" I sighed "Yeah, I Know that already!" Iggy then got his wings to work and saved himself from his utmost doom.
Part 10
I made it to Sesame Street with the help of a little red monster named Elmo. I Found Voldemort's house and knocked on the door. "Hello?" He answered the door "Hello I'm Fang; would you like a Mountain Dew?" I asked in my sweetest voice "SURE! You know planning to rule the world and kill Harry Potter is hard work!" He took the can and gulped it down "WOW THIS IS GOOD! Is this a new-" he dropped dead I laughed now I'll have no one to get in my way as I take over the world!
When I got back to Hogwarts, Max was waiting for me. She slapped me across the face once more; I think it was becoming a sport for her. "You're Iggy's TWIN Brother and you never told me!?" Iggy was behind her "Iggy has many secrets he keeps from you…" I said trying to get her off my back. She turned to Iggy "Is that right? What are they Iggy?"
Part 11
Iggy glared at me "Well for one thing I err…" he looked away "Go on Ig just tell her!" Max glared at him she didn't know a lot about us things we decided to keep secret; tell now. Iggy looked at Max "Well you got to know sometime…"
"I'm not really blind." He said "WHAT!??? So you mean that time y-you walked in on me well I was getting into the shower you could see!?" Max yelled worriedly "Yup" Ig said snickering "I just faked it to get more sympathy from you people it was easy all I had to do was walk into a few walls every once in awhile and fall down the stairs a few times!" He laughed. Max stood there her mouth wide open "are there any other big secrets you're keeping from me?!"
"Yeah, I'm also not a blond, I'm supposed to have black hair like Fang but I got tired of looking like him so I dyed it. OH! And My eyes aren't blue their dark brown but I wear colour contacts." He said rather bravely "A-and when did all this happen!?" Max yelled Iggy and I looked at each other "When you were in testing before we met. Then we met you deiced you're a lunatic and promised never to tell you that we're brothers or that Iggy's not blind nor a blond." I said blankly beginning to walk away.
Part 12
Neville had introduced me to this girl in Slytherin; her name is Savannah Hall. Neville told me that he likes her and wanted me to meet her, so I did. She sort of scares me for no reason that I know of.
"I know what you are going to do." I jumped and turned around it was Savannah; we were the only two in the hall way. "Yeah is that right then what am I planning to do?" I asked like she knew "You're going to try to take over the world oh and that you have killed over ten people." She said calmly. Ok so she knew, "H-how do you know?" I didn't tell anyone that! How would she know?
"I read your dairy" She shrugged "It's not a dairy!" I needed her gone or she might go tell everyone "I won't tell IF I can be a part of it you know help take over the world and IF when and if you succeed in it I want my own country." She said slyly "That's Black mail!" This Savannah girl was smart I could use a girl like her on my side, so I had to let my pride go. "Sure, why not but you can't tell anyone, or do anything against me ever!" She smiled and raised two of her fingers to her forehead then saluted "Scouts Honor!"
Part 13
"Max, Iggy, and Fang I need to talk to you!" it was professor McGonagall she had came to our Magical Creatures' class. We went with her to the castle; there we went to her office. "Madam?" Iggy bowed a little; what a little suck up. "So children we've been trying to find out who your parents are and so we did some testing and well…" she trailed off. "Well what?" Max asked Professor McGonagall looked at us
"You're all brothers and sister; you're all triplets in fact." All our mouths dropped open this means Iggy and I made-out with our SISTER! I got to go wash my mouth out. "W-WHAT Y-YOU MEAN I'VE BEEN MAKING-OUT WITH MY OWN BROTHERS!?!?" Max yelled Professor McGonagall nodded and left us to "think about this."
"This isn't weird at all…" Iggy said shocked that he had been making-out with Max just this morning. I nodded "…y-yeah…" I said but then realized that with the lunatic girl as my sister; she would never brother me for a date again! I hope.
Part 14
"Fang, so do you have any plans to take over the world?" Savannah asked we just told Neville and he agreed to be on my side. Well, we didn't mean to tell Neville he just kind of walked in well we were talking about it.
"Uh, well I was hoping that with all our powers we might be able to destroy our enemies." Savannah sighed "No plan huh? Well we'll think of one." I nodded "Err… so why are we taking over the world?" Neville asked "So we can rule everyone and they have to fallow us MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" I sighed, we must work on a plan and we will.
"FANG!!!!!" Max screamed running up to me "Their here and there taking everyone!" Iggy was behind her he was holding his contact case apparently he had been trying to put them in or out since one of his eyes was dark brown and the other icy blue. "What do you mean?" I asked just then two death eaters came and took away Savannah and Neville "We got to go Fang!" I nodded and broke a window I spread my wings, and was about to jump. When, "FANG HELP!!" Max screamed two more death eaters were holding Max and Iggy. I jumped down and slashed the death eater's faces with glass; I just lost my two best friends I wasn't about to loss my siblings. We jumped out the window and began to fly away.
"Their after you! You killed their leader!" Max yelled. Oh I forgot about that Heh, we made it to the three broom sticks and went inside to think this thing over.
"What now?" Iggy said staring at his butter beer. The two death eaters that took Neville and Savannah came in laughing; Anger shot through me. "YO!" I called to them "Yeah?" They turned to me "YOU!" they hissed "I want my friends back!" I hissed back they thought it over "Lets play a game if you win you can have them if we win you come with us!" Max and Iggy motioned "No, don't do it" to me but I smiled "Sure, what do you got in mind?"
"You are going to rap." What do they mean 'rap?' "Err what?" I asked "You know Rap like the singing kind of rap." One answered, ok then let's see "Give me a minute to think of one."
Here's my Rap:
"YO, YO, YO;
I'm Fang
I can rap with a Pang,
I have a sis and bro
I hate them
You can take them
And mate them?
I used to own a cat his name was Pudge
He liked to play with Nudge
Pudge got eaten by a dog
I killed Nudge with a log
Yo,
You better watch out
Or I'll put you out
I like Mike-ikes
They taste like bikes
I like to kill with pills
But I don't like bills
I own a gun
And I killed a nun
Err…
Jolt juice is awesome
It'll wake you with a bolt
This Rap is over
It sucked I know"
People In the bar clapped I bowed, the Death eaters weren't impressed. "Yeah, the last part was true but it was a rap so we'll only take 1/3 of our prize." They took Iggy and left.
Part 15
"FANG THEY TOOK IGGY!" Max yelled in my ear as I sat down and took a sip of butter beer. "Yup" I said over my cup, Max stared at me like I was the worst person in the world.
She went around the table to me, and slapped my cup out of my hand spilling butter beer all over the place. "HOW CAN YOU BE SO HEARTLESS!?" She yelled again.
"Well after years of living through pain and misery you get used to it." I said helping one of the workers clean up the mess. Max took me by my shirt collar and roughly pulled me back up. She then slapped me across the face. Again.
"WOULD YOU STOP THAT!?" I yelled at her. She stared me straight in the eyes a little idiotic grin on her face. I couldn't help me self I couldn't stop what I did next; I punched her. Hard right in the face, she fell to the ground with a thud, her nose bleeding. I should've stopped there yet, I didn't I had to go farther.
I kicked her in the chest, she screamed in agony. Yet, no one in the bar blinked twice about it. "Fang…." I heard and spun around to see,
"Nudge?! B-but how?" Nudge ran to me stepping on Max in the process. "They took Angel and me to a hospital! And we got better and Gazzy told me where you might be!" I hugged her.
"N-Nudge h-help me…" Max moaned coughing blood up. Nudge looked at her, and back at me I sighed and motioned her to do so.
"I don't know you any more Fang… It seems like your just turning into a pimp!" Max cried I shrugged and we left.
Part 16
We were flying back to the house; to be mean to Max I told Nudge she could talk as MUCH as she wanted so she did.
"I like muffins do you like muffins Fang? I hate Max's muffins they taste like rocks that have been marked by dogs. Fang are you going to blog about this? At home I went on you blog you haven't blogged for awhile. I want a pet turtle or maybe a zebra Gazzy wants a zebra! I want a tail you know how cool it would be to have a tail it would be so awesome! I'm hungry I want pizza; let's go to chuck-E-cheeses! FAAAANNNGGG??? How are babies made??? I think they are made by Elves and then on Christmas Eve Santa deliver them to all the good boys and girls! Don't you think so to? OOO Look something Shiny! I wonder if it's a- oh never mind it's a car! I want to get married when I'm 13 to a prince! Who lives in Ireland! Then we would dance all day! My favorite colour is PURPLE!!! I like purple it's so pretty! Like a lollypop! I also like… COOKIES!! All Kinds of cookies I like sugar and Chocolate and Chocolate chip and sugar! I like unicorns to! There real you know THEY ARE! I met Naruto the other day He and I shared Ramen! It's Yummy! I like singing! !!!! I like swimming! Do you know angel can breathe under water I DID! YAY LOOK I CAN DO A BACK FLIP! WHEEEEEE!!! Max! Angel missed you! I didn't really I missed Fang through… Gazzy and Angel are with Ari he's soooooo nice! I drew a Picture of you Fang it's at the House I hope you like! Oh and Neville and Savannah are there as well!!!!"
I stopped her, "Did you say Neville and Savannah?" I asked her "Yeah… they claim to be your friends" Nudge said and went back into her rant I blocked her out and went deep into my thoughts. Until I flew into the house; Max Laughed and flew inside the house I rubbed my nose and went in.
Part 17
Ahh my team was there: Gazzy, Neville, and Savannah all waiting for me in the kitchen. Nudge, Max, Angel, and Ari went to go 'talk.' I on the other hand had my own catching up to do.
"We caught Gazzy up." Neville said passing me a cup of coffee. "You didn't tell me we were going to take over the world that's so AWESOME!!! I can't wait!" Gazzy said shaking with happiness. I smiled and ruffled his hair "It is it is." I said calmly. "Where's the blind kid?" Savannah asked taking one of the muffins Neville put in front of us.
"He was taken. We have to go save him." I said also taking a muffin, "Why? I thought he was nothing to you?" I looked up and squashed the muffin in my hand.
"Because he's my brother…"
"AWWW that's so sweet!" Neville said. "Where might the death eaters be?" I asked waiting for someone to answer.
"I think I know where they might be." Savannah said "WHERE!?" I demanded. "You won't like it." She said taking a bite of muffin. "I don't like anything now tell me." I demanded once more.
She looked at me, "They might be in Share-a-lot."
Part 18
"You mean the place with the gay bears?" Savannah nodded. "Let's go. Gazzy you take Neville, Savannah you can ride with me." I said getting up Gazzy grabbed a hold of Neville, flow outside, and waited for us.
"Ready?" I asked savannah offering her my hand. She kicked me in the shin. I rubbed the place she kicked. "Be glad it wasn't higher. Now I have my own means of transportation." She took out a broom and flow out meeting Gazzy and Neville.
I fallowed, we flew for seemed hours till we made it to Share-a-lot.
They only thing they share there are STDs, and then we saw them; Death eaters!
"Let's go!" I said flying after them. They ran into a big, prison like building when they saw me. Neville opened it with magic; we flew in and spilt up.
Part 19
I saw him; Iggy. He was in a jail cell he was bleeding from the head, but looked alive. "IGGY!" I called he looked up.
"How did you find me?" Iggy said getting up and going to the bars. "Savannah. Come on let's get you out." He nodded and stood back. I pulled out my wand and was about to say a spell, when dementors came around me.
Iggy dropped to the ground screaming in pain. The dementors came closer to me trying to get me to fall to the ground and so they could steal my soul, but I wouldn't. Dementors power is they show you your worst fear then steal your soul. For some reason it wasn't working with me, I just stood there nothing happening. I was watching Iggy in horror as the dementors tried going after his soul. I remembered the charm.
"Expecto Patrono!" I yelled. A hawk came out of my wand and started attacking, and killing the dementors.
Part 20
I helped Iggy up. "You ok?" He nodded; I made chocolate with my wand and gave it to him. Savannah, Neville, and Gazzy came running up to us.
"Are you two ok?" Neville asked I nodded "Let's go home." I said and we went.
I put Iggy in his bed to rest and went to the living room. "So now that's done we can plot to take over the world right?" Gazzy asked. I sighed; I wanted to put that off till Iggy was completely better.
"Sure but we won't take over the world till Iggy is better K?" I asked, they all nodded and started plotting among themselves.
I will rule the world just not today or this week, but just you wait I will Rule the World and when I do, you better watch out.
End.
