Ten years had passed since I first went to Wonderland. It was the most frightening experience of my life, but it took me 10 years to realize that it was also the most extraordinary experience of my life. I was just a child when I first somehow crossed over. A child who desperately needed escape from the harsh realities and mundane routines in this world.
How I crossed over the first time is still a mystery. Over and over I tried crawling into the same rabbit hole, but it never took me. That is what prompted me to visit her. The locals called her a witch. I suppose that is the best word to describe her, but it seemed somehow derogatory after I got to know her. She was kind to me. Perhaps the only person in this world that was. My family certainly wasn't, but I digress. Lady Faeryn knew from the moment I stepped in her cottage that there was a power inside me. It was this that allowed me to cross.
I still remember her voice as I stepped through the doorway of her small cottage. I was expecting a cold, dreary lair, but instead I was treated to warmth and light and the smell of something comforting cooking in her fireplace. It was a modest place, what you might expect from an outcast (of course, I was one to talk about being an outcast), but it felt safe.
"My dear Alice, never have I felt such strength in a mortal before," she said barely speaking above a whisper.
"You know my name? Have we met before?"
"You could say that, but we have never met in this earthly realm." Her voice was musical, and it had a youthfulness to it that did not quite match the age in her skin.
Confused by her answer I considered turning around and going home. Perhaps she was as dangerous as the townsfolk had always said. Of course, what home did I have to go back to? The one I ran from weeks before? Lady Faeryn was my only chance to leave this world behind. I knew the Queen of Hearts and the Red Queen would still be looking for me when I returned, but I thought about the brave knight who had helped me find a safe place to hide. I hoped he would be willing to help again, but even so, the queens were no trouble compared to what I was leaving behind. His kind face with such brilliant green eyes often showed up in my dreams.
Lady Faeryn knew immediately of the world I told her I wished to travel to and agreed to help me cross over, for reasons that I did not understand at the time. Several months passed, and we trained daily doing the most bizarre tasks. My first was to make a teacup dance across the table without touching it.
"Excuse me?" I blurted out when she asked me to perform such a ludicrous task.
"The teacup. Make it dance," she repeated sternly.
I admit at first I was slightly intimidated by her. For such a small woman, she seemed to take up the whole of her cottage. Her wild gray hair stuck out in all directions and her face always had a secretive expression. Indeed her face was a mystery in all sorts of ways. She was old, in her 80's perhaps, this age was evident in her face, but there were no lines, no spots, just beauty.
She stared me down intently as I looked helplessly at the teacup. Again, I considered walking out her door.
"And what will you find out there? More people to torment you, to force you into a life of strife and poverty? More people who will hurt you for simply being alive?"
Shocked by her words which were unsettlingly truthful, I stopped concentrating on the cup. So when it fell to the floor and shattered, I nearly leapt out of my skin.
"I told you you had the strength," Lady Fae said matter-of-factly.
She graciously accepted me into her home as I had nowhere else to go. I had a small corner with a few blankets. It wasn't much, but it was better than where I came from. It took many more days of mental exercise to manage the teacup properly, and I began to fear my own mind knowing it had this kind of power. Growing up I had always been told magic and witchcraft and sorcery were tools of the Devil. I wasn't sure if what I was doing was magic or witchcraft, but it didn't feel like a tool of the Devil. I could feel the power inside myself like any other natural ability. Like singing or walking. Within several more weeks, I had nearly mastered moving objects. Now, Lady Fae was teaching me to move myself. It seemed infinitely more difficult.
"You must concentrate very hard on where you want to end up," she explained to me. "It can be done."
She demonstrated this power with ease, moving from one end of the cottage to the other.
I concentrated hard, feeling the power bubble up inside me. I could feel spasms in my muscles and I started to see the other side of the room like I was there. Panting and shaking my body gave out. I collapsed on the ground and I felt myself jolt to back to the side of the room I started on. Lady Fae laid a gentle hand on my shoulder and handed me a cup of tea.
"Tell me dear Alice, what did you see? What did you feel?"
"I felt like I was across the room," I responded, still breathless.
"Your body never left physically, but if you have moved in spirit, that is a good sign. Excellent work, dear."
"Thank you, Lady Fae. You've been so good to me. Why?"
"Alice, it should not surprise you that I know much about your life, perhaps more than you know yourself. Your desire to go back there despite all the risks and dangers isn't just the boredom of teenage girl. Nor is it your because of your past. You've already escaped the dangers in your life by finding me. I could protect you indefinitely from the awful people you escaped from. Your desire to go remains even though you know you are safe. You belong there, Alice. It is your destiny. I have to help you go back. I must send you to meet your destiny."
I sat stunned, still shaking from my exertions. I began to feel tears forming in my eyes as she reached out and took my free hand.
"Also my dear, I could never turn away such a kind soul. I could feel how pure you were the first day you walked in here. I knew how badly you needed sanctuary, and I am not made of stone. I've grown to love you, Alice, like a daughter."
Now the tears were in both our eyes. I sat up and we embraced. I had never been loved before. It felt like all the storybooks had told me it would feel…
