When You Wish Upon a Star
Garrus sighed heavily as he exited the main battery. The Normandy's crew deck was silent in the middle of the night, and he made his way over to the kitchen and quietly warmed the first hot dextro hot liquid he could find; he didn't think it tasted good enough to really warrant a name. All sleep gave him were nightmares about Palaven, Menae, and his family, so he figured he might was well just stay up. They were heading to Grissom Academy which would take another day so he wasn't worried about sleep deprivation in the event the Commander chose him to accompany her.
The Commander… It felt so good to see her again on Menae, to fall in line and watch her six like he had since the beginning of this hell. But after returning to the Normandy, if he wasn't worrying over his family he was thinking about her and that time before the Omega 4 Relay, and then the time after she blew up the Bahak system. Back then he figured it was the adrenaline the stress causing their desires for each other, they were best friends anyway so it was natural. He saw it happen a lot when he was in the Turian fleet. Eventually he figured nothing would come of it, but the small, chaste kiss she gave him a few nights ago got him thinking and wondering. Did she really want something more? He wouldn't object, she was the most incredible being he had ever met, but was it right?
He took the full mug and looked at the battery. There was no way he could do any work now. He walked around the mess table, past the crew's quarters and was about to open the Starboard Observation deck when he hear a sound coming from the other side. Garrus paused and craned his neck closer to the door, trying to figure out who was inside, and he heard a female singing softly,
When you wish upon a star
Makes no difference who you are
Anything your heart desires
Will come to you
Curious, Garrus tapped the green button and the doors slid open. He stepped inside quietly, but the singing, though shaky sounding, didn't stop. All he could see was the back of a hoodie, if he remembered the term correctly, the red and white N7 stamped on the hood poking out from over the sofa. The Commander? He slowly walked around the sofa, not wanting to startle her.
If your heart is in your dream
No request is too extreme
When you wish upon a star
As dreamer do
Commander Jeyne Shepherd's head snapped up to him, the silence ringing in the air. Her hardened bottle green eyes glared at him for a moment before they widened slightly in surprise. She looked tired and, Spirits… she was crying. She turned away from him, staring back out into the starry sky and wiped her eyes with the black sleeves of her sweater. Garrus sat down quietly next to her and stared at his coffee. He felt her head press against his shoulder and she placed her hand just above his knee, neither of which he minded. He was surprised, though, when she started to sing again softly.
Fate is kind
She brings to those who love
The sweet fulfillment of
Their secret longing
Like a bolt out of the blue
Fate steps in and sees you through
When you wish upon a star
Your dreams come true
Her voice sound stronger than it had when he first entered. Did his presence change something? He took a sip of his drink, careful not to disturb the woman leaning against him. What now? A lame joke? She always seemed to like those…
Garrus coughed. "Well, it's good to know your singing is somewhat better than your dancing."
Shepard chuckled and punch him lightly. "Shut up. What are you doing up this late anyway?" She leaned back into the couch, unfortunately removing her warm hand from his leg. Instead, she stuffed it into the pockets of her black N7 hoodie, wearing her black sweatpants to match. Her head was partially snuggled into the hood, and her flaming red hair, usually pulled into a pristine bun, was wildly sticking out from the hood. He wasn't used to seeing her so informally, despite their previous intimacy. Oddly, Garrus liked seeing her this way as much as he did in her armor.
"I think I should be asking you that, considering I just woke up," he replied. He took a sip of his drink as she gave him a wry smile.
"Well, I am from the City that Never Sleeps," she half-joked. "You know, New York City."
Garrus knew nothing about New York City. That bothered him more than it should have. "They don't ever sleep in the city? Don't all humans need rest?" he asked.
She chuckled, "It's figurative. The city is so full of tourists that the main area, Times Square, is lit up all night with people going in and out of stores. During the day, everyone is hustling from place to place going to work, meetings, shopping… There's so much activity that, well, it seems like the city never sleeps."
Garrus couldn't imagine it. Even the Citadel had parts that seemed to shut down after a certain time and on Palaven schedules were strict; no one went out after a certain time because that was meant for sleeping. It wasn't enforced but it was expected. To have such a large city operating all day and all night was unthinkable. He couldn't imagine it. But he bet Kaiden would know… That was Garrus' problem. He understood how to follow orders and backup his Commander, and he knew how to talk, laugh, and flirt with Shepard, but Jeyne? Just Jeyne? Talking about Earth, about human things made him feel so… inadequate. Jeyne deserved someone who would understand all of her facets, not just some of them. She shouldn't have to give a giant back story any time she wanted to share a small bit of information from her life with him. He didn't understand her culture, her world, like he should. Leaving Kaiden for him just didn't make sense.
"Don't worry," Shepard said as she turned her attention back to the large observatory window, "You'll see it one day. I'll show you Lady Liberty myself."
The uncomfortable silence that followed filled in the subtext perfectly: If the Reapers haven't destroyed the city, if they haven't destroyed Earth, if we don't lose.
If we're still alive.
Garrus finished his drink and, wanting to change the subject, he asked, "So, why that particular song? You were singing about wishing on a star?"
She didn't turn to look at him as she replied, "It's an old, classic, song written for a children's vid way before I was born. I saw a shooting star, or something like it, and it reminded me of the vid."
"A shooting star?" Garrus' mandibles twitched. He didn't know what she was talking about. Again.
"They're meteors entering an atmosphere, but we don't call them that," she paused, "at least on Earth. When you see one you're supposed to make a wish."
She looked over at him and, probably from the baffled expression on his face, asked, "Don't you make wishes on Palaven?"
"Are you kidding?" Garrus snorted. "Turians serve the Hierarchy, and devote ourselves to military superiority. If I told my father I wished for something, he would tell me to just make it happen. Wishes are for beings who can't follow through to get what they want." He paused before adding, "Or so they say."
"That makes sense, I guess, if you wish for things you can control," she mused.
"Control? Such as?"
"Fighting the Reapers. Getting help from Wrex. Finding a way to unite the galaxy."
Garrus arched his brows. "That's what we can control?"
Shepard shrugged, "It's something I can actively do. I can have conversations, I can make decisions, I can do things that will affect that outcome. Some things, no matter how hard you try can't be changed."
Garrus paused for a moment. "You mean like Udina being a complete ass?"
Shepard snorted before bursting into laughter. Garrus smiled. He was glad he was making her feel better, if only a little. "Yes, exactly like that," she sighed, calming down. "I make wishes that are based on hope and faith. Like getting out of New York's ghetto and into the Alliance." She grinned mischievously at him, a look he was all too familiar with. "I'm not sure what would have happened if I didn't try to pickpocket Anderson that night."
Garrus stared at her wide eyed. "You tried to pickpocket… Anderson?" He burst into laughter. He just imagined Anderson looking down at a spiteful, pissed-off Shepard with the will of a Krogan telling him to screw off.
"It's pretty funny, looking back anyway," she said. "I'm not sure what he saw in me but when I told him I was going to get out of that shit-hole no matter what, he asked if I wanted to join the Marines. He's been watching over me ever since."
Her face fell for a moment and he put a comforting hand on her shoulder. She smiled weakly at him and looked back outside. Wanting to keep her attention off of the situation on Earth, Garrus asked, "No offense, Shepard, but isn't dreaming about something you can't change, well…" he let the thought trail, trying to find the right words.
"Foolish?" she finished. "Yeah, I guess so, but sometimes it's all that keeps me going. That small spark can take me a long way." She paused, eying him curiously for a moment before smiling slyly. "You know there was this one time I had to track down this Archangel guy, I mean supposedly he was a great sniper, but there was no way he could compare to my favorite sniper. All I wished for on the way to Omega was to have him at my back instead of this random merc."
Garrus couldn't help but grin. "Oh, is that so?"
"Oh yeah I mean this Archangel sounded like nasty business, holed up against the Blue Suns, Blood Pack, and Eclipse. Sure he was a vigilante but you know how I feel about mercs; untrustworthy, money-grubbing…"
She was being really corny, even for his or Joker's standards, but she was also being really flirty… and cute. He'd bite. "I think this... Archangel sounds like a badass."
"Mmm… I suppose," she teased. "But you know what? He ended up being the guy I was looking for, the one I wanted all along."
Guy? The one? Not Turian, or sniper, or friend. Male. One.
The humor was dying on her face as she slowly reached up and placed her hand on his scarred face. He breathed in sharply at the warmth of her touch. "You know, I was so happy to see you that day I literally almost threw myself at you." Her voice was so soft it was almost a whisper.
Garrus wanted to pull her in for a kiss and place his forehead against hers, but he resigned himself to banter. "That soon Shepard? Well damn."
Jeyne threw her head back and laughed, "Not in that way! Just to hug you, to greet you."
"Which knowing you, your momentum would still push me to the ground and then we would have ended up in a very precarious position in front of Jacob and Miranda."
She rolled her eyes with a wide smile. "Sure, Vakarian, Sure."
She settled back into the couch and stared back out at the stars with a small smile on her lips. Spirits, he couldn't help himself around her. He wanted to be with her, to keep her smiling and laughing despite their imminent doom. As hard as it was to relate to her sometimes, he loved being with Jeyne and talking with her like a normal being about the past, home, friends, family, laughing and joking about stupid things. This was a side not many saw of her, she couldn't afford it, but he wanted to be there for her when she had to let the Commander's wall fall, and when Shepard's selfless image beings to crack.
So to hell with it. He would learn as much as he could about Earth and he wasn't going to let Kaiden come back and sweep her away. He was going to be on her six, at the battery waiting for his turn in her rounds, and here on the sofa when she needed him most.
He just wished that she felt as deeply about him as he did for her.
"Jeyne," he called gently, "What did you wish for?" She looked up at him surprised and he noticed her cheeks turn a few shades lighter than her hair. That was a good thing right?
Instead of responding, she lifted his arm and moved up against him, resting her head on his shoulder. His arm wrapped around hers gently and he liked the feeling of her nuzzling into him as she made herself comfortable.
"I can't tell you what I wished for, then it won't come true." Her soft voice seemed to float upward as he felt he breathing steady. "But it may have to do with Archangel, that crazy badass…"
Garrus smiled as he leaned his head back against the top of the couch. Just as he was nodding off, he could have sworn he saw a bright streak fly across the sky.
I'm replaying the series and I forgot how much I love these games. This is my first fic for the universe, and I may do a longer series but we'll see. (I'm still not sure if I'm feeling the characters right.) Also, I really love George RR Martin's spelling of "Jane" as "Jeyne" so I used it. I hope you enjoyed the fic!
