In Loving Memory A/N I do not own Castle or it's characters- they belong to our great creator , Andrew Marlowe. I'm just a geeky fan with a vivid imagination. I wrote this in honor of Johanna Beckett. Please, read and be sure to leave your comments. Both good and bad are appreciated. Thanks!

In the state between sleep and wakefulness, Rick rolled onto his side and reached for Kate, wanting nothing more than to hold her next to him. His hand only met the cool mattress beside him. He opened his eyes and sat up to look the sleep from his eyes with the heels of both hands and sure enough, her side of the bed was empty. He got up and checked the bathroom. Not there. He didn't smell coffee brewing, but maybe she was in the kitchen. He put on his robe and went to the kitchen. She wasn't there, either He looked out the window and saw that another 2 inches of snow had fallen through the night. Where the hell had she gone in this type of weather? He had left his cell on the desk in his office, so he headed there to call her. The date appeared on his phone: Jan. 9th! Oh, hell, surely she hadn't gone out there in this! It was 20 degrees outside with six inches of snow on the ground and more prdicted o fall throughout the day.

He understood why she would want to go there, but was very worried about her. And how long had she been gone? He had to find her. The only problem was he didn't know which cemetery her mom was buried in and the quickest way to find out was to phone Jim. He hated to call him this early and cause him to worry. He knew it would be a futile attempt, but he tried her cell before calling her dad. No answer. Straight to voicemail, which meant she had her cell turned off… Damn It! He hung up and immediately called Jim. "Good mormimg, Jim. I hate to wake you at such an early hour, but have you heard from Kate?" "No, I haven't. Isn't she there with you?" "Well, she was last night, but when I woke up a few minutes ago, she was gone. I tried her cell, but it goes straight to voice mail. I hate to say it, but I think she's gone to her mother's grave and I'm worried about her being out in this weather I'm going after her. She can chew my ass for it later, but I'll deal with that then. Can you tell me the name and address of the cemetery?" "Sure. Maybe I should get dressed and come with you." "I appreciate the offer, Jim, but there's no need for both of us to get out.""Okay. But call me when you find her","Thanks, I will." Jim rattled off the name and address and Rick wrote them on a notepad, he kept on his desk. He dressed as quickly as he could On his way out the door, he snatched the blanket they had cuddled ubder last night during their movie night and as an after thought, grabbed the flowers he had had delivered to her yesterday.

They wouldn't last long out in this weather, but he would take care of that later and order another bouquet for Kate as well. He didn't think she'd mind. There she was- about 50 yards away. A lonely, stark, figure against all the whitness of the snow.

He asked the cab driver to wait with the engine and heat running, grabbed the blanket and the flowers from the seat and headed her way. As she heard him approach, she turned to him, surprised, she asked'CASTLE/ how did you…""We'll talk about that later. Right now, I'm just glad you're okay." She bowed her head and looked up at him "Please, don't be mad," He wrapped the blanket around her head and shoulders."No. I understand. But if you had said something, I would have come with you," "I know. I'm sorry I left without a word or note" He pulled her into his arms. She was trembling and cold. She melted into his embrace and after a few minutes said, "It's so unfair, Castle! She should be here to meet you and your family, to see me walk down the aisle, to bounce our children on her knee…" "I know. If it were within my reach, I'd gladly bring her back for all of us, but I can't I wish I had all the right words to say to you, to bring you some comfort, , but for the life of me, I can't think of any. He tightened his arms around her and she snuggled in closer to him. "I know, babe and I love you even more for it," "Look. I know, I'll never be able to meet her, but I know her," She looked up at him quizically."I know that you had her for 19 years of your life and in raising you to be the woman you are today and I'm so thank-ful that she was responsible for that. In a way, by giving birth to you, she gave you to me. The children we'll have, you'll instill the same morals, values, into their lives.

I don't know a whole lot, and I'm not particularly a religious man, but I think, she's always with you. She lives on in your heart ,your memories and no evil Senator can take that away from you.." Through the mists of her tears, she looked up at him. He brushed the pads of his thumbs under her eyes to wipe away her smiled and said, "Richard Edgar, Alexander Rogers Castle, I love you." He smiled, "I love you, too. Now, why don't we get you in where its warm. I know this diner down the street with cups of steaming hot coffee…" "Ofcourse, you do," she teased. She gave him a quick peck on the lips, "Let's go." He placed the flowers he had brought from the loft in the built in vase at the base of the headstone. "I didn't think you'd mind. They won't last long out here, but I'll take care of that later and I'll send you some more, too. ou , know. I'm glad I came here today. I think she would approve ." She smiled at him, "Yeah. I think she would, too." "Besides, coming here today gave me a nane for our daughter… when the time comes," She laughed,"Daughter, huh? And that name would be..?" "What else? Johanna Kate Castle" "You'd do that?" "Sure. What would be wrong with that?" "Nothing. In fact, I kinda like it." She hesitated befor continuing," It's jusy I was hoping to give you the one thing no other woman has given you." "And what would that be?", he asked. "A son", she replied. He smiled down at her, "Why can't we have both?" "One at a time. Mister. One at a time." He laughed and tugged at her hand. "Let's go" Hand in hand, they started for the waiting cab. As they were walking away, Castle said. "A son. hmmm. Do you think we could name him Cosmo?" She laughed out loud."We can discuss that later." "Okay. Can we go home and practice making little Johana or baby Cosmo?" "Count on it", she replied.