All about what happened between Gibbs' departure and his return.
Hope you guys will like it! :)
Will probably update once a week, so stay tuned!


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It was dark in the bullpen. Most of the agents had already left for the night after a day of hard work.

Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo sat alone at his desk in the bullpen, starring hard at his boss's desk, or more accurately, his ex-boss's desk. He seemed still as a statue for a long time, until he finally moved and glanced down at his watch. It was nearly five o-clock in the morning.

After the startling departure of Gibbs, Tony had sent the entire team home, and amazingly nobody had seemed to have the energy to argue with him. Ziva had given him a concern look, but at the slight-shake of his head, she left without another word. McGee had this "the-whole-world-is-collapsing-but-I-don't-know-what-to-do" look on his face, so Tony gave him a small pat on the back and a reassuring nod, and the probie left too. That left only Abby. She had looked up at Tony with pleading eyes, wanting him to tell her that Gibbs will be back and everything will be fine, but for the first time since he met her, Tony couldn't meet her eyes. She had then left too without a word or a usual hug, but that was okay, because Tony knew McGee was waiting for her in the elevator. McGee will take care of her.

Tony sat upright at his desk and buried his head in his hands, completely unsure how to deal with the situation. He would always ask Gibbs for advice at times like this, but he couldn't this time. The marine's phone went to voicemail immediately when Tony had tried to call him. He reckoned Gibbs had tossed his mobile phone out of the plane, assuming that the old man had already board a plane to Mexico.

The watch on his wrist beeped, indicating that it was five o-clock in the morning now. Tony sighed and looked up from his hands. It was already starting to get bright outside. Soon, agents will filed in the building and in a millisecond, everyone would know what happened to the Major Crime Response Team, and everyone will expect him, the new team leader to have all the right answers and do all the right things to lead the team back on the right track. Tony suddenly had an overwhelming urge to run from the building and join Gibbs in Mexico.

Before Tony could carry out his plan, a figure stood in front of him and blocked off his source of light.

"DiNozzo."

It was the director.

Great. Tony groaned internally.

He managed a half-pained smile before replying. "Director?"

Jenny looked at him with some sort of sadness in her eyes. "I'm sorry, Agent DiNozzo."

"What are you sorry for? Director?" Tony noticed his voice level increasing, but he suddenly didn't care anymore. He was angry, no, he was furious.

"For the situation you are in."

"What situation?" He managed before he stood up abruptly, his anger suddenly becoming obvious to himself. "Oh. You mean this?" He gestured around the bullpen. "You mean this situation where I just got promoted by him to team leader?" He was nearly shouting now. "Why would you even be SORRY about it? It's good news, director! We should be celebrating or something, we should put up some balloons, open some champagne and…"

"Tony." Jenny interrupted his ranting. Somehow, the used of his first name calmed him down a bit. Jenny put a hand up on his arm.

"Again, I'm sorry." And they both knew what she was really apologizing for.

"If you're not ready, it's fine. I can arrange for another agent to fill in his post."

Tony's eyes twitched at that and he stared hard at the director.

"You don't have to follow his orders anymore, Tony."

They were both painfully aware that neither of them was referring to Gibbs by his name anymore.

"You know I will, like I always have."

Jenny gave him a small smile. "I know."

They stared at each other in the eyes for awhile, a new sense of understanding and communication settling between them.

Before turning to leave, Jenny paused and looked at Tony uncertainly.

Tony raised an eyebrow. "Anything else? Jenny?"

She smiled at the usage of her first name, but turned serious again. "He does care about you and the team, Tony. You all are a family. Remember that."

Somehow the word "family" and Gibbs connected together sent a wave of emotions through Tony which he really didn't want to think about right now. He just nodded blankly.

"Good luck, Tony."

Staring at the director's retreating back, Tony let out a long breath and made a decision in his head. If Gibbs wanted him to lead this team, then he will. And he was not going to screw this up in any way.


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At seven o-clock sharp, the elevator in the bullpen ding, and two of the team's agents walked out. In an instant, they noticed every other agent stopped talking all of a sudden and were obviously avoiding eye contact with them. Of course, every living person in this building and even outside this building would have heard about the "issue". They were all talking and discussing about it.

McGee and Ziva ignored the weird atmosphere, and walked on to their desks. Tony was nowhere to be seen and Gibbs' desk, of course, was vacant. Just as they dropped their gears onto the floor and the chatter in the bullpen started to pick up again, the elevator ding, and walking out of it was their new team leader, Abby, Ducky and Palmer. The chatter in the bullpen ceased at once.

Tony walked on with Abby, Ducky and Palmer right behind him, ignoring the agents on the floor that were currently all staring at him. He stopped right at the center of his team's desks.

"Okay. Gather around team." His team followed his order naturally, like they had been doing it for ages.

At this point, every agent on the floor was listening in.

"He's gone." Tony said quietly. "And…" He looked around at the team. "And we need to move on."

Abby sniffed.

"I don't know whether he's ever going to come back or not, but we can't afford to sit around and just wait blindly."

"Then what should we do?" McGee asked.

"We do what we do best, McGee. We solve cases, and we help people. Just like we always did."

The team members nodded.

"I'm team leader from now on, and I expect each and every one of you to follow my orders and my lead without unnecessary arguments."

All of them had never saw Tony such serious before. They nodded silently again.

"Good. One last thing, if anyone had any issue with me being team leader, I need you to tell me right now."

"No." "Of course not." They all murmured together.

Tony nodded, and casted a look over his team members. "Well?"

The team looked at him questioningly.

"Get back to work!" He said, with a flicker of his hand.

His team scrambled apart immediately. Tony watched them go, and turned to face Gibbs desk.

"There, boss. Think I handled it alright? I did fine, didn't I?" Tony questioned silently, and knew well that he was never going to get an answer.

"Tony?" Ziva called from her desk, shaking Tony out of his silent thoughts.

"Ziva?" He walked over to her desk. She was holding a folder out to him.

"My report. About the case."

Tony raised an eyebrow at her. He still hadn't taken the folder from her. "Wrong, Ziva."

"Wrong?" She looked utterly confused.

"All reports need to be reviewed and signed by the senior field agent before being handed to me."

He paused, and smiled. "Which means…" He extended his finger and pointed it to McGee's direction. "Give it to him first."

Tony didn't need to turn around to know that McGee was looking shocked.

"Me?" McGee stood up and walked over to them.

"Well of course, M-c-G-e-e." Tony pronounced McGee's name in a way to make it obvious that he was no longer calling the new senior field agent "probie". "Who else would it be?"

Understanding dawned on McGee's face and he gulped hard. "Er, right. Give that to me Ziva."

"And they better be on my desk when I come back from my coffee break." Tony announced, before turning and leaving towards the direction of the break room.

McGee and Ziva were momentarily stunned.

"Wow." Finally, McGee managed.

Ziva nodded. "I know."

"You think we'll be fine?"

"Tony is a very capable leader, McGee."

"I know he is, but everything's different now isn't it? I mean, we're one agent down. And me? As senior field agent? I know I'm good at technology and computer and stuffs, but…"

"McGee." Ziva interrupts. "If Tony thinks you can do it, you can do it."

"Ya." McGee nodded hesitantly. "I suppose you're right." He looked over at Gibbs' desk. "You really think Gibbs isn't coming back?"

"I do not know, McGee." She looked over at the desk too. "I do not know."


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Swoosh. The automatic doors to autopsy slid open.

"Ducky?" Tony walked over to where the medical examiner was sitting, aware that the old man's scotch was sitting on the table instead of lying in the drawer. Palmer was nowhere to be seen.

"Ah. Anthony. We caught a case?"

Tony settled himself against the table. "No, Ducky."

"You're here about Jethro." Ducky said it more like a statement than a question.

"Yes."

Dr. Mallard waited patiently for a question, but it never came. He sighed.

"Anthony."

"Ducky, don't."

"I wasn't going to defend him, Anthony."

Tony raised an eyebrow.

"I'm angry at him too."

Tony looked surprised, but the scotch on the table was starting to make more sense. "He… he didn't say anything to you?"

"Not a single word the entire trip. Not even a good-bye."

Tony bit hard at his lip. He turned towards the table and poured himself a large glass of scotch. Ducky stayed silent.

After downing the whole glass, Tony looked straight at the M.E. "He really isn't coming back, is he?"

"I'm afraid not." Ducky said sadly.

"I'm really sorry Ducky."

"I'm sorry too."

Both men sighed as they shared this moment of pain together. Eventually, Tony put down his glass and straightened his tie.

"Don't finish the whole bottle, Ducky. I might need some at the end of the day."

Ducky smiled at the retreating back of their new team leader. Tony may be immature and playful at times, but when it really counts, he can be as capable and as dependable as Gibbs.


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"My writing is perfectly fine! McGee."

"I can't see clearly what you're writing, Ziva. Why don't you just type it down?"

"I prefer writing with my hands!"

Tony watched silently from a distance at his team, smiling slightly at their argument.

"What is an oil drin… drip?" McGee peered hard at the piece of paper he was reading from.

"It's oil drum McGee. That report was supposed to be on my desk already." Tony walked into the bullpen.

McGee squinted at the word. "Oh yes it is." He put down the report and signed it. "It's done, boss."

Tony flinched hard at the word "boss" but luckily neither Ziva nor McGee noticed. It was one thing to be called "boss" when Gibbs was still there, and another when he was really the b-o-s-s.

He took the report from McGee and flipped it open, scanning the contents.

McGee watched on with an anxious expression. Tony rolled his eyes.

"Back to work, McGee."

"Er, are the reports alright?" McGee asked hesitantly.

Tony shut the folder, and leaned down to look McGee right in the eye.

"McGee, I don't call you probie anymore. And I won't as long as you're my senior field agent. Do you understand?"

McGee looked Tony in the eye and he thought back to the moments when Tony was calling him "probie" endlessly, teasing him and scaring him. How he was losing his confidence at first, and then slowly learning to stand up for himself, till now where he can totally hold his own as an agent. At that moment, he suddenly understood everything. Too stunned for words, he simply nodded.

"Good. Now back to work."

Tony turned around and caught Ziva smiling at him. He walked over and leaned over her desk.

"Yes? Ziva?"

"I think Gibbs would be really proud if he is here now."

Tony blinked and straightened up. "Too bad he isn't here then."

There must be something in his tone because Ziva looked up in concern.

"Tony…"

"I'm fine, Ziva. Back to work." He pointed to the computer.

Before Ziva can let out another word, Tony already took off in the direction of Abby's lab.


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Tony paused on his way into Abby's lab. He wasn't sure that he wants to do this, or even can do this. Abby was hurting, and she would certainly talk about her feelings and her emotions. That was what she does in such situations, she talks. Any other time Tony would be more than happy to listen to her and tell her that everything will be fine, but this time he wasn't so sure, as his own emotions was flying all over the place. He was barely keeping himself together.

The usually blazing lab was quiet, and the first face he saw when he stepped into the lab was unexpectedly not Abby. Gibbs was giving his Gibbs stare to him from every computer monitor and plasma tv. He wanted to back out immediately at that instant, but he knew he wouldn't. He walked further in.

"Abby?"

"In here."

Tony walked over and saw Abby staring blankly at her computer with Gibbs staring back at her.

"Abs." He sighed.

"What do you think he's doing now, Tony?"

"I don't know."

"Why would he leave us? I mean, I know that he got really upset over the case and how he lost his memory and experiencing the darkest day in his life all over again and everything. But we always get through things together, we have been through so many things together! McGee said that Gibbs just need some time to think things through. Do you think he's coming back real soon?"

"Abby." Tony put his hands on her arms. "He isn't coming back."

"Tony, don't…"

"No, Abs." Tony shook his head. "I'm sorry but that's the truth! He left and that's that."

Abby just looked at him with wide eyes.

"You can keep on staring at his picture all day long and thinking about the reasons he left. But it still doesn't change the fact that he's gone and he won't be coming back anytime soon!"

Abby's eyes started to fill with tears. Tony sighed. He really couldn't do this.

"I'm sorry Abby."

The forensic scientist just shook her head and smiled sadly at him.

"I understand, Tony." She leaned forward and gave him a quick but tight hug. "I really do."


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It was already starting to get dark when Tony finally exited Abby's lab. After the hug, they huddled together and started to talk about everything and anything, just like they would when they went out or have movie nights together. Abby was feeling much happier and being more herself when he finally left.

Tony went straight to the director's office. Cynthia wasn't at her desk, so he just walked straight in.

Director Shepard looked up from her files in alarm. "Agent DiNozzo!"

"Sorry director. Cynthia wasn't at her desk."

Jenny took off her glasses and stood up. "You have something important?"

"I do." Tony walked over to the desk. "Put us back in rotation, Jenny."

"You think your team's ready?"

"They weren't before. Now they are."

Jenny nodded. "Okay. Are y-o-u ready?"

Tony stared at her, understanding her underlying question. "I might not be fine now, director. But I'm ready."

"Okay, Tony. Take the rest of the day off. Your team are back on-call tomorrow."

"Thank you, Jenny."

When Tony closed the door to the director's office, he leant on it and took in a deep breath. The first day alone was like running a never-ending marathon. Other than that, there were still the various emotions he was feeling but ignoring till now to be dealt with, and he really didn't want to face it. It wasn't really new news though. Everyone important in his life took off eventually. His dad, his ex-fiancee and now Gibbs. Maybe he just wasn't important enough for them. Tony decided to just shove his feelings away for now, maybe he will deal with it later. For now, he was just too tired.


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