LOVE LETTERS
"I love you so much. I have for so long," Ludwig blushed and looked away from the paper he was holding.
He had been cleaning the kitchen and noticed Feliciano's journal on the table. When he picked it up
several loose papers fell out. As he bent down to retrieve them he saw his name.
"Ludwig, I love you so. If only I could tell you."
Stunned, he sat down at the table and read the top paper. It was a poem to him, a love poem, from
Feliciano. He felt his face heat up as he read it.
"I shouldn't be reading this. It's his personal things," he thought. But as he finished the first
page and looked at the second- just out of curiosity of course- he couldn't stop. There were 14 pages,
all about him and to him. He opened the journal to place the pages back inside only to discover the
book full of more poetry, letters and small sketches of him in the margins. He sat in silence staring
at the papers and the journal. He was too shocked to even think or move. He knew Feliciano was in the
bathroom taking a shower and would be out any minute. He also knew when he saw him it would be very
obvious from his face that something was up. Feliciano would pepper him with questions and he'd more
than likely tell him or just look at Feli's journal and he'd know. Feliciano would probably feel
upset and embarrassed and run to his room and lock himself in.
Ludwig looked at the date of the first entry about him. It was dated almost 2 years ago. Two years?
Had Feliciano been secretly in love with him that long? Why hadn't he said something? Anything?
Didn't he know Ludwig felt the same? He felt his face get warm at the thought. He'd been writing his
own notes about Feliciano for a while too. His weren't nowhere near as beautiful or poetic as Feli's
though. Wow.
He remembered the first moment he realized he loved Feliciano as more than a friend. They were running
during training and had stopped to rest next to a stone wall. Feliciano sat on the ground panting trying
to catch his breath with his eyes closed. Ludwig glanced down at him and smiled. He studied the smaller
man's face- his eyes, hair, nose, and those beautiful full pink lips. He blushed and looked away, then
glanced back. Feli was staring up at him smiling.
"Ludi sit down with me!" he cried as he grabbed Ludwig's hand. Ludwig's face turned crimson as he allowed
Feliciano to pull him down and sat in front of him. Feli looked at Ludwig for a few minutes before he reached
his hands to his face, caressing his chin and cheeks, then running his fingers in his hair. Ludwig suppressed
a moan of pleasure and happiness as Feliciano pulled the front of his hair over his forehead, and beamed.
"You should let your hair down like this sometimes. It's super cute Ludi."
Feli smiled sweetly at him as he blushed deeply. Feli giggled and rested his hands on Ludwig's shoulders, and smiled.
Ludwig stared at Feliciano, sweaty and with his hair in his eyes, and knew at that moment he was hopelessly
in love with his best friend. He wanted to say something or run away, but all he could do was sit there
and stare at Feliciano, lost in those big brown eyes. He would probably still be there too if it hadn't
started to rain at that moment. Squealing, Feliciano jumped up, running towards the house, Ludwig following
after him. Ludwig smiled and chuckled at how fast Feliciano can run when he wanted to. It was that night Ludwig
had written the first entry in his journal about Feliciano. He described the feeling of Feli's fingers on his
face and in his hair. It was the first of many times he'd called Feli his angel. It fit him perfectly, he thought.
That sweet cherub face in so many of his thoughts and dreams. He'd try to wake up before Feliciano every morning
so he could watch him sleep and run his fingers through that soft auburn hair and smile. "If only I could tell him."
So he began to write down all those things he so wanted to say to Feliciano. Almost every day he'd write some little
something about Feli. He'd written so much he'd lost count of how many pages he had. His angel, his Feli.
He stared at Feliciano' journal on the table. Maybe if he told Feli he'd been writing to him also and that he loved
him too it would be ok. As he sat at the table lost in thought, he didn't hear Feliciano walk in the room, drying his
hair, wearing boxers and Ludwig's t-shirts. And looking incredibly adorable in it. Ludwig blushed at that thought
and looked away.
"Hello Ludi," Feliciano cheerily called out as he rubbed the towel in his hair. He dropped it over the back of a chair
and went to the refrigerator. He opened the door and leaned in, looking for last night's left over pasta. Ludwig glanced at
Feli and blushed even harder. Feliciano's cute round butt was in the air pointed at him and wiggling.
"Uhh, hhhello Feli."
Feliciano pulled the bowl out of the fridge and walked to the table and sat next to Ludwig. He began to dig into the
spaghetti and glanced at Ludwig.
"You ok?"
Ludwig stared at his hands, not wanting to meet Feliciano's eyes.
"He'll know I read his journal. Will he be upset or mad? Maybe knowing i return his feelings it'll be ok. First I'll have to
admit I read his journal and confess my feelings."
Ludwig was in deep thought when he felt Feliciano touch his arm. He glanced at Feli, then his hands again.
"I uh..."Ludwig felt his face grow impossibly hotter as he looked at Feliciano quickly, then looked away.
Feliciano raised his eyebrows as he sat his fork down and stared at Ludwig.
"Are you ill? You look so flushed." Feli looked concerned as he put his hands on Ludwig's cheeks.
Ludwig jerked slightly at Feliciano's touch. Feli dropped his hands quickly and inhaled sharply.
"I, I'm sorry Ludi. I didn't mean to touch you. I know you say a lot don't touch me. I know you say i do that waaaaaaaaay too
much but sometimes i just forget. Sometimes you just look so nice or your hair looks so soft or like now your face
looks so red like maybe your not feeling well or something's wrong and I'm just not sure what's going on..." Feli stopped
talking as he followed Ludwig's gaze to his journal on the table, then swallowed hard.
"Uh, dddddid you, uh, see anything in my journal?"
Ludwig knew he couldn't lie. He was a bad liar. So he thought h'ed just admit he'd read it and go from there. He cleared his
throat and looked up at Feliciano.
"Yes Feli, I did. Some loose pages fell out and, well, I saw my name and, uh, well..." Ludwig ran his hand over his hair
and glanced away nervously.
Feliciano was so shocked he didn't know what to say or even do. Ludwig was afraid to look at Feli. He wasn't sure if Feli
would be mad or hurt or how he'd feel. Feliciano suddenly stood up, grabbing his journal.
"That was my personal things," he whispered, then turned and walked to his room, closing the door behind him.
Ludwig looked towards the direction Feliciano had gone in stunned silence. What do i do now? He sat thinking for a few
minutes, then stood and walked to his office. He turned on his laptop and once it was running brought up his personal file,
the file where he'd written about Feli for about 2 years now. He then went to Feliciano's door and knocked.
When he got no answer he cleared his throat.
"Uh, Feli, can you please come out? I want to show you something."
He didn't hear anything for a few minutes and was about to knock again when he heard Feli's voice.
"Please go away Ludwig" and a slight sob.
Damn, why did he make Feli cry?
"Feli please, I need to show you something. I'm sorry i read your journal. I want to show you something I've been writing
for over two years about you."
He thought maybe he'd just done too much and Feliciano wouldn't forgive him ever, but the door slowly opened and Feli
peeked out.
"You wrote something about me?"
Feliciano opened the door fully and looked at him.
"Yyyou're not mad at me for what I wrote about you?"
Ludwig smiled and wiped tears from Feli's cheeks.
"Surprised, stunned, happy, but no not mad," he said as he felt his face heat up again.
Feliciano stared at him. "Happy? You were happy to read what i wrote?"
Ludwig nodded and held his hand out to Feliciano.
"Yes, I was very happy."
Feliciano took Ludwig's hand. Ludwig smiled and squeezed it.
"Please, let me show you what I've written now."
Feli smiled and wiped his eyes as he walked with Ludwig to his office. He glanced nervously at Ludwig as he sat in his desk
chair and looked at the computer screen. He slowly began to read Ludwig's letters about him, describing how beautiful his
smile was, how lovely his eyes are, how he'd pat him on the head sometimes just to have an excuse to touch his hair.
After reading for about 10 minutes he stopped and looked at Ludwig. Ludwig looked across the room with a nervous sigh as his
face felt warm yet again.
Feliciano clicked back to the very first entry and saw the date.
"Ludwig you've been writing about me longer than I've been writing about you."
Feli stared at the screen, stunned. He looked up at Ludwig smiling. Ludwig look at Feliciano and their eyes met. He couldn't help
the deep blush that spread over his face or how his heart fluttered and beat harder. He smiled at Feliciano nervously.
"Uh, yeah, i guess so."
Feliciano stood slowly and put his hands on Ludwig's cheeks. Ludwig jerked slightly but didn't pull away and returned Feliciano's
gaze.
"You love me as much as I love you Ludi." he whispered as a tear slowly rolled down his cheek. Ludwig wiped the tear away and placed
his hands on top of Feli's, smiling.
"Yes i do love you Feli, very much."
He slowly leaned to Feliciano until their lips met. Feli gasped into the kiss but leaned in returning it. Ludwig wrapped his arms
about Feliciano's waist and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. Feliciano closed his eyes and reached his arms around Ludwig's neck.
After a few minutes, they parted, leaning their foreheads together.
"I love you too Ludi. so so so so much." Feli whispered smiling.
