Disclaimer: I don't own any Kamen Rider at all, not even OOO sadly.

Author's Note:

Prompted by a friend (shoutout to Anthony!) for NaNiWriMo. Am slightly late, but so much fun writing this out. Hope ya'll enjoy woots!

Kamen Rider Kadobouto

TagLine: Boutosuruna!

With all the Greeds and Yammies that had passed through, PLUS all the random team-ups AND being thrown transported from one universe to another, Eiji thought he had seen it all.

Clearly not.

Next to him, Ankh snorted, then broke down into derisive laughter.

"I-iya, Ankh, at least it looks pretty cool right?" Eiji started, hoping the other Kamen Rider did not hear him.

"Who the f*** cares?" Ankh spits, "It's f***ing cardboard."

"Nnngh…"

That, Ejiji had nothing to say to, as he watched the very… boxy (no pun intended) Kamen Rider in front of him battle what looked like a monster bear-wolf-hybrid built entirely out of origami.

"Bokksu Karuto Anforudo (Box Cart Unfold)!"

The surprisingly nimble box station wagon unfolded to reveal an entirely white but still unmistakably cardboard-looking motorcycle, before folding in on itself and attaching as extendable wings to the sides of the motorbike.

The bike revved despite no visible signs of any engine, and the sound reminded Eiji too much of shredding paper.

Eiji felt his head starting to hurt.

The Kamen Rider leapt onto his bike and flew off to dive at the origami bear-wolf in an aerial attack.

"Sutorongu Peipa Shuuutaa (Strong Paper Shooter)!"

From between the handlebars of the bike, another paperfold compartment folded back to shoot out a storm of cardboard airplanes. Stronger than their plain paper counterparts, the cardboard planes easily blew the origami bear-wolf to pieces, leaving bits of flaming coloured paper fluttering in the wind.

"Yatta!" "Yosho!"

Eiji looked around at the cheering nakama of the Kamen Rider and laughed nervously as the Kamen Rider de-henshin-ed, his brown and white armour folding into itself until it folded down into a… small nondescript square cardboard piece.

It wasn't even a paper phone, or even one of those paper wallets. It was literally just a plain brown square of innocuous cardboard. With a small logo inscribed at the edge of it, barely visible.

"That is the STUPIDEST thing I've seen in my life," Ankh declared.

Eiji just stared, his mouth opening and closing mutely in disbelief.

Why was this his life?