Well….this is a one-off with Remi and Siri for Valentines day…
It's not really 'SLASH' because nothing happened lol. I just wanted to write a Valentines-ish story :D
No one ever came here, this was Remus' place, where he could sit and think without the other Marauders being there. He liked being alone; and since tonight was the evening of the full moon he wanted to be alone to think. He would have to walk down to the hospital wing quite soon, and meet secretly with his friends at the Shrieking Shack.
Remus had liked Sirius for a while now, and since today was Valentines Day, he thought it was the best day to tell him; however, he was scared. Scared of what Sirius would say, because Remus was sure he did not feel the same way.
He was sitting quietly in the room at the very top of Gryffindor Tower; no one knew about this room, it wasn't known among all the other students in the school. Remus had found the secret passageway while plotting the Marauders Map with the others, only the four of them knew about it.
Tracing star patterns in the window; while the small droplets of condensation were trickling slowing down the glass, Remus was thinking of what he would actually say to Sirius, when a gentle creak in the floorboards made him jump. He didn't look around as the creaking got louder and nearer. He knew it was Sirius behind him, who else could it be? He heard him stop quietly behind, and could hear him breathing heavily, as if he had been running, or as if he was scared, maybe? Why would he be scared?
"Hello, Sirius" Remus said, without turning, but continuing to trace patterns in the window, he added the small shape of a circle between the stars, indicting the full moon
Sirius hesitated and then sat down beside him quietly, "How did you know it was me?"
"My Sirius senses were tingling," he said happily, with a faint smile on his face."How did you know that I was here?"
"Well, that must have been my Moony senses" he replied in a gentle tone.
Remus giggled a little; and Sirius liked that smile, he liked to make Remus laugh.
Sirius turned to look at Remus, but he didn't turn back, he continued to draw patterns on the window, with a small smile; Sirius couldn't tell weather it was happy smile or a sad one.
"Full moon tonight Moony?" He asked
Remus nodded.
"That's come around quick"
Remus didn't answer, he knew Sirius was just trying to make conversation, but the way he was trying Remus could tell that something was wrong. He kept quiet for a while, and Sirius said nothing more.
Eventually turning around Remus looked at Sirius and saw him staring out the window with a sad but scared look in his eyes. The sudden sound of Remus' voice made Sirius jump.
"Are you okay?" Remus asked, looking at him with concern.
Sirius shook his head, "No" came the reply.
Remus put his hand out to touch Sirius' arm, and he squeezed it gently in comfort.
Sirius looked away as he felt the tears filling his eyes; trying to hold them back, he closed his eyes, but a few still fell lightly down his face. "I have..to..t-tell you something" his voice faltered.
Remus rubbed his arm softly, "Okay.."
Sirius turned to look at Remus, and Remus looked back. As soon as he looked into Sirius eyes, he knew exactly what he was going to tell him, and he knew Sirius felt the same way. He saw the look of love in his eyes, mixed with fear and sadness; he wanted to say something but he smiled softly instead.
Sirius smiled back slightly, "I..um…Remus..I" he hesitated. "Um…No..n-never mind…do you want-want to go now…we have potions next" his voice continued to falter and he tried to guide the conversation away from what he actually wanted to say. He looked away again.
Remus sighed, "I-I love you too" he said quickly.
"What?" Sirius looked back to Remus.
"I love you," he said a little more loudly.
"No" said Sirius at once, "No you don't" he turned back and faced out to the window again, slightly ducking his head down, his long black hair falling smoothly onto his face. "No one loves me, my parents don't love me" The tears began to fall again, but more so quickly this time, he laughed a little, "Even my brother hates me."
Remus moved closer and put his arm around Sirius' shoulders. "No, I don't think he does, Sirius, he looks up to you, you're his older brother- "
"I'm no brother to him. I'm a Gryffindor remember? I was a traitor..as….as soon as I was sorted. I thought Gryffindors were supposed to be brave?" his voice was shaky and filled with hurt and sorrow. "I'm not brave…maybe I should have been in Slytherin after all.."
"No..Siri..don't be like this.." Remus moved his hand up to Sirius' face and gently pushed the hair out of his eyes. Sirius tried to smile, he closed his eyes as the tears continued to fall. Remus took the chance to pull him into a close tight hug. Sirius pressed his face to Remus' chest and cried quietly as Remus held him protectively, rubbing gentle circles along his back.
"I love you Siri.." he said softly.
Sirius looked up slowly, and saw that Remus' eyes were filled with love; a genuine love.
"I love you too" Sirius replied.
Remus giggled lightly and Sirius smiled to himself.
"Well….I best be going now" said Remus after a while, "It's getting dark and the moon will be arriving soon"
"Sure.." Sirius replied, retreating back from Remus' grasp. He sat leaning his back against the wall, pulling his knees up to his chest, and resting his head on them. He looked back to the window where Remus had traced the stars and moon; they had faded slightly as the rain carried on falling.
Remus noticed that Sirius was watching the pattern and the droplets forming smears along the window. He traced the patterns again, making them reappear darker on the window, the condensation droplets falling again and making gentle tracks under the stars. He got up looking at Sirius and smiled. "I'll see you later"
