A/N: Hellooooooo! I know I know, you'd rather have an update for "Black Coffee and Green Tea", but trust me that one's halfway done and will be up soon. However, talking to my aaaamazing friend Mary (werealljustwinginit) again led to some spectacular story ideas. Here's one of them. Another version of this particular idea will be up in less than two minutes! (Title: "Her")
Summary:
"I have moved on from it." "But you haven't moved on from her." His gaze shifted to the necklace resting atop the velvet box in his desk drawer. Abby had been right. Tiva. One-shot. Tag to 12x06.
Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS or any of its charactersssssss. There you go. Happy?
Please enjoy reading! :)


Tony's gaze shifted to the golden object in the drawer. Ziva's necklace. He carefully took it into his shaking hand and traced the outline of the star with his thumb. Tears started pooling in his eyes. His thoughts went back to Abby's little confrontation earlier that day.

"We need to talk."
"Words I'm never fond of hearing."

"I know you, Tony. The real you. Not the 'fake happy front you put up'-you."

"This whole random act of dating...nobody's buying it, okay? We know you're lonely. And we know why. Ziva."

The words he'd been dreading to hear. The way she'd told him that nobody was buying his stories. Stories about dates, about how perfectly happy he was. The thing was, he hadn't really expected anyone to buy those stories, but he'd still hoped they would. And he had certainly not expected anyone to call him out on in. Definitely not Abby. This had been the first Abby-like experience he'd had in over a year. Ever since Ziva had left, Abby had been different too. He hadn't been the only one to put up a facade.

And just when he'd thought the whole conversation with Abby couldn't get any worse for him, she had made him say it.

"Say it! Ziva."
"Come on, I can say it. I know her name."

"Ziva."

It was the first time he'd said her name in over a year. He had tried to avoid it. Had said "she", "her", "you". But never "Ziva". And it hurt. God, how those four letters hurt.

"We all miss her. I love Ziva, but she left us, she is gone. And it hurts. And it sucks. But that's reality. And you have to face it."
"I have faced it. Many, many times. She said no. She didn't wanna come back. That's that. I have moved on from it."

"But you haven't moved on from her. And you can't keep putting your life on hold, waiting for her to show up, cause she probably never will."
"I know. Doesn't make it any easier."

"The truth is, I miss my friend."
"You have friends here, too, Tony. Don't forget."
"I know. Thanks, Abby."

Tony knew Abby hadn't bought his "I miss my friend"-thing. But still he hadn't been able to bring himself to call Ziva anything else. Not in front of someone else. This thing – or whatever it was – between them was for them to know and nobody else to find out. And honestly, he wasn't even sure what would be the accurate word to call her. He knew it wasn't 'friend', but he didn't know what else it could be either.

He looked back at the necklace in his hand and Abby's words rung in his ears. No matter how painful it had been to say Ziva's name, no matter how much the whole conversation had bothered him, there was one thing that had stuck with him more than anything else. That one thing Abby had said. He couldn't get it out of his head.

"But you haven't moved on from her."

He had moved on from the fact that she'd sent him away. It didn't mean he liked it, but he had learned to accept it. But Abby was right. He hadn't moved on from Ziva. And truth be told, he wasn't sure whether he would ever be able to. His gaze shifted to the other object in his drawer. The small black velvet box. He didn't even know why he was keeping it in his desk drawer at work. Maybe because he couldn't get that thought out of his head. The thought of the elevator opening and her stepping out, walking into the bullpen like she had nine years ago. The thing was, Abby had been right on that one too. Ziva would probably not come back.

And even though, God yes, he knew that, it hadn't stopped him from doing it. He had asked his dad for his mother's ring, gotten a new box for it. And now it was resting in his drawer, Ziva's necklace atop of it. Because both the ring and the necklace belonged to her. Along with his heart.

He sighed and put the necklace back on top of the velvet box. Where it belonged until Ziva came back. Then he took out his phone and scrolled through his contacts. A chocked sob escaped his throat when he looked at her contact information.

With shaking hands he opened his email server on his computer and composed a very short email.

"I wanted to call you. Then I realized I only have your American number."

No "Dear Ziva", no signature, nothing. He hesitated for only a second before pressing the send-button.

His gaze shifted to the now closed drawer again. He knew Abby had been right about a lot of things. He just hoped she wasn't right about one thing. Yes, it was very likely that Ziva would probably not come back. But 'probably' was what Tony was hanging on to. The only thing he could hold onto. Because maybe, just maybe, she would come back. One day. And no matter how far in the future that day would be, he would still not have moved on from her.


A/N: Tadaaaaaa! Please let me know what you think in the reviews section below :) Love to hear from you guys!
As I said, be on the look-out for the second version of this "thing". It'll be up in two minutes, with the title "Her".
Kisses,
~ C.